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Vasectomy


Biff Tannen

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Any one mulling it over, just do it.  It's totally worth some slight discomfort to never have to wear a rubber ever again, and wommenz get horny more often when off the pill and enjoy it more (both of which which lead to an increase in getting laid).

Had it done the Friday before conference championship Saturday a few years back.  First one was no big deal.  Second one hurt more; it was as if my other nut said "wtf, you aren't doing that to me." So I went home, iced my nads with a few bags of frozen peas, and enjoyed a full weekend of uninterrupted collegiate and professional football.  Doc prescribed pain meds, which I only needed the first day. There was some slight soreness for a few days (tight briefs helped), but I was back at work Monday.  

Edited by Dutch
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This thread causes me so much confusion.  I cannot understand why guys still subject themselves to all this pain and slow recovery.

To each his own, but I can't comprehend the reason for going through this procedure like it was 1960 with a scalpel, pain meds, and the associated recovery.

There are plenty of docs doing a no-scalpel procedure and it is a piece of cake.

I drove myself 90 min. to the appointment  No meds, quick shot that stung but wasn't bad.  Couple of uncomfortable minutes while it was going on, but I talked fishing with the doc while he was working.

Got up, nurse handed me a cold pack, and I sat on it and drove 90 min back to my office.  Iced some more at the office, that night, and the next morning.

Wore compression shorts under my slacks for a few days and took it easy - no running or lifting but that was it.

I think I worked out on day 5 or 6.

I sure wouldn't want to do it any other way, and having to lay around sore, bruised, and swollen.

I guess if you want to play that sympathy card, schedule it for the Masters or Final Four and lay around...but do that because you want to.  You don't have to actually go through all this trauma described here by some posters. 

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On 7/18/2019 at 9:23 AM, Reagan1k said:

This thread causes me so much confusion.  I cannot understand why guys still subject themselves to all this pain and slow recovery.

To each his own, but I can't comprehend the reason for going through this procedure like it was 1960 with a scalpel, pain meds, and the associated recovery.

There are plenty of docs doing a no-scalpel procedure and it is a piece of cake.

I drove myself 90 min. to the appointment  No meds, quick shot that stung but wasn't bad.  Couple of uncomfortable minutes while it was going on, but I talked fishing with the doc while he was working.

Got up, nurse handed me a cold pack, and I sat on it and drove 90 min back to my office.  Iced some more at the office, that night, and the next morning.

Wore compression shorts under my slacks for a few days and took it easy - no running or lifting but that was it.

I think I worked out on day 5 or 6.

I sure wouldn't want to do it any other way, and having to lay around sore, bruised, and swollen.

I guess if you want to play that sympathy card, schedule it for the Masters or Final Four and lay around...but do that because you want to.  You don't have to actually go through all this trauma described here by some posters. 

I got a shot, which sucked a bit.  I didn't feel the rest.  Got to chill out for a few days, but was up and around with no troubles.  Went jogging and jerked off on day 7.  Not sure what the difference is other than apparently more uncomfortable moments in the doc's office, having to talk to the doc during the procedure, not getting left alone to chill, and getting to work out 2 days earlier.

Maybe it's some sick laser shit, but I'm shooting delicious blanks eight years later.  So there's that.

Edited by dcbc
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Fuck, I walked into the doc's office at 1PM, and by 2:15, I was in the McDonald's drive up getting a burger.   

Slight discomfort for a day or two, never took a pain med, and laying pipe after a week or so.   So fucking easy. I'd do it again tomorrow...it's a no-brainer.  

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On 7/18/2019 at 9:23 AM, Reagan1k said:

This thread causes me so much confusion.  I cannot understand why guys still subject themselves to all this pain and slow recovery.

To each his own, but I can't comprehend the reason for going through this procedure like it was 1960 with a scalpel, pain meds, and the associated recovery.

There are plenty of docs doing a no-scalpel procedure and it is a piece of cake.

I drove myself 90 min. to the appointment  No meds, quick shot that stung but wasn't bad.  Couple of uncomfortable minutes while it was going on, but I talked fishing with the doc while he was working.

Got up, nurse handed me a cold pack, and I sat on it and drove 90 min back to my office.  Iced some more at the office, that night, and the next morning.

Wore compression shorts under my slacks for a few days and took it easy - no running or lifting but that was it.

I think I worked out on day 5 or 6.

