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2021 Texas Offseason: Sark Attacks Austin


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It was 45 minutes of utterly incompetent football, 12 minutes of a brilliant rally, and 3 minutes of letdown. The halftime score was 22-6 Tech, as Texas had rallied to kick 2 FGs in the last 5:30 of the 1st half. We stopped the opening drive of the 2nd half, returned the punt for a TD, then Colt McCoy promptly threw a pick 6.
There's plenty to dissect over that last drive. However, we sucked goat arse for most of that game. With a trip to the MNC on the plate, we failed mentally.

Slorchy can come along and say how it’s never a game if the block in the back (borderline) is called. Except here’s one to ponder. What if we score in say about a minute anyway?

But I wanted to comment on the horseshit holding call on Ulatoski on the play prior to the pick 6. It changed the play sequence in that series. I believe the only holding call of the game and we got it. Make no mistake that 2008 was the Big 12s worst overlooking holding. OU and Tech benefitted far greater than anyone else. Same shitbird was the head official in both games. Not only were they not calling holding but at least twice their pass blocking consisted of not just grabbing the face mask but an extended pull that ain’t even a judgmental call.

Yeah 2008 still is a kick to the groin.
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Slorchy can come along and say how it’s never a game if the block in the back (borderline) is called. Except here’s one to ponder. What if we score in say about a minute anyway?

But I wanted to comment on the horseshit holding call on Ulatoski on the play prior to the pick 6. It changed the play sequence in that series. I believe the only holding call of the game and we got it. Make no mistake that 2008 was the Big 12s worst overlooking holding. OU and Tech benefitted far greater than anyone else. Same shitbird was the head official in both games. Not only were they not calling holding but at least twice their pass blocking consisted of not just grabbing the face mask but an extended pull that ain’t even a judgmental call.

Yeah 2008 still is a kick to the groin.

Was that the holding on Rak? Also I think that douche for tech with all the face paint was there about then as well.
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Was that the holding on Rak? Also I think that douche for tech with all the face paint was there about then as well.

Rylan Reed was the dude molesting Orakpo all night.

One of the plays was Orakpo with an armed wrapped around his neck, but it was Kindle that was damn near pulled down by the face mask. If you missed one, you certainly got the other. But nope. Then it was later stopping Roy Miller, maybe L. Houston, on what would have been a nice pressure on Graham.

Carter I think was captain face paint and spiked out hair. I do think he was a participant in the shenanigans.
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I really wanted Strong to succeed. But it was obvious to anyone paying attention that he was in over his head. He didn't have a knack for details or strategy, and a piss poor staff sealed his fate from day one.

I really wanted Herman to succeed. But it was obvious to anyone paying attention that he was in over his head. Too many fucking gimmicks (piss color, really?), and a piss poor staff sealed his fate from day one.

Sark carries himself differently. He seems comfortable with the challenge. He has a really good staff, probably the best staff Texas has had since I don't know when. It's not great but it won't guarantee his doom like the previous two idiots. I have a Bob Stoops feeling about this. Dick sucker took a shitty coached Blake team and won a NC in his second year. No way I'm expecting Sark to do that but I think we have the talent. We just need the coaching. Sark and Pete can provide the schemes and coaching on O and D that we haven't seen in a long ass time.

Show me a loss.

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Rylan Reed was the dude molesting Orakpo all night.

One of the plays was Orakpo with an armed wrapped around his neck, but it was Kindle that was damn near pulled down by the face mask. If you missed one, you certainly got the other. But nope. Then it was later stopping Roy Miller, maybe L. Houston, on what would have been a nice pressure on Graham.

Carter I think was captain face paint and spiked out hair. I do think he was a participant in the shenanigans.

Yep Carter was his name. I think I remember he tried wrestling or mma later.
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7 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Nice, Greg….now call to action some loose NIL rules so Texas isn’t getting ass fucked by other states you fucking paraplegic dipshit. 

It's obvious you have no family members or friends with physical disabilities or you wouldn't be saying that.

