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How do I get rid of my neighbor?


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Guy buys house a block away from us in south Austin. Everything seems normal at first. Then some weird shit starts happening. Here's how things went down:

  • He's got a bunch of flat decorative xeriscaping stones in his front yard that he keeps reorganizing in the middle of the night.
  • Then he starts stacking them up in large piles in his front yard like the dude in Close Encounters does with his mashed potatoes
  • We notice that a bunch of garbage is piling up behind the chain link fence on the side of his house.
  • Then he starts spray painting the inside of his windows with random purple lines.
  • Then he starts spray painting the trees with single purple lines. (All of this is happening around 3am while people are sleeping).
  • Then he starts tagging the curbs and the fire hydrant on his curb (he's in a corner house)
  • Then he starts leaving plastic easter eggs full of trash in his neighbors' mailboxes
  • His car gets repossessed
  • He starts riding his bike around the neighborhood offering kids playing outside easter eggs filled with ripped up dollar bills and other trash
  • He starts putting upside down crosses in his front yard made out of sticks, Jason hockey masks on his door knob, and fake molotov cocktails on his driveway.
  • Then the shit hits the fan - He COVERS the front of his house in insane alt-right bullshit - KEK = GOD (The O was an Anarchy sign); "No Welfare Checks - Pay Me Cash" along with a bunch of bullshit satanic/pagan garbage.
  • He starts knocking on neighbors doors at 10pm. They don't answer. He leaves a trail of full beers from their porch to his.
  • He starts screaming at people when they're walking down the street and threatening them
  • He lays down in the middle of the street screaming at the top of his lungs at midnight (neighbors keep helping him up and getting him to go back to his yard. I suggest they let him get runover)
  • One neighbor says he spit on her. 

The neighborhood, as you can imagine, is fed up. The cops say there's not much they can do to evict him because he owns the house.  They do keep coming out to arrest him for drunk and disorderly conduct. Mental health services have come by a few times, and I think they took him in once, as he was gone for about a week. But he keeps getting out, keeps coming back, and keeps acting like a deranged lunatic. According to his immediate neighbors, some of his friends have come by to check on him but he won't see them. They said he's been doing meth. There are three immediate neighbors that are trying to sell their house and it's never gonna happen with him there. They're essentially being held hostage to this motherfucker. I feel terrible for them.

So the question is, what can we do to get him the fuck out of the neighborhood? Do you have any experience with anything similar? How did you rid your neighborhood of an insane neighbor? Someone on nextdoor mentioned that house sales are public record, and they found out that his mortgage is through Wells Fargo. The best we can figure is that the dude inherited a lot of money and can just keep making his mortgage payment. But if the bank knows that he's destroying the house that they own, they might intervene? Can we contact the bank? 

 

 

 

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Immediate neighbors have said family, maybe a brother, have come out to try to talk to him, but he won't open the door. He sits on his porch screaming at people all day. People came to look at the house next door and he's screaming "you can't buy that house motherfucker! get the fuck out of here!" They leave and then he screams for anyone that sees/can hear "can't tell me what to do on my property" and makes the "washing of his hands" gesture. 

Cops get called and he just goes inside and there's nothing they can do. When they leave he goes back on the porch and starts his insane ramblings again. This goes on pretty much all day. It's absurd.

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I don't want to kill the guy. I just want him gone. Or dead. I just don't want to be the one to have to do it or commission it. Although, if I were his immediate neighbor and trying to sell my house, I might consider hiring a house painter, literally, and figuratively. 

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Holy shit, came in here for the lulz expecting... guy is a douche and either doesn't mow his grass or complains about the length of yours.  This is not that.  Seems like the thing where he's harassing children might be a promising trail to go down.

 

This definitely seems like meth though.

Edited by Celery Man
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Dude is obviously legit crazy, drugs or not.  Does he own the house outright?  Is there a way to contact lien holder if not?  If the cops were called for a welfare check does that give them probable cause to go in seeing the house vandalized like that?  One of rare times I am glad to be under an HOA.

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Dude is obviously legit crazy, drugs or not.  Does he own the house outright?  Is there a way to contact lien holder if not?  If the cops were called for a welfare check does that give them probable cause to go in seeing the house vandalized like that?  One of rare times I am glad to be under an HOA.

Don’t think he owns outright. Says Lein is held by Wells Fargo. Who do you call in this situation? Customer service?
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Was expecting 'guy keeps parking in front of my house'....but holy shit, I can't say I've seen anything quite like that. 

