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Yoga Chick Lost in Hawaii -- Story Seems Off


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4 minutes ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

Literally every Hawaiian knows that if you are lost you just head downhill. No matter where you are on Maui, or any other island, if you just head downhill, you will hit a road or the beach in a few hours. Yes, it's harder going in some places than others, but Maui is not the Big Island size-wise or Kauai in terms of wilderness....So...17 freaking days?

Truth.  Mauka.  Makai.

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5 minutes ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

Literally every Hawaiian knows that if you are lost you just head downhill. No matter where you are on Maui, or any other island, if you just head downhill, you will hit a road or the beach in a few hours. Yes, it's harder going in some places than others, but Maui is not the Big Island size-wise or Kauai in terms of wilderness....So...17 freaking days?

Yep. Just went to Maui. If she didn't fracture her leg until day 4 like someone mentioned, she could have walked 10 miles a day on her first day lost and found a road or trail. Fucking bizarre. It's a small goddamn island. 

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30 minutes ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

Literally every Hawaiian knows that if you are lost you just head downhill. No matter where you are on Maui, or any other island, if you just head downhill, you will hit a road or the beach in a few hours. Yes, it's harder going in some places than others, but Maui is not the Big Island size-wise or Kauai in terms of wilderness....So...17 freaking days?

Every place I've ever taught, it's a regular thing to see people looking for the 200-numbered rooms on the first floor, and the 100-numbered ones upstairs. Up and Down are hard.

Forget East-West-North-South. There are people who don't know left from right,  who think that maybe some rivers flow inland from the sea, who are shocked if you tell them you saw a hawk, but yeah, ghosts are real.

 

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1 hour ago, RDCanecutter said:

 

Forget East-West-North-South. There are people who don't know left from right,  who think that maybe some rivers flow inland from the sea,

 

That's MaC's point though.  No one knows East-West-North-South in Hawaii, because it basically doesn't exist.  If you tell someone to drive east while giving directions, they'll look at you like you're an idiot.  You tell them "drive makai" = drive towards the water or "drive mauka" = towards the mountains. (I lived there four years and I'd still have to look at a map to tell you if I lived on the east or west side of O'ahu.)  That's the big gigantic hole in her story.  She had to know that walking downhill, she was headed makai.  

Shit, even my wife could handle this system.

Edited by Beau Vine
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1 hour ago, RDCanecutter said:

Every place I've ever taught, it's a regular thing to see people looking for the 200-numbered rooms on the first floor, and the 100-numbered ones upstairs. Up and Down are hard.

Forget East-West-North-South. There are people who don't know left from right,  who think that maybe some rivers flow inland from the sea, who are shocked if you tell them you saw a hawk, but yeah, ghosts are real.

 

A buddy of mine did 20 years in the Navy. One of his duties was to oversee firearms practice. Yes, the Navy makes every sailor shoot a pistol once a year or so, often when they are at sea. This is not a marksmanship competition. They just want to see if you can shoot a gun, period -- they just hand it to you loaded, and you flip the safety and fire a clip into the sea and then hand it over. My buddy says every single dang year at least one of the sailors would manage to miss the fucking ocean. That was their target. The fucking ocean. Nope, every single year one of these geniuses would let one or more of our taxpayer-bought rounds fly in the air or into the deck.

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11 hours ago, DigglerontheHoof said:

She’s either lying or is amazingly stupid.

 

7 hours ago, Neonmoon said:

My wife could see the sunrise and still have no idea what direction to go. 

 

7 hours ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

Some people just have no business being in the woods.

 

7 hours ago, hayden_horn said:

people are dumbasses.

 

3 hours ago, TwiceHorn said:

Medically, there's no difference between a "break" and a "fracture." 

I'm on the fence on this one.  Smells fake but I've known women who've "lost" their phone in the purse or their glasses on their head.  WTF happened to the front of her ankles?

In regards to the fracture, I fractured my leg in a fall in Colorado back in 2001.

I didn't find out until 2004.

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6 hours ago, longhornmatt said:

I love my wife, but she is the reason I believe this story could be legit.  

Yep. My wife is pretty outdoorsy. Like going backpacking with just her sister and herself, going rock climbing, even hiking The Narrows while seven months pregnant kind of stuff. But even then a few weeks ago she asked me if you could put in to a river to float it and get back out at the same spot. So this story is totally believable.

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6 minutes ago, NotActuallyALonghorn said:

Yep. My wife is pretty outdoorsy. Like going backpacking with just her sister and herself, going rock climbing, even hiking The Narrows while seven months pregnant kind of stuff. But even then a few weeks ago she asked me if you could put in to a river to float it and get back out at the same spot. So this story is totally believable.

