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Dumbass Shit We See On Facebook


Vic Mackey

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Soooo I got pulled over for SPEEDING ... I already knew why he pulled me over ( I was Speeding🙄) So I decided to test my luck. I got fart spray as a gag gift on xmas and decided to try it out 🤣. The bottle says to squirt about 2 sprays. So as the cop walks toward my car I sprayed about 5 squirts. He gets to my window and asks me to get out. I said I can’t! The officer stopped dead in his tracks and said lawd...what is that smell💩? he said, " I got a situation going on sir!" The look on his face was priceless. I said, Sir my stomach hurts and I’m trying to get home because I.... (he is at my window and he didn't even finish his sentence) He grabs his face, backs up and says... Oh my!! I think you need an ambulance. I said no (trying not to laugh...I looked worried and sick 🤣)
Officer: BE CAREFUL AND TRY NOT TO SPEED BUT I UNDERSTAND ITS AWFUL. HOLD ON.. I’LL ESCORT YOU!
You guys , I did not expect it to go this way but the Officer followed me back to my house , & waited til I got out of the truck (he stayed in his). I had to walk all the way to the door, holding my butt cheeks, and limpin’ like it was hurting! No ticket written!
If you read until the end, share the joke 😂! THIS HAS GOT TO BE THE FUNNIEST SHIT ON THE EARTH.

😂😂😂81765907_162277041670767_118360899439715

 

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4 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

Wʜʏ ᴅᴏᴇsɴ’ᴛ sʜᴇ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ?

Because he has her so brainwashed that it’s all her fault and that she’s no good to anyone and no one will want her or love her and there’s no way she can possibly make it on her own.

Wʜʏ ᴅᴏᴇsɴ’ᴛ sʜᴇ ʟᴇᴀᴠᴇ?

We need your support.
We need your love.
We do not need your judgement. 💜

72140482_10218365992273483_7373057545432

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What kind of protective vests are these and why doesn't the baby have one on also?
They are STYLISH vests, that's what kind.

Love how the product description has to point out that they aren't bulletproof...

"The PU Restricted Icon Vest by LV Premium Outerwear features:

US Sizing

Waist strap velcro closure and shoulder velcro closure

Sleeveless

Back pouch pocket design

Print detail

Velcro panel detail, included removable velcro patches

Imported

THIS IS NOT A BULLET PROOF VEST."
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