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Bachelor/Bachelorette/Paradise Catch-All


C-Man

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Anybody watching this season? It started last week. A couple of detestable guys on this one already in Jordan, the male model, and Lincoln, the black Brit, who cried when one of the dudes threw a mocked-up wedding picture of him and Becca in the pool. So far, so good.

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Ha!  I wondered if anyone would start one of these.  I started the last one in shame, but I was drunk when I did it.   And yes, Jordan is hilariously unaware of how he sounds.  He actually seems to think people should be impressed that he's a male model.   He is proof that the producers get to save one person each week up until a certain point.  I was kind of half watching and playing on my phone, but when he talked to Becca, what was her reaction?  I didn't bother looking up from my phone, but when he was sitting there in his underwear, it sounded like she was just saying, "uh huh, yeah, that's great, ok, well it was nice talking to you".  

And be nice to Lincoln.  Or you'll make him cry.  He misses his momma and he probably will self evict in the next two weeks because he's home sick.  

Oh, and I'm drunk right now.  At least that's my excuse when this thread breaks down into a bunch of posters calling us pussies.  

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This year's crop of guys is boring and generic. It's hard to tell them apart. They should be wearing nametags.
Jordan is awesome. He's a great mixture of oblivious, pretension, self-awareness and ego.
 
 


He’s got “Blue Steel” down pretty good.
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that said, i'm totally in, obviously.  the first 3 weeks of the bachelor/bachelorette are my favorite, outside of bip.  because that's when all the drama is, big groups, tension, etc.  once it gets romantic and serious, i typically tune out.  the first 3-4 weeks are also where they figure out who should be on bip, which is all i'm about, really.

there needs to be a running list of jordan's made up words.  he tries to talk down to someone, which is very difficult when you're making up words and trying to sound smart.  he's already had one that i can't remember, and it's bugging me.  i think it was in ep1.  and now in the previews, he's like, "when people look at me, attached to me is professionality, and..."  while technically a word, he's clearly trying to say "a professionalism".  he's done something like that 2-3x already and it's fantastic.

also, becca says "i'm not gonna lie..." more than aaron sorkin says, "to say nothing of the fact that..."  it should be a drinking game.

oh, and the rumor is that colton only went on the show because he thought tia was going to be the bachelorette, which was already in motion, before arie went all arie. i'd still like more details on "i dated tia."  later he said they spent a weekend together.  if i say i dated someone, it implies at least 5 dates over the span of 6+ weeks at least.  otherwise i would say "i hooked up with" or "i went on a couple of dates with".  if he's trying to downplay it, he shouldn't have used the phrase "we dated" like it was a straight up relationship.

clearly they only kept him on because tia is on next week.

oh, and i made fun of lincoln for crying, which drew some ire from the wife.  i then had to explain guys to her.  everyone went through this.  when you're around 10-12 years old, everyone matures differently.  at some point, you're playing football or something in someone's yard, and one kid goes down hard and starts crying.  and everyone else is like "dude, he's crying" when in reality, most boys are mere months removed from being that sensitive about things.  when it happens in your 20's over something that "means a lot to me" like that photo you had for 5 minutes, something is wrong.

that's all for now...

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1 hour ago, henrygandorf said:

that said, i'm totally in, obviously.  the first 3 weeks of the bachelor/bachelorette are my favorite, outside of bip.  because that's when all the drama is, big groups, tension, etc.  once it gets romantic and serious, i typically tune out.  the first 3-4 weeks are also where they figure out who should be on bip, which is all i'm about, really.

there needs to be a running list of jordan's made up words.  he tries to talk down to someone, which is very difficult when you're making up words and trying to sound smart.  he's already had one that i can't remember, and it's bugging me.  i think it was in ep1.  and now in the previews, he's like, "when people look at me, attached to me is professionality, and..."  while technically a word, he's clearly trying to say "a professionalism".  he's done something like that 2-3x already and it's fantastic.

also, becca says "i'm not gonna lie..." more than aaron sorkin says, "to say nothing of the fact that..."  it should be a drinking game.

oh, and the rumor is that colton only went on the show because he thought tia was going to be the bachelorette, which was already in motion, before arie went all arie. i'd still like more details on "i dated tia."  later he said they spent a weekend together.  if i say i dated someone, it implies at least 5 dates over the span of 6+ weeks at least.  otherwise i would say "i hooked up with" or "i went on a couple of dates with".  if he's trying to downplay it, he shouldn't have used the phrase "we dated" like it was a straight up relationship.

clearly they only kept him on because tia is on next week.

oh, and i made fun of lincoln for crying, which drew some ire from the wife.  i then had to explain guys to her.  everyone went through this.  when you're around 10-12 years old, everyone matures differently.  at some point, you're playing football or something in someone's yard, and one kid goes down hard and starts crying.  and everyone else is like "dude, he's crying" when in reality, most boys are mere months removed from being that sensitive about things.  when it happens in your 20's over something that "means a lot to me" like that photo you had for 5 minutes, something is wrong.

that's all for now...

