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Going on my first cruise


Mo Horn

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2 hours ago, Jimbaround said:

Did this around Italy, and also did a Silversea in the Baltic.  These are nothing like the Carnival Wal-Mart ships.  They are much more expensive though unless you can find a special (and are then only about 3x a Carnival cruise).

I recall when checking in for our Baltic trip the dude next to me (later found out he and his family were taking a year off to travel around the world) was sporting a nice Lange Tourbillon; not your typical cruising crowd.

We have done 2.  We took our kids on the Encore on a 10 day from Rome to Barcelona.  Our favorite port was Valletta.   Last summer we went from Athens to Venice with stops on Croatia on the Odyssey.   Unless you are on Ponant, you can’t beat the Seabourn.   

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Skimmed through the thread, lot of good advice.  I've only been on 2 but we just bought empty shampoo bottles and filled them with booze along with whatever you're allowed to bring with you.  It'll be fun at first but you'll quickly realize that it gets old being stuck on the boat and then being bombarded with people trying to sell you shit, or more likely sending their kids to try and sell you shit, when you debark the ship.  Glad I did a few but I'd much rather just book an all inclusive trip somewhere.

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Girlfriend and I are doing Athens and Greek islands on an all gay tall ship cruise. Pretty stoked about it.

 

https://sourceevents.com/all-gay-greek-islands-odyssey-cruise/

 

And we and some friends - the couple that introduced us to the Greek cruise - want to get a group to do this one in Japan.

 

https://us.ponant.com/cruises/asia-an-immersion-in-japanese-culture-s300520-om2045-4

 

And that virgin voyage to Havana from Miami looks super dope.

 

 

I can’t imagine sardine packed deal like carnival though. Not even sure I’d take one with my kids.

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1 minute ago, troph said:

Girlfriend and I are doing Athens and Greek islands on an all gay tall ship cruise. Pretty stoked about it.

https://sourceevents.com/all-gay-greek-islands-odyssey-cruise/

And we and some friends - the couple that introduced us to the Greek cruise - want to get a group to do this one in Japan.

https://us.ponant.com/cruises/asia-an-immersion-in-japanese-culture-s300520-om2045-4

And that virgin voyage to Havana from Miami looks super dope.

Is it the dress like a virgin cruise ?

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 6/2/2019 at 2:22 PM, 4th&Five said:

A cruise isn’t my preferred vacation but if you’re miserable on one then you’re probably miserable most places. 

I agree with this.  I am not a cruise person, but ended up on a 3 day company sponsored cruise. It was worst case scenario:  Carnival, Ensanada cruise, over St. Patrick's Day and Spring Break, with co-workers.  Crowd was a total circus and it was not one of the nice ships out there.  But, surprisingly, I had a good time.  We had the drink passes, so that helped, but there was plenty of relaxing time, plus party time, plus goofy shows, plus massages at the spa.  Can't complain.

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I'm not miserable but this boat (The Dream) is kind of emblematic of what the Average American thinks is good food. The dinners have been unremarkable at best and below average for the most part.  Breakfast is just OK with the requisite crowds that happen when there are 5,000 people in one place.  Watching Dorothy from Midland lose her mind over the all you can shovel in your pie hole buffet was funny the first day but its day 4 and the luster is lost.   It was also funny when friends of ours were raving about the food but I'm the guy in the group who pays attention to the "New Houston Restaurants " thread, takes notes and tries new places.  My friends are the kind who wonder if there was a Chilis in Cozumel. 

The bars, especially the ones by the pools, are crowded as fuck with watered down drinks for the most part.  We did find one where the bartenders know how to make real cocktails and not the frozen Daiqicoladarita special of the day.

We took an excursion over to Playa Del Carmen and swam in some cenotes.  The water was refreshingly  cold and the excursion group we were with was great.   One of them had some very good stalactites and stalagmites.   The "authentic" Mayan meal at the end was actually pretty good and went will with a cold beer.  Our guide was super knowledgeable about the area, topography, etc and was very friendly.   I got the feeling he wasn't just nice because we pay.

