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Meh. I thought it was ok. They tried to wrap it up and deal with the storyline they were left with after Ep 8, and the fact that Carrie Fisher had died, but I just didn't really care about any of the characters at the end of the day. Honestly the only time I felt anything was when Chewie was sad after hearing that Leia had died. That hit me in the feels, but I didn't really care if any of the new characters died because I felt no connection with them. And then Rey's dead, but Kylo saves her, then they kiss, then he dies? I honestly let out a laugh when he died because it just felt weird, out of place, and honestly comedic in its timing. And why the hell didn't Leia try reaching out to Ben earlier? It seems like that's all it took for him to turn good, just his mom giving him a force call.

Meh.

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The pacing was just fucked, like slow down JJ jesus christ. He constantly makes the characters make stupid decisions because the visual looks cool. The Emperor story line was stupid and made no sense. There were some parts that worked and a lot that fell flat, like oops we killed chewie, just kidding hes alive. Lando felt forced and unnecessary. Keri Russells character was just silly. They were kind of dicks to 3PO and why even have Rose in the movie if they're just gonna give Finn a new girlfriend.

That said the movie looked great and the scenes with Kylo and Rey were the best parts, except for the kiss at the end. Thank you for your service JJ, never direct a movie in a franchise I like ever again please.

Edited by Michael Knight
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Just now, Michael Knight said:

The pacing was just fucked, like slow down JJ jesus christ. He constantly makes the characters make stupid decisions because the visual looks cool. 

And stop having characters talk over each other. Better yet, we can go a few seconds without any dialogue. Let the movie breathe. 

But yeah that's more of a critique of Abrams movies in general.

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I found it odd that really no one ended up with anyone else in the movie. Rey loses Ben. Finn seemed to just go "that's aight to Rose" and seemed awkward around Janna. Poe tried to get back with helmet girl but she gave him the Heisman. At least Chewie got a medal and Rey got a new lightsaber. 

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5 minutes ago, Red Five said:

And stop having characters talk over each other. Better yet, we can go a few seconds without any dialogue. Let the movie breathe. 

But yeah that's more of a critique of Abrams movies in general.

That's a great point. I left the theater thinking "I didn't really get to hear much music from John Williams in this." I know there was some, and some callbacks to old themes, but none of the new music has felt as iconic as some of the stuff in the originals, or even the prequels if I'm being honest. Maybe it's because I haven't watched the new trilogy multiple times like I have the originals, but I felt like I knew Duel of the Fates was fucking awesome the moment I first heard it.

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Also, when the fuck did Palpy have a kid? It would have been around the same time Luke and Leia were born, right? Did he just impregnate some prostitute from Coruscant? Or maybe an intern who just wanted to fuck somebody powerful? I just think it's weird to throw in that he had a son and he NEVER mentioned it at all until the final chapter of the story. Whatever.

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12 minutes ago, Red Five said:

Seriously, did I miss a line of dialogue, or was the only explanation for Palpatine being alive one line from Poe, like "something something cloning"? I kept waiting for Palps to monologue it to Rey but I don't think he did. 

Yeah that’s weird.  It wasn’t as if the Emperor shied away from exposition.  He sat there explaining every step in the Sith sacrifice ritual.

And another thing: why is there a Sith language? Sith is not an ethnicity or species.  And supposedly there are only two at a time.  Isn’t that a waste of time to learn a language you can only speak with one other person?

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And now we’ve seen the movie, and it turns out that, uh, I’m still not really sure how Emperor Palpatine ended up in this movie. He’s not a ghost — he’s just still alive. And he claims that he “made” Snoke, as we see a shot of a cloning tube containing another Snoke body. And he’s got a huge fleet of Star Destroyers that have been hidden under the Exogol ice. And each of those Star Destroyers, apparently, is equipped with a planet-killing Death Star superlaser.

None of this is explained in any way. I guess we’re just not supposed to think about it too much.

https://www.thewrap.com/nothing-about-emperor-palpatines-return-in-star-wars-the-rise-of-skywalker-makes-sense/

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32 minutes ago, DoneWithit said:

We never got to see what Finn wanted to tell Rey but I think it is safe to assume he is force sensitive. Just another story we’ll never get to see. How cool it would have been to see an ex stormtrooper with force abilities. 