I haven't finished your post, but I want to get this out before I forget it.  Last night's word was some bastardization of "disingenuous".   And the guy he was calling invented another version of it I believe.  

I can't believe I spelled it correctly on my first try.  

 

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Did the guy who broke crybaby's picture get a rose?  He did a terrible job of explaining to her why he tossed the picture.  He didn't even mention how he was rubbing it in their faces.  He just made it sound like it was sitting there and he didn't want to look at it.  

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1 hour ago, henrygandorf said:

that said, i'm totally in, obviously.  the first 3 weeks of the bachelor/bachelorette are my favorite, outside of bip.  because that's when all the drama is, big groups, tension, etc.  once it gets romantic and serious, i typically tune out.  the first 3-4 weeks are also where they figure out who should be on bip, which is all i'm about, really.

there needs to be a running list of jordan's made up words.  he tries to talk down to someone, which is very difficult when you're making up words and trying to sound smart.  he's already had one that i can't remember, and it's bugging me.  i think it was in ep1.  and now in the previews, he's like, "when people look at me, attached to me is professionality, and..."  while technically a word, he's clearly trying to say "a professionalism".  he's done something like that 2-3x already and it's fantastic.

also, becca says "i'm not gonna lie..." more than aaron sorkin says, "to say nothing of the fact that..."  it should be a drinking game.

oh, and the rumor is that colton only went on the show because he thought tia was going to be the bachelorette, which was already in motion, before arie went all arie. i'd still like more details on "i dated tia."  later he said they spent a weekend together.  if i say i dated someone, it implies at least 5 dates over the span of 6+ weeks at least.  otherwise i would say "i hooked up with" or "i went on a couple of dates with".  if he's trying to downplay it, he shouldn't have used the phrase "we dated" like it was a straight up relationship.

clearly they only kept him on because tia is on next week.

oh, and i made fun of lincoln for crying, which drew some ire from the wife.  i then had to explain guys to her.  everyone went through this.  when you're around 10-12 years old, everyone matures differently.  at some point, you're playing football or something in someone's yard, and one kid goes down hard and starts crying.  and everyone else is like "dude, he's crying" when in reality, most boys are mere months removed from being that sensitive about things.  when it happens in your 20's over something that "means a lot to me" like that photo you had for 5 minutes, something is wrong.

that's all for now...

 

13 minutes ago, Go Pokes said:

I haven't finished your post, but I want to get this out before I forget it.  Last night's word was some bastardization of "disingenuous".   And the guy he was calling invented another version of it I believe.  

I can't believe I spelled it correctly on my first try.  

 

The word he's trying to use is ingenuity yet he insists on adding an additional syllable right in the middle. It's cringe-worthy and fucking hysterical at the same time!

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11 minutes ago, Go Pokes said:

Did the guy who broke crybaby's picture get a rose?  He did a terrible job of explaining to her why he tossed the picture.  He didn't even mention how he was rubbing it in their faces.  He just made it sound like it was sitting there and he didn't want to look at it.  

Yeah, I said the same thing to my wife. He did himself no favors with that explanation. BTW, he did get a rose.

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That fact that I'm not sure if you are right or I am right tells you how indecipherable his sentences are.  Your word means clever and my word means being a phony.  The words are not even close in meaning and I can't tell you which one he was trying to say.  

Edited by Go Pokes
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1 hour ago, henrygandorf said:

that said, i'm totally in, obviously.  the first 3 weeks of the bachelor/bachelorette are my favorite, outside of bip.  because that's when all the drama is, big groups, tension, etc.  once it gets romantic and serious, i typically tune out.  the first 3-4 weeks are also where they figure out who should be on bip, which is all i'm about, really.

there needs to be a running list of jordan's made up words.  he tries to talk down to someone, which is very difficult when you're making up words and trying to sound smart.  he's already had one that i can't remember, and it's bugging me.  i think it was in ep1.  and now in the previews, he's like, "when people look at me, attached to me is professionality, and..."  while technically a word, he's clearly trying to say "a professionalism".  he's done something like that 2-3x already and it's fantastic.

also, becca says "i'm not gonna lie..." more than aaron sorkin says, "to say nothing of the fact that..."  it should be a drinking game.

