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Words & Phrases that make you chuckle every time


ernest_t_bass

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On 6/8/2018 at 2:19 PM, Buck Strickland said:

They are fucked up like a soup sandwich.

 

We had a drunken Sunday afternoon one day and came up with some similar ones to the ol’ soup sandwich and football bat:

fucked up like a surf sword, like chips & chocolate, like orange juice and cookies, and on and on.  Can’t remember some of them for obvious reasons. 

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On 6/8/2018 at 9:57 PM, ernest_t_bass said:

Not sure if he's still here, but on shaggy bevo/texas, the poster referred to as "Numbers" who had some random numbers as his user name.  Every time he was called "numbers" I laughed my ass off.

The numbers weren't random.  They were the telephone dial equivalent of his previous username.  But, yeah, it was funny when folks referred to him as numbers - like some old Dick Tracy villain.

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"Butt Doctor"

My wife and I were talking about the father of one of our daughter's classmates. Dude's an oddball. I asked if he was a doctor and she said, "Yeah, he's either a foot doctor or a butt doctor - I'm not sure which."

 

 

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It will depend on the context. Sheeple isn’t really funny most places. Particularly when you are talking about people being like a herd of sheep in their thinking. However, at work, sheeple is pretty damn funny. An ex coworker swore up and down you could get sheep knocked up and make them.

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Wilder than a two peckered billy goat

colder than a witches tit in  brass bra

like two rats screwin' in wool sock

tryin' to squeeze 10 pounds of shit in a 5 pound sack

like a cow pissin' on  a flat rock

you could screw up a one man rock fight

you could screw up a wetdream

busier than a 1-legged man in a buttkickin' contest

lookin' like they farted in church

76-37-5

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We were driving from Waynesville, MO toward St Louis a few weeks ago and decided to stop at the Uranus Fudge Factory.  We've seen the signs hundreds of times but never stopped.  When you first walk in all of the employees yell "Welcome to Uranus!".

When we checked out, the cashier yells out "Thank you for picking Uranus!".  I giggled.

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Closing in on three pages and no one has offered up...

Poontang?

If I'm I'm gonna get my balls blown off half way around the world for a word, my word is Poontang.

 

I use poontang the following way:

 

I will ask someone if poontang is one word or two, I tell them I’m asking because trying I’m trying to finish my ChristianMingle dating profile...

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