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Official "Fuck this stupid ass-commercial" thread


Prepuce of Doom

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On 12/5/2020 at 1:09 PM, Underdog said:

Fucking Uber Eats had a good thing going with Hamill/Stewart, now they're cramming Simone and Whateverthefuckthatis down our throats. 

Looks like they bailed from that and went back to Hamill/Stewart. Good call.

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1 hour ago, shadow_operative said:

seriously? y'all are all teary eyed over that crap? that ad was hokey, and terrible, and everything that sucks about holiday commercials. 

Well, for me I have a 17 month old granddaughter, daughter and SIL who I will not get to see this Christmas because of concerns about of Covid. The granddaughter, my first grandchild, is getting to the age of recognizing things and enjoying things. I was really looking forward to her seeing the tree and house all decorated.

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1 hour ago, shadow_operative said:

seriously? y'all are all teary eyed over that crap? that ad was hokey, and terrible, and everything that sucks about holiday commercials. 

That def didn’t do it for me. There was one last year that had me crying like a little bitch though, just lost my last grandparent though so it hit hard. 
 

 

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10 hours ago, Snacks said:

So....apparently, Disney is trying to be diverse, and they've come up with this movie called "Soul."

As only Disney would do with their first "black" movie, it seems two of the primary characters are ghosts.

I'll let you connect the dots.

 

9 hours ago, Brisketexan said:


Walt Disney sees dead black people?

 

9 hours ago, After irth said:

So...spooks?

 

Im gonna go with the only 2 white voices are the ghosts?

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When I was a kid there was a show called "wildest police chases". Hosted by some retired sheriff, who was no doubt an asshole. I even remember his voice just sounded like an asshole, but I digress.

Occasionally they would show a guy on a motorcycle making a run for it. As I recall, it never ended well for the guy on the motorcycle.

In my fantasy, it's one of those stupid motaurs. It flies by doing about 130 mph erratically as shit, crashes into a semi hauling gasoline, and bursts into flames. This isn't gonna end well for the motaur.

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On 12/15/2020 at 10:44 AM, Deamerxt said:

When I was a kid there was a show called "wildest police chases". Hosted by some retired sheriff, who was no doubt an asshole. I even remember his voice just sounded like an asshole, but I digress.

Occasionally they would show a guy on a motorcycle making a run for it. As I recall, it never ended well for the guy on the motorcycle.

In my fantasy, it's one of those stupid motaurs. It flies by doing about 130 mph erratically as shit, crashes into a semi hauling gasoline, and bursts into flames. This isn't gonna end well for the motaur.

Sheriff John Bunnell - face like an asshole, too. 

Flo & co. from Progressive should be stir fried and then dumped into the ocean, but their more recent "becoming your parents" series cracks me up. 

 

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fair enough. i suppose if the commercial actually does hit home for you then i can see why you'd like it. but as a general rule i really can't stand 9/10 commercials where the only goal is to tug at your heart strings. 

My thought exactly. Some dip shit advertiser thinks they are going to manipulate my emotions with some melodramatic 30 second horse shit commercial to sell phone service or cola? GTFO. If someone buys that hamfisted crap then they are a simpleton. Present company excluded naturally.
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9 hours ago, Lhorn said:


My thought exactly. Some dip shit advertiser thinks they are going to manipulate my emotions with some melodramatic 30 second horse shit commercial to sell phone service or cola? GTFO. If someone buys that hamfisted crap then they are a simpleton. Present company excluded naturally.

 

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9 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

but their more recent "becoming your parents" series cracks me up. 

 

Maybe it's because I'm in my late 30's and right in the sweet spot age for those, but fuck I laugh every. single. time. Those commercials hit hard. Really hard. 

 

"Who else reads books about submarines?" .... "my dad" 

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33 minutes ago, PittsburghTiger said:

The Macy’s fragrance commercials with Johnny Depp and the other one with Lenny Kravitz are fucking awful.  Is Depp digging a grave in the desert to bury some chick who pissed him off?

All perfume commercials have been absolutely weird and total shit for upwards of 50 years.

lest ye forget:

 

from 1992:

 

Eddie Murphy made hella fun of those perfume commercials it in Boomerang (also 1992)...

 

and finally the only perfume commercial worth a damn was done this year by Andrew Cotter.... you must have the sound on for it to make any sense at all

 

 

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also rising real high on the list... the new hyper-woke Best Buy annimated commercials. 

 

I dont give a shit about the views presented, but its total bullshit wokeness to act like they give a shit and are hip to the world now.... which is hilarous because their entire store philosophy for 25 years is to fuck the consumer for max cash. 

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also rising real high on the list... the new hyper-woke Best Buy annimated commercials. 
 
I dont give a shit about the views presented, but its total bullshit wokeness to act like they give a shit and are hip to the world now.... which is hilarous because their entire store philosophy for 25 years is to fuck the consumer for max cash. 

We could have a great discussion on the duality of corporate philanthropy efforts in the Cloak Room.
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google can go fuck itself for its latest completely asinine ad. it's basically a reminder of how shitty 2020 has been mixed with some phony message about all of us uniting as one. what that happened to do with google, i have no fucking idea. and why google needs to advertise in the first place, again, i have no idea.

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5 hours ago, shadow_operative said:

google can go fuck itself for its latest completely asinine ad. it's basically a reminder of how shitty 2020 has been mixed with some phony message about all of us uniting as one. what that happened to do with google, i have no fucking idea. and why google needs to advertise in the first place, again, i have no idea.

Completely agree.  I actually said, "Fuck off Google" out loud, then had to explain myself to my wife, who was in the other room.

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