oh, and the rumor is that colton only went on the show because he thought tia was going to be the bachelorette, which was already in motion, before arie went all arie. i'd still like more details on "i dated tia."  later he said they spent a weekend together.  if i say i dated someone, it implies at least 5 dates over the span of 6+ weeks at least.  otherwise i would say "i hooked up with" or "i went on a couple of dates with".  if he's trying to downplay it, he shouldn't have used the phrase "we dated" like it was a straight up relationship.

clearly they only kept him on because tia is on next week.

oh, and i made fun of lincoln for crying, which drew some ire from the wife.  i then had to explain guys to her.  everyone went through this.  when you're around 10-12 years old, everyone matures differently.  at some point, you're playing football or something in someone's yard, and one kid goes down hard and starts crying.  and everyone else is like "dude, he's crying" when in reality, most boys are mere months removed from being that sensitive about things.  when it happens in your 20's over something that "means a lot to me" like that photo you had for 5 minutes, something is wrong.

that's all for now...

You got married?

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40 minutes ago, Go Pokes said:

That fact that I'm not sure if you are right or I am right tells you how indecipherable his sentences are.  Your word means clever and my word means being a phony.  The words are not even close in meaning and I can't tell you which one he was trying to say.  

Maybe he was trying to say "ingenuous" and instead used "ingenuity" and he actually butchered the pronunciation (maybe "ingeninuity" or something like that) of the second.

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the word he was trying to use stems from "disingenuous" - not ingenuity.  the fact that it's even a discussion is a problem.  maybe he was trying to say disingenuousness (which is a word, but spellcheck on here says otherwise).  he instead tried to make it a noun i think, like disingenuity or something, which sounds more like it stems from ingenious.  he's trying to work from genuine and took several wrong turns.

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4 hours ago, babysdaddy said:

watched Monday's episode last night.  Is the crying black dude faking his accent?  Also, ABC must be thrilled with the number to black dudes she's kept around.  usually it is cracker central by this point

I've never seen so many black dudes to start a season before. Maybe she checked that box on the questionnaire.

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and in week 1, like 7 out of the first 8 she gave roses to were black dudes.  the one that got left out was probably like wtf.

she must've also said "pro athlete" or something similar, because we've got more than our share of those, if you count harlem globetrotters.  which i do.

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Not that I paid attention when my wife had it on, but the first week dude is in a chicken outfit and Jordan is all "how disrespectful is that" and "those guys aren't wearing any socks, how crude?"  A week later, chicken suit guy is complaining about Jordan wearing nothing and Jordan is wearing nothing, not only just not socks to a cocktail party.

the jokes write themselves...

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Trumps-Kim Jong fucked me last night. Was watching on delay with Mrs. C-Man when they cut to George Snuffaluffagus to talk about the "historic" meeting between two of the worst haircuts in the history of mankind. I quickly tried to jump to the Guide and record the $1M Pyramid after Bachelorette to hoopefully pick up some of the back end, assuming that's what was going to happen. But I missed about 10-11 minutes on the back end and only caught Becca crying just before the last scene cut.

I caught up online and see only Clay left because of his broken wrist. He wasn't going to go much further anyway, I don't think. He's got kind of a baby voice -- reminds me a little of Damon Wayans' doing a character on In Living Color or something -- but was pretty bland as a character. The Jordan-David shit was worth the show alone last night. David is a fucking twerp and Jordan is absolutely priceless. He will be amazing on Paradise, I think. Hell, shoot David down there too if his face has healed.

And Dick Marx. Holy fucking shit -- that's a name I haven't heard in a long, long time. At least he cut his hair.

Finally, in poking around to see if I missed anything during the Trump-Kim Jong silliness, I stumbled across some spoiler type news. Read further at your own discretion (as I might be spoiling the final winner).

Spoiler

Ran across some talk that the guy from Reno, who got the first impression rose, has posted some pretty anti-LGBT, hard-right memes and jokes over the years in Instagram and other places. He has since deleted those social media accounts. Anyway, that's not the news -- the news is he might be your winner. I think that will continue a pretty telling run of those getting the first impression rose actually going on to be the chosen mate.

 

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2 hours ago, C-Man said:

 

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Ran across some talk that the guy from Reno, who got the first impression rose, has posted some pretty anti-LGBT, hard-right memes and jokes over the years in Instagram and other places. He has since deleted those social media accounts. Anyway, that's not the news -- the news is he might be your winner. I think that will continue a pretty telling run of those getting the first impression rose actually going on to be the chosen mate.