There are 5 couples in our group and 3 of them are the "sit by the pool/at the beach and get slobber knocking drunk" crowd.  Yesterday they staggered back on the boat at 5:00 pm and never left their rooms the rest of they day.  This morning at breakfast there were more of them with hangovers than without.   But they're going back to another beach today for round 2.  I'm going to some ruins and hopefully to find something good to eat in town.

 

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On 6/2/2019 at 5:16 PM, NateHitch said:

Skimmed through the thread, lot of good advice.  I've only been on 2 but we just bought empty shampoo bottles and filled them with booze along with whatever you're allowed to bring with you.  It'll be fun at first but you'll quickly realize that it gets old being stuck on the boat and then being bombarded with people trying to sell you shit, or more likely sending their kids to try and sell you shit, when you debark the ship.  Glad I did a few but I'd much rather just book an all inclusive trip somewhere.

Rum runners work better.  At least on the one cruise I used them per a recommendation from a friend.  Take a 12 pack of soda, pour our half, pour in booze.  Profit.  Agree on the all inclusive.  But when younger, the kids liked to cruise with a few other families and friends.  Just to relax and take group excursions.  Not the worst thing to do.  

Rum Runners

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12 minutes ago, Macanudo said:

I'm not miserable but this boat (The Dream) is kind of emblematic of what the Average American thinks is good food. The dinners have been unremarkable at best and below average for the most part.  Breakfast is just OK with the requisite crowds that happen when there are 5,000 people in one place.  Watching Dorothy from Midland lose her mind over the all you can shovel in your pie hole buffet was funny the first day but its day 4 and the luster is lost.   It was also funny when friends of ours were raving about the food but I'm the guy in the group who pays attention to the "New Houston Restaurants " thread, takes notes and tries new places.  My friends are the kind who wonder if there was a Chilis in Cozumel. 

The bars, especially the ones by the pools, are crowded as fuck with watered down drinks for the most part.  We did find one where the bartenders know how to make real cocktails and not the frozen Daiqicoladarita special of the day.

We took an excursion over to Playa Del Carmen and swam in some cenotes.  The water was refreshingly  cold and the excursion group we were with was great.   One of them had some very good stalactites and stalagmites.   The "authentic" Mayan meal at the end was actually pretty good and went will with a cold beer.  Our guide was super knowledgeable about the area, topography, etc and was very friendly.   I got the feeling he wasn't just nice because we pay.

There are 5 couples in our group and 3 of them are the "sit by the pool/at the beach and get slobber knocking drunk" crowd.  Yesterday they staggered back on the boat at 5:00 pm and never left their rooms the rest of they day.  This morning at breakfast there were more of them with hangovers than without.   But they're going back to another beach today for round 2.  I'm going to some ruins and hopefully to find something good to eat in town.

 

If you have body image issues AT ALL.....a cruise just might be the thing for you!

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2 hours ago, Macanudo said:

There are 5 couples in our group and 3 of them are the "sit by the pool/at the beach and get slobber knocking drunk" crowd.  Yesterday they staggered back on the boat at 5:00 pm and never left their rooms the rest of they day.  This morning at breakfast there were more of them with hangovers than without.   But they're going back to another beach today for round 2.  I'm going to some ruins and hopefully to find something good to eat in town.

 

If you're in Cozumel, go to Los Otates. Do not go to the "ruins" at San Gervasio unless you just like being hot and watching iguanas.

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4 hours ago, Macanudo said:

I'm on a fucking Carnival boat right now and it's the equivalent of a Wal-Mart in a shitty part of town.  The people watching is fantastic but the dates 80s looking interior is just sad and the serve low grade dog food.  

MellowChillyGelada-max-1mb.gif

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On 6/18/2019 at 8:46 AM, Macanudo said:

I'm on a fucking Carnival boat right now and it's the equivalent of a Wal-Mart in a shitty part of town.  The people watching is fantastic but the dates 80s looking interior is just sad and the serve low grade dog food.  

I probably saw your boat Monday. I just got back from my first cruise on Royal Caribbean to Costa Maya and Cozumel. Saw two carnival boats in Cozumel. Our food, at least in the main dining room, was very good. I had steak 3 nights and it was always really good. The buffet for breakfast and lunch was typical buffet.

