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Tiny-dicked Dumbfuck with Guns Meta-Mega Thread


Beau Vine

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Wait, he shot at the shadows themselves?  I don't get that middle part of the report.  So are we now shooting at literal boogeymen or figurative boogeymen?  Because I mean like, it's a shadow which is not a real person but it is cast by a real person.  So where we at with our resident ballistics experts?  I mean if it's a shadow that rises up off your lawn and takes vertical shape and comes to get you, then yeah---open fire 'cause freedoms and witchcraft.  But if you shoot at a shadow and it falls, how do you know?  'Cause isn't it already lying flat and relatively motionless on your grass? 

This is gonna be a really fun delve into mental gymnastics for Muh Freedoms Crowd.  Y'all have at it, should be fucking outstanding even for our resident dipshits.  

Two fun facts---David Doyle owes money to some loan sharks who work the Starks Silver Dollar Casino in his town.  Later tonight, they will be informed that he is going to attempt to expose their operation in order to reduce his charges down the road and preserve his freedoms as a law abiding, responsible gun owner.  The evidence won't be enough to change things one way or the other.  But the very appearance and sound of panic from David means that while this investigation shakes out, Mr. Doyle is going to be the toast of the Castle Doctrine Law crowd.  Rather, he will meet an altogether different fate.  We keep forgetting that people this mentally unhinged that hide behind the mass crowd veil of "just exercising muh rights to defend myself" usually have other parallel issues-drug addiction, gambling problems, black market purchases, etc.  I keep forgetting we don't have to wait for law enforcement and the judicial process.  Let organized crime and cartels start taking our trash out for us.  

  

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1 hour ago, InkaUtexas said:

So fucking tired of this bullshit. Yeah, I own. I know how to use them, and never carry. All are locked up and I guard my house with two dogs and baseball bats. 

Neighbor came over a few days ago. Single teacher who lives behind me. She was nervous. A truck showed up to deliver a refrigerator she never ordered. Dudes did not speak English. So she just walked over here, asked me to go and talk to them. No fucking reason to get my pistol. She also has a pistol and kept her wits about her. It is not that fucking hard. But no. Instead BLAM BLAM BLAM. 

Just fucking talk to people. Turns out the dudes were lost. Nice dudes from Guatemala and were given a bad address. Figured it out with them and got them on their merry way. 

Fucking pisses me off. 

Thought it was going to end with you and the Guatemalans gangbanging the nervous single teacher. You don’t sound fun.

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8 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

Just a matter of time until deacon Johnny sack shows up on KPRC for shooting a jogger who had the audacity of not being white.

Don’t look at Next Door.  The only reason I still get alert emails is the comic factor but occasionally there’s the “I’m worried about someone walking through the neighborhood and I’m going to great lengths to describe their appearance without mentioning skin color until the actual black/brown person, who lives there, responds that they were exercising.”

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1 hour ago, 956 Worldwide said:

Two guys fishing? That’s a blasting. 
 

 

Those dudes were WAY too cool about that.  Fine if you want act cool to diffuse the situation while a guy is pointing a gun at you after firing at you, but if those dudes didn’t call the cops on that piece of shit they are doing society a great disservice.

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11 minutes ago, Snake Diggity said:

Those dudes were WAY too cool about that.  Fine if you want act cool to diffuse the situation while a guy is pointing a gun at you after firing at you, but if those dudes didn’t call the cops on that piece of shit they are doing society a great disservice.

Honestly, given the accents and the atmosphere, I’d sooner expect them to get arrested before the homeowner who shot at them, if this is “Anytown, American South.”

I just don’t get it. “Stuff has gone missing around here. What’s that I see? Two people holding fishing rods, in the process of casting, in the broad daylight? Better shoot first just to be sure.” 
 

 

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48 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

Honestly, given the accents and the atmosphere, I’d sooner expect them to get arrested before the homeowner who shot at them, if this is “Anytown, American South.”

I just don’t get it. “Stuff has gone missing around here. What’s that I see? Two people holding fishing rods, in the process of casting, in the broad daylight? Better shoot first just to be sure.” 

Well if we know there is a record amount of firepower in circulation/owned in this country.  And if we know that more and more states, in an effort to out-do one another, are making it easier to carry/CHL/open carry/etc.  Than there's a reasonable assumption that the person at your door/driveway/pond/store is there to shoot you, so you must open fire first.  And claim self defense/castle doctrine/property crime/freedums. 

This cycle is getting warmed up.  Between this first shooter mentality and mass shootings (the suicide number will stay relatively static), gun deaths are going to continue to trend upward and stories like this will go from anecdotal to statistically relevant.  But yes, yes, what about Chicago?  

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Someone needs to start doing a daily tally of shooting deaths, broken down by category. Hell, even just “AR-15” deaths. 
 