 

yeah, that's been the rumor for a couple of weeks.  apparently the story was that he didn't himself post anything, but he "liked" some pretty shitty stuff - whether it was racial, political, anti-lgbt, whatever, it was pretty bad.  the speculation that he would be the eventual winner was because he made some big official announcement/apology about it (which would be pointless if he didn't at least go far) and then the next day apparently becca made a similar apology for him.  that's all second hand from the wife and her little gossip crew, so who knows the details or the timing of it.

garrett (the reno guy), colton, and the rest of them all seem to have some warts.  not many guys to root for right now, but of course becca continues with the "i had no idea it would be this hard" mantra that every single contestant says a few weeks in. 

i still need a lot of clarification on the colton-tia situation.  i have a feeling there are four sides to this story.  each of them has one, then there's the two stories they tell becca.  tia claims they didn't do more than kiss.  bullshit.  colton said "we dated" but then reduced it to "a weekend".  in either case, more than kissing was done, otherwise it would be a non-issue.  they did play up the "he came on the show because he thought tia would be the bachelorette" angle.  still not really buying it.  it's not easy to just come on the show if you want to, and there certainly should be easier ways to get a girl, especially if you've already spent time with her.

david falling off the top bunk and looking like a bear attack victim is...weird.  obviously he fell straight onto his face?  and he looks disfigured next week?  i guess i'll tune in for that.  david and jordan getting into it while everyone else tried to keep it together was reminiscent of griffey jr having to shield his laughing when pinella went all bonkers.  my wife didn't properly appreciate that comparison, but it was spot on.  that black guy could not hold it together.  sidenote, we toured that venue for our wedding, but it was too small.

neither one of those dudes is going to get very far.  when there's a 1 on 1 brawl happening, both get stained and both go away.  props to becca for calling jordan out on his tinder comments.  it was almost like jordan wanted to say "4000 women swiped right on me, but i don't pay attention to it, because i'm rarely on there."  instead, he said "i have 4000 matches" which means, obviously, that he swiped right on (at least) 4000 chicks.  duh.  i've never been on tinder, but it's my understanding that's how a match is made.  for a male model, man that guy needs validation 24 hours a day from every direction.

not sure which part you missed, c-man, but after the bickering session, it was all pretty meh, like much of this season (minus jordan).  clay injured himself doing what he does for a living, although he definitely went beast-mode at the end to tie up the game.  he gets a rose, then gives it back to do what's best for himself/his family.  hard to blame him, as he said he needs surgery and he was 100% not going to win.

the show essentially ended on clay giving back the rose, which means they'll have to do the ceremony next week, which is annoying.  keep a fucking structure.  i didn't need to see 35 minutes of the marx date (we fast forwarded much of it anyway).  judging from the clips, it really doesn't look like jordan stays very long.  but judging from the pattern they've established the last 5-6 shows, they'll put the two of them on a two on one date and leave jordan on some island/jungle/iceberg, or whatever.  someone needs to tell jordan that becca has made out with almost everyone on the show except him.  he'd cry like lincoln.

this season has been pretty blah, as i think becca is blah.  she has one story line, and they've beaten us over the head with it.  good dudes for bip is all i care about, and i think we got that. 

 

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4 minutes ago, henrygandorf said:

 

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yeah, that's been the rumor for a couple of weeks.  apparently the story was that he didn't himself post anything, but he "liked" some pretty shitty stuff - whether it was racial, political, anti-lgbt, whatever, it was pretty bad.  the speculation that he would be the eventual winner was because he made some big official announcement/apology about it (which would be pointless if he didn't at least go far) and then the next day apparently becca made a similar apology for him.  that's all second hand from the wife and her little gossip crew, so who knows the details or the timing of it.

 

garrett (the reno guy), colton, and the rest of them all seem to have some warts.  not many guys to root for right now, but of course becca continues with the "i had no idea it would be this hard" mantra that every single contestant says a few weeks in. 

i still need a lot of clarification on the colton-tia situation.  i have a feeling there are four sides to this story.  each of them has one, then there's the two stories they tell becca.  tia claims they didn't do more than kiss.  bullshit.  colton said "we dated" but then reduced it to "a weekend".  in either case, more than kissing was done, otherwise it would be a non-issue.  they did play up the "he came on the show because he thought tia would be the bachelorette" angle.  still not really buying it.  it's not easy to just come on the show if you want to, and there certainly should be easier ways to get a girl, especially if you've already spent time with her.

