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Trivial things that make you surly


elfenix

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12 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

99 times out of a hundred the book is better.  Exceptions:

Deliverance.

The old man and the sea

Horseshit. Deliverance is quite possibly THE Great American Novel. The Old Man and the Sea won both the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction and the Nobel Prize for Literature. Read ‘em again, man!

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6 minutes ago, Horn Draoi said:

Horseshit. Deliverance is quite possibly THE Great American Novel. The Old Man and the Sea won both the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction and the Nobel Prize for Literature. Read ‘em again, man!

I have, and the movies capture the feeling, and themes in a more visceral way than the books, especially Deliverance (IMO).  

Pssst the great American novel is The Great Gatsby of course.

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21 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

I have, and the movies capture the feeling, and themes in a more visceral way than the books, especially Deliverance (IMO).  

Pssst the great American novel is The Great Gatsby of course.

I thought it was To Kill a Mockingbird. 

Written by Kurt Cobain, of course. 

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4 hours ago, Superhero said:

You know what really grinds my gears?

How most "fitted" bed sheets are now made for mattresses > 15" thick deep.  Now I have to use bedsheet grippers to keep the sheet taut. It's a collusion between the bedsheet makers and the bedsheet grippers I tell you. 

 

so you make your wife/ SO hold the sheets down?

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6 hours ago, Superhero said:

You know what really grinds my gears?

How most "fitted" bed sheets are now made for mattresses > 15" thick deep.  Now I have to use bedsheet grippers to keep the sheet taut. It's a collusion between the bedsheet makers and the bedsheet grippers I tell you. 

 

bro upgrade your tatami mats

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I might have already posted this, but it happened again at lunch-- when the cashier hands you your change with the coins stacked on top of the bills so that you have to grab it all at once. Is it really that hard to hand me the coins first, let me drop those in my pocket, and then hand me the bills so I can put those in my money clip?

Or even better, count that shit back to me.

 

Or, in the new days of covid, slide it across the counter and let me pick it up so I don't accidentally touch your filthy hand.

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36 minutes ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

I might have already posted this, but it happened again at lunch-- when the cashier hands you your change with the coins stacked on top of the bills so that you have to grab it all at once. Is it really that hard to hand me the coins first, let me drop those in my pocket, and then hand me the bills so I can put those in my money clip?

Or even better, count that shit back to me.

 

Or, in the new days of covid, slide it across the counter and let me pick it up so I don't accidentally touch your filthy hand.

Bills, change, and the receipt all in one sloppy pile.  Pisses me off to the point of triviality, and that's annoying...

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20 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Bills, change, and the receipt all in one sloppy pile.  Pisses me off to the point of triviality, and that's annoying...

If the person in line behind you seems like an asshole anyway, just stand at the register and take your time putting all your shit where it goes. Maybe they'll eventually get the hint if enough people do this... 

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2 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

If the person in line behind you seems like an asshole anyway, just stand at the register and take your time putting all your shit where it goes. Maybe they'll eventually get the hint if enough people do this... 

Yeah, I hear ya. I just never want to add to the clusterfuck if at all possible.

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1 hour ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

I might have already posted this, but it happened again at lunch-- when the cashier hands you your change with the coins stacked on top of the bills so that you have to grab it all at once. Is it really that hard to hand me the coins first, let me drop those in my pocket, and then hand me the bills so I can put those in my money clip?

Or even better, count that shit back to me.

 

Or, in the new days of covid, slide it across the counter and let me pick it up so I don't accidentally touch your filthy hand.

You're using cash?  You poor luddite.

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16 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

I have, and the movies capture the feeling, and themes in a more visceral way than the books, especially Deliverance (IMO).  

Pssst the great American novel is The Great Gatsby of course.

 

16 hours ago, ztejas said:

I thought it was To Kill a Mockingbird. 

Written by Kurt Cobain, of course. 

