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MaybeACoordinator has passed away - Official Farewell Thread


Brisketexan

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On 5/10/2023 at 11:10 PM, troph said:

His article about his mom got to me like really got to me. Maybe the trauma - not the same but a lot of us share a common experience when you talk about childhood trauma. Maybe it’s how close he was to my musical epicenter (I named my son after Guy Clark), maybe how he passed is too similar to a friend I lost that I still miss most days.  Seems like some of you might be having a hard time too. Not sure what to say.

So I made a playlist. It wasn’t planned, I was listening to Bonnie Raitt of all artists and one thing led to another. It’s for him but for you fellas too. it’s ok to be sad, some times our sadness is all we can really call our own. 

Sorry you’re gone MAC. I’m tired of loss, I bet you are too.  

 

 

 

The article really got to me too. Maybe it’s because I had a parent that was great but also a train wreck too. My dad was a great dad but there wasn’t anything he couldn’t fuck up when he put his mind to it and he always had to have a vice. I tell stories about my childhood and I will be laughing while telling a story and look over to the audience of the story and they are about to cry. In a lot of ways I wouldn’t trade my parents for anything but in other ways damn it would have been nice to have normal parents. Also, becoming a parent makes you never want to do that to your kids. 

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I have a friend I grew up with who is on this tragic path. Been about 15 years in the making. After her third child was born she just fucking lost it.

I saw her over Easter weekend for the first time in a year and she was shockingly thin and limping around on a foot she broke 6 months prior. Never went to a Dr because she couldn't stay sober for even a day. 

I'm told she's is out at her folks place in the country failing more and more every day. 

Of all the diseases addiction may be the most torture because there's always a little hope they can turn things around. The loss of that hope is almost as painful as the loss of the victim of the disease. 

Edited by MissingInAction
Sorry guys. MaC is still kicking it
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^
That last part...well said.

Any word/updates on how his family is doing?  Obviously printing out his posts over the years with a nice flower arrangement would be about the most fucked up thing we could do.  But we could at least tastefully sign the digital guestbook or something.  Send a donation in his name to something.  Well rounded cat like MAC had to have had some charitable engagements.  

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On 5/12/2023 at 7:08 PM, RDCanecutter said:

Just talked to MAC. He's got 99 problems but bein' dead ain't one.

Still obviously lots of health challenges, but he says he's seeing some slight improvement here and there.

We talked about BBQ, catfish, brunswick stew, burgoo, the Civil War, the Big Thicket, Tennessee's inherent recruiting problems in Knoxville ("hillbillies are mean, and annoying on the field, but ultimately of no consequence...) and a few other things. Also, his doctor said he could eat whatever he wanted so he sent out for a Whataburger double patty melt with jalapenos.

Still with us as of last Friday.

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On 5/9/2023 at 2:27 PM, MonkeyDoughnut said:

Gonna be missed around these parts.

Didn't know him but he was quite the story teller. As we near Mother's Day, a story he wrote a decade ago about his mother that gives you some great insight into his life:

https://www.houstoniamag.com/news-and-city-life/2013/07/of-unknown-origin-july-2013

 

That is a phenomenal read. Get well, MAC.

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2 hours ago, Al_4_ISU said:

I preface this with the statement that I’m a medical moron, but are liver transplants a thing?

They are. My wife worked a few years in the surgical and liver ICU at Houston Methodist, which I believe is one of the top places in the country/world for them. Unfortunately, she mostly had horror stories about the patients who rolled through those doors. It's an incredibly long and dangerous road for those lucky enough to receive one, but he seems to have surprised people since this most recent tragedy began, so maybe his fortune can continue.

**I don't recall if Methodist is where he is at, but that would be my guess

Edited by hookem2010
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I preface this with the statement that I’m a medical moron, but are liver transplants a thing?

They absolutely are, but I don't think he would be eligible. Without sounding like a prick, there is a pattern of recent behavior that would preclude him from being a candidate for such a procedure.
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13 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

An update just posted:

__________

Hi All - I've gotten word folks are worried and wanting an update. John is hanging tight, holding steady with 8-hours of dialysis each day. They had hoped to transfer him out of the ICU but his BP remains too low to risk it and for the lesser amount of dialysis required for that step down. His internal bleed, something we were terrified of, seems not to have returned. Keep in mind that none of this changes the fact that his liver is completely and permanently damaged.

He's in some pain as he has extremely limited mobility, but is keeping his good humor.

I will be visiting him tomorrow --have not seen John since last Friday b/c.... Covid. I and others impacted are much better and he is apparently asymptomatic.
_________

So, there you have it.