david falling off the top bunk and looking like a bear attack victim is...weird.  obviously he fell straight onto his face?  and he looks disfigured next week?  i guess i'll tune in for that.  david and jordan getting into it while everyone else tried to keep it together was reminiscent of griffey jr having to shield his laughing when pinella went all bonkers.  my wife didn't properly appreciate that comparison, but it was spot on.  that black guy could not hold it together.  sidenote, we toured that venue for our wedding, but it was too small.

neither one of those dudes is going to get very far.  when there's a 1 on 1 brawl happening, both get stained and both go away.  props to becca for calling jordan out on his tinder comments.  it was almost like jordan wanted to say "4000 women swiped right on me, but i don't pay attention to it, because i'm rarely on there."  instead, he said "i have 4000 matches" which means, obviously, that he swiped right on (at least) 4000 chicks.  duh.  i've never been on tinder, but it's my understanding that's how a match is made.  for a male model, man that guy needs validation 24 hours a day from every direction.

not sure which part you missed, c-man, but after the bickering session, it was all pretty meh, like much of this season (minus jordan).  clay injured himself doing what he does for a living, although he definitely went beast-mode at the end to tie up the game.  he gets a rose, then gives it back to do what's best for himself/his family.  hard to blame him, as he said he needs surgery and he was 100% not going to win.

the show essentially ended on clay giving back the rose, which means they'll have to do the ceremony next week, which is annoying.  keep a fucking structure.  i didn't need to see 35 minutes of the marx date (we fast forwarded much of it anyway).  judging from the clips, it really doesn't look like jordan stays very long.  but judging from the pattern they've established the last 5-6 shows, they'll put the two of them on a two on one date and leave jordan on some island/jungle/iceberg, or whatever.  someone needs to tell jordan that becca has made out with almost everyone on the show except him.  he'd cry like lincoln.

this season has been pretty blah, as i think becca is blah.  she has one story line, and they've beaten us over the head with it.  good dudes for bip is all i care about, and i think we got that. 

 

Hasn't it been intimated that Colton is a virgin? I think he also dated Ally Raisman at some point.

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Yeah, about three weeks ago, the preview included a clip of Colton saying something like, “I don’t know how I’m going to tell her I’m a virgin.” I have no idea how someone could date Raisman, and get a closeup look at that tush, and resist. Unless it was for publicity.

Harbor (who actually had a real NFL career) seems like a nice guy, and could perhaps be the male to breakthru as a Bachelor of color. But as C-Man noted, he’s got that weird less-than-manly voice, and pleasant blandness doesn’t make for a good rogue, sifting thru 25 women. 

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Saw that the other day.

Man, the perfume guy self-immolated like one I haven’t seen in a long, long time. Jordan lives another week. Surely, this was manipulated by producers to go on the 2-on-1 with the Denver VC tool, who fell out of the bunk bed.

On another note, wife recorded The Proposal after and this is easily the stupidest piece of shit show I’ve ever watched. Just awful.
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3 hours ago, C-Man said:

On another note, wife recorded The Proposal after and this is easily the stupidest piece of shit show I’ve ever watched. Just awful.

It was essentially Who Wants to Marry a MultiMillionaire without the pretense of there being a faux rich guy.

I’m cynical, so i suspect it’s a House Hunters type deal. Just as those assholes on that show already own the property they choose, I’m thinking these couples are already together. Tonight’s was too good to be true, right down to the matching car wrecks. Since there’s no prize won, I’ll bet it circumvents game show rules. 

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It was essentially Who Wants to Marry a MultiMillionaire without the pretense of there being a faux rich guy.
I’m cynical, so i suspect it’s a House Hunters type deal. Just as those assholes on that show already own the property they choose, I’m thinking these couples are already together. Tonight’s was too good to be true, right down to the matching car wrecks. Since there’s no prize won, I’ll bet it circumvents game show rules. 


I’ve only just gotten into House Hunters. Your post made me Google whether it was real or not. Guess I shouldn’t be surprised at what I found. Still doesn’t change the fact that Proposal was dogshit. Chicks were spare to fair.
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4 minutes ago, C-Man said:

 


I’ve only just gotten into House Hunters. Your post made me Google whether it was real or not. Guess I shouldn’t be surprised at what I found. Still doesn’t change the fact that Proposal was dogshit. Chicks were spare to fair.

 

 

The old and new Love Connection are the closet thing to a "real" dating show on TV. The Bachelor is all about making a name to get Instagram followers so you can push shitty products to your idiot "fans". 

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a buddy and his wife were on house hunter renovation, and they had already bought their house, knowing they would go on the show to get their kitchen redone.  the first part of the show was them looking at 3 houses.  one was there's already, and another was owned by some producer on the show.  only one was actually available to purchase.