I had a good time, but won't be doing another cruise for the foreseeable future. I like exploring places for a few days. We did take a cab to downtown in Cozumel and walked to a mercado in the hood for some real food. Funny seeing all these scooters with locals on them carrying their extremely young children like it was nothing. But then we went to one of those beaches where you pay for beach access and eat and drink and is full of people off the cruises. That kind of sucked. It was just an extension of your cruise offshore. Next time I go to Mexico I will be flying. The days on the boat are just like you are in an Imperial Palace type casino in Vegas. Not really how I want to spend a vacation. I would rather have some local culture.

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I just got back from my first Alaska cruise about 10 days ago. The ship was nice, the food was average and people were the worst. But I had fun and being able to see the glaciers from the boat was pretty awesome. Overall glad we did it. 

I doubt I would do another North American cruise but I could see doing one on a smaller (the one we were on was about 2700 people with crew) boat in Europe or Asia. 

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19 hours ago, po elvis said:

I probably saw your boat Monday. I just got back from my first cruise on Royal Caribbean to Costa Maya and Cozumel. Saw two carnival boats in Cozumel. Our food, at least in the main dining room, was very good. I had steak 3 nights and it was always really good. The buffet for breakfast and lunch was typical buffet.

I had a good time, but won't be doing another cruise for the foreseeable future. I like exploring places for a few days. We did take a cab to downtown in Cozumel and walked to a mercado in the hood for some real food. Funny seeing all these scooters with locals on them carrying their extremely young children like it was nothing. But then we went to one of those beaches where you pay for beach access and eat and drink and is full of people off the cruises. That kind of sucked. It was just an extension of your cruise offshore. Next time I go to Mexico I will be flying. The days on the boat are just like you are in an Imperial Palace type casino in Vegas. Not really how I want to spend a vacation. I would rather have some local culture.

Yep... We were coming back on the ferry from Playa as your boat was going out to sea.   Pretty much exactly how I feel now that I'm home about the trip overall.   The Cozumel stop excursion was the highlight of trip.   I finally said fuck it last yesterday and drank my 15 drinks.   Spread it out from noon to midnight and found a bartender who would make real drinks.  I wasn't hungover this morning but I do regret that. 

One of the things Carnival does a bad job of is using the ship's spaces adequately.   In the main theater, they filled it up during the day with Bingo and cheesy Dating Game things.   Why not show a movie during the day for those that don't want to sit on deck when they do the night time ones?   The comedians only did night time shows.  There were two on board who each did 2/4 nights and two shows a night.   The room they worked in was closed until the evening.   Besides the comedy, they did karaoke in there a few times.  There's a piano bar that is only open 3/4 nights and then only from about 8:00-midnight.   Only one piano player so I can see why that happens but why not bring on another.  

I know, I know. They do studies and have figured out what works best at what time but for those who don't want to sit outside by a shitty pool filled with entirely too many people, cruising is not the thing to do.   It did not help that temperatures were in the mid to upper 90s  and humid as hell for the whole trip.  I can sit at home in my backyard and do that for free with much cheaper drinks and better food.  

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On 6/19/2019 at 10:03 PM, hornbri said:

I just got back from my first Alaska cruise about 10 days ago. The ship was nice, the food was average and people were the worst. But I had fun and being able to see the glaciers from the boat was pretty awesome. Overall glad we did it. 

I doubt I would do another North American cruise but I could see doing one on a smaller (the one we were on was about 2700 people with crew) boat in Europe or Asia. 

We're going on an Alaska cruise next month with my wife's mother and sister (plus her kids and boyfriend). My wife will get quality time with her mom and sister, our kids will have a blast with their cousins, and I'll be stuck with the Trump-supporting, QAnon conspiracy theorist boyfriend. 

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1 hour ago, HornPhD said:

We're going on an Alaska cruise next month with my wife's mother and sister (plus her kids and boyfriend). My wife will get quality time with her mom and sister, our kids will have a blast with their cousins, and I'll be stuck with the Trump-supporting, QAnon conspiracy theorist boyfriend. 

