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Bachelor/Bachelorette/Paradise Catch-All


C-Man

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9 hours ago, Vito Andolini said:

We’re back, bitches.

Hannah Brown is such a beating.

And some really big titties this season.

My wife was saying the same thing about the boob-o-rama. I like it. I like it a lot. /lloydxmas

Hannah Brown is like a pesky cold that you can't shake. I mean they shoe-horn that annoying bitch into EVERYTHING. I half expect her to show up on ABC World News Tonight at some point.

5 hours ago, henrygandorf said:

well that was a lot. 

Wife and I only made it through the end of the rose ceremony and will knock out the rest tonight.

Hannah Whoever is a smoke show. Thought she might've been over-playing her hand with going back to talk to him multiple times when she'd already cemented it. But it wound up getting her the first impression rose. There is a quite a bit of talent it appears on this season -- and then he keeps the fugly girl that showed up inside a suitcase?!

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yeah, i thought for sure the houston girl who kissed him while he was blindfolded would be the over-aggressive slutty one who made herself the villain.  but then she was mostly absent from the cocktail party.

then hannah ann, who was super hot during her intro and hotter on the show hung out with him, they made out, then she went back and stole him, then she went back and stole him again.  at that point i was like, yeah, new villain, here it comes.  and the wife was all, "you know, i liked her, but now she seems crazy."

confused emma stone GIF by SAG Awards

 

she reminds me (not in looks, but in action) of the chick about 3 seasons ago, i think she was from austin, who got the first impression rose, thought and acted like she was the front runner, then flamed out a few weeks later.  she did this thing where she opened her mouth super wide and looked really scary.

sidenote, i love the girls who get out to a big lead early (or think they do).  their attitude shifts from "he's really cute and i think we made a good connection" to "i honestly don't understand why they're not cancelling the show and sending everyone else home, i mean, this is obviously over."

and because c-man may not be caught up...

predictions on what they're gonna do about hannah b?  considering she likely views herself no longer as a "bachelor" star, but as an actual celebrity (eye-roll), my gut says no way she lowers herself to just being a contestant again.  and if she did, there's no way the show would allow her to win, so she would know it was an unhappy ending regardless. 

she's a beating though, and they need to clean it up and end her time during the beginning of the next episode.  they acted like having her show up and slowly and painfully describe her sexual encounter with the dude they're all chasing would be somewhat awkward but still fun and funny, and it wasn't at all.  also the sex was from like 6 months ago.  the girls seemed pissed.  she's not some role model or bachelor universe celebrity icon to these chicks, they want to knife her.

including ^^^ there was definitely more crying than i've ever seen on a season premiere.  if you were playing a drinking game, i hope you woke up in a jewish hospital.

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49 minutes ago, henrygandorf said:

sidenote, i love the girls who get out to a big lead early (or think they do).  their attitude shifts from "he's really cute and i think we made a good connection" to "i honestly don't understand why they're not cancelling the show and sending everyone else home, i mean, this is obviously over."

To be fair, that's what this episode seemed like.

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15 minutes ago, Beau Vine said:

To be fair, that's what this episode seemed like.

right, except there were 3 different girls who probably felt this way.

who in the fuck invites a reality show first date to their parents' vowel renewal?  did you see her at the impromptu country music concert?  she already has inside jokes with nana.

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There was some blonde last night that just lost her shit when she didn't get the first impression rose.  He was acting like she wanted to quit because she didn't get the first rose handed out.  Bitch, he's giving out about 20 more roses.  Cool your shit.  

This batch of girls seem quite a bit hotter than the last season.  I'm hoping a lot crazier and freakier as well.  And no more Hannah.  Ugh.   Unattractive and can't string more than 7 words together without sounding brain damaged?  Sign me up!  Enough already.  

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1 hour ago, henrygandorf said:

who in the fuck invites a reality show first date to their parents' vowel renewal?

uphauling.

There is no way Hannah should join the show.  If either Peter or her had any brains, they'd agree that he continue the show and if he found someone he wanted to be with more than Hannah, so be it.  Otherwise, he chooses to go to Hannah.  There is literally zero to gain by having her join the house OTHER THAN MILLIONS OF SWEET EYEBALLS WATCHING THE TRAINWRECK EACH WEEK THAT WILL BOOST RATINGS.  

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1 hour ago, RockyMountainHighHorn said:

Never really watched this show but you guys have been talking it up this year so Might have to dive in. Going solely off of cast pictures I’m favoring Courtney, but could be far off without seeing it live. Anyone with an ass or just all tatas?

there’s really something for everyone. 