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19 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Oh you’re right I should have just referred to him as governor hot wheels. 

This is what perpetually comes to mind for me. 

Fail wheelchair GIF - Find on GIFER

Yes, I'm fully aware I'm going to hell. But then again everyone on Surly is hell bound.

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33 minutes ago, UDontKnow said:

This is what perpetually comes to mind for me. 

Fail wheelchair GIF - Find on GIFER

Yes, I'm fully aware I'm going to hell. But then again everyone on Surly is hell bound.

He's already paralyzed from the waste down. From the neck down ain't gonna suck any worse. It's not like he's going to fuck fewer women than before.

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Can we change the title of this thread to “Imma post why my pussy still hurts from shit that happened 20 years ago”
Fuck Chuckles Gideon Crabtree Geiggar fucking kickers named Rose the other Roy Williams clock management Derrick Dorris erotic asphyxiation Faurot Field ACLs special team disasters Watson midget running backs Patterson Rout 66s Apple turnover Keontay’s handles 4 yard outs with 10 to go Mormon QBs Big 12 refs bags of dicks bad angles sweaty fat purple coaches Perrilloux shoulder injuries in MNCs Chris Jessie burnt toast and runny eggs the TE position Manny _iaz halftime tweets 
Think you missed a few things (fatdog watching soaps instead of players lifting, ex QB co-OC's getting blowies from training staff among others) but I'll allow it.
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8 hours ago, BurntOrange&White said:

Nice, Greg….now call to action some loose NIL rules so Texas isn’t getting ass fucked by other states you fucking paraplegic dipshit. 

 

8 hours ago, Born Burnt said:

It's obvious you have no family members or friends with physical disabilities or you wouldn't be saying that.

 

He is a paraplegic- truth

he is a dip shit- truth

whats the issue???

Would “ Rolling Homophobe”  be a better wordisum for him???

Edited by TexasTroll
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Bleacher Report released their preseason top 25, and they have the Longhorns ranked at a modest No. 16 in the nation.

16. Texas Longhorns

If you trust Steve Sarkisian to put Casey Thompson or Hudson Card in the best position to succeed and believe a veteran secondary can finally put it together, Texas isn't ranked high enough. If you see a new coach with a first-year quarterback and a defense that won't be as strong collectively as the talent is individually, the Longhorns are ranked too high. Simply making the Big 12 Championship Game would be a win for Sark in year one. 

 

https://bleacherreport.com/articles/2946102-projecting-college-football-preseason-top-25-at-the-start-of-fall-camp

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1 hour ago, LTtxfan said:

Bleacher Report released their preseason top 25, and they have the Longhorns ranked at a modest No. 16 in the nation.

16. Texas Longhorns

If you trust Steve Sarkisian to put Casey Thompson or Hudson Card in the best position to succeed and believe a veteran secondary can finally put it together, Texas isn't ranked high enough. If you see a new coach with a first-year quarterback and a defense that won't be as strong collectively as the talent is individually, the Longhorns are ranked too high. Simply making the Big 12 Championship Game would be a win for Sark in year one. 

 

https://bleacherreport.com/articles/2946102-projecting-college-football-preseason-top-25-at-the-start-of-fall-camp

Fuck BleacherReport

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1 hour ago, LTtxfan said:

Bleacher Report released their preseason top 25, and they have the Longhorns ranked at a modest No. 16 in the nation.

16. Texas Longhorns

If you trust Steve Sarkisian to put Casey Thompson or Hudson Card in the best position to succeed and believe a veteran secondary can finally put it together, Texas isn't ranked high enough. If you see a new coach with a first-year quarterback and a defense that won't be as strong collectively as the talent is individually, the Longhorns are ranked too high. Simply making the Big 12 Championship Game would be a win for Sark in year one. 

 

https://bleacherreport.com/articles/2946102-projecting-college-football-preseason-top-25-at-the-start-of-fall-camp

16 seems about right until you look at the teams in front of us.

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