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Wives and the Stupid Shit They Say/Do


Spur08

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As someone with a wife from a 3rd world country, Eddie Murphy was right. With Facebook and social media they will talk to other women from their country that have foreign husbands that let them get and do everything they want and then they will start asking for the same.  Not to mention American women getting hold of them if you live in the USA. There is no safe wife pool.
 
 


Friend with a mail order Russian bride would agree. She owns his ass.
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12 hours ago, Pato del Muerto said:

Don’t those fully cooked bacon packages have like 6 strips in them, separated with a plastic insert that spaces them out?  If so that’s a lot of freezer space for a half pound of bacon. 

They have some at Sam's that come in a big plastic bag and don't need to be refrigerated until opened.

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2 hours ago, Hate said:


Wait, Junior Miller lives in Illinois??

Lived. Past tense. 
 

*Tinfoil hat* - they just want you to believe they didn’t have the virus and weren’t going to die from it. This is how China keeps the numbers down. /tinfoil hat

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Mrs. A: Hey dear I am late. I am on day 58. 

A: Yeah, look its probably just stress.  I had a vasectomy and am shooting blanks.

Mrs. A: I wish I could just go to Walgreens and buy a test.

A: This is dumb, but if you must buy one off amazon.

Mrs. A: It's gonna take a week to deliver, i can't go that long under the circumstances without wine.

A: Well, I do have the second jizz kit from Dr. Shah. If you are willing to help things out we can go do that. 

 

So the test was negative, but I a got a beej and a little helping hand. She tried but could not cancel the order for a pregnancy test through amazon.  All in all, I count this one as a win under the circumstances. 

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Precooked and “microwave ready” bacon is an abomination. Especially since you can microwave regular bacon anyway in a pinch.
Yea this. I eat bacon 3ish times a year and have had the precooked once. More salt than the ocean.

Give me a skillet and 7 minutes to cook it until black where it is crunchy like potato chips.
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3 hours ago, Anastasis said:

So the test was negative, but I a got a beej and a little helping hand. She tried but could not cancel the order for a pregnancy test through amazon.  All in all, I count this one as a win under the circumstances. 

9 minutes ago, mulletpelini said:

unless........she really is pregnant 

Any resemblance to me is purely coincidental.

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7 hours ago, markstanco said:

Yea this. I eat bacon 3ish times a year and have had the precooked once. More salt than the ocean.

Give me a skillet and 7 minutes to cook it until black where it is crunchy like potato chips.

Black, crunchy bacon?  

You ridiculous dude. 

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Mrs. A: Hey dear I am late. I am on day 58. 
A: Yeah, look its probably just stress.  I had a vasectomy and am shooting blanks.
Mrs. A: I wish I could just go to Walgreens and buy a test.
A: This is dumb, but if you must buy one off amazon.
Mrs. A: It's gonna take a week to deliver, i can't go that long under the circumstances without wine.
A: Well, I do have the second jizz kit from Dr. Shah. If you are willing to help things out we can go do that. 
 
So the test was negative, but I a got a beej and a little helping hand. She tried but could not cancel the order for a pregnancy test through amazon.  All in all, I count this one as a win under the circumstances. 


Best believe I would have gloved and masked up and gone to Walgreens. They can probably hand you a test at the drive through.
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Yea this. I eat bacon 3ish times a year and have had the precooked once. More salt than the ocean.

Give me a skillet and 7 minutes to cook it until black where it is crunchy like potato chips.


Black and hard - just like you like your men.
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12 hours ago, Anastasis said:

Mrs. A: Hey dear I am late. I am on day 58. 

A: Yeah, look its probably just stress.  I had a vasectomy and am shooting blanks.

Mrs. A: I wish I could just go to Walgreens and buy a test.

A: This is dumb, but if you must buy one off amazon.

Mrs. A: It's gonna take a week to deliver, i can't go that long under the circumstances without wine.

A: Well, I do have the second jizz kit from Dr. Shah. If you are willing to help things out we can go do that. 

 

So the test was negative, but I a got a beej and a little helping hand. She tried but could not cancel the order for a pregnancy test through amazon.  All in all, I count this one as a win under the circumstances. 

There’s another thread for people who will suck dick for wine

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I've been doing gig grocery delivery and gotdamn I can't understand how women live on their phone but can't answer a text in a timely manner. All these wives want input on every little thing if what they ordered is out of stock but can't bother answering even though they just texted me something 2 seconds ago.

 

 

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