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Red Five

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Red Five last won the day on April 21

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  1. The really fun part with aging narcissists is that they have spent so long being 100% convinced that everything coming out of their mouths is the absolute truth... that when the crazy REALLY kicks in, they still think it must be true, because it's coming out of their mouth.
  2. Trump sure appreciated the whole red carpet roll out he got from Biden for two months. I'm pretty sure he motherfucks him on a daily basis to anyone who will listen. Even blaming all of his self-inflicted gunshot wounds on him. Who could have guessed it would turn out this way.
  3. A year from now when everything is really in shambles. "This is still Biden's fault! The damage he did was worse than we thought!"
  4. I think the first sentence answers much of the last one.
  5. This would be like if we fired Sark and hired Hulk Hogan or Carrot Top as head coach. And he immediately fired a ton of people and ran off a bunch of our best players. Season ticket sales crash, and the season opens with us starting off 0-3, losing each game by at least 40 points. "This is Sark's fault, not mine! Also, we're going to keep being shitty for a long time."
  6. So when Biden was president and the stock market was booming, Trump took credit for it. Now after he's been president for three plus months, and has single-handedly wrecked the market and our economy, it's Biden's fault.
  7. Everything about that is either a lie, wrong, or both. "The economy may suck now, but just wait until the monster tax hike kicks in and all the stores are empty."
  8. "Nice little career you have there. Be a real shame if something happened to it."
  9. You don’t know what you just did to a lot of us.
  10. Olivia Munn looked a lot more rude than I thought she was. Did she have a kid recently?
  11. I’ve changed my tune. Those guys are hilarious. When I need a pick me up sometimes I go over there just to read their hot takes on various topics. It’s amazing. Drink every time you read someone say “young man”, if you want to get plastered in about 30 seconds.
  12. He got Canada to fucking hate us and talk tons of shit about us publicly inside of 100 days.
  13. Alright democrats, here we go. This is something called an “opportunity”. Blast that shit everywhere. “Amazon was going to tell you how much extra taxes you’re paying because of Trump, before Trump begged Bezos to not do it.”
  14. That was another nonsensical answer for which they were not punished in the least. (Person holding the mic nods their approval, crowd cheers, move on to next question.)
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