How old are your kids @Dnaguy ? Until the kids are teenagers it’s really fucking hard. Kids hang on mom and demand from her in ways you can’t really imagine or fully understand even when you witness it. That shit wears moms down, even the best moms. And the bad moms, it can be worse, they do less and are demolished by the demands even more. And I haven’t mentioned full time working moms yet. Holy shit that is an impossible task. And I think these demands on her that have nothing to do with you can really cloud a marriage. I think it’s super shitty your vulnerability was met with disdain, I think that’s awful, but I imagine she’s full on care taking. I think what I see from my guy friends is similar to what you express, deep feelings of neglect and need, and unfortunately all she feels is another human that needs her to be the emotional rock. It’s not a death sentence for your marriage but it does seem that for most marriages, until the kids are full on teenagers, the marriage and the adults in the room often run at a consistent deficits. You do the best you can, you try for nights like you just had and you hold on always trying to cut your partner some slack and hope she does the same. But I’ll tell you this, the more of the load she feels is up to her that you can carry the more she’s going to turn back toward you, assuming it’s not all lost (and if she’s fucking you I have a hard time seeing it all lost). But your time line and the timeline that is realistic may not match. It’s also possible work and motherhood will break her. I know some that have fallen in the alcoholism hole, or worse. So it’s not guaranteed to get better. So, I’m not here to tell you what to do, but together or divorced your and her lives will get much easier when the kids get older. What that looks like for each of you (whether this period breaks you or not) and your marriage is an open question.