They had a river like that at Six Flags. 

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2 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

Does your deer lease have signs and trails all over it? Is it boarded by two streams?  Will walking down hill lead you out? Is it 2 miles away from a town? 15 miles from an airport?

If not, I don't know how your wife has survived out there.

She can scent  money in my wallet. That's how she always makes it back. 

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9 hours ago, MaybeACoordinator said:

A buddy of mine did 20 years in the Navy. One of his duties was to oversee firearms practice. Yes, the Navy makes every sailor shoot a pistol once a year or so, often when they are at sea. This is not a marksmanship competition. They just want to see if you can shoot a gun, period -- they just hand it to you loaded, and you flip the safety and fire a clip into the sea and then hand it over. My buddy says every single dang year at least one of the sailors would manage to miss the fucking ocean. That was their target. The fucking ocean. Nope, every single year one of these geniuses would let one or more of our taxpayer-bought rounds fly in the air or into the deck.

While at sea, isn’t firing into the air the same as firing into the ocean?  It’s basically maximizing hang time.

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1 hour ago, BurntEyes said:

I once fractured a wrist as a young teen.

Went in for x-rays at the local quicky med type place.

They sent me home.

Called my mom and said bring him back, he has a fractured wrist.

I don't know if there is an actual medical difference by definition but I have had more than my fair share of broken and fractured bones.

The doctors sure as shit referred to them as different things and pointed out the variances to me.

A broken bone and fractured bone are the same thing. The doc-in-the-box missed it when he looked at it. The radiologist read it later and found the fracture, called the doc and told him to bring you back. Happens every day.

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58 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

It's somewhat puzzling and entirely frustrating that nobody in the mainstream news seems to be challenging or questioning this lady's story. 

You want a world where the mainstream media calls someone a liar without any evidence? I would guess that some are questioning her story but they're not going to report their hourly progress.

"Today a woman was found after an extensive search after missing for 17 days. She's been brought to the hospital. She's obviously lying so hopefully we get to the bottom of this story so we can shame her ASAP. back to you, Ken"

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10 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

They don't and won't as they don't give a fuck about reporting what happened, it's about drama, clicks and views. Reality and truth be dammed, a female "survival' story pays the fucking bills.

Your statements contradict each other. the media loves it when someone is found to be lying. Take the Jussie Smollet story. At first, it was a black actor attacked by MAGA loving thugs. Great story.  Then the evidence shows that he was lying.  Even greater story. The media always wants to take a hero or victim down because they lied.  Always.

 

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38 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

It would be nice if the media in general used a tiny amount of critical thinking and skepticism relating to stories. This one or any.

They don't and won't as they don't give a fuck about reporting what happened, it's about drama, clicks and views. Reality and truth be dammed, a female "survival' story pays the fucking bills.

What we definitely needed on this site was yet another thread about the god damn media. Great job. 

 

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On 5/27/2019 at 10:22 AM, WhatTheBuck said:

A woman got lost? Yeah, that sounds totally implausible. Because women are known for their sense of direction. 

If it was a hoax, how would that have worked? Were the police in on it? Or did she hide from them for three days until they called off the search? What was the plan if they didn't call off the search? Were the rescuers in on it who were hired by the family to continue the search? Without her cell phone, was the rescue time and location set up in advance? How many people were involved in the conspiracy? And for how long? And for what end? A book or movie deal? Lost hikers, skiers, children, etc. get rescued from time to time. I don't recall seeing book and movie deals come out about them. Seems like a risky venture for an unlikely payoff. 

She really did fracture a limb. She required medical attention. Look at her feet. Does a woman intentionally do that to herself?

hawaii-6-ht-er-190525_hpEmbed_2_3x4_992.

How much did this whole exercise cost the family? They hired private rescue teams. They were offering a $50,000 reward. I haven't followed the story all that closely other than seeing a piece about it on CBS News over the weekend. But if her story has holes, I'd say the hoax theory has just as many. Maybe she's just a flake who got lost in the woods. 

Shouldn’t go hiking in the woods with large venous ulcers with no dressings.  SMH. 

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2 minutes ago, El Diablo said:

I think she just overslept.

It occurred to me that maybe she stepped out of our world and into the land of Faerie, the Sidhe, the Fair Folk, however they're known in Hawaii. Time there doesn't pass at the same rate as here. Maybe she thought she was gone an hour instead of 17 days, or vice-versa. Being a Yoga Instructor, it could be hard for her to remember details.

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