People fall off those boats all the time.

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Yep... We were coming back on the ferry from Playa as your boat was going out to sea.   Pretty much exactly how I feel now that I'm home about the trip overall.   The Cozumel stop excursion was the highlight of trip.   I finally said fuck it last yesterday and drank my 15 drinks.   Spread it out from noon to midnight and found a bartender who would make real drinks.  I wasn't hungover this morning but I do regret that. 
One of the things Carnival does a bad job of is using the ship's spaces adequately.   In the main theater, they filled it up during the day with Bingo and cheesy Dating Game things.   Why not show a movie during the day for those that don't want to sit on deck when they do the night time ones?   The comedians only did night time shows.  There were two on board who each did 2/4 nights and two shows a night.   The room they worked in was closed until the evening.   Besides the comedy, they did karaoke in there a few times.  There's a piano bar that is only open 3/4 nights and then only from about 8:00-midnight.   Only one piano player so I can see why that happens but why not bring on another.  
I know, I know. They do studies and have figured out what works best at what time but for those who don't want to sit outside by a shitty pool filled with entirely too many people, cruising is not the thing to do.   It did not help that temperatures were in the mid to upper 90s  and humid as hell for the whole trip.  I can sit at home in my backyard and do that for free with much cheaper drinks and better food.  
Well, you were on Carnival going out of Galveston. You want a better experience, you got to pay up a little more. Ships like Royal Caribbean's Harmony of the Seas have those daytime activities that you aren't tied to a pool and a much bigger boat so it's not as crowded.
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18 hours ago, HornPhD said:

We're going on an Alaska cruise next month with my wife's mother and sister (plus her kids and boyfriend). My wife will get quality time with her mom and sister, our kids will have a blast with their cousins, and I'll be stuck with the Trump-supporting, QAnon conspiracy theorist boyfriend. 

Having to listen to anyone spout off political BS regardless of their team on a vacation is very no bueno, and would get a, Hey how about shutting the fuck up about the politics shit while we're on vacation, mmmmkay punkin'.

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  • 4 weeks later...
  • 2 years later...

Just got off the phone with her.  They are waiting to get into their room and in her words.  "I am sitting in a shitty dinning room with my luggage, lunch was awful, and I am already regretting this trip.  Why did we get on so damn early" Backstory MIL is a cruise person, she was really wanting to go on a trip and guilted the wife into going.  So wife goes and so far is not impressed at all, says it is like circus circus in Vegas and reminds her of the movie Wall-E.  They are on a Carnival boat, the Breeze I think, going to Cozumel and back. 

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Just got off the phone with her.  They are waiting to get into their room and in her words.  "I am sitting in a shitty dinning room with my luggage, lunch was awful, and I am already regretting this trip.  Why did we get on so damn early" Backstory MIL is a cruise person, she was really wanting to go on a trip and guilted the wife into going.  So wife goes and so far is not impressed at all, says it is like circus circus in Vegas and reminds her of the movie Wall-E.  They are on a Carnival boat, the Breeze I think, going to Cozumel and back. 
Tell her to bring her expectations WAY down and just enjoy the journey. It's Carnival. It's like walking into Walmart expecting a Saks Fifth Ave. experience.
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1 hour ago, Both Tacos said:
6 hours ago, Moby Ric said:
Just got off the phone with her.  They are waiting to get into their room and in her words.  "I am sitting in a shitty dinning room with my luggage, lunch was awful, and I am already regretting this trip.  Why did we get on so damn early" Backstory MIL is a cruise person, she was really wanting to go on a trip and guilted the wife into going.  So wife goes and so far is not impressed at all, says it is like circus circus in Vegas and reminds her of the movie Wall-E.  They are on a Carnival boat, the Breeze I think, going to Cozumel and back. 

Tell her to bring her expectations WAY down and just enjoy the journey. It's Carnival. It's like walking into Walmart expecting a Saks Fifth Ave. experience.

Oh yeah, expectations are down.  We are not cruise people, and she is used to a different type of vacation.  She will make the best of it.

