
Professor Chesney
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Texas A&M Recruiting 2026: The World's Drunkest Elk
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I’m not going to dispute the laziness of my take that “it’s always been this way so it will be this way next season.” But for A&M there always seems to be some aspect of the program that performs above our expectations. For example, their O Line last year should have been abysmal, with some (including me) expecting Strong 2014 levels of ineptitude. But somehow it played better than the sum of its parts and exceeded expectations, particularly with decent run blocking bolstered by QB run threat. I don’t know how much my analysis of A&M is tainted by a subconscious desire to see a hilarious meltdown, so I try to counteract that. You’re right, I did not realize the talent level at Auburn. Missouri I still don’t buy. Penn St fans didn’t seem to have too much angst about Pribula leaving, and he’d really have to develop as a passer in order to unlock that offense. To be fair to Missouri, they did get Connor Weigman’s one good game last season, which was a massive performance outlier. And now Elko won’t be able to engage starting QB chicanery to force teams to work on multiple defensive game plans. -
Texas A&M Recruiting 2026: The World's Drunkest Elk
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Like every year, we are going to overestimate the number of a&m losses. They’ll get the benefit of good schedule timing, some lucky breaks, and will end up 8-4. Here are my thoughts. Two highly likely losses: ND and Texas. Away games against more talented teams. One highly likely loss with caveat: LSU, unless LSU implodes. A&M benefits by having this game later in the schedule. LSU seems to be the more talented team on paper, but LSU has a rough schedule that may have their fans turn on Brian Kelly and derail the season. They open with Clemson, and half to play Florida, Ole Miss and South Carolina before A&M. I could see them dropping three of those games and the team quitting. But if they survive, A&M is toast. This game is at the swamp and LSU plays Vandy the week prior. Two possible losses: Florida and South Carolina. Not sure if the Florida hype is warranted, but both of these teams have elite QBs. A&M probably splits these. The rest of the schedule is favorable. Missouri got crushed with a better team last year, and Arkansas never beats A&M. 8-4 -
NBA Offseason Thread 2025 - Fuck OKC
Professor Chesney replied to Message Board User's topic in Basketball
Maybe they know the NBA will put its thumb on the scales to get them Cam Boozer -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Gerry subtly dropped Ojo from “4 Star++” to just a “4 Star+”. Basically kiss of death. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Did you know: Cats sometimes hallucinate because their brains produce more serotonin than any other neurotransmitter. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I’m glad they’re choosing to blow all of their budget on 5-Star RBs and Carson Beck’s car insurance premiums -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Gerry knew James Johnson‘s announcement date before anyone else and before it was publicly announced. Sure NIL counteroffers from other schools at the last minute could change things, but that’s a good sign. -
Mack Brown Tarheel Football: The Orange Slice Boogaloo
Professor Chesney replied to Machinator's topic in Football
The only reason this wasn’t a bigger deal at the time was because he had done such a lazy and half-ass job building the class up to that point. There weren’t that many good players who could decommit and pick a better school than Texas. Hell, the best player from that class was Poona Ford, and Charlie Strong brought him over last minute. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Per OTF, sounds like he is now announcing June 28th -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Straight face comparing Hawaii to Galveston is uncharted territory and peak offseason. In the late July summer doldrums when this board is yet again reliving the greatest losses in the Tom Herman era while Satya is furiously fapping in the corner, we will be looking back fondly on these days. Well done. -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Delicious. You have to love the cognitive dissonance displayed bitching about NIL. Texas is only signing DTs because of NIL. But we signed JeRalyan McCoy because he just loves our school and believes Billy is the best darn coach in the land.- 8337 replies
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Texas A&M Recruiting 2026: The World's Drunkest Elk
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Your boy Hayes isn’t doing Elk any favors with that filter… -
Texas Recruiting Notes 2026: Boulevard of Broken Bagmen
Professor Chesney replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Gerry seems more passive aggressive in this update than normal -
Texas Offseason 2025 - Archmania Is Upon Us
Professor Chesney replied to Vertigo's topic in Football
Yes. I still have PTSD from that last trip to DC. Dreary day, polite and unenthusiastic opposing fans, and I swear there was some kind of rain delay that caused everyone to get blackout drunk. But that might have been a hallucination. -
OU Football 2025 - League Average & Loving It
Professor Chesney replied to closetojumping's topic in Football
Great analysis / content. Is anyone else struggling to reconcile OU’s talent and projection with how poorly they played in Dallas last year? The PFF grades, stats, and eye test in other games clearly show a lot of talent on the DL, and arguably in the secondary. I also respect Venables’s defensive game planning and expect that to improve this year, even though he does look like a desiccated husk of a youth pastor. But man, they looked terrible in Red River and were lucky the score wasn’t worse. Even in the first few series where they played the best and had a great script, they survived some Ewers overthrows and pocket anxiety. And when the game was still in the balance in the second quarter, this statically amazing defense got shredded in the ground by our statistically mediocre running game. This is emphasized by that great shot of RSJ tripping and falling down when trying to tackle Wisner (Bowen was out of position and out of frame). On the team outlook, I would argue that you’re slightly understating the talent on the DL, and maybe even too optimistic on their LB core. The DL is what A&M wishes they had, although MJJr will be comically negative and take playing time away from better players. On the flip side, Stutsman did a lot for that defense in terms of getting the team organized and being in the right spot even if he did not make a play. Texas game aside, he didn’t take many false steps and allowed the rest of the defense to play faster. I think they’re really going to miss him this season.
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