I sure wouldn't want to do it any other way, and having to lay around sore, bruised, and swollen.

I guess if you want to play that sympathy card, schedule it for the Masters or Final Four and lay around...but do that because you want to.  You don't have to actually go through all this trauma described here by some posters. 

Yep.  I don't think I even had any major bruising when I got the snip 13 years ago other than around the incision area that last a couple of days at most.  In fact I think I had it done on a Friday and it was a normal weekend as far as running errands and doing stuff around the house for me.   It wasn't like the hernia surgery I had a few years before for sure where I couldn't move for a day or so and I was justified in being a wuss.  

 

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  • 3 months later...

I had this done today.  I wish I had read this thread start to finish so I would have had a different level of expectation.  The surgery itself was fine, I was in and out in an hour and only the shots were painful and honestly, they weren't that bad.  But, the doc made it seem so easy and I believed it.  I wasn't expecting to feel like I had been kicked in the nuts and thought I'd be back at work tomorrow.  I'm not going back to work tomorrow.

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So I’m going to take the plunge. I should be finally divorced before the end of the year (knock on wood). I’m 44, I have two kids whom I love more than anything, and I’m not having anymore kids.

Sorry if already posted over the last several pages, but how long after the procedure can I resume lifting weights?  I need to stay in shape now that I’m diving back into the open market.

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12 hours ago, Laxtonto said:

So baby #2 is due in May. So how soon after should I worry about snip snip? We are pretty sure we want to stop at 2.

I was sure that I would be stopping at 2 so I had mine done before the baby came. Sex starts again after about 6 weeks post birth and it takes around 2 months for us to be 100% sure our procedure worked so I did mine about 3 weeks prior to delivery.  You need to rub one out 40-50 times during this time so might as well use a time you are not getting any.

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13 hours ago, PhillyD said:

I had this done today.  I wish I had read this thread start to finish so I would have had a different level of expectation.  The surgery itself was fine, I was in and out in an hour and only the shots were painful and honestly, they weren't that bad.  But, the doc made it seem so easy and I believed it.  I wasn't expecting to feel like I had been kicked in the nuts and thought I'd be back at work tomorrow.  I'm not going back to work tomorrow.

Did a mechanic do it at a Meineke Lube Shop?

Scalpel or no-stitch method?  

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13 hours ago, Laxtonto said:

So baby #2 is due in May. So how soon after should I worry about snip snip? We are pretty sure we want to stop at 2.

We had number 2 back in June.  Both pregnancies were tough with mandated bed rest due to preeclampsia and after my wife had to go back into the hospital for an overnight a week after the birth I called for the consultation on the way home from the hospital. I wasn't taking a risk on her with a surprise third.  Yeah it hurts, but no worse than watching our defense. 

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On 11/5/2019 at 8:16 AM, ZB'Tejas said:

I was sure that I would be stopping at 2 so I had mine done before the baby came. Sex starts again after about 6 weeks post birth and it takes around 2 months for us to be 100% sure our procedure worked so I did mine about 3 weeks prior to delivery.  You need to rub one out 40-50 times during this time so might as well use a time you are not getting any.

What, no blow jobs for you?

 

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On 11/5/2019 at 6:53 AM, South Austin said:

So I’m going to take the plunge. I should be finally divorced before the end of the year (knock on wood). I’m 44, I have two kids whom I love more than anything, and I’m not having anymore kids.

Sorry if already posted over the last several pages, but how long after the procedure can I resume lifting weights?  I need to stay in shape now that I’m diving back into the open market.

I'd wait a week and then start lifting light and build back up to your norm.   Maybe do more arm exclusive work as well once you start lifting again and less core engaging stuff like squats and dead lifts.   Focus on cardio might be an option too.    Rowing?

Actually taking a week off from the weights might do you some good if you been doing it hardcore lately.   Just don't use it as an excuse to go to a 100% junk food diet.   Keep taking in the proteins and all of that too.  

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1 minute ago, Wiler77 said:

Going to see Trotter this Friday, with surgery temporarily scheduled on Tuesday Dec. 3rd.  What are the odds I'll feel like getting on an airplane for a really long flight to the Middle East?  Well, I mean due to the surgery.

When is the flight? Next day would be uncomfortable. The next two weeks are not painful just more uncomfortable than anything... like the after effects of being kicked in the nuts.

