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Tired Horn

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  1. They are spiritually an isolated, rural college with no women, and it's still the 1950s, and their Platonic ideal is the Junction Boys. Don't confuse their pathology with their conference affiliation.
  2. So, is that an admission that they shouldn't really have a copyright on the 12th man?
  3. If Darth Vader is available, I say we take him. He'd look cool as hell on the sidelines, he''s a proven motivator, we'd have the force choke option for opponents on critical plays, and the Force would make sure we never miss a field goal again.
  4. But of course. When you're stupid, that's your only frame of reference to understand the world. It's a hapless type of projection--If Aggie could imagine a non-stupid action, then they wouldn't be Aggie.
  5. They probably use their unparalleled Meat Judging capability to guide strength and conditioning. Scourton may have been slow but just think how well marbled he was. Advantage Aggie.
  6. I refuse to call it the Lone Star Showdown. From UT's perspective, it''s more like "The Lone Star Contractual Obligation to Humor Some Fucking Weirdos."
  7. Buzz got them so well he got the hell out of there.
  8. It's really, really not even close to incredible that they can be so pathetic. Pathetic is their brand. Whop, whoop.
  9. But was the air playing zone or man-to-molecule?
  10. A&M isn't eve remotely a sleeping giant. They're more a heavily sedated, cosplaying internet troll.
  11. That glossary says it all. A&M is so self absorbed that it has to catalogue every thought or action it has ever engaged in, and It actually thinks that collection of absurd drivel is meaningful. I mean, skim the damn thing. In aggregate, it's insane. Aggieland is an asylum for people who have willingly chosen not to know better.
  12. RT is a mediocre coach at best. We're just marking time until his inevitable firing. Might as well get it over with sooner rather than later.
  13. Well, in all honesty, how else do you explain it? We all know that cesspool Austin fails in every way compared to the glory that is College Station. I mean we don't even have a statue that exists to deposit pennies on. I'm sure our elephant walk would suck, and when's the last time we martyred actual students to a pagan ritual. It has to be money. JFC, we don't even have a dead Bevo cemetery with a scoreboard. I feel so unhip to be a Longhorn.
  14. I'd buy a Zeke token if it showed him getting busted up as center on the last stupid play of that Dallas at SF playoff game. That play epitomizes the futility of Dallas under Jerry.
  15. I think free agency has a lot to do with that. Talent gets spread around more, which makes it hard to develop and sustain a team that can rout anyone when it's on. Also, teams have come to take the draft much more seriously, which ended the days where the likes of Gil Brandt could pick up a high first round pick for a couple of stiffs.
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