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Evangelical Christians


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4 hours ago, F250 said:

I mostly agree yet there are millions that identify as Evangelical and also happen to make up a significant political wing in our system. Religious Evangelicals are loosely defined but I don't think that is the case for Political Evangelicals.

Some similar foundational thoughts, though... A lot of energy spent happily telling others the good news of how wrong they are. 

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  • 1 month later...

The only good response is this: "The only exception I can take to your correspondence is your characterization of my fuck-sessions with your minx of a daughter as "brief pleasure."  While I was young, and perhaps not as skilled in the art of lasting a good while, my youth also allowed me to have multiple sexual encounters with your daughter in quick succession.  Which I did.  A lot.  So, please retract that portion of your letter, as its falseness is defamatory to my sexual reputation."

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Honestly in 2020  politically there are ZERO Christians that are Evangelical. 

That does not mean there are not a TON of Evangelicals politically... that pretend they are Christian. 

Edited by horn4life
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Can we just stop and marvel for a minute that at the same time the Pope is saying that people don't have to go to Church and can practice a "spiritual communion" at home, American evangelicals are rejecting the "priesthood of believers" and saying that you need to go to church for a pastor's intercession with God.

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7 minutes ago, Ghost of LL said:

Can we just stop and marvel for a minute that at the same time the Pope is saying that people don't have to go to Church and can practice a "spiritual communion" at home, American evangelicals are rejecting the "priesthood of believers" and saying that you need to go to church for a pastor's intercession with God.

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12 minutes ago, Ghost of LL said:

Can we just stop and marvel for a minute that at the same time the Pope is saying that people don't have to go to Church and can practice a "spiritual communion" at home, American evangelicals are rejecting the "priesthood of believers" and saying that you need to go to church for a pastor's intercession with God.

What is a spiritual communion?

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2 hours ago, TommyGufano said:

 

Stern sentence. But fair

Only thing you can do is write back and say, "Oh you cranky Baptist, you're just upset 'cause I face-fucked your daughter while thinking about your wife.  Go to hell"  

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5 minutes ago, workswithseed said:

I think every time the gf gives me head. I'll tell her that's she's receiving a spiritual communion now and forever.

No pics.

 

I've used a similar phrasing but I am pretty sure I just ripped off some Depeche Mode lyrics.

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18 hours ago, TommyGufano said:

 

Stern sentence. But fair

I like the scripture footnotes at the end. Also, dude sounds a little rapey. But also very solid metal lyrics interspersed in there too:
"However, I will tell you that my wrath against you is so great that to kill you by prolonged and extreme torture followed by the thorough desecration of your corpse would not be enough to extinguish my anger."

beavis and butthead headbang GIF

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21 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

The only good response is this: "The only exception I can take to your correspondence is your characterization of my fuck-sessions with your minx of a daughter as "brief pleasure."  While I was young, and perhaps not as skilled in the art of lasting a good while, my youth also allowed me to have multiple sexual encounters with your daughter in quick succession.  Which I did.  A lot.  So, please retract that portion of your letter, as its falseness is defamatory to my sexual reputation."

Nah, a better approach would be to tell the father that his daughter seduced him, first by a handjob then when she exposed he supple breasts, his will power to resist declined rapidly as his manhood stood erect.  He tried to resist but she moved her face slowly to his pelvic region and unzipped his pants, pulled out his engorged penis and she began sucking on his dick with constant pressure while squeezing the base of his dick with one hand and cupping his testicles with the other.  At that point all of his willpower exploded into his daughters mouths and then as she kept sucking harder and more forcefully, his primal instincts took over and he inserted his penis into the daughter and felt the temple walls of flesh.   He was ashamed of what happened and while he cared for her, he felt cheated out of his virginity.   But at the same time, this set him upon a path of lust could not be satisfied and he went on a tear.    If anything he should be repaying the ex boyfriend with 2 horse and a 6 pigs, 3 goats plus the damage that it did to families of other women who also slept with him.   Her vagina tore him away from Christ's path, and only his lovely new wife was able to restore him to God's grace.  He forgave his daughter for her transgressions, but her parents should have known what they were raising. 