Hang in there Mac

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10 hours ago, Mullet Free said:

IIRC the rules were bent a bit when Mickey Mantle got his done at Baylor in Dallas. 

My grandpa grew up with Mickey in NE Oklahoma.  As a result of that I was around him a little bit in my younger days.  Never saw him sober, and that’s a little sad when you can tell that when you’re 8.

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8 hours ago, conVINCEd said:

My grandpa grew up with Mickey in NE Oklahoma.  As a result of that I was around him a little bit in my younger days.  Never saw him sober, and that’s a little sad when you can tell that when you’re 8.

Was that because you were around?  

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15 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Well…we’re in the endgame. From the Gofundme page maintained by his dad:

______________

Sepsis and another infection have appeared, John has been in intense pain, his kidneys have not regained function, there are no live liver cells, he has been exposed to Covid and his leg pain from his nueropathy is so bad he can hardly move his fingers and his legs feel, as he says, "like glass breaking constantly". The family has decided to, on the advice of all the attending doctors, to unplug the dialysis and blood pressure meds. He will be given more pain meds and be treated as if he was in a hospice care. Once at this point, he will drift off in a short period.
There will be more updates as plans are made for ways to celebrate the life of this most remarkable writer and person. All of us want to thank you for helping us with his care over the past 10 months and please know any remaining funds after funeral and other expenses are paid, will be passed to his children. I wish our ride tog ether had come to a better ending. It's so heartwarming for us all to know over 400 people contributed to this fund to help John Nova and we thank you for your positive thoughts on John's behalf.
-- John Lomax III on behalf of John Nova's family, friends and fans.
Si'm sorry but I'm starting to cry now.

——————

So….fuck.

Now we’re getting to the place where I get fucking pissed at him. Last conversation we had, I told him that he had to put the fucking bottle down. It was clear that he had no such intention.

I don’t understand addiction. I guess I’m blessed that I don’t. But I still get to be pissed off that it exists, and that it takes people from us. I’ve buried more people than I ever expected due to it….so, there we are.

Sorry to share this update. I really, really am.

Sad update.

 

How long ago did you talk to him about quitting? Was it already obviously killing him?

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Sad update.
 
How long ago did you talk to him about quitting? Was it already obviously killing him?

About 2.5 months ago (my last VM from him was on 2/26, called him back a day or so later). And make no mistake, he was in bad shape then (the acute medical crisis began last summer), but there was still some path to recovery. Not an easy or guaranteed one, but also not impossible. Unless he kept drinking. Which he did.
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Just now, Brisketexan said:


About 2.5 months ago (my last VM from him was on 2/26, called him back a day or so later). And make no mistake, he was in bad shape then, but there was still some path to recovery. Not an easy or guaranteed one, but also not impossible. Unless he kept drinking. Which he did.

Drinking yourself to death is such a sad way to go. You almost always get a warning. You show up one day with bleeding esophageal varices or they incidentally discover you’re developing cirrhosis when you have an unrelated surgery. I often wonder what happens to those people after we see them. Some people just can’t quit. 

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1 hour ago, Brisketexan said:

Well…we’re in the endgame. From the Gofundme page maintained by his dad:

______________

Sepsis and another infection have appeared, John has been in intense pain, his kidneys have not regained function, there are no live liver cells, he has been exposed to Covid and his leg pain from his nueropathy is so bad he can hardly move his fingers and his legs feel, as he says, "like glass breaking constantly". The family has decided to, on the advice of all the attending doctors, to unplug the dialysis and blood pressure meds. He will be given more pain meds and be treated as if he was in a hospice care. Once at this point, he will drift off in a short period.
There will be more updates as plans are made for ways to celebrate the life of this most remarkable writer and person. All of us want to thank you for helping us with his care over the past 10 months and please know any remaining funds after funeral and other expenses are paid, will be passed to his children. I wish our ride tog ether had come to a better ending. It's so heartwarming for us all to know over 400 people contributed to this fund to help John Nova and we thank you for your positive thoughts on John's behalf.
-- John Lomax III on behalf of John Nova's family, friends and fans.
Si'm sorry but I'm starting to cry now.

——————

So….fuck.

Now we’re getting to the place where I get fucking pissed at him. Last conversation we had, I told him that he had to put the fucking bottle down. It was clear that he had no such intention.

I don’t understand addiction. I guess I’m blessed that I don’t. But I still get to be pissed off that it exists, and that it takes people from us. I’ve buried more people than I ever expected due to it….so, there we are.

Sorry to share this update. I really, really am.

Here's to the sunny slopes of long ago.

 

Hook em MAC

Edited by Post Oak
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