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Trivial things that make you surly


elfenix

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1 hour ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Sounds more like it oughtta be yer a fucking girly dad....

It's mom, dad, boy, girl, sister, brother, grandma, and grandpa, mea maw, and pupaw gott dammit....  Your mea maw, and pupaw results may vary.

Tell that to Michael Huff at your own risk.

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2 minutes ago, mininghorn88 said:

Sorry, but I would have to take the butt whipping for Team Surly from Huff because I still think the term is stupid.

 

I completely agree.  I’m also not telling Huff that I think it’s stupid, so thank you for volunteering.

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5 hours ago, elfenix said:

"we are experiencing higher than normal call volume"

 

fuck you no you're not you're intentionally understaffing customer service because you want people to hang up.

That's right along the lines of being told by the server at a restaurant who has totally forgotten about you, "Sorry about the wait, we just got so busy for lunch today."  

Yeah, that weird thing humans do where they eat in the middle of the day.  That caught you and your manager totally off guard, did it?  (full disclosure-I was never a waiter, but did bus boy and bar back work for many years).  Tell me staff called in sick or you have a private party, but don't tell me you didn't see the wave of hungry people leaving their workplaces to come to your establishment for midday sustenance like they have for centuries.  

Other waitstaff one is, "So have y'all dined with us before?"  Who gives a shit?  Are you gonna treat me differently based on my answer.  And invariably, it leads to, "Well then, let me tell you how it works here..."  Uh, lemme guess.  I read back words to you on the menu, you bring them to me, and I consume them?  Do I have it about right?  Oh wait, sharing plates/family style/tasting menu?  Yeah, got it.  You serve food here like I've been eating at home for almost a half century.  I'm sure I'll figure it out somehow.  Can you help me out with the flatware while you're here...we just don't have this kinda fancy tool stuff where I come from?  I know their managers make 'em say that shit, but I think if we start chipping away at the bullshit, we'll all dine/serve happier.  Once that bullshit facade is over with, everything's great...I ask open ended questions of my dining mates, don't talk much, order way too much alcohol, and pickup the check 95% of the time.  /rant

 

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10 hours ago, Lobo said:

That's right along the lines of being told by the server at a restaurant who has totally forgotten about you, "Sorry about the wait, we just got so busy for lunch today."  

Yeah, that weird thing humans do where they eat in the middle of the day.  That caught you and your manager totally off guard, did it?  (full disclosure-I was never a waiter, but did bus boy and bar back work for many years).  Tell me staff called in sick or you have a private party, but don't tell me you didn't see the wave of hungry people leaving their workplaces to come to your establishment for midday sustenance like they have for centuries.  

Other waitstaff one is, "So have y'all dined with us before?"  Who gives a shit?  Are you gonna treat me differently based on my answer.  And invariably, it leads to, "Well then, let me tell you how it works here..."  Uh, lemme guess.  I read back words to you on the menu, you bring them to me, and I consume them?  Do I have it about right?  Oh wait, sharing plates/family style/tasting menu?  Yeah, got it.  You serve food here like I've been eating at home for almost a half century.  I'm sure I'll figure it out somehow.  Can you help me out with the flatware while you're here...we just don't have this kinda fancy tool stuff where I come from?  I know their managers make 'em say that shit, but I think if we start chipping away at the bullshit, we'll all dine/serve happier.  Once that bullshit facade is over with, everything's great...I ask open ended questions of my dining mates, don't talk much, order way too much alcohol, and pickup the check 95% of the time.  /rant

 

You’ve never been to bd’s Mongolian Grill. 

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16 hours ago, Lobo said:

That's right along the lines of being told by the server at a restaurant who has totally forgotten about you, "Sorry about the wait, we just got so busy for lunch today."  

Yeah, that weird thing humans do where they eat in the middle of the day.  That caught you and your manager totally off guard, did it?  (full disclosure-I was never a waiter, but did bus boy and bar back work for many years).  Tell me staff called in sick or you have a private party, but don't tell me you didn't see the wave of hungry people leaving their workplaces to come to your establishment for midday sustenance like they have for centuries.  

Other waitstaff one is, "So have y'all dined with us before?"  Who gives a shit?  Are you gonna treat me differently based on my answer.  And invariably, it leads to, "Well then, let me tell you how it works here..."  Uh, lemme guess.  I read back words to you on the menu, you bring them to me, and I consume them?  Do I have it about right?  Oh wait, sharing plates/family style/tasting menu?  Yeah, got it.  You serve food here like I've been eating at home for almost a half century.  I'm sure I'll figure it out somehow.  Can you help me out with the flatware while you're here...we just don't have this kinda fancy tool stuff where I come from?  I know their managers make 'em say that shit, but I think if we start chipping away at the bullshit, we'll all dine/serve happier.  Once that bullshit facade is over with, everything's great...I ask open ended questions of my dining mates, don't talk much, order way too much alcohol, and pickup the check 95% of the time.  /rant

 

So, where did you eat that gave you diarrhea?

