Jump to content

RDCanecutter

Certifiably Surly
  • Posts

    14098
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    3

Everything posted by RDCanecutter

  1. I was kayaking down Barton Creek. Leslie was paddling a shiny canoe upstream. He said "HEY MAN YOU WANT A BEER." I said "Yeah!" Then Leslie gave me a beer.
  2. Well dammit. put him in some tight swim suit because we don't need the fish all getting anal cancer too. Seriously, nuke it from orbit.
  3. There but for the grace of God go I. Couple of decades ago, was not really into my job and ready to drift, Because I was a driftah, yeah. Anyway, had good record in Military Police, spoke OK Spanish. Border Patrol was hiring. I may not have still been in now, but shitty soul-killing encounters aren't exclusive to now. This dude wouldn't have cracked up unless he knew inside that many of his deeds were wrong.
  4. I expected more bass from Magua.
  5. MTG and Boebert are on my card if I ever get dropped into a bar brawl backed by two house reps. (Sorry Dems, y'all just wanna talk.) With these two women I'm guaranteed a win-- Boebert goes Feral Corpse Rat droppin to all fours and biting chunks outta shins, shakin her head and growlin, givin my pansy ass the safe opportunity to throw some cheap-shot throat punches. As more come at us I just turtle up until I hear MTG go into hulk mode, then gtf outta the way as she crashes past. Maybe open a beer and watch, then clock anybody on the back of the head who tries to get up. Stay down, fool, stay down. Meanwhile halfway across the wrecked room Boebert's still got those rat incisors going like fava beans and a nice Chianti sa sa sa, and MTG in her red rage has got her mitts on two kegs putting those Orangutan back muscles to work. Victory is inevitable but the danger is not over-- until the red mist leaves their minds, they are likely to turn on friend or foe. Best to throw a box of donuts out in the parking lot and ring the dinner bell,
  6. Check out Skippy deLachecul there at the end casting warding spells to see off attacks on his master.
  7. Splain Loocy. nm/I googled. Mireille or French cleavage. That came out after I did the basics, and right before it was looked down upon for accurately portraying mid-80's life, including the creeper professor.
  8. Oh Hell Yeah. https://give.utexas.edu/a-new-francais-interactif#donors We hit the target and are a little beyond, thanks to several of us and a big dog-chokin wad o cash there at the end by an anonymous high energy donor. Hey. Appreciate it. Will try my best to supply high-quality cartoons. Speaking of which, a raccoon and a possum would be comedic gold, and throw in a grackle and you've got a little hoodlum gang. The thing is, we've already got 9 main characters, half of whom could use more script time. This trio would be fun to draw with some Calvin n' Hobbes manic energy, their scruffy hides all spiked out. I make no promises, but I'll see what I can do. Thanks to every Surlyite who helped in present, past, or future.
  9. Good thing they put a rubber on that plastic prong, else youda been drippin with robot jizz on your Walk of Shame you lil hoochie.
  10. Sam Kinison likes the way you think. Mais non.
  11. Good idea. I may have to go rogue to accomplish it, but they knew that could happen when the hired me.
  12. Think of someone who lives off food carts and prefers to move after sunset.
  13. Word on la rue is that they are revealing a brand new character tomorrow. I am a cartoonist. I cartoon and I know things.
  14. It's the only way I dress, so yeah...
  15. Let's bust in next Dec. 7th and steal it.
  16. Depends on how early I started drankin.
  17. Just got a little more Ted Lasso-ish: Classmate mentioned me to the Club Treasurer (who was also one of my teachers,) she said they already had one international committee member, more would be welcome. I wrote that I'd be happy to do whatever they need. Now we wait.
  18. Yes they put it in writing-- but this was the vibe I dealt with during my one year teaching at A&M before I lit out for Mexico like a scalded dog. The campus is defined by anger and fear.
  19. Hate to break it to you, but Sixth Sense explains why they don't seem to see you.
  20. Well, according to the Mint they're already worth 300% face value. No chance of losing money if you ask for them in your change now.
  21. In theory, yes. We dropped Biloxi after hitting too many geese and thrown bottles. But we are adding Tallapoosa, Sylacauga, and Slap Out.
  22. In the past 8 months I have taken various Zoom classes with different teachers in Scotland. One group just had a bunch of resignations in admin, for whatever reason. They put out a call for applicants (these are paying jobs,) and I guess I was on the mailing list, because, technically, they asked me to apply too. I was joking about applying with a Scottish pal who also takes the classes, and he started pushing me to do it for real. Besides the probable illegality of it, and being thousands of miles away, and being middling in Gaelic still, the whole idea is hilariously insane and appeals to me. I think I need to binge-watch Ted Lasso, and either get drunk or sober up. Applications are on the 19th. Interviews are the 24th.
  23. Because Whoever has damning shit on everybody. Trump seems to be the only one who can't counter-scandal.
×
×
  • Create New...