May 6- Murder Victims 

Mall shopper, 37

Mall shopper, 35

Child, 3

Security Guard, 20

Fourth grader

Second grader

Engineer, 20 

Mall shopper, 32

Jackbooted UN, Federal, or Foreign Troops 

0 (This category has not been updated since September 3, 1783

Criminals Successfully Shot 

 

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Yeah, "Good Guy with Gun" in the last 60 years in Texas is 1W-37L, IIRC.  That may need to be updated given the last few weeks in Texas.  

I mean, I think stairs and heat exhaustion have a better record against shooters in Texas.  Must be because our gun laws are too restrictive.  

Oh wait, I bet it has something more to do with embraced stupidity. 

Don't get me wrong, we can still go on a run and get a wild card berth and make the playoffs.  Lord knows we'll have plenty of chances.

As an owner that doesn't carry, I always found it curious that the bill establishing that cell alert deal for phones that would tell if there was an active shooter within XYZmiles of you was so adamantly voted down by one particular party.  If I were an adamant carry guy like some of you, I would have demanded my Rep/Senator vote that thing to the heavens.  You'd know precisely where an active shooter was, you could pack up and go heavy.  You could be the hero.  We literally gamed out a real life video game.  Mass shooter starts, somebody reports it, alert goes out, nearest 20 good guys with guns show up and take him out.  I swear you guys could fuck up a cup of coffee.   

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4 hours ago, 956 Worldwide said:

This tiny ducked lunatic apparently read news reports about people getting shot for no reason and said “fuck yeah.” He went on his FB business page to brag about almost shooting a six year old looking for her cat.
 

https://www.npr.org/2023/05/03/1173377876/meteorologist-iweathernet-chris-robbins-doorbell-gun

image.thumb.jpeg.9dd11d56748d09124b38c865ff6113de.jpeg

 

has Chris been doxxed yet?

Seems like a perfect reason to get red flagged.

 

 

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I like the "that's a blasting" tagline for this bullshit. I truly hate where this country had landed on a lot of issues and where we're headed, guns being high on the list. Just yesterday I was doing some work for my neighborhood association to determine if we could use our 501(c)(3) status to obtain a sales tax exemption for materials to improve the neighborhood. I found that Oklahoma statute lists 40+ types of 501(c)(3)'s that can get the exemption and neighborhood associations aren't on the list. Fine I guess, most of the list is big picture stuff for other charitable purposes, but then saw that NRA/2A lobbying "charities" do qualify. So buying materials for a Gravy Seals rally is exempt, but trashbags and water bottles for volunteers to clean up the access road that cuts through the neighborhood isn't as important. Fuck this state, and this country in general.

Edited by 'stache
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back to the OP

https://www.sunherald.com/news/nation-world/national/article275197271.html

Doyle said when he went back outside, he saw several people running from his property and opened fire.

He shot at people running away. What a fucking piece of shit coward. How the fuck did he survive 58 years being such a fucking pussy.

 

America! Home of the brave cowards!

 

 

Edited by crash_davis
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I said that to a gravy seal outside the Texas Capitol a couple years ago who was open carrying as I was walking into a meeting.  He was so pissed off, you could literally see him turning red.  He opened his mouth and I said "don't bother" as I walked past the metal detectors.  

Admittedly, I would not have said that to him anywhere else but for a place with well-trained DPS troopers who know me (and yeah, I left through another exit).  But it felt fun as fuck at the time.  

It bothered my dad, as a Navy comms NCO veteran, that more people didn't know what RADAR stood for, but it never occurred him to open fire about it.  

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8 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

I said that to a gravy seal outside the Texas Capitol a couple years ago who was open carrying as I was walking into a meeting.  He was so pissed off, you could literally see him turning red.  He opened his mouth and I said "don't bother" as I walked past the metal detectors.  

Admittedly, I would not have said that to him anywhere else but for a place with well-trained DPS troopers who know me (and yeah, I left through another exit).  But it felt fun as fuck at the time.  

It bothered my dad, as a Navy comms NCO veteran, that more people didn't know what RADAR stood for, but it never occurred him to open fire about it.  

“There’s no reason that your assault rifle needs a high-capacity clip.” 

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Wasn't that an SNL sketch like 45 years ago?  

(DING DONG)  "Delivery for you Sir."

"Nah, I'm not falling for this again, you're that landshark here to shoot me!"

"Candygram"

"I'm not opening that door, you're gonna hurt me!"

"Pizza delivery"

BANG BANG.

Jesus, what are the fucking conversations right now at DoorDash, Amazon, Favor, et. al.?  They usually don't ring the doorbell, just drop the shit at your doorstep and you get a text that it's there.  But even just approaching the door seems to be an issue now and door delivery is only to get more ubiquitous as is paranoid hatred and gun ownership.  