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7 minutes ago, ZB'Tejas said:

When is the flight? Next day would be uncomfortable. The next two weeks are not painful just more uncomfortable than anything... like the after effects of being kicked in the nuts.

This.  The next day wasn't super fun, but I popped a hydrocodone and zonked out.  The next week was uncomfortable, but nothing horrible.  Was back to complete normal after about a week and a half.

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1 minute ago, Biff Tannen said:

This.  The next day wasn't super fun, but I popped a hydrocodone and zonked out.  The next week was uncomfortable, but nothing horrible.  Was back to complete normal after about a week and a half.

sorry, forgot the key point which is hte flight is Saturday.  4 days later

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On 11/5/2019 at 7:53 AM, South Austin said:

So I’m going to take the plunge. I should be finally divorced before the end of the year (knock on wood). I’m 44, I have two kids whom I love more than anything, and I’m not having anymore kids.

Sorry if already posted over the last several pages, but how long after the procedure can I resume lifting weights?  I need to stay in shape now that I’m diving back into the open market.

I lifted today and it's been 5 days since surgery.  This was the first significant' exercise I've done and I only did upper body.  I don't lift weights like I'm 15. trying to get big.  I lift like I'm 48 trying to stay in shape.  No issues lifting.  I'm not comfortable yet doing anything that jostles the sack too much.  Running is still out for me.  

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Seems like it is just a procedure similar to having a boil lanced, but perhaps the docs here could enlighten us.

I’ve had four heart stent implants and regard those as procedures, as no real cutting was involved except to insert a catheter in the artery by my groin. 

Edited by Armybrat
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On 11/5/2019 at 6:53 AM, South Austin said:

how long after the procedure can I resume lifting weights?

You may not feel like doing cardio or legs for a week; at least I didn't.  I was doing free weights (arms and chest) three days after the procedure, though.  Get a few pairs of tighty-whities a size smaller than your normally would wear:  your nads will appreciate the additional support for that first week.  My job involves a lot of walking/on my feet, and they helped the first day or so.  

It really is totally worth it.  Mild discomfort for a few days is a small price to pay for never having to worry about an "oops" or deal with rubbers, and the wife is quite a bit more amorous when off the pill.

Edited by Dutch
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On 11/9/2019 at 7:31 PM, BabaYaga said:

Know what’s worse than everything posted here as a surgery byproduct.  

A screaming baby 

Suck it up boys.  We’ve all been there.  

I remember being there, thinking, man I really love my kids. Am I sure about this?  Would be dangerous for wife to have any more per doc, so I was going through with it either way.  Do the procedure (mine was NOT painless, might have story on scat site, one nut took like 5 shots to  finally “numb”) and head home.  As I walked thru the door, my 1 yo, 2.5 yo, and 5 yo were all screaming, crying, and generally raising hell.  I smiled and walked to the bedroom to lay down, satisfied with my decision.  Took about a week to feel better, probably due to that stubborn one.  Had ghost pains for a bit but never any “complications”.  I jacked it a TON before the first test to make sure I would pass. Like a damn teenager. I’ve got a friend who’s gone thru it twice now, with 2 docs and is still passing (failing?) the test somehow. His wife is 100% against another child so no pussy till it get figured out, ha. 
 

23 hours ago, HOOKEM4 said:

Is a vasectomy really considered surgery?? It is a minor inconvenience for a day or two. It takes what? 5 minutes? Some of you are really building this up more than it is.

*If it goes well.  I had a mild issue during the procedure (see above) Have a friend who’s on round 2 of it, somehow. And neighbor went to bed with normal nuts and woke up with a nut the size of a large orange.   As long as everything goes well, minimal.  But out of the 15 people I’ve discussed it with, a few have had issues.  
 

Good luck to those of you yet to do it. It’s well worth it.  Godspeed. 

Edited by fattyflattie
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  • 5 months later...

So I got snipped this morning. My hair cuts last longer. I was out in no time and slept for about four hours after. Been icing my balls all day and my female companion just brought me some beer and is making a fried chicken run. 

Should’ve done this last year.