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Guest Lobo

Pretty much everywhere but due mostly to problems.  Internal.  

No, I always go along with the questions and play nice because I do believe in the mantra of not fucking with the people that prepare and handle your food.

But the "got slammed today at lunch" and the "have you dined here before/lemme 'splain how we do things here" are trivial and they make me surly.  

I can listen to the specials, I can wait patiently for my food to arrive, I can help you turn your table and still tip 25%.  But what's hard for me to do in my old age is feign a modicum of polite attention while you describe the concept of shared side dishes in just a bit over 3 minutes.  

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17 hours ago, Lobo said:

That's right along the lines of being told by the server at a restaurant who has totally forgotten about you, "Sorry about the wait, we just got so busy for lunch today."  

Yeah, that weird thing humans do where they eat in the middle of the day.  That caught you and your manager totally off guard, did it?  (full disclosure-I was never a waiter, but did bus boy and bar back work for many years).  Tell me staff called in sick or you have a private party, but don't tell me you didn't see the wave of hungry people leaving their workplaces to come to your establishment for midday sustenance like they have for centuries.  

Other waitstaff one is, "So have y'all dined with us before?"  Who gives a shit?  Are you gonna treat me differently based on my answer.  And invariably, it leads to, "Well then, let me tell you how it works here..."  Uh, lemme guess.  I read back words to you on the menu, you bring them to me, and I consume them?  Do I have it about right?  Oh wait, sharing plates/family style/tasting menu?  Yeah, got it.  You serve food here like I've been eating at home for almost a half century.  I'm sure I'll figure it out somehow.  Can you help me out with the flatware while you're here...we just don't have this kinda fancy tool stuff where I come from?  I know their managers make 'em say that shit, but I think if we start chipping away at the bullshit, we'll all dine/serve happier.  Once that bullshit facade is over with, everything's great...I ask open ended questions of my dining mates, don't talk much, order way too much alcohol, and pickup the check 95% of the time.  /rant

 

This is a quality rant.

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17 hours ago, Lobo said:

That's right along the lines of being told by the server at a restaurant who has totally forgotten about you, "Sorry about the wait, we just got so busy for lunch today."  

Yeah, that weird thing humans do where they eat in the middle of the day.  That caught you and your manager totally off guard, did it?  (full disclosure-I was never a waiter, but did bus boy and bar back work for many years).  Tell me staff called in sick or you have a private party, but don't tell me you didn't see the wave of hungry people leaving their workplaces to come to your establishment for midday sustenance like they have for centuries.  

Other waitstaff one is, "So have y'all dined with us before?"  Who gives a shit?  Are you gonna treat me differently based on my answer.  And invariably, it leads to, "Well then, let me tell you how it works here..."  Uh, lemme guess.  I read back words to you on the menu, you bring them to me, and I consume them?  Do I have it about right?  Oh wait, sharing plates/family style/tasting menu?  Yeah, got it.  You serve food here like I've been eating at home for almost a half century.  I'm sure I'll figure it out somehow.  Can you help me out with the flatware while you're here...we just don't have this kinda fancy tool stuff where I come from?  I know their managers make 'em say that shit, but I think if we start chipping away at the bullshit, we'll all dine/serve happier.  Once that bullshit facade is over with, everything's great...I ask open ended questions of my dining mates, don't talk much, order way too much alcohol, and pickup the check 95% of the time.  /rant

 

Wow, you must have a lot of friends.

 

 

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On 7/2/2021 at 11:35 AM, deadshank said:

Jagoffs that approach an intersection with a red light and decide to cut into and then haul ass across an adjoining parking lot so they don't have to stop.

It is always nice when the light turns green and you get to drive by them when they get hung up by traffic and you get to drive by them while they're stuck in the lot trying to get back out on the main lanes.

True story from when I was with Austin Fire. This was about 35 years ago. 

Cruising down South Congress on a Code 3 run (lights and sirens) and coming up on the intersection where the Dan's Hamburgers was. Check the light, eye contact with all four drivers at the intersection, and it's clear. Floorboard the accelerator and see a guy cut into the Dan's parking lot. Can tell he's cutting the intersection. Lock up the brakes and when a fire truck locks up the brakes, it sounds like you've got a load of live pigs in the back. 

