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HOA kicks out grandson after moving in with Grandparent's after his parents died.


crash_davis

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3 hours ago, AUS-97HORN said:

Its a terrible position for the kid to be in, and the HOA has to enforce their own rules or they get sued by the residents.

Well I mean people can sue for anything, but an HOA is not required to enforce every rule every time there's a violation unless there's specific language in their governing documents that says as much.

People have sued HOAs based on your theory in the above quote and the cases have been dismissed where such language did not exist.

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56 minutes ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

 

Follow the rules, and if you don't like them, move somewhere else. Now I would hope the HOA (or whatever this officially is) could give some leeway but there would need to be a deadline.

If you read the letter from the attorney, they flat out state that some of the residents are supportive of an exception but others are not.   So at that point the HOA Board doesn't have a choice or risk being sued.  So it's really a matter of fuck those residents that refuse to accommodate unique circumstances.  They should put the ringleader, because lord knows there is one, on blast.

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59 minutes ago, Cajun said:

She's not in Circle C, just near it.  Lives in the neighborhood directly behind the HEB on Slaughter and Escarpment.  I don't know the name of the neighborhood, however.  

I'll be rectifying that soon enough though.

 

 

I think that's the Village at Western Oaks. If so, their CCRs require trash to be put away by 9pm (not 5) on collection day. And their fines are no where near $2k. She would've had to ignore multiple notices and left her trash can at the street for a substantial amount of time. She's either not telling you something, or the HOA sent her the wrong notice.

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13 minutes ago, Yarbr said:

I mean, we pay $97 a year. It's not that bad.

Yes, but it is still annoying.

Years ago on a July 4th we were standing out front with a neighbor watching all the fireworks on the street, when he commented that “the HOA had sent out a letter reminding residents that fireworks were banned in the MUD”.

Mrs. Brat voiced the rhetorical question “I wonder who the asshole is who sent out that dumb letter?”

Neighbor replied, “I did”.

We were unaware he had recently been voted on the HOA committee. Lol

He took it in good stride, and remains a friend.

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26 minutes ago, BabaYaga said:

I'm with you about 99% of the time on this - of course when I go to try and sell my house and live next to a cancer survivor (god bless every one of them) who decides to paint their entire house bright pink.  I might take umbrage with things at times.  

The HOA in Frisco (Stonebriar CC) made the headlines for fining a guy for having a "truck" parked in the front of his house after hours - the intent, was of course a work-truck or something that might bother people.  His was a fancy enough truck (daily driver)...and this being Texas.  He told them suck all the dicks, and it got ugly and made the national news (I think, local for sure).

Yeah, I get that and maybe my view is a bit skewed because I grew up in a neighborhood where trash didn't wanna, or more to the point, couldn't (/humblebrag) reside.  People and their incessant need to control others is what bothers me.

I mean, it's not just HOA neighborhood either.  Fuck, I used to live in Tarrytown right near Exposition and Enfield.  One day I came off the lake and the Walsh Landing ramp was real busy, so instead of getting the boat all squared away before taking it back to Boat Town where I store it I parked on one of the side streets right next to O'Henry just to make sure everything was battened down and all the electrical was off.  Not in anyone's way, not blocking anything, nothing.  And it's not a junky, shit boat either.  Nice, clean Nautique.

Within maybe 3 minutes some fuck walking his dog along with his country club ho says, "Excuse me, this street was not for you to park your boat."  Once I realized he wasn't kidding I replied, "Yeah, it wasn't made for your to walk your dog down the middle of either, get on the sidewalk before you dole out your advice next time."

He didn't appreciate my response and his ho had that Mrs. Howell "Well, I never!!!" look on her bitch face.

Good times!

/csb

 

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2 minutes ago, SquishMitten said:

I think that's the Village at Western Oaks. If so, their CCRs require trash to be put away by 9pm (not 5) on collection day. And their fines are no where near $2k. She would've had to ignore multiple notices and left her trash can at the street for a substantial amount of time. She's either not telling you something, or the HOA sent her the wrong notice.

Yeah, I think you're right on the neighborhood.