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On 11/12/2019 at 9:54 AM, fattyflattie said:

I remember being there, thinking, man I really love my kids. Am I sure about this?  Would be dangerous for wife to have any more per doc, so I was going through with it either way.  Do the procedure (mine was NOT painless, might have story on scat site, one nut took like 5 shots to  finally “numb”) and head home.  As I walked thru the door, my 1 yo, 2.5 yo, and 5 yo were all screaming, crying, and generally raising hell.  I smiled and walked to the bedroom to lay down, satisfied with my decision.  Took about a week to feel better, probably due to that stubborn one.  Had ghost pains for a bit but never any “complications”.  I jacked it a TON before the first test to make sure I would pass. Like a damn teenager. I’ve got a friend who’s gone thru it twice now, with 2 docs and is still passing (failing?) the test somehow. His wife is 100% against another child so no pussy till it get figured out, ha. 
 

*If it goes well.  I had a mild issue during the procedure (see above) Have a friend who’s on round 2 of it, somehow. And neighbor went to bed with normal nuts and woke up with a nut the size of a large orange.   As long as everything goes well, minimal.  But out of the 15 people I’ve discussed it with, a few have had issues.  
 

Good luck to those of you yet to do it. It’s well worth it.  Godspeed. 

I walked out of mine and went to the waiting room to find my wife and she wasn't there.  I find her out in the lobby on the phone with my then first graders teacher.  turns out she asked one of her friends why she "talks to her like she's a fucking idiot."  I was happy with the decision.

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Update for those of you as interested in my balls as your moms are:

Day 3 and I feel 100%.  I spent most of Day 2 off my feet and frequently icing my balls, and was able to crank out some work and take a couple conference calls.  Felt fine enough to move about the house and make my kids dinner.  I haven't felt any significant pain or discomfort, but I'm sticking with the prescription ibuprofen for the anti-inflammatory benefits just to be safe. 

I have the urge to go for a jog around my neighborhood or a light upper body workout.  But my doctor (Trotter, who snipped a few others on this thread -- he was awesome) was adamant about no lifting, running, or sex for one week, and I'm not fucking around with my recovery.  I've read too many stories about guys getting back into their active routines too soon and having setbacks. 

The procedure cost $375, which is far less than cumulative condom purchases or the financial, physical and emotional toll of another kiddo.  As I mentioned before, I should've done this last year and could've avoided slipping the condoms back on in my post-divorce sex life.  So for those sitting on the fence, just do it. 

Oh, and tomorrow night I'm making Shepherd's Pie with all the frozen peas, carrots, and corn. 

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  • 3 weeks later...
Day 1.
Did the no incision, no scalpel, no shot option.
Hardly felt a thing.
Icing balls and lounging. The Valium was nice. Never had that stuff before.

Not sure this qualifies for the vasectomy club. We all paid our dues. Maybe a Jr membership? Men of cut balls and seared veins?
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1 hour ago, midtown said:
3 hours ago, T’Boo Ted Marshall said:
Day 1.
Did the no incision, no scalpel, no shot option.
Hardly felt a thing.
Icing balls and lounging. The Valium was nice. Never had that stuff before.
 

Not sure this qualifies for the vasectomy club. We all paid our dues. Maybe a Jr membership? Men of cut balls and seared veins?

I did this about a year ago and I did get to see the remainder of my internals still clamped in the forceps on the table as I got up to leave the room.  So that was, a bit unnerving. 

But yeah, hydrocodone was fun as hell.

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On 5/6/2020 at 5:53 PM, South Austin said:

So I got snipped this morning. My hair cuts last longer. I was out in no time and slept for about four hours after. Been icing my balls all day and my female companion just brought me some beer and is making a fried chicken run. 

Should’ve done this last year.

My wife at the time watched the procedure -- guess I should have known then she was going to go after my nuts in a divorce 4 years later...

So 3 weeks out and all good??

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8 minutes ago, LTtxfan said:

My wife at the time watched the procedure -- guess I should have known then she was going to go after my nuts in a divorce 4 years later...

So 3 weeks out and all good??

All good.  Resumed my quarantine workouts with dumbbells after one full week off, including some lower body (lunges), and everything has been fine.  Haven't run yet, but will try that on Monday.  Still need to turn in the first sperm test, but I have my lady friend helping with that.   

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10 minutes ago, South Austin said:

All good.  Resumed my quarantine workouts with dumbbells after one full week off, including some lower body (lunges), and everything has been fine.  Haven't run yet, but will try that on Monday.  Still need to turn in the first sperm test, but I have my lady friend helping with that.   

Lucky. My conversation went...

”Into the cup? Ewww that’s too clinical.”

”Fine, I’ll just go beat off.”

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