Pretty sure it was that he's in love with Rey.  He's had the hots for her since they met.

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58 minutes ago, hornfan785 said:

Also, when the fuck did Palpy have a kid? It would have been around the same time Luke and Leia were born, right? Did he just impregnate some prostitute from Coruscant? Or maybe an intern who just wanted to fuck somebody powerful? I just think it's weird to throw in that he had a son and he NEVER mentioned it at all until the final chapter of the story. Whatever.

This!  Plus, a big plot hole is Palpy had at least one child - where are they and why aren't they in line to succeed him?  Also, if Palpy had Rey's parents killed, doesn't that imply that he killed his own child?  Was this explained somewhere?  WTF?

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1 hour ago, hornfan785 said:

Also, when the fuck did Palpy have a kid? It would have been around the same time Luke and Leia were born, right? Did he just impregnate some prostitute from Coruscant? Or maybe an intern who just wanted to fuck somebody powerful? I just think it's weird to throw in that he had a son and he NEVER mentioned it at all until the final chapter of the story. Whatever.

Probably the same way Anakin was born.  Midichlorians  

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12 hours ago, Michael Knight said:

JJ Abrams is terrible at world building and does not respect the laws of time and space. 

Of course humans don't need helmets or oxygen to fight in space atop the deck of ship with a bunch of other animals that apparently don't require breathing.  And how many discarded ships are there that can just suddenly work?  And again with the air or maybe they're on planets that don't require oxygen so rust isn't a problem--like breathing. Or maybe they're not made of metal--but still.  Still prefer the first 3 and then I'm done with the whole franchise. 

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45 minutes ago, BrickHorn said:

Yeah that’s weird.  It wasn’t as if the Emperor shied away from exposition.  He sat there explaining every step in the Sith sacrifice ritual.

And another thing: why is there a Sith language? Sith is not an ethnicity or species.  And supposedly there are only two at a time.  Isn’t that a waste of time to learn a language you can only speak with one other person?

Record keeping purposes.  Lol?  

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11 hours ago, Captain Obvious said:

I mean, if they were being honest with the title, it would be "Episode IX: Disney's Desperate Attempt at Damage Control."

2 hours ago, DoneWithit said:

When Rey throws the lightsaber at Kylo’s burning fighter and Luke catches it and says something along the lines of “that’s no way to treat the weapon of the Jedi “. That felt like a middle finger to rian johnson from Mark hamill himself. 

2 hours ago, tx 3 putt said:

Meh, she barely had any screen time 

Yeah, they at least listened to the fans and retconned or dialed back a lot of bullshit that set people off in Last Jedi.  They cut out the politics instead of pushing the feminism down our throats.  Rose took a major back seat, she had no meaningful part in the movie whatsoever and they squashed the romance.  They went from Rian Johnson saying "Rey's parents are nobodies" to "Oh, Rey's a Palpatine!"  Luke's character was much improved from what they did with him in Last Jedi.  They even made a reference to the "Holdo Manuever" and poked fun at that.  

23 minutes ago, BrickHorn said:

And another thing: why is there a Sith language? Sith is not an ethnicity or species.  And supposedly there are only two at a time.  Isn’t that a waste of time to learn a language you can only speak with one other person?

The Sith ARE an actual race though, or at least they once were.  There's often confusion because there was an actual Sith race, and then we have the practitioners of the dark side that we also refer to as the Sith.  It's stupid, it's basically the same word for two different things (Although at one time I think there were many dark side practicing Sith and the rule of two was something they created later).

12 hours ago, Red Five said:

Was there a real explanation for Palpatine, outside of a brief line in the beginning about cloning? Was the Emperor in ROTJ a clone? Because that would kind of retroactively ruin the ending of that movie.

39 minutes ago, Red Five said:

Seriously, did I miss a line of dialogue, or was the only explanation for Palpatine being alive one line from Poe, like "something something cloning"? I kept waiting for Palps to monologue it to Rey but I don't think he did. 

They did a call back to Revenge of the Sith.  I think Kylo asks "I thought you died?"  Palpatine responds with "The dark side of the force is a pathway that leads to many abilities some consider to be....unnatural."  I think we're supposed to glean that Palpatine used the force to save himself somehow.  It's a little hard to believe, but then again Maul survived getting cut in half in Phantom Menace and falling too.  