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37 minutes ago, HouTex said:

I've never studied this area of the law, but if an exception is made here, can the HOA be forced to make other exceptions later?  Can they still be arbitrary in allowing exceptions to the deed restrictions?  What if two kids move in next door because their parents have moved across the country and they want to stay in the same high school for two more years until they graduate so they move in the G-parents?  They are normal, decent kids who have a few parties on weekends, like we did, and they bang their basketballs until 11:00 p.m. or so many evenings.  I can get where old people, who have been there and done that with their own kids, or never had kids, don't want to be bothered with teens nearby.  That said, if I were a resident there, I'm hoping I wouldn't be a dick about it.

I hear ya but when you start to make exceptions, who really gets to decide the exceptions. And every grandparents' grandkids are wonderful, quiet, studious kids.  My guess is that this community allows short term visits by under-18 or any visitor but obviously this is not the case here. It's a planned 3 year visit at minimum.

The grandparents agreed to this rules and presumably liked the rules when they moved in. Now because of a tragedy they don't want the rules to apply them. It sucks but we have laws and rules for a reason.

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11 minutes ago, jimmyjazz said:

There's no way "visits" aren't allowed.  Grandparents love grandkids.  So what's the HOA restriction on the allowable length of a visit?

I don't know, it probably varies by community, but I remember visiting my grandparents in Sun Lakes AZ.  My grandparents would have to notify [someone] that they would have family visiting, what all of our ages were, and what dates we would be there.  I remember being asked by strangers at the pool how long I was visiting. 

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2 minutes ago, miguelito said:

I don't know, it probably varies by community, but I remember visiting my grandparents in Sun Lakes AZ.  My grandparents would have to notify [someone] that they would have family visiting, what all of our ages were, and what dates we would be there.  I remember being asked by strangers at the pool how long I was visiting. 

Those people right there.

Fuck 'em.

Just fuck 'em.

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5 hours ago, Huckleberry said:

Fuck the HOA is the correct answer. HOAs have the ability to use discretion and not enforce a rule just like most places that are in charge of something. This is a situation where the clearly correct thing to do is to let it go.

Signed,
An HOA president who is an HOA president specifically to keep assclowns from being dicks

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The gated subdivision my mom lives in on Lake Palestine had a  teenage kid visiting for the summer at one of the residents. A security guard picked him up to take him to his grandparents home after spotting him just "walking around" late one evening. When the guard parked in his grandparent's driveway and got out to walk to the door, this kid slid over into the driver's seat and jacked the little compact security guard truck and took off. He actually left the subdivision, driving right past the security guard shack at the entrance/exit. They ended up having to call the real police who chased the kid down and had to throw out spike strips to stop him. /csb

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7 minutes ago, immortal13 said:

The gated subdivision my mom lives in on Lake Palestine had a  teenage kid visiting for the summer at one of the residents. A security guard picked him up to take him to his grandparents home after spotting him just "walking around" late one evening. When the guard parked in his grandparent's driveway and got out to walk to the door, this kid slid over into the driver's seat and jacked the little compact security guard truck and took off. He actually left the subdivision, driving right past the security guard shack at the entrance/exit. They ended up having to call the real police who chased the kid down and had to throw out spike strips to stop him. /csb

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3 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

There's no way "visits" aren't allowed.  Grandparents love grandkids.  So what's the HOA restriction on the allowable length of a visit?

At my in laws hood, it's something like 30 days  per year, not more than 10 consecutive days.  That's for minors,.or maybe  under 25.  Adults can stay more.  Exceptions are made for a spouse that is under 55.

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4 minutes ago, dingleberryswitzer said:

At my in laws hood, it's something like 30 days  per year, not more than 10 consecutive days.  That's for minors,.or maybe  under 25.  Adults can stay more.  Exceptions are made for a spouse that is under 55.

Well, yeah, because if Grandpa wants to spend his golden years and his nest egg on banging a 25 yr old gold-digger....who are we to judge. right?

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5 hours ago, miguelito said:

I don't know, it probably varies by community, but I remember visiting my grandparents in Sun Lakes AZ.  My grandparents would have to notify [someone] that they would have family visiting, what all of our ages were, and what dates we would be there.  I remember being asked by strangers at the pool how long I was visiting. 

MAybe a Speedo wasn’t appropriate swimwear ?

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8 hours ago, crash_davis said:

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Our first house had a ridiculous HOA. Right after we moved in we got a notice that the grass needed to be cut and a deadline by which it had to be done. Couple of days later, before the deadline, we got a certified letter from the HOA lawyers saying we were being fined for non-compliance. Besides the fact that they ignored their own deadline, the letter was riddled with spelling, punctuation, and grammar errors. I had a few rum and cokes, took out my red pen (editing is part of my day job) and marked up the letter, then mailed it back to them. We had a lot of run-ins with the HOA over the 11 years we lived there, but never heard anything else from them over that particular issue.