 

 

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On 5/29/2020 at 3:09 PM, Nivek said:

Nah, a better approach would be to tell the father that his daughter seduced him, first by a handjob then when she exposed he supple breasts, his will power to resist declined rapidly as his manhood stood erect.  He tried to resist but she moved her face slowly to his pelvic region and unzipped his pants, pulled out his engorged penis and she began sucking on his dick with constant pressure while squeezing the base of his dick with one hand and cupping his testicles with the other.  At that point all of his willpower exploded into his daughters mouths and then as she kept sucking harder and more forcefully, his primal instincts took over and he inserted his penis into the daughter and felt the temple walls of flesh.   He was ashamed of what happened and while he cared for her, he felt cheated out of his virginity.   But at the same time, this set him upon a path of lust could not be satisfied and he went on a tear.    If anything he should be repaying the ex boyfriend with 2 horse and a 6 pigs, 3 goats plus the damage that it did to families of other women who also slept with him.   Her vagina tore him away from Christ's path, and only his lovely new wife was able to restore him to God's grace.  He forgave his daughter for her transgressions, but her parents should have known what they were raising. 

 

 

Nah.  He tired to forgive, but could not, so a Hummer from Minx's mom is the only appropriate Biblical response.  "Eye for an eye, dick suck for a dick suck."

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So my terminally ill aunt, asked my mom to vote for Trump.  My mom reported back that she basically listens to Rush, Hannity, and Fox all day long.   My dad is still trying to defend Trump and my mom is wondering how my father can still excuse away his stupidity and graft.    She has basically come to the realization he joined a cult.  

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24 minutes ago, Nivek said:

So my terminally ill aunt, asked my mom to vote for Trump.  My mom reported back that she basically listens to Rush, Hannity, and Fox all day long.   My dad is still trying to defend Trump and my mom is wondering how my father can still excuse away his stupidity and graft.    She has basically come to the realization he joined a cult.  

She should have said she was voting for Biden, and also paying ten Messicans to illegally vote with ID she got from George Soros.   Think of the decreased medical expenses.

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So my terminally ill aunt, asked my mom to vote for Trump.  My mom reported back that she basically listens to Rush, Hannity, and Fox all day long.   My dad is still trying to defend Trump and my mom is wondering how my father can still excuse away his stupidity and graft.    She has basically come to the realization he joined a cult.  

I was thinking about how selfish it is for people like Mitch McConnell to adopt a strategy of appointing young judges so they can control politics from fucking beyond the grave. Wicked, vile men.

Not saying your aunt is evil, but maybe let the next generation do their thing.


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23 hours ago, TwiceHorn said:

What a time we live in when deathbed wishes are "vote for x."

Sweet fancy moses.

They are in a normalized cult. 

23 hours ago, Gatorubet said:

She should have said she was voting for Biden, and also paying ten Messicans to illegally vote with ID she got from George Soros.   Think of the decreased medical expenses.

Good advice.  Sad part, is that my dying aunt is my mom's last remaining sane sibling.  One's mind is gone due to Alzheimer's and the other is even more crazy.  

20 hours ago, Grandioso said:


I was thinking about how selfish it is for people like Mitch McConnell to adopt a strategy of appointing young judges so they can control politics from fucking beyond the grave. Wicked, vile men.

Not saying your aunt is evil, but maybe let the next generation do their thing.


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That is exactly their aim.  I used to believe that both parties had similar goals but different aims to achieve them.    It became apparent that I was wrong a long time ago. 

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I used to be an Evangelical (20 years ago).  I owned half a dozen bibles, read all of them, some marked up forwards and backwards.  not once did I ever refer to one of them as "a" Bible.  They were "mine" and the "mine" was as possessive of an adjective as any could be.  It's a subtle distinction -- "a" versus "mine" clutched with everything you have.  Truth be known at that time, the only thing I cared about in my possession were my Bibles.  Our President is the quintessential hypocrite.  He held "a" Bible, and didn't even open that Bible up as he spoke today.  Evangelicals may win the war for the judiciary but they have lost the opportunity to witness the gospel to America for the rest of my lifetime and that of my children.  It's really shocking.  Even with my rainbow flag waiving fervor I still hold a place for the gospel, even when it lacks logic and seems more like a fairy tale and yet now, it's simply not possible.  at least not in that way.  maybe another way but the Evangelical stench is so bad, I'm not even sure if liberal Christians can wash it away. 