 

58 minutes ago, Michael Knight said:

The pacing was just fucked, like slow down JJ jesus christ. He constantly makes the characters make stupid decisions because the visual looks cool. The Emperor story line was stupid and made no sense. 

I've thought about this bit some.  Palpatine became a necessary evil for Rise of Skywalker (pun intended).  When Johnson fucked up the Snoke character by killing him off early, it left a power vacuum for antagonists going into the last film.  We had two established bad guys:  General Hux and Kylo.  We find out that Hux was a spy of sorts, and honestly he would have never made a good primary antagonist for the film because of his weak nature, so he's out.  Kylo is out too, because he was set to get his redemption arc which they teased from the very first movie.  That left no possible antagonists for a climax with Rey.  So, Abrams really only had two options:  create a new antagonist out of thin air, or bring back an existing character.  It's pretty difficult creating a new supreme bad guy for the final film in a trilogy....there's no history, there's no attachment, you're having to build someone new up against already established characters.  You don't introduce Sauron in the final book of the Lord of the Rings.  So, Abrams went to the well to bring back Palpatine.  Given his powers with the dark side and the bit/reference they made to Revenge of the Sith and Dark Plageus, he made the most sense to return.  It gave Abrams an established bad guy, even if it was played out and it cheapened the Vader redemption arc a bit.

 

1 hour ago, hornfan785 said:

And why the hell didn't Leia try reaching out to Ben earlier? It seems like that's all it took for him to turn good, just his mom giving him a force call.

Disney would just like to say "This holiday season, don't forget to force call your loved ones."

 

 

 

 

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Jesus christ y'all are such buzzkills. This was the best possible outcome after TLJ. Glad JJ was able to somewhat fix that mess. Loved when Luke grabbed the sabre and told Rian to eat shit.

But my all time favorite scene was luke and Leia training.

The nostalgia is the whole reason for these movies existing. We wanna know about Luke and the gang with all their adventures. Glad we got at least some of it.

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2 minutes ago, ulukinatme said:

Yeah, they at least listened to the fans and retconned or dialed back a lot of bullshit that set people off in Last Jedi.  They cut out the politics instead of pushing the feminism down our throats.  Rose took a major back seat, she had no meaningful part in the movie whatsoever and they squashed the romance.  They went from Rian Johnson saying "Rey's parents are nobodies" to "Oh, Rey's a Palpatine!"  Luke's character was much improved from what they did with him in Last Jedi.  They even made a reference to the "Holdo Manuever" and poked fun at that.  

The Sith ARE an actual race though, or at least they once were.  There's often confusion because there was an actual Sith race, and then we have the practitioners of the dark side that we also refer to as the Sith.  It's stupid, it's basically the same word for two different things (Although at one time I think there were many dark side practicing Sith and the rule of two was something they created later).

They did a call back to Revenge of the Sith.  I think Kylo asks "I thought you died?"  Palpatine responds with "The dark side of the force is a pathway that leads to many abilities some consider to be....unnatural."  I think we're supposed to glean that Palpatine used the force to save himself somehow.  It's a little hard to believe, but then again Maul survived getting cut in half in Phantom Menace and falling too.  

 

I've thought about this bit some.  Palpatine became a necessary evil for Rise of Skywalker (pun intended).  When Johnson fucked up the Snoke character by killing him off early, it left a power vacuum for antagonists going into the last film.  We had two established bad guys:  General Hux and Kylo.  We find out that Hux was a spy of sorts, and honestly he would have never made a good primary antagonist for the film because of his weak nature, so he's out.  Kylo is out too, because he was set to get his redemption arc which they teased from the very first movie.  That left no possible antagonists for a climax with Rey.  So, Abrams really only had two options:  create a new antagonist out of thin air, or bring back an existing character.  It's pretty difficult creating a new supreme bad guy for the final film in a trilogy....there's no history, there's no attachment, you're having to build someone new up against already established characters.  You don't introduce Sauron in the final book of the Lord of the Rings.  So, Abrams went to the well to bring back Palpatine.  Given his powers with the dark side and the bit/reference they made to Revenge of the Sith and Dark Plageus, he made the most sense to return.  It gave Abrams an established bad guy, even if it was played out and it cheapened the Vader redemption arc a bit.

 

Disney would just like to say "This holiday season, don't forget to force call your loved ones."