Guy bails out of the parking lot right in front of me. Typical asshole in a tie and wearing shades, looks up and sees that big ass truck bearing down on him, and if you've ever wondered what someone looks like when they see God coming, that was it. I got the truck stopped, but by that time I was so close I could see his lap through his car window. Course, when he saw what he'd done, he sat on the brakes and was parked right in front of us. He just sat there with his mouth open, staring at us. Pretty sure he actually shit when I hit the air horn. 

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On 7/2/2021 at 11:35 AM, deadshank said:

Jagoffs that approach an intersection with a red light and decide to cut into and then haul ass across an adjoining parking lot so they don't have to stop.

It is always nice when the light turns green and you get to drive by them when they get hung up by traffic and you get to drive by them while they're stuck in the lot trying to get back out on the main lanes.

The term for this person is an EssoAsso.  

 

Not a moby ric original

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Guess what we had this AM for our parking situation?

Took around ½ an hour to resolve, no cost to us. Some kind of breakdown between the parking lot ownership & the hotel here in New Orleans.

Last pic is the guy who unlocked & removed the lock.

Turns out it was only 1 number spin away on the 1st digit... I should have tried that on my own & swiped their boot.c9867d86caf3a3050f9712c0c6777641.jpg4e2ed47bb4909612128e834839a88d87.jpga10d6b59606a15ec40618cdd78b72c3b.jpg

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People that are on the phone all the time. 

Not like, at work, like people in their free time just jabbing away. Especially guys that do it. 

Drives me up the fucking wall. Who are you talking to? What needs to be said? Why don't you have anything else to do? 

And I find these people tend to just bitch about nonsense instead of actually putting any solutions into motion. 

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On 7/3/2021 at 9:30 AM, conVINCEd said:

Tell that to Michael Huff at your own risk.

2372407B-5A4F-49B0-8652-107BE1902BB6.jpeg

people who say nobody will love their daughter more than their father.  Wouldn't you hope their husband might?

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certain locks that take like fucking 5 rotations to engage.  or you have to turn it all the way, and then turn it back 2 turns to get the key out.  like what the fuck is this gear reduction mechanism and what does it have to do with security.

 

one of my doors only needs a quarter turn and the deadbolt will flick into place.  thats all it takes.

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On 7/6/2021 at 3:02 PM, elfenix said:

"we are experiencing higher than normal call volume"

 

fuck you no you're not you're intentionally understaffing customer service because you want people to hang up.

I can't understand about 90% of the "customer service" people these days anyhoo.  It's frustrating AF.

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8 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Why do you hate Indian people so much ?

I don't know their nationality.  They could be from Waxahachie for all I know...

It's bullshit trying to do business/ troubleshooting/ problem solving that way.  But hey, lookie at the Dow yesterday...

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15 hours ago, ROFL BOX said:

Guess what we had this AM for our parking situation?

Took around ½ an hour to resolve, no cost to us. Some kind of breakdown between the parking lot ownership & the hotel here in New Orleans.

Last pic is the guy who unlocked & removed the lock.

Turns out it was only 1 number spin away on the 1st digit... I should have tried that on my own & swiped their boot.c9867d86caf3a3050f9712c0c6777641.jpg4e2ed47bb4909612128e834839a88d87.jpga10d6b59606a15ec40618cdd78b72c3b.jpg

Sent from my SM-G950U1 using Tapatalk
 

Pics of parking douchebaggery thread is that way————>

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11 hours ago, ztejas said:

People that are on the phone all the time. 

Not like, at work, like people in their free time just jabbing away. Especially guys that do it. 

Drives me up the fucking wall. Who are you talking to? What needs to be said? Why don't you have anything else to do? 

And I find these people tend to just bitch about nonsense instead of actually putting any solutions into motion. 

There are a few women that do early morning loops in our neighborhood.  It is literally 5 AM and I’m out there doing my exercise bit and I pass them and they are on their phones blabbing with someone.  And they are blabbing LOUD.  You can hear them coming from a long way off. 
 

It is five freaking AM.  It’s dark outside. You’re walking. 
 

You. Have. To. Blab. On. The. Phone. 
 

 

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18 hours ago, Lobo said:

Pretty much everywhere but due mostly to problems.  Internal.  

No, I always go along with the questions and play nice because I do believe in the mantra of not fucking with the people that prepare and handle your food.

But the "got slammed today at lunch" and the "have you dined here before/lemme 'splain how we do things here" are trivial and they make me surly.  