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Hopefully she will laugh about this some day and remind you of the time she endured a sea of manatees at the pool and well as half drunk elephants at the buffet. My mother is a cruiser -goes three or four times a year. Don’t know why bc she does not fit the stereotype. Guess it’s an easy way for her to see places.

She recently brought up she wanted to take the whole family on a cruise. I quickly reminded her the only time my wife (gf at the time) and I were on a cruise, we packed our bags and got off at the first port and flew home a week later to meet up with other family members that stayed on the ship.

You made the correct choice by not going. Cruise ships are worse then Walmart.


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So update.  The wife would kill if she knew I was sharing this.  They go to dinner, and they have a family sitting with them.  The son in the family has a mental handicap.  While I would never make fun of this, the fucker asked my wife to be his "bed companion" for the night.  She refused, and he then he proceeded to ask her mom.  She said no too, but JFC, do Have to worry about retards hitting on my wife all week now?  Don't answer that, I already know.  They are back in the room at 9pm, and grateful they have TCM on the TV.

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Hopefully she will laugh about this some day and remind you of the time she endured a sea of manatees at the pool and well as half drunk elephants at the buffet. My mother is a cruiser -goes three or four times a year. Don’t know why bc she does not fit the stereotype. Guess it’s an easy way for her to see places.

She recently brought up she wanted to take the whole family on a cruise. I quickly reminded her the only time my wife (gf at the time) and I were on a cruise, we packed our bags and got off at the first port and flew home a week later to meet up with other family members that stayed on the ship.

You made the correct choice by not going. Cruise ships are worse then Walmart.


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Not if you spend $$$ on a better cruise line like Royal Carribean.
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1 hour ago, Moby Ric said:

So update.  The wife would kill if she knew I was sharing this.  They go to dinner, and they have a family sitting with them.  The son in the family has a mental handicap.  While I would never make fun of this, the fucker asked my wife to be his "bed companion" for the night.  She refused, and he then he proceeded to ask her mom.  She said no too, but JFC, do Have to worry about retards hitting on my wife all week now?  Don't answer that, I already know.  They are back in the room at 9pm, and grateful they have TCM on the TV.

 

that guy is a fucking stud !!! i would have fell out of my chair laughing so hard 

if you ask enough women, someone will say yes. his strategy is slightly flawed though, they're not nearly drunk enough yet. 

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8 hours ago, Both Tacos said:
13 hours ago, Moby Ric said:
Just got off the phone with her.  They are waiting to get into their room and in her words.  "I am sitting in a shitty dinning room with my luggage, lunch was awful, and I am already regretting this trip.  Why did we get on so damn early" Backstory MIL is a cruise person, she was really wanting to go on a trip and guilted the wife into going.  So wife goes and so far is not impressed at all, says it is like circus circus in Vegas and reminds her of the movie Wall-E.  They are on a Carnival boat, the Breeze I think, going to Cozumel and back. 

Tell her to bring her expectations WAY down and just enjoy the journey. It's Carnival. It's like walking into Walmart expecting a Saks Fifth Ave. experience.

Exactly. Carnival is the low rent cruise line.

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10 hours ago, Moby Ric said:

So update.  The wife would kill if she knew I was sharing this.  They go to dinner, and they have a family sitting with them.  The son in the family has a mental handicap.  While I would never make fun of this, the fucker asked my wife to be his "bed companion" for the night.  She refused, and he then he proceeded to ask her mom.  She said no too, but JFC, do Have to worry about retards hitting on my wife all week now?  Don't answer that, I already know.  They are back in the room at 9pm, and grateful they have TCM on the TV.

TCM in the stateroom.  Man...she really IS living the dream!

Tots and pears, my friend.

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I hope she's not shopping.  She's probably bringing you home one of those oversized Invicta "divers" watches.

The only tolerable place on that ship is one of those half shell cabana lounges on the Serenity deck.

Also, tell her to go to the steakhouse and get the "art at the table" desert, it's mildly amusing.

I tried to be a cruise fan, gave it my honest effort, but failed.

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