 

 

 

 

"It's the holiday season.  

And Palpatine is back again.

Don't forget to force call your friends

Cuz when Ben and Rey make amends

Leia's lyin' down for dyin', down.  

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17 minutes ago, Jersey Man10 said:

Jesus christ y'all are such buzzkills. This was the best possible outcome after TLJ. Glad JJ was able to somewhat fix that mess. Loved when Luke grabbed the sabre and told Rian to eat shit.

But my all time favorite scene was luke and Leia training.

The nostalgia is the whole reason for these movies existing. We wanna know about Luke and the gang with all their adventures. Glad we got at least some of it.

I'm with you.  I swear I wanted to slap the shit it off the guy next to me.  STFU and just watch the movie.  Don't need commentary about how everything sucks.  

Just wanted to say that I may be the only person happy that the force finally actually looks and feels powerful.  In the OT, as much as I loved start wars, it always bothered me that Vader spoke on how powerful the force was, but it really just seemed like something Harry Potter could easily defeat.

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I've seen people complain about the Force.  They didn't like the Leia Mary Poppins act in Last Jedi, didn't like Force Healing in this movie, whatever.

Every movie they introduce a new Force power, this is nothing new.  New Hope gave us Force Choke, Telepathy, Force Persuade.  Empire Strikes Back gave us Telekinesis.  Return of the Jedi had Force Lightning and Force Jump.  Phantom Menace had Force Run, etc etc.  Force Healing has been around in video games and the books, if the book fags can be trusted, for some time.  As far as the Leia Poppins act, people can use the Force to move objects and people, it wouldn't be a stretch to move oneself in  zero gravity  (Although I don't think we've seen Jedi survive in an oxygen-less environment yet, even in Phantom Menace they had to use rebreathers to go underwater).  I think Leia Poppins caught a lot of people off guard simply because we hadn't seen Leia actually use the Force up to that point.

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1 hour ago, Mdhorn said:

Of course humans don't need helmets or oxygen to fight in space atop the deck of ship with a bunch of other animals that apparently don't require breathing.  And how many discarded ships are there that can just suddenly work?  And again with the air or maybe they're on planets that don't require oxygen so rust isn't a problem--like breathing. Or maybe they're not made of metal--but still.  Still prefer the first 3 and then I'm done with the whole franchise. 

thought they said that they had to get the attack in before the ships left the atmosphere, right?

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46 minutes ago, ulukinatme said:

I've seen people complain about the Force.  They didn't like the Leia Mary Poppins act in Last Jedi, didn't like Force Healing in this movie, whatever.

Every movie they introduce a new Force power, this is nothing new.  New Hope gave us Force Choke, Telepathy, Force Persuade.  Empire Strikes Back gave us Telekinesis.  Return of the Jedi had Force Lightning and Force Jump.  Phantom Menace had Force Run, etc etc.  Force Healing has been around in video games and the books, if the book fags can be trusted, for some time.  As far as the Leia Poppins act, people can use the Force to move objects and people, it wouldn't be a stretch to move oneself in  zero gravity  (Although I don't think we've seen Jedi survive in an oxygen-less environment yet, even in Phantom Menace they had to use rebreathers to go underwater).  I think Leia Poppins caught a lot of people off guard simply because we hadn't seen Leia actually use the Force up to that point. 

I'll bitch about because it's fucking stupid ...force power went from Yoda straining his tiny balls off lifting an single X-wing out of swamp to the Emperor nearly knocking down 10,000 ships with electricity ....yet still his lighting isn't strong enough to kill anyone it just kind of makes them lay down for awhile... unless it's bounced back from a lightsaber then you disintegrate or something  

and now Jedis can heal the sick and raise the dead? lol ...would have been nice if Obi-Wan would have known that little trick when Qui Gon was run through by Darth Maul...

 

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2 hours ago, LonghornSean said:

Pretty sure it was that he's in love with Rey.  He's had the hots for her since they met.

I dunno because Finn could sense it was Kylo that Rey was after and he also sensed a couple of other things. I want to say another one was when he was with the other run away stormtrooper girl. 