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10 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

Restrict the kid's community activities -- no use of the swimming pool and fitness center, no jitterbugging with the olds at the monthly dance, etc.  This isn't that difficult.  Try NOT being assholes for once.

 

What about Bingo?

Oh, and really a little Cheese Whiz would probably smooth all of this over...

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7 hours ago, dingleberryswitzer said:

At my in laws hood, it's something like 30 days  per year, not more than 10 consecutive days.  That's for minors,.or maybe  under 25.  Adults can stay more.  Exceptions are made for a spouse that is under 55.

This is similar to the one my in-laws recently moved into.  What amazes me is the houses are about 50% more than what you can find in an “all age?” hood.  It’s nice and all but for the money they spent, I’d of rather moved to a much more upscale hood where more than likely most of the residents are older anyhow. Guess you’d have to give up pickle ball and naked twister with your neighbors tho.   
 

@Cajun  I’m with you on a ton of things, but I can’t stand a trash can left out. Don’t know why, but that has always bothered the shit out of me. Obv $2000 for past 1700 is dumb af but speaking in general.  Trash cans and street parking kills me.  I am high strung sometimes tho.  I am not on HOA, have never snitched to HOA etc. But overall I’m glad we have it; not enough people take pride in their homes anymore to keep the up. Trash cans are not my concern, but legitimate letting things go.  

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20 hours ago, Huckleberry said:

Fuck the HOA is the correct answer. HOAs have the ability to use discretion and not enforce a rule just like most places that are in charge of something. This is a situation where the clearly correct thing to do is to let it go.

Signed,
An HOA president who is an HOA president specifically to keep assclowns from being dicks

You being an HOA president is the most @Huckleberry thing ever.

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21 hours ago, AUS-97HORN said:

Those 55+ communities have some really iron-clad verbage in their HOA agreement, The olds pay extra for the idea of not having to deal with kids on their lawn.

 

Yep.  The kids will be spreading their gravel around and knocking over their cactus plants.  

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The HOA is put into a tough position because from all accounts, he’s a good kid who fell into a tough tragedy.  But what happens when the next grandparent has a different tragedy with their grandkid?  Or even with their adult child. It’s not difficult to find families that have struggles. 

and from my understanding he moved in 12-13 months ago so the HOA didn’t act on Day 10 to kick him out.  The grandparents have been letting this this problem hang on for some time. And when you ignore or fail to deal with a problem, it eventually comes back to haunt you.

my guess is that the bad pr will work to allow him to stay there. 

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7 hours ago, fattyflattie said:

 

@Cajun  I’m with you on a ton of things, but I can’t stand a trash can left out. Don’t know why, but that has always bothered the shit out of me. Obv $2000 for past 1700 is dumb af but speaking in general.  Trash cans and street parking kills me.  I am high strung sometimes tho.  I am not on HOA, have never snitched to HOA etc. But overall I’m glad we have it; not enough people take pride in their homes anymore to keep the up. Trash cans are not my concern, but legitimate letting things go.  

I would say I am in the middle. I don't get ramped up if a trash can is out for an extra day. Things happen. Day after day in the street can create escalating issues: the can blows over, trash blows down the street, makes it difficult for traffic to proceed, etc. If someone finds it convenient to place it by the side of their house I'm not going to raise a stink about that either, even if it is visible when one drives by. My neighbor is older and moving the large can is hard for her. Sometimes I do it, but if I'm not around I'm not getting pissy about her trying to save some steps. It beats coming home to find her lying on the driveway trying to satisfy someone's idea of an orderly society. We don't have an HOA though so no problem there.

As far as letting things go, there are some folks out there that do that, but I think it's complicated and not everyone is on the same page. For example, there can be quite a few reasons for not keeping up with the Bouquets. Getting to know your neighbors is helpful. Some neighbors are easier to get along and go along with sure, but we had a string of six homes painted on our small street last summer because we got to talking about painters one day. A next door and I were having a conversation in the yard and another neighbor drove by and rolled down the window and before you know it, a local crew had a pretty easy couple of weeks painting one house after another. Another neighbor takes care of her elderly mother and is too busy to go buy the flowers she loves so I give her my extra seedlings already potted up and ready to transplant on her day off. It's not all sunshine and roses, but we get along and go along in our neighborhood. At least for now.

