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Tired Horn

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Everything posted by Tired Horn

  1. Cue Vince Lombardi's line about teams saying they were only a few plays away: "That's just how losers talk."
  2. What summed up his tenure to me is that he never had a winning record. And we're not talking 11-1 or 10-2 here. Not one lousy 7-5 season in his whole tenure. He's the only Texas coach in my lifetime who can claim that distinction.
  3. The Elk should make it to three years on that nickname alone. Aggy loves nicknames.
  4. Who puts themselves in this situation? Seriously. It's just obviously a stupid idea to have as interim coach for your bowl game a guy who has already been hired by someone else. He quite rightly is putting his future employer over his rump time with you. And then the Aggies start to complain about ethics? Jesus, Mary and Joseph. If you're going to be a chump, just be a chump. Don't advertise it.
  5. Maalik has to look out for himself first. He's not going to beat out Arch next year, either for starter or second string if Quinn returns. It's too bad all these kids can't realize their dreams, and I wish him the best of luck.
  6. Yeah, but Old Dominion sounds like it might be tradition-laden, so they probably figured he checks the all-important "Gets Aggy" box. That, and being desperate, too. They actually seem to be convincing themselves they'll get an entirely new, SEC champion team out of the portal.
  7. Well, at least a real jihad, however misguided it may be, is based on something other than a football game combined with a deeply in the closet, homoerotic affinity for weirdos dressed up like milkmen. So, I don't know exactly what you'd call A&M's ongoing struggle with reality. Maybe a psychotic break? Decompensation? Tragically laughable?
  8. But what we don't understand is that Elko "gets A&M." (God help him.)
  9. The Hall of Champions is my personal favorite. Although it really should have Jimbo's national championship plaque enshrined with the date now forever blank.
  10. Just clearing out the chaff so the gold can shine. Advantage Aggie... Texas A&M--84 years of just enough occasional semi-success to keep the witless rubes in line, keep fucking backwards hillbilly shit like Yell Practice alive, and have them pining for half-ass, pagan acts of arson that probably won't kill them in any given year.
  11. Maybe we can just agree that Aggie is the green bean of college football: utterly common, inexplicably nostalgic to older people, and ultimately failing to deliver a satisfactory experience to those partaking of them.
  12. Green beans are edible, but that's about as far as it goes. They are, however, about the most truthfully and unimaginatively named vegetable.
  13. BECUZ WERE RICH, AND A BLUE-BLOOD IN OUR OWN MINDS! EVERBODY WANTS TO PLAY AT TEXAS A&M (except for a lot of our current players who were never any good and we let experience the wonders of Aggyland out of the goodness of our heart). WOOP!!!
  14. He's actually making Lochlan look pretty good by comparison.
  15. My favorite part of Aggie in the fetal position is the constant mantra that they want only guys who really want to be Aggies. Good luck with that you fucking idiots.
  16. Great Aggy quote: "So if you stay here you're getting a new position coach...if you transfer, you're getting a new position coach. That's why I don't get it." Seeing College Station in your rear view mirror is priceless for normal people. I knew a Physics PhD who taught two semesters at A&M. His verdict: "I'd have taught Kindergarten in Siberia to get out of there."
  17. That's 'Don't care, got Jimbo--Who?"
  18. Everybody should tell Aggy to fuck off and leave.
  19. I'm afraid I have to disagree. A monkey trying to fuck a football would be a pretty smooth operation by comparison.
  20. Are both teams really at less than 100 yards of offense at the half?
  21. Is Plummer rally this bad, or did someone drug him before the game?
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