All the King’s Men by Robert Penn Warren in second place, ahead of “Gatsby;”  Southern writers just do better.  “Mockingbird” for honorable mention.  Why do I love headcase, alcoholic Southern writers so? (Now avoiding mirrors........)

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The zoo.

Wife bought passes this summer.  We've been 5 times.  Same animals.  Same habitats.  Add to that more people and my SIL yapping about fucking macaroons for an hour.  And, no, I did not get autocorrected from macaw or baboons.  She really did talk about the dessert for an hour.  F's sake.

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When physics defies itself in order to fuck me over.

I'll give you an example: try to pour liquid gently from one glass into another. Not water, it's too easy to clean up. Use something like gatorade or soda-pop. The more sugar the better. 

Watch as it runs UPHILL along the side of the glass and onto the floor (or counter), making a nice mess that now needs cleaned up.

Fuck you, science. 

Edited by Deamerxt
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21 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

The zoo.

Wife bought passes this summer.  We've been 5 times.  Same animals.  Same habitats.  Add to that more people and my SIL yapping about fucking macaroons for an hour.  And, no, I did not get autocorrected from macaw or baboons.  She really did talk about the dessert for an hour.  F's sake.

I went to the Knoxville Zoo about a year ago, and I found the people there to be far more fascinating than the animals. It was a riveting menagerie of obesity - all manner of exotic and rare varieties of Morbos collected in one location was definitely worth the price of admission. There is a tremendous biodiversity of fatness in east Tennessee. 

And here's a picture of the Doomlet raptly observing the ants in front of the elephant enclosure. 

 

20190824_124203.jpg

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26 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

I went to the Knoxville Zoo about a year ago, and I found the people there to be far more fascinating than the animals. It was a riveting menagerie of obesity - all manner of exotic and rare varieties of Morbos collected in one location was definitely worth the price of admission. There is a tremendous biodiversity of fatness in east Tennessee. 

And here's a picture of the Doomlet raptly observing the ants in front of the elephant enclosure. 

 

20190824_124203.jpg

Ha!  We had zoo passes when we lived in Knoxville as well.  The nice thing about the Knoxville Zoo is that they have a cool kids area AND a building that has some smaller exhibits and another play area.  It wasn't too bad of a thing to let the two boys run around either place for awhile while the two of us relaxed.  Plus, it was about 5 mins from our house.

My post (above) is in reference to the Dallas Zoo.  I mean, zoos are cool and all.  It' just... 5 trips in about 2 months.  

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57 minutes ago, Deamerxt said:

When physics defies itself in order to fuck me over.

I'll give you an example: try to pour liquid gently from one glass into another. Not water, it's too easy to clean up. Use something like gatorade or soda-pop. The more sugar the better. 

Watch as it runs UPHILL along the side of the glass and onto the floor (or counter), making a nice mess that now needs cleaned up.

Fuck you, science. 

My advice, drink less.

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Ha!  We had zoo passes when we lived in Knoxville as well.  The nice thing about the Knoxville Zoo is that they have a cool kids area AND a building that has some smaller exhibits and another play area.  It wasn't too bad of a thing to let the two boys run around either place for awhile while the two of us relaxed.  Plus, it was about 5 mins from our house.
My post (above) is in reference to the Dallas Zoo.  I mean, zoos are cool and all.  It' just... 5 trips in about 2 months.  

Don’t go. I don’t.
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6 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

I hate belts that are way too tight on one hole but way too loose on the next hole

Problem?

mens-pants.jpg?w=584

solution!

edit: upon closer inspection, that pic could be in the lol thread. “Action zone?”  “Snack sack?”

Edited by nnm
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14 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

Yes. Sansabelt slacks need to make a comeback!

Just wait till you hit 70 they'll be back in style along with white shoes, and 4:00 early bird specials....  I see a jorts/cargo pants sansabelt trend just waiting to be exploited.

Edited by Onboard 2.0
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