There was a guy who lived out in the country near here that used to put up a bunch of anti-government/apocalypse  signs on his land that everyone could see from the road.  But he had acres and acres of land so the neighbors were miles away.    

 

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This feels like a situation that's going to resolve itself sooner than later.   He's going to do something illegal or OD at some point.  But yeah, if you're trying to sell your house, or if you have kids that walk by that house, or if you live in earshot, that's an extremely uncomfortable wait.

Edited by Monster
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21 minutes ago, irishtexan said:


Don’t think he owns outright. Says Lein is held by Wells Fargo. Who do you call in this situation? Customer service?

I suppose that's worth a shot.  Get someone in the mortgage department or foreclosures.  Probably a pretty rare problem so they might not really know what to do either, especially if he's making payments, but I can't imagine they like seeing a house they own painted up like that.

Edited by Gene Parmesan
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I went through this with a neighbor, very similar. had floodlights aimed directly at my kids rooms. Threatened our animals. Used to sit out inside his fence watching our house all night and I could hear him talking to himself. Combo of Meth and the crazies. Cops came many times, usually he called them with some BS rationale. Finally arrested his ass and held for 72 hours. There is just not much you can do. Sorry man, but going via the bank sounds the like the best bet. Or write a novel about it. 

 

 

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I'd call the news channels and hope they get a slow news day, although even they would probably be worried about making fun of the mentally ill.

Probably ought to focus on the Molotov ieds/meth/hazardous material eggs/threats to neighbors/homeland security/austin bomber/see something/say something angle. Esp.after the Austin bomber.

P.S. - if OP gets this guy to move, he has got to go somewhere. Just say'n...

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An alternative is to try to get him to stay. OP grabs all the cash he can and buys up houses from neighbors who want to move away. When OP has all the extra houses he can handle, then get the Aggy neighbor to confront the crazy guy. Once crazy guy is off to prison, then OP buys crazy guy's house and maybe Aggy's too.

One layer of fresh paint, then sell the lot to California tech weenies. Name one of your kids after me and retire on the profits.

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Park an older registered car directly in front of his house.  Then a second.  It won't be long until he snaps and does something stupid and illegal.  Out here we call it "poking the bear". The longer this goes on, the greater chance a kid or innocent person gets hurt.

 

PS:  It would be interesting if the neighbor trying to sell who had buyers run off has some sort of cause for redress. 

 

 

 

Edited by Whitman
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Whatever happened to the good ol' anonymous tip to the popo that a guy was dealing drugs out of his house? Or that he had dead bodies stashed in a crawlspace? And if he actually IS on meth then there's a dealer somewhere. Take up a collection among the neighbors to hire a private detective, get the goods on this nutcase, pay the dealer to set him up.

Or just do as Whitman suggested and let nature take its course with some assistance.

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28 minutes ago, Whitman said:

Park an older registered car directly in front of his house.  Then a second.  It won't be long until he snaps and does something stupid and illegal.  Out here we call it "poking the bear". The longer this goes on, the greater chance a kid or innocent person gets hurt.

 

PS:  It would be interesting if the neighbor trying to sell who had buyers run off has some sort of cause for redress. 

 

 

 

I love that you've dealt with this enough that it has a term. Not a bad idea, it'd probably piss him off I bet.

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1 hour ago, RDCanecutter said:

An alternative is to try to get him to stay. OP grabs all the cash he can and buys up houses from neighbors who want to move away. When OP has all the extra houses he can handle, then get the Aggy neighbor to confront the crazy guy. Once crazy guy is off to prison, then OP buys crazy guy's house and maybe Aggy's too.

One layer of fresh paint, then sell the lot to California tech weenies. Name one of your kids after me and retire on the profits.

I like this idea

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13 minutes ago, El Diablo said:

Whatever happened to the good ol' anonymous tip to the popo that a guy was dealing drugs out of his house? Or that he had dead bodies stashed in a crawlspace? And if he actually IS on meth then there's a dealer somewhere. Take up a collection among the neighbors to hire a private detective, get the goods on this nutcase, pay the dealer to set him up.

Or just do as Whitman suggested and let nature take its course with some assistance.

Dude has already been arrested about a dozen times since he moved in a few months ago. I don't think simple possession charges are going to do the trick, as he seemingly has a ton of cash to keep paying his mortgage and bailing himself out of jail while not working.

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