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23 minutes ago, Longhorn said:

What is the legal basis again for 55+ only communities? Age discrimination doesn’t override?  
 

Under whatever the provision is that allows this, could someone doe the reverse? Communities only for age 35 and under? Or only Asians? Etc...

My understanding is that age discrimination only applies to protecting people 40+ and only in the workplace. That said, I understand your point. Apparently, there are covenants still out there that forbid African Americans from living in certain neighborhoods, but those are no longer enforceable in this day and age.

What I truly don't understand is the attitude of those who actually choose to live in a 55+ "community" (scare quotes intentional). Call it what is: a fuck-you-I-no-longer-want-to-be-a-part-of-this-world dystopia for miserable misanthropes.

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28 minutes ago, Longhorn said:

What is the legal basis again for 55+ only communities? Age discrimination doesn’t override?  
 

Under whatever the provision is that allows this, could someone doe the reverse? Communities only for age 35 and under? Or only Asians? Etc...

Youth isn’t a protected class. Deed restriction when project was developed in order to sustain the value of 55+ to purchasers.  Argument would be “Hey, I paid a premium to live with no kids.  I expect to enjoy that premium as long as I own the property.  The deed restriction protects my right to do that.”

I’ve had to do the deed restrictions sometimes to avoid paying enormous school impact fees for senior housing deals.  

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My mother in law lives in a senior apartment complex.  Same basic notion as these housing communities.  There are activities, buses/rides to the store and to doctors appointments, and meal service available.

It rents only to 55+ and, as a result, is considerably quieter and better maintained than your average apartment complex because there aren't kids (both the juvenile and adult variety) running around 24/7.  There's almost zero crime and vandalism.  There are no all night beer bashes around the pool. No one "bumps the bass" all day and night. There are no screaming fights and police calls for domestic disturbances.  They play cards and board games in the clubhouse and tend to be more neighborly than "all-ages" apartment complexes.  A lot of the people are on walkers and wheelchairs and even the scooter things.  There are elevators to the upper floors that people don't piss in.

The rent is a bit higher than a comparable normal apartment complex.

21 minutes ago, bolverk said:

What I truly don't understand is the attitude of those who actually choose to live in a 55+ "community" (scare quotes intentional). Call it what is: a fuck-you-I-no-longer-want-to-be-a-part-of-this-world dystopia for miserable misanthropes.

This is bullshit.  If you can't understand the desire for peace and quiet in your golden years, and a more neighborly and active existence for those with somewhat limited mobility, well then I can't help you.  Before this, mother-in-law lived alone in her house in a neighborhood that was quickly becoming younger and rowdier.  Her neighbors were dying off or moving away to apartment complexes like hers or assisted living or nursing homes.  She was becoming increasingly isolated.  Her new neighbors were mostly nice enough, but they had zero in common.

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13 minutes ago, Upgrayedd said:

Youth isn’t a protected class. Deed restriction when project was developed in order to sustain the value of 55+ to purchasers.  Argument would be “Hey, I paid a premium to live with no kids.  I expect to enjoy that premium as long as I own the property.  The deed restriction protects my right to do that.”

I’ve had to do the deed restrictions sometimes to avoid paying enormous school impact fees for senior housing deals.  

Understood on Youth and class.  Let me restate the example....

 

Jewish only community, Veteran only or Asian only community with HOA authority to legally keep all others out?  
 

Is the hurdle for designation simply, a protected class and a group of “I’ll pay a premium to only live with those of Jewish faith” people to establish this type of community?  
 

Seems like there has to be more to the equation.

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13 minutes ago, Upgrayedd said:

Youth isn’t a protected class. Deed restriction when project was developed in order to sustain the value of 55+ to purchasers.  Argument would be “Hey, I paid a premium to live with no kids.  I expect to enjoy that premium as long as I own the property.  The deed restriction protects my right to do that.”

I’ve had to do the deed restrictions sometimes to avoid paying enormous school impact fees for senior housing deals.  

In some cases, senior housing comes with tax advantages for the developer/owner and has income restrictions.

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7 minutes ago, Longhorn said:

Understood on Youth and class.  Let me restate the example....

 

Jewish only community, Veteran only or Asian only community with HOA authority to legally keep all others out?  
 