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Wife and I finally powered through last night and, yes, a lot of first episode crying. Jesus. And Hannah B joining the show? Please God no. Awful.

Team Hannah Ann. And the little spinner basketball player he took to his parents renewing their vows for their 31st anniversary is nice too even though she didn't get the memo about  needing tits to come on this show.

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1 hour ago, ajax said:

Hannah Ann is a true hottie but is that supposed to be a good boob job? I know nothing about fake boobs but it looks like someone cut a volleyball in half and glued them 6 inches apart on her chest.

yeah, in the old days it seemed to be the objective was "we're gonna make it hard to tell if they're fake".  now, it's almost like they want people to know they're fake, and it's especially obvious on a skinny chick with a small frame.

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I just got done watching the first episode and I'm cringing so hard at some of the corny shit these women come up with.

"Hi Peter. People say my dinner rolls are yeasty, but that's the only thing that's yeast infected."

And Hannah B is going to continue to be famous primarily for getting fucked in a windmill. 

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9 hours ago, C-Man said:

 


So did I. Not sure I see how exactly DK can refuse to pay them. They each submitted 150 lineups. They paid $25 for each entry and won $1M.

would dk pay them back if she didnt win the milly? i think not.

also, jasmine is a co-worker of mine.

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That was one of the worst tv shows I’ve ever seen.

 

To bring a girl on to talk about a tryst in front of other girls? Horribad writing. She should be embarrassed that she’s having feelings for the this one in line after the first two basically rejected her.

 

I do like some of the talent though. Seems better than past seasons.

 

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11 hours ago, C-Man said:

 


So did I. Not sure I see how exactly DK can refuse to pay them. They each submitted 150 lineups. They paid $25 for each entry and won $1M.

 

I think the argument would be that they obviously colluded together in setting their line ups.  Each of them turned in 150 unique line ups, which is within the rules.  The problem is, each of their 150 unique line ups were also different than each other's line ups.  So basically, Tyler used his wife's name to enable him to enter the contest twice and was able to submit 300 unique line ups where everybody else was only able to turn in 150.  That's where they broke the rules.  Of course, I'm sure a bunch of other people did the same thing.  Just don't make your partner in crime your wife.  

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1.  The champagne mixup was awesome.  

2. MyKenna is fucking annoying.

3.  Hello, Sarah, how did I not notice you week 1?

4,  Victoria is a crackhead.  If you haven't seen the spoilers, multiple women from her hometown contacted Reality Steve to tell them that she had slept with their husbands.  

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Edited by Beau Vine
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13 hours ago, Vito Andolini said:

Catching up a bit. When did Janice Dickinson turn into Caitlin Jenner?

Years ago.  I don't ever remember her hot and I'm pretty old.  The first time I saw her was on some awful reality show (The Surreal Life maybe?) and she looked like a facelift nightmare 10+ years ago.   Honestly, I can't say she looks any worse now.  Once you reach that level of fucking horror, it's splitting hairs.  

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4 minutes ago, Go Pokes said:

Years ago.  I don't ever remember her hot and I'm pretty old.  The first time I saw her was on some awful reality show (The Surreal Life maybe?) and she looked like a facelift nightmare 10+ years ago.   Honestly, I can't say she looks any worse now.  Once you reach that level of fucking horror, it's splitting hairs.  

Yep, it was The Surreal Life. About 15 years ago, she was the designated train wreck on every trash reality show there was, and yes, already a victim of too much plastic surgery. But now, yeesh, I think the fillers in her cheeks have pushed thru the skin. 

And I don’t remember her as a working model, even though I’m older than a lot of you. I think they pumped up her credentials as a “supermodel” back in the day to validate why she was cast as a “celebrity.”  Models from that era... Twiggy, Hemingway, Hutton, Brinkley, Tiegs... supermodels, but not her. She just claimed the title.

But she is one of the first Bill Cosby accusers, years before Hannibal Burress started talking shit. But no one seemed to take significant notice. 

Ironic how she was criticizing the girls for not acting professionally on the runway. Being a walking/shrieking mess is what gave her a career the last two decades.
 

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2 hours ago, youdunnf'dup said:

Lol how the fuck do you keep Kelsey after all that. Even if one of the girls popped her champagne and winked at her afterwards, you can’t just keep her after she reacts like that. Not with some of the hot ass girls he sent home.

the producers have a hand in who gets picked last. 

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Lol how the fuck do you keep Kelsey after all that. Even if one of the girls popped her champagne and winked at her afterwards, you can’t just keep her after she reacts like that. Not with some of the hot ass girls he sent home.


Plus they gotta keep the required amount of other ethnicities around until later in the season rose ceremonies.


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