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Great Honky Tonk Opening Lines


MaybeACoordinator

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Thousands upon thousands of great ones but right now this one is in pole position for me:

"Last night, I broke the seal on a Jim Beam decanter /
That looks like Elvis
" -- George Jones, "The King Is Gone (And So Are You)"

And it goes on to say...

"I soaked the label off a Flintstone Jelly Bean jar
I cleared us off a place on that
One little table that you left us
And pulled me up a big ole piece of floor

I pulled the head off Elvis
Filled Fred up to his pelvis
Yabba Dabba Doo, the King is gone
And so are you
"

Now that is how you honky tonk. Supposedly the Possum got sued by Elvis Inc and Hanna Barbera over those lyrics, but..

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Been my friends all day
It's no good I'm still lonely
Seems that I just can't forget
My one and only
So there's just one thing left to do
If I intend to sleep tonight
Put the bottle on the bar
And let me do it up right

Please put the bottle on the bar
Where I can pet it
And take my address down
Before I forget it

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The morning sun made its way
Through the wind shield of my Chevrolet
Whiskey eyes and ashtray breath
On a chert rock gravel road
What the hell did I do last night
That's the story of my life
Like tryin' to remember words
To a song nobody wrote

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Not opening lines but fuck it

Well, I rolled into Atlanta, drunk* and almost out of gas
Yeah, I had to get some money, lately I'd learned how to get it fast
Those neon lights was calling me and somehow I just had to get downtown
So I reached into the glove box, another liquor store went down

 

*This is how he sang it live. For radio, it was "stolen tags and almost out of gas."

Edited by MaybeACoordinator
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Spent my lifetime wishing the waitress would come around

telling jokes, shooting pool on the other side of town

when the whistle blows at 5 o’clock there’s only one place I’ll be found

down at ernies ice house lifting long necks, to that good ol country sound

talking bout the good old times, bragging about how it used to be

But I’ve worn out the same old lines and now it seems nothings news to me

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On a Greyhound bus Lord I'm travelin' this morning
I'm goin' to Shreveport and down to New Orleans
Been travlin' these highways and doin' things my way
It's been making me lonesome on'ry and mean.

God her hair was jet black and her name was Bodine
Thought she was the queen of the Basin Street Queens
She got tired of that smoky-wine dream
She began to feel lonesome on'ry and mean.

We got together and we cashed in our sweeps
Gave onto beggar who was mumblin' through the streets
There's no escaping from his snowy white dream
On'ry and lonesome on'ry and mean.

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7 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Stage-right enter Jimmy, just a counterfeit James Dean, with a pocket full of delta blues and cheap amphetamine. 

I thought it better not to talk about the letter that you sent.  It was no one else's business.  It was barely even mine.

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Well I've never seen you look quite so sad,
And I've never felt me feel quite so bad,
And I know we both feel that we have been had,
Well I guess they were just not that strong.

So I lost my woman and you lost your man,
And who knows who's right or who's wrong,
But I've got my guitar and I've got a plan,
Throw your arms 'round this honky tonk man!

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21 hours ago, hullabelew said:

Hello walls,
How'd things go for you today?
Don't you miss her
Since she up and walked away?

 

And probably not Honky Tonk, but cuts to the fucking point.  

Honey, don't you be yelling at me when I'm cleaning my gun

That's my favorite opening line of all time.  Hell, that whole song.  I fucking know those people.  

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You wouldn't read my letter if I wrote you
You asked me not to call you on the phone
But there's something I'm wanting to tell you
So I wrote it in the words of this song
I didn't know God made Honky Tonk angels
I might have known you'd never make a wife
You gave up the only one that ever loved you
And went back to the wild side of life
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