 

as for last night, yeah, this show is getting pretty boring.  becca, as always, is not very interesting, and everything boils down to arie, so everyone feels sorry for her.  they bring him up a lot.  it's exhausting.

maybe i wasn't paying attention, but i think the jean-blanc thing was kind of a mixup.  here's how i saw it - he felt like he needed to get aggressive in his pursuit, so he kinda tricked her with the "i'm gonna tell you a secret but actually kiss you" move.  kinda creepy, but whatever.  she didn't seem to really like it, and the energy was weird.  then they showed him, and he was like "i don't feel right about this, i need to tell her how i feel."  then he goes over there, and tells her he thinks he's falling in love with her.

here's where i differ with what the general opinion was on the show.  i don't think he's in love with her, but i don't necessarily think he lied.  i think he got into his own head and convinced himself he was starting to have strong feelings for her.  so he said what he said, and she reacted like most people would.  then, when he tried to explain it, he said, "i was just telling you what i thought you wanted to hear" and everything went fucking bonkers.  what i think he meant to say was, "i really feel this way, and i thought you were ready to hear how i felt (even if his own feelings were accelerated and manufactured)."  of course the way it came out sounded like he outright lied, but the way he said it and was acting, i really think i'm onto something.

here's another thing that sucked.  he said he was falling in love with her, and then she said she's not there, and at that point, she was done with him, and he was already on his way off the show.  it was then when he said what he said.  after he left, becca implied to the group that "jean lied to me, so i told him to go home."  that's not how shit went down, as he was already gonna be bounced, and obviously slipped up with his words on his way out.

i don't really care one way or another, but becca came off looking like a huge drama queen and definitely thinks she's the only girl in history to ever be lied to, or be "blindsided".  every female contestant in bachelor history has had a guy in their past say they love them when they don't necessarily do.  she wallowed in that shit way too hard, and is making herself be more and more unlikable.  the way she talked about the night before you would've thought a nuclear bomb detonated in the house.  give me a fucking break.  even the wife was like, "she's drunk, and she's being a drama queen."

also, she seems to have no interest in jordan whatsoever.  she hasn't kissed him (she's kissed everyone), and it's not like she was able to go shopping.  i guarant-fucking-tee you that some producer gave her the underwear to give to him to form a connection knowing that a couple episodes later, there would be the inevitable 2-1 date with david.  we've talked about it on this thread (on shaggy) but this is now like 6-7 shows in a row they've done this exact move.  it's gotta be written on the wipe boards in the writer's room.  play up rivalry, bring to desolate spot for 2-1, dispose of the villain, leave him on island/iceberg/jungle.

happened with chad, happened with the blonde austin girl (against the twin maybe), happens every fucking show (someone else can probably remember more examples).  the problem is that the person who wins these fights never ever wins the show.  david will be gone in a couple weeks as well.

also jordan had another great quote last night, but not quite a made up word.  does anyone remember it?  it's gonna drive me crazy. 

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The producers definitely get one save per episode.  There's just no explaining how some of these contestants survive more than one week.  This season it's Jordan.  She has zero interest in him.  When he tried to kiss her in the golden undies, her response was telling.  Well, unless you have very little intellectuality and you suck at comprehensation.   And he thinks he's winning this thing.  Maybe not after last night.  For some reason, he thinks the order she gives out the roses is some kind of ranking system.  Of course, in his case it's actually true, but that's not how it usually goes.   I imagine the producers get to pick the order she gives out roses as well.  

The Proposal was so fucking stupid even my wife is not interested in watching the next one.  Assuming there is another one.  

 

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1 hour ago, henrygandorf said:

a buddy and his wife were on house hunter renovation, and they had already bought their house, knowing they would go on the show to get their kitchen redone.  the first part of the show was them looking at 3 houses.  one was there's already, and another was owned by some producer on the show.  only one was actually available to purchase.

 

as for last night, yeah, this show is getting pretty boring.  becca, as always, is not very interesting, and everything boils down to arie, so everyone feels sorry for her.  they bring him up a lot.  it's exhausting.

maybe i wasn't paying attention, but i think the jean-blanc thing was kind of a mixup.  here's how i saw it - he felt like he needed to get aggressive in his pursuit, so he kinda tricked her with the "i'm gonna tell you a secret but actually kiss you" move.  kinda creepy, but whatever.  she didn't seem to really like it, and the energy was weird.  then they showed him, and he was like "i don't feel right about this, i need to tell her how i feel."  then he goes over there, and tells her he thinks he's falling in love with her.

