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Halloween bullshit


Prepuce of Doom

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3 hours ago, RamjetFDO said:

Fright, FDO?

Booster?  Go fright.

Retro?  Go fright.

Guidance?  Go fright.

Surgeon?  Go fright.

EECOM?  Go fright.

Happy Harroween Beijing Spacecom.  

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41 minutes ago, Doc Reeves said:

If I were a teen in that neighborhood, those skeletons would be posed banging each other immediately 

An easier target is just down the block. 

They have had a whole Titanic theme going all month, with the only constant being the looming iceberg with 2020 on it. 

 

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Yeah, but it's always served a purpose.  I get to make all kinds of promises to myself and my wife between Christmas and New Year's Eve.  And then on New Year's Day...can wake up, have a few bloody mary's, get lazy with football, and proclaim, "Tomorrow.  On the 2nd...shit's gonna be different!"  

It has lost its luster with the kids in school now, because now...real life in the next calendar year doesn't really start until like the 4th/5th/6th...which is quite fine by me.  

Now Arbor Day...obviously that's a scam run by the Jews and the Muslims! 

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shit can new years? what the hell is wrong with you? The stress of christmas and family drama is over. We are back home from the yearly 1,000 mile roadtrip to see mine and wife's families.

We have friends visit, most years its more than 20, many who we don't see but once a year. Women folk cook black eyed peas and tamales inside all day on new year's eve, I fire up the grill and cook fajitas. Everyone eats and drinks too much. I build a big ass fire in the fire pit in the back yard and light it after dark. Kids run wild. Dogs go crazy.

Some friends will crash at our place in the guest room, or on a sofa or even the floor, some share a short term rental a mile down the road, a couple or so who can deal with the cold will throw up a tent and camp, a precious few (less every year) just stay up all night sipping bourbon, smoking and reminiscing and bullshitting and bitching about getting old while tending the fire. 

Next day everyone eats again, nurses hangovers. The men watch football in one room, the women play board games in another, and the kids watch TV upstairs. During halftime or whenever we feel like it, we go outside and hit golf balls into the pasture.

 

 

 

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13 hours ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

shit can new years? what the hell is wrong with you? The stress of christmas and family drama is over. We are back home from the yearly 1,000 mile roadtrip to see mine and wife's families.

We have friends visit, most years its more than 20, many who we don't see but once a year. Women folk cook black eyed peas and tamales inside all day on new year's eve, I fire up the grill and cook fajitas. Everyone eats and drinks too much. I build a big ass fire in the fire pit in the back yard and light it after dark. Kids run wild. Dogs go crazy.

Some friends will crash at our place in the guest room, or on a sofa or even the floor, some share a short term rental a mile down the road, a couple or so who can deal with the cold will throw up a tent and camp, a precious few (less every year) just stay up all night sipping bourbon, smoking and reminiscing and bullshitting and bitching about getting old while tending the fire. 

Next day everyone eats again, nurses hangovers. The men watch football in one room, the women play board games in another, and the kids watch TV upstairs. During halftime or whenever we feel like it, we go outside and hit golf balls into the pasture.

 

 

 

Are you taking applications for new friends?

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22 minutes ago, Sandman said:

Is there gonna be a new thing where some of you poor bastards are going to pay money to be driven around your own neighborhoods, looking at halloween decorations? 

 

Let's get our boo on!

Hey kids!  Look over thurrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.....

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F that.  Keep Thanksgiving (football, turkey) and Christmas (A Christmas Story, joy of children).  Get rid of Valentine's and Easter.

Valentines Day is a sham. Good thing my wife agrees with me on this one so there are zero expectations for me to do anything.
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Is anyone trying to do a more "contactless" method of candy delivery, like a chute or something?  People around here are all freaked out about a bunch ofkids reaching into a common bowl.

I was thinking of maybe just throwing the candy at the kids.  Make a game out of it- 5 pts for a head shot, 2 pts for a torso shot, and 1 for a limb.  Maybe compete against some of my neighbors. 

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Wrist rocket. 

~~~~~

We're trying to figure all that out too, both from the homeowner standpoint, but also with a five-year old. 

I think we might just set up a card table in front yard with a bunch of candies on it and then periodically refresh the supply. Hopefully hanging out on the porch will dissuade the older kids from taking everything. 

As far as trick or treating goes, I don't know what we're going to do. Maybe just walk around the neighborhood and give him a shitload of candy when we get home. Nothing else really seems to make sense - don't really want to be going up to doors needlessly, and also don't think it makes any sense to collect candy at all. 

If you were to try to come up with a cultural tradition to most effectively spread a highly contagious illness, trick or treating would be a pretty solid concept to build around. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom
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4 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

I'm debating whether to stuff the cavities full of dirt just to make it even more fucked up looking, but it's only been outside for a day or two, and I want to see how the natural rot progresses. 

Username checks out

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Is anyone trying to do a more "contactless" method of candy delivery, like a chute or something?  People around here are all freaked out about a bunch ofkids reaching into a common bowl.
I was thinking of maybe just throwing the candy at the kids.  Make a game out of it- 5 pts for a head shot, 2 pts for a torso shot, and 1 for a limb.  Maybe compete against some of my neighbors. 



I saw this on an RV forum where people are decorating their campsites at RV resorts and passing out candy. I posted it on the RV thread but why not here too

1386694477_cousineddiecandydelivery.thumb.jpg.d187124e7a3c75458e8de0485653729f.jpg

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Is anyone trying to do a more "contactless" method of candy delivery, like a chute or something?  People around here are all freaked out about a bunch ofkids reaching into a common bowl.
I was thinking of maybe just throwing the candy at the kids.  Make a game out of it- 5 pts for a head shot, 2 pts for a torso shot, and 1 for a limb.  Maybe compete against some of my neighbors. 
You have bigger problems to worry about. Like Thanksgiving and the shortage of single serving dishes!
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58 minutes ago, davidg said:

 

 


I saw this on an RV forum where people are decorating their campsites at RV resorts and passing out candy. I posted it on the RV thread but why not here too

1386694477_cousineddiecandydelivery.thumb.jpg.d187124e7a3c75458e8de0485653729f.jpg
 

 

 

Candy shitter's full?  

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11 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

The hide of this terrible gourd was so tough and resilient that it broke the old-assed hammer I was hitting it with. 

Doomlet was delighted. 

 

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The Necronumpkin needs it's own thread.

Fucking thing looks like something Cthullu would create to slay humanity.

Edited by MissingInAction
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