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closetojumping last won the day on September 23
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81392 Surly 1%About closetojumping

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The only reason I didn’t have my Ole Miss pick as a top 2 pick is due to the coaching change. I didn’t go insane and pick Tulane though. Just marked the game down to the mid 30’s.
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You’re being grim about some of the needs. Can quality guys not get promoted to the starting lineup anymore? Are we just perpetually fucked unless starters only come from the portal? Why the fuck did we pay for all of this talent at DB if it’s all worthless? Are we writing Barnes off already? Your premise on Williams is great and all, but have you actually looked at his game by game stats? He was great in that one game last year against Georgia. He had a few other good games. Then the book was out on him - rough him up early and he starts hearing footsteps and bitches out quickly. The guy has attitude issues, drop issues, and he’s meek in size. Can all of that be turned around somewhere else for the low low price of $1M+? I’d rather let someone else figure that out. If Texas needs a WR1, there are better options already out there and will probably be more heading into the portal on 1/2/26.
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2025 Texas Coaching/Support Staff Thread
closetojumping replied to RaysBoomBoomRoom's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Do we have to do this?- 2794 replies
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Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
closetojumping replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
That dude is on the Dallas roster? I guess that tracks. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
closetojumping replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Hahahaha. What?!? That dude is a mediocre college qb. @HenryJames called him freshman Sam Ehlinger in a text chain last night and that’s about as accurate of a description as I have read. Dude has no accuracy beyond 5 yards, doesn’t know what he’s doing half the time and can be used as a battering ran into the teeth of a defense for almost unlimited carries, irrespective of effectiveness. If that dude leaves for the pros and actually gets drafted, I will explode into laughter. Mark whoever does take him as a dead man walking at GM and a terrible franchise. That reminds me, which idiot and franchise took Joe Milton? I remember laughing about that one at the time. That dude, as bad as he sucked, was a far better prospect than John Matarded. -
2025 Texas Coaching/Support Staff Thread
closetojumping replied to RaysBoomBoomRoom's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Okay, come on now. I know I’m not the only poster who vagabonds to other boards on a regular basis, including aggie boards. I know we have some true idiots in our base and on the boards, but we’re a massive fanbase. We also have some pretty bright posters and fans. When I visit other boards, I can find plenty of dummies, too. However, outside of Notre Dame, Michigan, UF, and USC boards, it gets really difficult to identify virtually any signs of intelligent life. I know this is a given to many here, but saying it anyway - SECRant/Tigerdroppings is perhaps the largest single collection of people with a collective IQ below 90 this side of an Appalachian swap meet or a Russian Federal Assembly session.- 2794 replies
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Hadn’t read this thread in a week… ”oh yeah, I’ll click on that thread to see if there are any pertinent updates I missed with the team” … clicks thread … -hagbard celine’s descent into some form of madness continues to unfold on a post by post, thread by thread basis -more whining about the bowl game not mattering -apparently Michael Taffe needs to fuck off for considering his options for his best future outcomes -more terribly unfunny AI garbage -the Burlsworth Award committee all needs to climb in a car and have the driver fall asleep at the wheel on a two lane, rural highway -some relevant team updates Thanks, guys!
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2025 Texas Coaching/Support Staff Thread
closetojumping replied to RaysBoomBoomRoom's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
You are the first person on this site to actually touch on why PK was “fired” and didn’t resign. The people clutching their pearls over Sarkisian running down Kwiatkowski after his departure may never understand what Sarkisian actually did for the guy.- 2794 replies
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He sucked in the second half of last year and he’s sucked almost all of this year. He’s a pussy and he’s soft. He’ll command 7 figures and then cry on the sidelines with his painted fingernails about how he’s been wronged for not getting targeted after multiple drops in each game. Bama fans are cheering him to the portal.
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2025 Texas Coaching/Support Staff Thread
closetojumping replied to RaysBoomBoomRoom's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Fair. Try ordering a manhattan or martini England or Europe. It’s a running joke with my wife that I know better and still insist on asking for them. Most places are lost from the jump on either request. It’s mildly infuriating. -
2025 Texas Coaching/Support Staff Thread
closetojumping replied to RaysBoomBoomRoom's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Keep it saying it, and you’ll keep being wrong. Sarkisian is not on the hot seat. He didn’t fire anyone due to pressure and he won’t be doing that any time soon. People are unhappy with his off field transgressions and he knows it, but he’s not being threatened due to performance. The guy just went to two semifinals and this year they were a candidate for the playoffs even with 3 losses. Coaches not on the hot seat replace coordinators all the time and you guys are fucking clowns for arguing otherwise.- 2794 replies
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2025 Texas Coaching/Support Staff Thread
closetojumping replied to RaysBoomBoomRoom's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Muschamp was instrumental in signing multiple high 4 star and 5 star defensive players after the bag game had become a useful tool for multiple other programs. Those guys signed and played at Texas for free. Yet there are people here knocking him as a recruiter and evaluator of talent. Muschamp was critical for pushing Georgia over the top in their title runs with some of the best defenses in modern history and he was Saban’s defensive protege who Saban still counts among his close friends in the coaching world. Yet there are people here knocking his coaching acumen.- 2794 replies
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2025 Texas Coaching/Support Staff Thread
closetojumping replied to RaysBoomBoomRoom's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I spent 2 years in college waiting tables at Pappasito’s. If you think for a second that just saying the word “fajitas” and that being that for the order is a thing, you are getting mocked and laughed at in the restaurant kitchen by your server and his/her friends after attempting it. I imagine you are a running gag for any server waiting on you, but this would add to it. I had a guy insist one time on ordering only “fajitas” and he told me to educate myself when I asked for clarity. I got written up when he complained about initially receiving vegetable fajitas as his entree. It was worth it.- 2794 replies
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2025 Texas Coaching/Support Staff Thread
closetojumping replied to RaysBoomBoomRoom's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Sadly, it appears that I order way more manhattans and martinis in public than either of you. I’ve ordered both from bartenders all over this country and they will ask for clarity or often just make a manhattan with bourbon. Most default a martini to vodka or ask which way as well. This really isn’t even a discussion. If you think I’m off on it, try ordering from different places than your frequent hangout. -
Hard pass on Isaac Brown. He’s another guy that doesn’t understand the difference between being hurt and being injured. He’s an outstanding talent, but he was getting bad advice this fall and listening to it. Texas just let a RB walk with these same issues.
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