here's where i differ with what the general opinion was on the show.  i don't think he's in love with her, but i don't necessarily think he lied.  i think he got into his own head and convinced himself he was starting to have strong feelings for her.  so he said what he said, and she reacted like most people would.  then, when he tried to explain it, he said, "i was just telling you what i thought you wanted to hear" and everything went fucking bonkers.  what i think he meant to say was, "i really feel this way, and i thought you were ready to hear how i felt (even if his own feelings were accelerated and manufactured)."  of course the way it came out sounded like he outright lied, but the way he said it and was acting, i really think i'm onto something.

here's another thing that sucked.  he said he was falling in love with her, and then she said she's not there, and at that point, she was done with him, and he was already on his way off the show.  it was then when he said what he said.  after he left, becca implied to the group that "jean lied to me, so i told him to go home."  that's not how shit went down, as he was already gonna be bounced, and obviously slipped up with his words on his way out.

i don't really care one way or another, but becca came off looking like a huge drama queen and definitely thinks she's the only girl in history to ever be lied to, or be "blindsided".  every female contestant in bachelor history has had a guy in their past say they love them when they don't necessarily do.  she wallowed in that shit way too hard, and is making herself be more and more unlikable.  the way she talked about the night before you would've thought a nuclear bomb detonated in the house.  give me a fucking break.  even the wife was like, "she's drunk, and she's being a drama queen."

also, she seems to have no interest in jordan whatsoever.  she hasn't kissed him (she's kissed everyone), and it's not like she was able to go shopping.  i guarant-fucking-tee you that some producer gave her the underwear to give to him to form a connection knowing that a couple episodes later, there would be the inevitable 2-1 date with david.  we've talked about it on this thread (on shaggy) but this is now like 6-7 shows in a row they've done this exact move.  it's gotta be written on the wipe boards in the writer's room.  play up rivalry, bring to desolate spot for 2-1, dispose of the villain, leave him on island/iceberg/jungle.

happened with chad, happened with the blonde austin girl (against the twin maybe), happens every fucking show (someone else can probably remember more examples).  the problem is that the person who wins these fights never ever wins the show.  david will be gone in a couple weeks as well.

also jordan had another great quote last night, but not quite a made up word.  does anyone remember it?  it's gonna drive me crazy. 

I think Jean decided it was time to make his move because he felt he was falling behind the rest of the crew. He took his shot, overstated his feelings thinking that's what she'd want to hear and she wasn't interested. She did, of course, oversell what happened in the end.

There were a couple "Jordan" moments last night. The one I remember right from the end was in his private interview where he said something like, "I'm going to go from Captain Underpants to Captain I'm Gonna Steal (or Wind Up With) Your Girl" -- it was bad enough and he knew he had nothing there and trailed off accordingly.

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1 hour ago, henrygandorf said:

also, she seems to have no interest in jordan whatsoever.  she hasn't kissed him (she's kissed everyone), and it's not like she was able to go shopping.  i guarant-fucking-tee you that some producer gave her the underwear to give to him to form a connection knowing that a couple episodes later, there would be the inevitable 2-1 date with david.  we've talked about it on this thread (on shaggy) but this is now like 6-7 shows in a row they've done this exact move.  it's gotta be written on the wipe boards in the writer's room.  play up rivalry, bring to desolate spot for 2-1, dispose of the villain, leave him on island/iceberg/jungle.

happened with chad, happened with the blonde austin girl (against the twin maybe), happens every fucking show (someone else can probably remember more examples).  the problem is that the person who wins these fights never ever wins the show.  david will be gone in a couple weeks as well.

also jordan had another great quote last night, but not quite a made up word.  does anyone remember it?  it's gonna drive me crazy. 

Pretty sure it happened with Corinne and Taylor, also with the black guy and racist Lee on Rachel's season.

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I don't think there is a set rule on if producers get to keep people around but they sure as hell influence the lead to do "what is best for the show". Former contestants have even said so much. In many case they only see a real shot for a relationship with maybe 3-4 people and allow the producers to keep around whoever they want. Each person has their own producer who's sole job is to become best friends with those on the show and use that to mind fuck the ever loving shit out of them to get them to do what the producers want.

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3 minutes ago, JimmyHoffa said:

I don't think there is a set rule on if producers get to keep people around but they sure as hell influence the lead to do "what is best for the show". Former contestants have even said so much. In many case they only see a real shot for a relationship with maybe 3-4 people and allow the producers to keep around whoever they want. Each person has their own producer who's sole job is to become best friends with those on the show and use that to mind fuck the ever loving shit out of them to get them to do what the producers want.

someone in our watching group is pals with a producer (she's no longer on the show), but she basically said the contestant chooses most of the people they want to stay, and they allow 1-2 per week to maintain some story arcs they have set up.  but the producers have just about 100% say in which order the roses are given out.

if you've seen the show enough, you can generally tell who's staying or going based on screentime.  did harlem globetrotter guy appear in one interview?  they do those for everyone.  if you don't see anyone ever talk, they're not going very far, and likely aren't involved in the main storylines.  whose interviews got shown last night?  jean (obvious) and jordan (leading up to showdown).