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Just saw it. Enjoyable for what is was: Nostalgia. You could literally outline the plot in 5 bullet points. C+ on effort. Well, B- because it’s the holidays. So many questions not answered. As someone said earlier, Finn was pointless. So was Snoke. And Phasma. And the puppet with butthole eyes. Didn’t care about a single character in the trilogy because they were all underdeveloped. The Romeo and Juliet scene made my theatre erupt in laughter. 

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4 minutes ago, Spankytoes said:

Just saw it. Enjoyable for what is was: Nostalgia. You could literally outline the plot in 5 bullet points. C+ on effort. Well, B- because it’s the holidays. So many questions not answered. As someone said earlier, Finn was pointless. So was Snoke. And Phasma. And the puppet with butthole eyes. Didn’t care about a single character in the trilogy because they were all underdeveloped. The Romeo and Juliet scene made my theatre erupt in laughter. 

Had an Excalibur moment when Kylo tosses his saber into the water.  I almost expected an arm to reach up and take it--but then lo and behold when Rey tosses hers later, ol' Luke catches it. 

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3 hours ago, hornfan785 said:

And then Rey's dead, but Kylo saves her, then they kiss, then he dies? I honestly let out a laugh when he died because it just felt weird, out of place, and honestly comedic in its timing. And why the hell didn't Leia try reaching out to Ben earlier? It seems like that's all it took for him to turn good, just his mom giving him a force call.

Meh.

So I'll just try to address from second question first.  I think we're supposed to think because Leia didn't finish her training and dedicate her life to the force, she wasn't as strong as Luke who could force project himself into a duel with Kylo.  She reached out all that way and it took all her force (and life force) out of her.  That one fleeting moment took all her strength and she knew it would but sacrificed herself to save Rey and ultimately, her son.  That's the way I took it anyway.

But back to that kiss..... I absolutely felt the same way you did.  It was stilted, forced, awkward and everything else.  But how awkward was it?  Ben and Rey are kissing cousins.  lol.  While not as incestual as Game of Thrones, there is an ironic feel to making Ben and Rey romantic.  Really quick summary, in the movies, Anakin is considered an immaculate conception and has no father, but in the comics (which are canon now), it is heavily inferred in a Vader vision/dream that Palpatine was responsible for manipulating the midchlorians in Shmi to create her eventual baby Ani.  There is also cut dialogue in the prequels of Palpatine telling Vader he had been waiting for him to eventually grow and come before him to take his place by his side as he is his father. 

So, from a certain point of view, Palpatine is actually Luke/Leia's grandfather, and therefore..... Ben's great grandfather.  In this movie, Sheev is introduced as Rey's grandfather making her father, Anakin's half brother, and Rey is Leia/Luke's cousin...... Ha, ha, ha.  Incestual, awkward, fucking weird kisses!  That's as Star Wars as you can get.  I guess since Sheev never plowed Shmi, it's not supposed to be an issue, but still funny to think about.  The Palpatines and Skywalkers can't get away from each other.

 

 

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Wanted to see it for the schadenfreude.  Just got back.  Wasn't disappointed.

JJ is incapable of making movies any other way.  Here's a thing!  Quick!  Here's another thing!  But wait!  Here's something/someone you remember!  And something else you remember!  No time to stop and think!  Go, go, go, go!  All while hitting every predictable plot point you know he's going to hit. 

The characters matter so little you can have one of the main bad guys in this trilogy reveal he's a spy for the Resistance and then be unceremoniously killed off 30 seconds later.

I was literally falling asleep during this.  Almost missed the Evil Rey part.  Which would have been interesting and cool if, ya know, Rey actually went evil.  So of course we're not doing that.

I ain't even mad.  It's just nonsensical goofiness with zero weight to it.  And the point people have made on this trilogy versus the Prequels is bang on.  The Prequels are garbage, but at least Lucas had a clear idea of what he wanted to do and stuck to it through three films.  These movies are so disjointed and all over the place that it just becomes silly.  Disney really needed someone with some brains at the top running this whole thing from start to finish.  I doubt with their market-tested, please as many people as possible, while selling as many toys as possible MO that we'd have gotten some all-time great films, but it would have been better than this.

Save us, Dave Filoni.  You're our only hope! 

 

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When Rey throws the lightsaber at Kylo’s burning fighter and Luke catches it and says something along the lines of “that’s no way to treat the weapon of the Jedi “. That felt like a middle finger to rian johnson from Mark hamill himself. 
I'm seeing the movie sometime this weekend but really don't remember all that much from TLJ. Why do people pan it so much, and what do you mean about Luke giving a FU to Rian Johnson? Guess I need to watch it again.