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1 hour ago, troph said:

Evangelicals may win the war for the judiciary but they have lost the opportunity to witness the gospel to America for the rest of my lifetime and that of my children. 

I've had a couple conversations over the past several years that were immediately ended with "unless you are preaching to the choir, your words and faith are meaningless now. Your witness is dead" Every time they accept it and drop the subject.

I recently had one of these conversations with an evangelical family member that started to criticize the fact that I had a woman pastor and gays at our church. It didn't take more than a couple of seconds to squash that bug.

 

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I've had a couple conversations over the past several years that were immediately ended with "unless you are preaching to the choir, your words and faith are meaningless now. Your witness is dead" Every time they accept it and drop the subject.

I recently had one of these conversations with an evangelical family member that started to criticize the fact that I had a woman pastor and gays at our church. It didn't take more than a couple of seconds to squash that bug.

 

A few years ago I probably relished watching the carnage but now that I really think it’s over I’m incredibly sad. It’s a terrible place to be as ambassadors for someone you believe saves souls. I’m frankly shocked beyond belief.

 

I enjoy a good progressive church. I do feel genuine care and compassion for humanity at the ones I’ve been too. Its different. It’s nice. It’s also scary because evangelicals used to start the convo the same way. I know it’s different but that’s how much damage they’ve done. the reality is Christianity is permanently damaged by the last 3.5 years and you wouldn’t think the gospel was that subject to human spoliation.

 

Not sure how the good guys win here...

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  • 3 months later...
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Well, similar allegations certainly destroyed Trump's support from veterans and military families.

Did the playbook say to roll with this no matter what?

Edited by slorch
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On 5/31/2020 at 5:31 PM, Nivek said:

So my terminally ill aunt, asked my mom to vote for Trump.  My mom reported back that she basically listens to Rush, Hannity, and Fox all day long.   My dad is still trying to defend Trump and my mom is wondering how my father can still excuse away his stupidity and graft.    She has basically come to the realization he joined a cult.  

It is out in the open they just want to do it at this point.

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Edited by DanTheHorn
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33 minutes ago, Michael Knight said:

 

Sometimes you need a “salty sailor” who shits all over you to get what you want. That’s the compromise the evangelical right have made to get justices on the bench to ban abortion who will ultimately screw them in the end and the evangelical right will never, ever live it down.
 

Well that and the fact that they are white supremacists and trump no doubt speaks to that with his racehorse theories. 

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25 minutes ago, slorch said:

Well, similar allegations certainly destroyed Trump's support from veterans and military families.

Did the playbook say to roll with this no matter what?

Yes because it works. Because it’s true. He’s a huge piece of shit who laughs at them and their service and beliefs. He’s less popular among the troops than ever, same with the evangelicals, at least the one who don’t identify with white supremacy. 

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9 minutes ago, JimmyJames said:

Yes because it works. Because it’s true. He’s a huge piece of shit who laughs at them and their service and beliefs. He’s less popular among the troops than ever, same with the evangelicals, at least the one who don’t identify with white supremacy. 

LOlz.  Those people are racists, gotdammit.

 

Run the play...

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I mean, you just look over there at the Trump Family...and their faith and passion just scares you to death.  Just a scary reminder of how much more fulfilling a Christian life you could be living by walking, as they walk, in the path of Christ.  Scary, yet incredibly inspirational, but also scares you to death.  

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  • 2 months later...

OK, so I came across this today and it was absolute gold.

But then I decided to look into Kenneth Copeland to see how blatant he was about grifting his "flock."  OMG, one of the first videos on his site is about how tithing will lead to prosperity.  It absolutely baffles me beyond comprehension how anyone could buy this BS for one second.  Carnies at least use a little trickier and slight of hand to grift you.  This is staight up- "give to me or God will smite you.  You don't want to be smoten, do ya?"  I knew he was a bad dude and a freak, but this is amazing.  Watch as much as you can stomach.

https://www.kcm.org/watch/tv-broadcast/the-tithers-top-10-0?utm_campaign=coschedule&utm_source=twitter&utm_medium=CopelandNetwork

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