Is the hurdle for designation simply, a protected class and a group of “I’ll pay a premium to only live with those of Jewish faith” people to establish this type of community?  
 

Seems like there has to be more to the equation.

There's not really.  Discrimination remains essentially legal except for protected classes.

No protected class, no worries about discrimination.

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55 minutes ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

The HOA is put into a tough position because from all accounts, he’s a good kid who fell into a tough tragedy.  But what happens when the next grandparent has a different tragedy with their grandkid?  Or even with their adult child. It’s not difficult to find families that have struggles. 

and from my understanding he moved in 12-13 months ago so the HOA didn’t act on Day 10 to kick him out.  The grandparents have been letting this this problem hang on for some time. And when you ignore or fail to deal with a problem, it eventually comes back to haunt you.

my guess is that the bad pr will work to allow him to stay there. 

Damn that’s harsh on the kid.  Unless you offed his parents and want to finish the job. Calm down Joe Chill. 

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21 hours ago, crash_davis said:

Ewe, not you just put visions of wrinkly old genitalia with discharges in my mind.  I did not need that visual before my chicken fried steak (with country gravy) lunch.  

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1 hour ago, TwiceHorn said:

My mother in law lives in a senior apartment complex.  Same basic notion as these housing communities.  There are activities, buses/rides to the store and to doctors appointments, and meal service available.

It rents only to 55+ and, as a result, is considerably quieter and better maintained than your average apartment complex because there aren't kids (both the juvenile and adult variety) running around 24/7.  There's almost zero crime and vandalism.  There are no all night beer bashes around the pool. No one "bumps the bass" all day and night. There are no screaming fights and police calls for domestic disturbances.  They play cards and board games in the clubhouse and tend to be more neighborly than "all-ages" apartment complexes.  A lot of the people are on walkers and wheelchairs and even the scooter things.  There are elevators to the upper floors that people don't piss in.

The rent is a bit higher than a comparable normal apartment complex.

This is bullshit.  If you can't understand the desire for peace and quiet in your golden years, and a more neighborly and active existence for those with somewhat limited mobility, well then I can't help you.  Before this, mother-in-law lived alone in her house in a neighborhood that was quickly becoming younger and rowdier.  Her neighbors were dying off or moving away to apartment complexes like hers or assisted living or nursing homes.  She was becoming increasingly isolated.  Her new neighbors were mostly nice enough, but they had zero in common.

I'm going to disagree with you there. What you're describing is something akin to an assisted living facility or one step below - it's based on need. What I'm criticizing are those exclusive escapist enclaves such as the Villages or Sun City where they've essentially created new towns for the sole purpose of getting away from "those people." It's legal, but it reflects poorly on the attitudes of those who choose to live in such an environment.

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1 hour ago, Js1 said:

Damn that’s harsh on the kid.  Unless you offed his parents and want to finish the job. Calm down Joe Chill. 

huh?  the problem is that the grandparents didn't get this resolved by now. Most likely the rules state that their grandson couldn't visit them for more than 10, 20 or 30 days.  350+ days later they take the story to the press.  I wasn't calling their grandson the problem.  

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2 hours ago, TwiceHorn said:

There are no all night beer bashes around the pool. No one "bumps the bass" all day and night. There are no screaming fights and police calls for domestic disturbances.  They play cards and board games in the clubhouse and tend to be more neighborly than "all-ages" apartment complexes.  A lot of the people are on walkers and wheelchairs and even the scooter things.  There are elevators to the upper floors that people don't piss in.

Sounds shitty

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52 minutes ago, bolverk said:

I'm going to disagree with you there. What you're describing is something akin to an assisted living facility or one step below - it's based on need. What I'm criticizing are those exclusive escapist enclaves such as the Villages or Sun City where they've essentially created new towns for the sole purpose of getting away from "those people." It's legal, but it reflects poorly on the attitudes of those who choose to live in such an environment.

Maybe that's a different deal.  Where she is is not based on need, she's pretty fully able-bodied and compos mentis.  Many or most of those who aren't have "aged in place," which I think is a big aspect of these 55+ places:  that it's there if you need it.  I don't really see it as an elitist thing.  Maybe some are.

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22 minutes ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

huh?  the problem is that the grandparents didn't get this resolved by now. Most likely the rules state that their grandson couldn't visit them for more than 10, 20 or 30 days.  350+ days later they take the story to the press.  I wasn't calling their grandson the problem.  

It was a joke. Relax, Gladys 

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