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21 minutes ago, Patrick Bateman said:

But back to that kiss..... I absolutely felt the same way you did.  It was stilted, forced, awkward and everything else.  But how awkward was it?  Ben and Rey are kissing cousins.  lol.  While not as incestual as Game of Thrones, there is an ironic feel to making Ben and Rey romantic.  Really quick summary, in the movies, Anakin is considered an immaculate conception and has no father, but in the comics (which are canon now), it is heavily inferred in a Vader vision/dream that Palpatine was responsible for manipulating the midchlorians in Shmi to create her eventual baby Ani.  There is also cut dialogue in the prequels of Palpatine telling Vader he had been waiting for him to eventually grow and come before him to take his place by his side as he is his father. 

So, from a certain point of view, Palpatine is actually Luke/Leia's grandfather, and therefore..... Ben's great grandfather.  In this movie, Sheev is introduced as Rey's grandfather making her father, Anakin's half brother, and Rey is Leia/Luke's cousin...... Ha, ha, ha.  Incestual, awkward, fucking weird kisses!  That's as Star Wars as you can get.  I guess since Sheev never plowed Shmi, it's not supposed to be an issue, but still funny to think about.  The Palpatines and Skywalkers can't get away from each other.

lukeleia.png

 

 

 

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From the beginning of the movie I felt like I missed the first 10 or 15 minutes. I’m not going to say the script was good or bad. Just unable to pull me into their world from the on set. Which is odd as I really like this shit. But for some reason I just couldn’t get into it, and started looking at my watch.

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2 hours ago, ulukinatme said:

I think we're supposed to glean that Palpatine used the force to save himself somehow.  It's a little hard to believe, but then again Maul survived getting cut in half in Phantom Menace and falling too.  

Ah, it all makes perfect sense once you realize that the dumb shit in this movie finds precedent in the dumb shit from another dumb movie.

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It was not good.  They just basically spent an entire movie retconning TLJ and it was a huge mistake.  Just full of fan service.

Y'all can hate TLJ all you want, but it told an actual well thought out story and took chances, introducing changes to the Star Wars universe that was interesting...this movie just destroyed all that because of a very vocal minority, while also trying to appease everyone, and in the end didn't appease anyone.

Very disappointed in JJ for how he finished this.  And I liked what he did with TFA.  If he had just done something similar to that I'd have been much happier.

 

Oh, and fuck mulletpelini and his Ewok loving ass.  Just knew they sneak those little bastards in somehow.

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2 minutes ago, Drew said:

It was not good.  They just basically spent an entire movie retconning TLJ and it was a huge mistake.  Just full of fan service.

Y'all can hate TLJ all you want, but it told an actual well thought out story and took chances, introducing changes to the Star Wars universe that was interesting...this movie just destroyed all that because of a very vocal minority, while also trying to appease everyone, and in the end didn't appease anyone.

Very disappointed in JJ for how he finished this.  And I liked what he did with TFA.  If he had just done something similar to that I'd have been much happier.

 

Oh, and fuck mulletpelini and his Ewok loving ass.  Just knew they sneak those little bastards in somehow.

Holy fucking shit!!

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4 minutes ago, Drew said:

It was not good.  They just basically spent an entire movie retconning TLJ and it was a huge mistake.  Just full of fan service.

Y'all can hate TLJ all you want, but it told an actual well thought out story and took chances, introducing changes to the Star Wars universe that was interesting...this movie just destroyed all that because of a very vocal minority, while also trying to appease everyone, and in the end didn't appease anyone.

Very disappointed in JJ for how he finished this.  And I liked what he did with TFA.  If he had just done something similar to that I'd have been much happier.

 

Oh, and fuck mulletpelini and his Ewok loving ass.  Just knew they sneak those little bastards in somehow.

tenor.gif?itemid=14571400

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Just now, Red Five said:

Holy fucking shit!!

I've always said I'll say if a movie isn't good. I just think Surly goes way overboard and overthinks movies way to much.

I still think TLJ was great, and if they had expanded on that and not shit all over it, we would have had a MUCH better close out.  Wish Rian Johnson had agreed to do the 3rd movie.

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