i've been on these boards for 25 years. this is not "the internet", and should never be dismissed as that, especially to excuse or allow what might be labeled "typical and unavoidable online bullying". this is not elon's twitter. this is not reddit.
this is a community, and always has been. i know many of you in real life. some i knew before and separately from these sites, and others since. i've met a whole bunch more out in the world just once or twice. i've met some of you for lunch, a beer, scored coke for one of you, and connected another of you with a midget for a bachelor party in vegas. rip donny.
i am friends with derka. not "friendly", friends. i knew he and bob had been meeting and working on things, and i thought that was great of bob to do, and i know derka appreciated it. i did not become friends with derka to help him through his mental issues, i became friends with him because i like him and we have a lot in common and i enjoy talking sports and tv shows with him. we text most every day. i've texted with his mom, and she is a wonderful and supportive human being. happy birthday, betsy.
derka gets worked up here, like others do at home, a sporting event, a bar, or a grocery store. everyone has their outlets. that's who he is, and if you don't think he's worked hard and gotten a shit-ton better over the years, you haven't been paying attention.
derka has an issue letting things go and settling back down from a worked-up state. he'd be the first to admit this. he has bitten his tongue, so to speak, dozens, if not hundreds of times, when people would antagonize him. it's bullshit it was happening to begin with, but he was doing his best not to exacerbate the issue. what you've seen from him on this site is not perfect, but it was the best he could do, and i consider it admirable. again, i'm his friend, so i am a biased commenter here.
there's nothing about this situation that doesn't suck. i think most of us are on the same page on that. surly is not groupthink. it's not an echo chamber. even the cloak room isn't that way, though it's often characterized as such. anyone who says that hasn't been over there in several years.
there are lots of opinions, lots of discussions, and lots of characters that fill out this community. but there's only one derka.
immamac is trying to change that, and i disagree mightily with this decision. it also sucked that it was made in advance, which makes this even more inexcusable. flying off the handle and making a rash decision at least could be understood, if not justified. yes, it is his decision to make, no one is disputing whether he has that ability. yes, it sucks that derka and bob were on the road to recovery, and immamac stepped in and reversed that progress.
ironically, this type of reversal is exactly the type of thing that drives derka over the edge. he jumped through the hoops, he did the work, he shared himself, he was honest and self-deprecating about it.
and now he's told no, it's easier just to rid ourselves of you.
someone upthread called derka a cancer. i know because i negged him. it's probably my 2nd or 3rd ever neg-rep and i stand by it. cancer needs to be removed to make the body stronger. that's not what's happening here.
if derka is gone for good, it will make things worse. worse for him and worse for this community. from reading through this thread, it's pretty obvious that i'm not alone in this opinion.
a few pages ago, immamac said that sometimes derka would get banned, and he would get pm's asking for him to be reinstated, because derka had asked people to do this. as someone who has sent one of those pm's, i can say i was not asked to do so. if you know derka at all, you would know he doesn't go around begging others to fight his battles. shit, how could anyone not know this? i saw what happened and sent those messages on my own accord, because while i don't always do what's right, i always know what's right.
and this is not right. reinstate him. it's what's right.