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NeverMarryAStripper

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by NeverMarryAStripper

  1. This is just another liberal conspiracy to undermine the oil and gas industry here in our great state
  2. I would do that too if there were people that I liked, but my dog rarely flies unaccompanied
  3. In an intellectual battle between Ted Cruz and a Barbie, Ted is at a severe disadvantage
  4. All four can go as far as I'm concerned
  5. I remember how excited I was when I upgraded my modem from 300 baud to 1,200 baud.
  6. They are the exact same file format. Earlier versions of Windows only allowed a three-character file extension so Joint Photographic Experts Group (JPEG) files were shortened to JPG for Windows.
  7. Marry twins, and everyone will think that you just have one wife. Plus, if one gets to uppity, you can just kill her and bury her in the back yard and nobody will know.
  8. People who call the access road either the feeder or the frontage
  9. Seems like the lawsuit should have been filed in Qatar. Ha Ha Ha.
  10. Ha Ha Ha. Good luck getting a title company to cover anything under one of their policies. They exist to fuck people out of money.
  11. Their drink payment system was probably designed by the same guy that designed their scheduling system, so it probably doesn't work most of the time
  12. On the bright side they're probably not staying at your house now
  13. We now have the AGM-158 LRASM. It's a much longer-range missile than the Harpoon and stealthy. They were working on fitting them to the P-8A, but I don't know if they are operational yet.
  14. The P-8A was upgraded a couple of years ago to carry the AGM-84 Harpoon.
  15. That's because they have to drive to work in Houston traffic with the worst drivers on the planet.
  16. You should never invest in a company dumb enough to hire you
  17. Airlines should just make it a policy that if you board in a wheelchair, then you have to disembark in a wheelchair for liability purposes. Of course, in order to get the wheelchairs to the ramp, they have to let all of the non-wheelchair people disembark first.
  18. My mom has three units. They are each a self-contained unit that's on the roof of her townhouse, so there is nothing in the attic. All three units were replaced 13 years ago, and they had to be lifted to the roof with a crane. The upstairs unit quit working a few weeks ago, so I called someone to come out and take a look at it. His diagnosis was a shot compressor, and he recommended that the entire unit be replaced. Of course, he also said since all three units were the same age and needed a crane to install them, she might as well replace them all. His estimate was $46K. After I said thanks but no thanks, I called a second guy to come out. The second guy's diagnosis was a bad thermostat. He replaced the thermostat, and it's been humming along fine since then. He also told me that he could replace all three units for a fraction of the other guy's estimate and to give him a call if they ever really needed to be replaced.
  19. The US developed several versions of enhanced radiation weapons that were deployed operationally on tactical ballistic missiles. The last ones were retired in the 90s.
  20. So you’re saying that they made an episode of hoarders about you?
  21. If we really had actual alien spacecraft and alien bodies and the guys who testified before Congress actually had the information, there would have been a fatal car accident, a sudden suicide, and maybe an unexplained fall from a window long before those guys actually made it in to testify. The fact that they are still walking the earth means that they don't know shit, or that there is nothing for them to know.
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