I can listen to the specials, I can wait patiently for my food to arrive, I can help you turn your table and still tip 25%.  But what's hard for me to do in my old age is feign a modicum of polite attention while you describe the concept of shared side dishes in just a bit over 3 minutes.  

Eh let it go. It’s not the waiters fault.  The restaurant makes them do it and they can get mystery shopped.  It’s decent customer service.  Former waiter rant over

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8 minutes ago, DigglerontheHoof said:

image.jpeg.69fd27a357feeb587278d0be08bb18af.jpeg

One of my neighbors has a sign like this up for the mom of the family:  she's 40.  I mean, I get this type of stuff for a kid but an adult?  Seems attention whoreish to me. 

40 does deserve some in their face, you're getting old ribbing.   That's about the only time it's acceptable though.  

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50 minutes ago, deadshank said:

There are a few women that do early morning loops in our neighborhood.  It is literally 5 AM and I’m out there doing my exercise bit and I pass them and they are on their phones blabbing with someone.

Yeah, I see them on the trail after work too. Going .001 MPH yakking on the phone isn't exercise, Martha.

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9 hours ago, markstanco said:


Is that the place 15ish years ago up 75 in dallas? Man that was good. They just up and vanished. I think there was another one around the airport

There was one in Austin too.....I went once but when I saw the guy cooking over the wok and seasoning it with his head sweat I never went back.

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1 hour ago, closetohumping said:

Eh let it go. It’s not the waiters fault.  The restaurant makes them do it and they can get mystery shopped.  It’s decent customer service.  Former waiter rant over

I do let it go in real life.  That's why I ranted on a trivial surly thread that specifically asks for trivial rants.  I've worked in bars and restaurants, I know they're just following the manager schtick (like a verbal form of flair).  I'm polite, never linger at a table, and I never go below 20-25%.

Having said that, I didn't really think about the mystery shopper angle that makes them need to go through the whole schpeel. Then again, as I think about the dives I eat in, ain't no secret shopper shit going on.  

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8 minutes ago, Lobo said:

I do let it go in real life.  That's why I ranted on a trivial surly thread that specifically asks for trivial rants.  I've worked in bars and restaurants, I know they're just following the manager schtick (like a verbal form of flair).  I'm polite, never linger at a table, and I never go below 20-25%.

Having said that, I didn't really think about the mystery shopper angle that makes them need to go through the whole schpeel. Then again, as I think about the dives I eat in, ain't no secret shopper shit going on.  

No worries.  Yes, I find the "how about some delicious macaroni poppers to go with your electric margarita" spiel a bit annoying, but they're just covering their asses.  Still prefer those types to the "what do you want" waiters that hate life.  

 

But yes, I used to work at a place that did the mystery shop thing.  It was horrible.  "Why didn't you point out the blackboard specials?"  Because they said "we're ready and in a hurry."

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On 7/2/2021 at 10:43 PM, Patricio Swayze said:

The following terms:

Dog mom/dad. Fuck you and I hope you die in a car fire.

Girl dad. Fuck off, you are just a dad. I hate you. (Full disclosure, I have two daughters. They call me dad).

When did all of that crap start?  I'd never heard of the expression until I read it here.

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15 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

When did all of that crap start?  I'd never heard of the expression until I read it here.

The Vatican did a bunch of expensive market research.  When "Boy Father" merchandise hit some legal snags, they just pivoted to "Girl Dad" and recouped all of their expenses, and then some.  They haven't been around this long because they lack business savvy.  

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4 minutes ago, Lobo said:

The Vatican did a bunch of expensive market research.  When "Boy Father" merchandise hit some legal snags, they just pivoted to "Girl Dad" and recouped all of their expenses, and then some.  They haven't been around this long because they lack business savvy.  

JHC, I've lived too long...

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32 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

When did all of that crap start?  I'd never heard of the expression until I read it here.

I know a guy that prolifically uses the hashtag #cheerdad on facebook posts, as his 10 year old is in all sorts of cheer camps and competitions. He also likes to take pics of his vehicle being valeted at various Houston hotels. He's a fucking nincompoop.

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5 hours ago, Reynolds Woodcock said:

The Insert key on the keyboard. Who is using this button intentionally? Why does it exist? I accidentally hit it and in a few seconds I’ve written over an entire sentence, and, for some reason, have to “undo” letter by letter. /end corporate lawyer rant/

It's used for undoing accidentally hitting the insert key. 

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4 hours ago, smuggs said:

I know a guy that prolifically uses the hashtag #cheerdad on facebook posts, as his 10 year old is in all sorts of cheer camps and competitions. He also likes to take pics of his vehicle being valeted at various Houston hotels. He's a fucking nincompoop.

nincompop  

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