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My favorite is watching the lead answer the questions after the show starts airing:

"why did you keep the clear psycho person on the show?"

 

Lead: They didn't act that way on our time alone that you didn't see

Lead: I thought that they could change

Lead: I was giving them a chance

Just once I would love for  them to say "my producer wanted to keep that shit show on as long as they could for ratings."

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13 minutes ago, henrygandorf said:

someone in our watching group is pals with a producer (she's no longer on the show), but she basically said the contestant chooses most of the people they want to stay, and they allow 1-2 per week to maintain some story arcs they have set up.  but the producers have just about 100% say in which order the roses are given out.

if you've seen the show enough, you can generally tell who's staying or going based on screentime.  did harlem globetrotter guy appear in one interview?  they do those for everyone.  if you don't see anyone ever talk, they're not going very far, and likely aren't involved in the main storylines.  whose interviews got shown last night?  jean (obvious) and jordan (leading up to showdown).

The Globetrotter guy had an interview here and there. There was one guy that got run in the second rose ceremony last night that I had no friggin' idea who he even was.

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hahhahahhahahhahahahahahh i forgot about that.

he didn't even say he thinks the world is flat, but he is certainly "skeptical" that it's round, because of how it looks from an airplane window.  he said he wants a rocket scientist or someone to call him and explain it or something like that.  amazing.

oh, and i did a quick google search and found this that i wrote on march 9th on shaggy:

something that's already getting old - i think it's happened in 3 straight shows pr maybe 3/4 (both men and women) - is the treatment of the "villain". whomever it turns out to be, always lasts 1-2 shows more than you think they should. they last just long enough to get past the group dates and finally to the first 2-1 date. then they'll pit the villain against someone who isn't a real threat to win it all, but typically a fan favorite type. then the villain is dumped in a pretty horrible way.

olivia was left on some $#@!ty island in favor of one of the twins. krystal was left sitting at dinner back when nobody thought kendall was a serious contender. chad was left in the woods when jojo left with the short military dude. not sure if rachel had a villain, but i'm assuming whomever it was got the boot on the first 2-1. after krystal started being horrible, i called it out, and two weeks later, like clockwork.

krystal was definitely the one from last season.

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2 minutes ago, Go Pokes said:

I believe Ashley I and the girl from Austin with the dead husband were matched up on one too.  

That pre-dated my involvement with the Bachelor universe. My first dip into the pool was the second season (I think) of BIP.

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42 minutes ago, C-Man said:

The Globetrotter guy had an interview here and there. There was one guy that got run in the second rose ceremony last night that I had no friggin' idea who he even was.

Was that the guy with the weird blond/gray hair?   Who the hell was he?  I swear he snuck in to the house after two or three episodes.  

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Just now, C-Man said:

That pre-dated my involvement with the Bachelor universe. My first dip into the pool was the second season (I think) of BIP.

This was fairly recent.  Ashley I is the one who is in love with Jared and cries almost constantly.  

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2 minutes ago, Go Pokes said:

This was fairly recent.  Ashley I is the one who is in love with Jared and cries almost constantly.  

Ashley I was the "star" the first year I watched BIP so I assumed any 2-on-1 involving her came on a previous regular installment of Bachelor before I was watching.

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it was olivia (i mentioned her in my cut and paste) - she was the chick from austin who was obnoxious and thought she was the front runner from the second the show started.  i'm pretty sure that was ben's season.  that was around the beginning of me paying any type of attention.

point is, it happens every season.  it's always the first 2-1.  

ok, i just googled olivia to make sure, because the name didn't sound right.  then i found this from an article from january:

Quote
 

All the people wanting Krystal to go home...she ain’t going anywhere until she’s on the 2-on-1. #TheBachelor

Edited by henrygandorf
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not sure why that paste screwed up my whole post, but the secret is out, as olivia has learned.

also, this hasn't been mentioned, but apparently becca (the young one) posted a photo on twitter of tia on colton's lap, like, real recently.  guess that secret's out as well.  looks like becca is rolling into vegas with about 12 guys, including a sex offender, tia's boyfriend, and a jordan.

i would love to see her just pick that black dude from the last date last night, but i'll bet anyone anything it won't happen.

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