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Sark after dark COACHING STAFF thread


closetohumping

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2 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

Get the fuck out of here with that shit. Is she trashy? Hell, yes. Is she a woman of low moral fiber? Clearly. Is she nuttier than a shithouse rat? No doubt. She's also hot in her own way. What's not to like if you're heterosexual? Are you the dude that goes to the strip club and then looks down your nose at every woman that comes by the table? Those guys do nothing but fuck up everyone else's time and irritate their friends. 

I've met plenty of you fuckers from the Internet over the last 20+ years. The bullshit many of you throw out there pertaining to what you would and wouldn't hit is outright absurd. 

you aren't assuming the internet is real life?

of course he'd hit it...for about 1 minute.

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Probably in the minority here but.....I'm just gonna say if the ole hot wife/significant other thing about coaches ability to recruit is at all accurate........Banks must be an awesome bag man because she doesn't inspire me on his recruiting skills.....bleh

Surly’s thirst is unrivaled. Half this site would fuck Banks’s pet monkey.
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3 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

Get the fuck out of here with that shit. Is she trashy? Hell, yes. Is she a woman of low moral fiber? Clearly. Is she nuttier than a shithouse rat? No doubt. She's also hot in her own way. What's not to like if you're heterosexual? Are you the dude that goes to the strip club and then looks down your nose at every woman that comes by the table? Those guys do nothing but fuck up everyone else's time and irritate their friends. 

I've met plenty of you fuckers from the Internet over the last 20+ years. The bullshit many of you throw out there pertaining to what you would and wouldn't hit is outright absurd. 

No....I don't go to strip clubs period. So guess I'm not in her demographic.  Sorry I find her neither hot nor attractive.  I haven't looked at her page but just going by what is posted on here.  Women do what they do for a living and why would I look down on her for that?  I just don't find her attractive.

 

 

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6 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

 

I've met plenty of you fuckers from the Internet over the last 20+ years. The bullshit many of you throw out there pertaining to what you would and wouldn't hit is outright absurd. 

I will completely agree with that statement though.

 

I am not claiming I only bang 10s or she isn't hot enough for me. I just don't find her attractive.

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11 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

Get the fuck out of here with that shit. Is she trashy? Hell, yes. Is she a woman of low moral fiber? Clearly. Is she nuttier than a shithouse rat? No doubt. She's also hot in her own way. What's not to like if you're heterosexual? Are you the dude that goes to the strip club and then looks down your nose at every woman that comes by the table? Those guys do nothing but fuck up everyone else's time and irritate their friends. 

I've met plenty of you fuckers from the Internet over the last 20+ years. The bullshit many of you throw out there pertaining to what you would and wouldn't hit is outright absurd. 

Hit it and put a ring on it are different. Especially if you have a public job.

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2 minutes ago, TexasRenegade said:

No....I don't go to strip clubs period. So guess I'm not in her demographic.  Sorry I find her neither hot nor attractive.  I haven't looked at her page but just going by what is posted on here.  Women do what they do for a living and why would I look down on her for that?  I just don't find her attractive.

You are no TexasRenegade, sir. You should change your handle to TexasChoirboy. Maybe TexasGeezer. Not sure. There are a few options, I guess.

 

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No....I don't go to strip clubs period. So guess I'm not in her demographic.  Sorry I find her neither hot nor attractive.  I haven't looked at her page but just going by what is posted on here.  Women do what they do for a living and why would I look down on her for that?  I just don't find her attractive.
 
 
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17 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

I've met plenty of you fuckers from the Internet over the last 20+ years. The bullshit many of you throw out there pertaining to what you would and wouldn't hit is outright absurd. 

We’re not all 5’7” with a man bun either. Some of us can afford to have higher standards. 

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50 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

I was irritated with the Herman hire because I was fantasizing about hiring, wait for it, Justin Fuente.

Respect for the honesty. I went through an old group chat I have with some friends the other day and before we hired Herman I was hoping we were going to money-whip Chip Kelly. 

Edited by UncleSonny
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16 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

You are no TexasRenegade, sir. You should change your handle to TexasChoirboy. Maybe TexasGeezer. Not sure. There are a few options, I guess.

 

The term renegade has nothing to do with behavior...my name is certainly not some claim that I live some crazy lifestyle.  It has a meaning and a reason but nothing to do with any of that.

 

Though I guess I do betray the principles of many who post on Surly so there you go....

 

5 minutes ago, Wulaw Horn said:

I’m not even a boob man- which is a shame bc my wife has a huge rack- but those boobs are so spectacular that it overrules everything else about that package and makes it a must bang. Seriously, they are spectacular. 

Putting a ring on someone else's finger pretty much ends the entirety of the idea of a must bang.

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5 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Here we go again. When we all meet up before the Louisiana game for the Surly Sprint-off, bring your measuring tape, salon shears and your significant other. After you dust me in the forty, I'll let you cut my man bun off, and then take a photo of you standing tall over my tiny frame with my hideous woman and your smoking hot lady friend, and you can post the photo on Surly and have me mocked forever.

"That GRHorn," they'll say, "he's an American bad ass."

"Yeah, and who knew that closetojumping was Danny Devito in real life? Didn't see that one coming."

 

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1 minute ago, rpspeed said:

as someone who has skipped pages here and there, who is poleassassin and other than surly fuckery, any reason we should care?

She's Monkey Gia's friend.  And yes, you should care, because they are likely the new Co-DCs.

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6 minutes ago, rpspeed said:

as someone who has skipped pages here and there, who is poleassassin and other than surly fuckery, any reason we should care?

tenor.gif

Just kidding, she's Jeff Banks' ladyfriend apparently. Jeff Banks who's almost for sure not coming, but it would be pretty cool if he did.

Edited by UncleSonny
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19 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Here we go again. When we all meet up before the Louisiana game for the Surly Sprint-off, bring your measuring tape, salon shears and your significant other. After you dust me in the forty, I'll let you cut my man bun off, and then take a photo of you standing tall over my tiny frame with my hideous woman and your smoking hot lady friend, and you can post the photo on Surly and have me mocked forever.

"That GRHorn," they'll say, "he's an American bad ass."

"Yeah, and who knew that closetojumping was Danny Devito in real life? Didn't see that one coming."

Does waddling like a penguin even count as running? 

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