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Matt Gaetz: come for underaged interns; stay for the crushed viagra and redbull


Gil Bang

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11 minutes ago, 4th&Five said:

 

LOL, the stupid is strong as ever in MG. Drumpf never took covid seriously enough to attack it. covid will live beyond his presidency. it pains me to state that, would've rather that dotard coulda gotten a victory against this virus by early summer.

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  • 2 weeks later...
25 minutes ago, trauma babe said:

"It's actually a great honor to be confused for a different person by the President of the United States," or something like that.

“I’d been thinking of changing my name to Richard for some time now.  I told that to Dear Leader just before the rally.  We’re so close he called me by the more familiar and endearing, Rick.  He gave me the courage to make the change.  The China Virus has made him even more infallible.”

or something like that 

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So Trump is one more round of steroid injections away from calling Matt Gaetz, "Dickgate."  Which seems appropriate considering the Congressman's pending poolboy scandal.  

Reporter:  "Congressman Gaetz, how do you feel about President Trump using a wrong name for you repeatedly at his Ocala rally?"
Matt:  "What?  Didn't notice.  Oh wait, I bet he did that think where he calls me Rick Gates.  Oh man, he's such a cut-up." 

Reporter:  "Yes, Congressman.  He was frequently referring to you as Rick Gates.  You don't seem surprised." 

Matt:  "Oh man, this is so us.  You tell that Dennis Tramp that he's the President of Shenanigans as far as I'm concerned."  

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Looks like Rick wrote himself a book.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1642937649/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2B18DHPD5W0J8&dchild=1&keywords=matt+gaetz&qid=1595208453&s=books&sprefix=matt+gaetz,stripbooks,157&sr=1-1

41dgH1wfJ6L._SX329_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg

Quote

In a scathingly funny account of his time in the Washington swamp, Florida firebrand Matt Gaetz, one of President Trump’s key supporters in Congress, gleefully skewers the enemies of the MAGA revolution and lays out his own vision for the future of the populist movement.

Quote

Editorial Reviews
Review
“Matt is the voice of the MAGA movement in congress. FIREBRAND is the book that takes you behind the scenes in Washington like no other book. A must read!” -- Donald J. Trump Jr.

“Congressman Matt Gaetz has established himself as a brave new voice on the national stage. His support for the president in congress is unmatched. If you want to read about the real story, FIREBRAND is the book of the season!” -- Kimberly Guilfoyle

“Matt Gaetz is the funniest, most colorful FIREBRAND in Congress. President Trump loves him and relies on him to fight.  Enjoy these exciting journeys with MAGA warriors and enlist in Gaetz’s adventure to save America.” -- Sean Hannity

About the Author
Matt Gaetz is currently serving his second term as the US Representative for Florida's 1st congressional district. A native of Florida, he earned a JD from William & Mary Law School and served in the Florida legislature before being elected to Congress in 2017. Matt is a member of the House Armed Services Committee and the House Judiciary Committee. In 2019, he introduced the “Green Real Deal,” a plan to address climate change by harnessing the power of free markets, embracing technological innovation and entrepreneurship, and cutting excessive governmental red tape.

Scathingly funny. I'm certain they wouldn't lie to me. 

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16 minutes ago, JimmyJames said:

He was forged of a hotter fire.

That would explain all the time Matt's spent around the Little League fields this past summer.  

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2 hours ago, Blotto said:

Title page proofreader misspelled "FUCKWAD".  

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  • 3 weeks later...
3 hours ago, South Austin said:

Am I too naive to want him to run for president in 2024?

He's totally running unless Don Jr. takes over the party and runs.  Gaetz and Hawley are going to be the young Trumpists going for it in 4 years.  Hawley going after the faux-intellectual wing, and Gaetz the bro candidate.  

Edited by A-Tex Devil
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  • 3 weeks later...

I guess I missed this part.  What did he get arrested for?

 

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U.S. Rep. Matt Gaetz took a jab at Hunter Biden’s past substance abuse during Thursday’s House impeachment hearings, leading a Democratic colleague to call the Pensacola Republican a hypocrite.

The dust-up started when the Pensacola Republican sought to insert Biden’s name into the articles of impeachment — the latest attempt to redirect the investigation in President Donald Trump to Vice President Joe Biden and his son’s employment with Burisma, a Ukrainian natural gas company.

 

Edited by Bullneck
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  • 4 weeks later...

Dear Trump Death Cult member,

As of today 328,473 American dreams have been eternally taken away from our fellow citizens due to deliberate inaction. This came from members of your cult screaming from the highest rooftops that it was a hoax. To the families left behind to pick up the pieces it was not a hoax. It was a nightmare without a discernible end. 
 

Christmas or any other holiday they celebrated was also forever cancelled because of your death cult leader and his severe narcissism and lack of any empathy whatsoever.  Most would see that behavior and say it was heartless and without emotion. Quite the Grinch indeed.

Signed,

On behalf of those who cannot speak for themselves anymore.

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21 minutes ago, Beau Vine said:

Chick in red is pretty hawt, but she doesn't realize Gaetz is gay...

 

Tried the ole long fingernail back scratch to get his attention.

He was having none of it.

Any straight man knows what the fuck that shit means, and would have responded with at least an arm around her waste.

Dude’s gayer than christmas.

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8 minutes ago, Dnaguy said:

 

Tried the ole long fingernail back scratch to get his attention.

He was having none of it.

Any straight man knows what the fuck that shit means, and would have responded with at least an arm around her waste.

Dude’s gayer than christmas.

Are you suggesting that this is not how a heterosexual man should respond?

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  • Gil Bang changed the title to Matt Gaetz: come for underaged interns; stay for the crushed viagra and redbull


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