I know so many gun owners, but it took that crazy Brisket to enlighten me on how many people just sit inside with their gun loaded.  I figured a few crazies would do that, but not millions of Americans.  If you dropped my food order right now, rang the doorbell to let me know it was there, and walked back to your car.  You'd be on MoPac before I went to where we store the gun, did the bio test, loaded it, walked all the way to the front door (I don't live in a trailer), chambered, looked outside, and then opened fire.  
 

If you know any of the CTO's at these delivery companies, please tell them to focus on nothing for the next few weeks but adding a feature that says, "Your delivery will be arriving in 5mts.  Here is a photo of the driver (like Uber), please do not shoot!"  Of course that probably just gives extra time to load the weapon to some sick fucks so can you do?  

This whole thing has gone from the ridiculous to the sublime in the last few months.  Let's go ahead and game out where it goes from there 'cause we're gonna be on the underside of it no matter what crazy shit we come up with

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I anxiously await the tragic news story which may come from this.

 

https://cbsaustin.com/news/local/woman-steals-machine-gun-from-converse-shooting-range-alert-says-bexar-county-texas-sheriff-deputies-report-firearms-evidence-photos

According to an alert the store owner sent out on Monday, the woman came in and rented a handgun to use on the firing range. A few minutes later, she rented a Heckler Koch Fully Automatic 9mm MP5, submachine gun, but instead of going out to the shooting range, she walked out of the store, hopped into a white Ford Ranger and drove off.

The Texas driver's license given to rent the firearms was what store officials said in an alert "from someone who was killed in a car fire in December 2022." They said the woman looked similar to the woman on the ID.

"We have policies in place to prevent theft to include trigger locks on rentals, valid ID kept during the rental and credit card use for the transaction," store officials said in the alert. "The employee that rented her the firearms did not follow company policy and accepted cash for the rental."

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9 minutes ago, crash_davis said:

I anxiously await the tragic news story which may come from this.

 

https://cbsaustin.com/news/local/woman-steals-machine-gun-from-converse-shooting-range-alert-says-bexar-county-texas-sheriff-deputies-report-firearms-evidence-photos

According to an alert the store owner sent out on Monday, the woman came in and rented a handgun to use on the firing range. A few minutes later, she rented a Heckler Koch Fully Automatic 9mm MP5, submachine gun, but instead of going out to the shooting range, she walked out of the store, hopped into a white Ford Ranger and drove off.

The Texas driver's license given to rent the firearms was what store officials said in an alert "from someone who was killed in a car fire in December 2022." They said the woman looked similar to the woman on the ID.

"We have policies in place to prevent theft to include trigger locks on rentals, valid ID kept during the rental and credit card use for the transaction," store officials said in the alert. "The employee that rented her the firearms did not follow company policy and accepted cash for the rental."

Ban cash.

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2 hours ago, closetohumping said:

Kill a man in his sleep? 90 days in jail.

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Imagine being such a needle dick that you need to be strapped while out for a jog.

Man shoots and kills dog while running in Colorado Springs neighborhood

Quote

COLORADO SPRINGS, Colo. (KKTV) - A dog has died from its injuries after it was shot by a runner near the Citadel Mall Monday morning.

According to police, the dog had followed its owner from their home to a nearby parking lot, where the owner was helping a neighbor with groceries. As they were unloading the car, a man and woman out running passed by. Officers were told the runners appeared to be arguing.

The dog was off leash and reportedly approached the runners.

“The male produced a gun and shot [the] unleashed dog,” a police lieutenant wrote on the Colorado Springs Police Department blotter.

The suspect then kept running and was nowhere to be found when officers arrived.

“Unfortunately, the dog passed away because of the injuries sustained from the shooting,” a CSPD spokesperson told 11 News.

Police say a motive in the shooting is unclear. The owner said they didn’t know the suspect and that their dog wasn’t acting aggressive. The suspect is not believed to live in the area.

The shooting was reported at 9:45 Monday morning in the area of De Cortez Street and Tia Juana Street. Anyone with information should contact the Colorado Springs Police Department at 719-444-7000 or Crime Stoppers at 719-634-STOP. Crime Stoppers tips can be made anonymously.

 

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10 minutes ago, DefinitelyNotHollywoodColt said:

Imagine being such a needle dick that you need to be strapped while out for a jog.

Man shoots and kills dog while running in Colorado Springs neighborhood

 

I'm conflicted.  I might have equal disdain for a pencil dick who carries a gun when out for a jog and a jackass who doesn't leash his dog.  Hmmmm Any way to put both of them in prison?

 

My folks live in a very rural area where asshole city folk drop their dogs off when they get tired of them, which, from time to time, leads to packs of aggressive wild dogs attacking people.  I don't fault someone in that scenario, especially an older person, for carrying protection.   The linked story above sounds like it was in an urban/suburban area though.

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On 5/9/2023 at 5:31 AM, 956 Worldwide said:

This tiny ducked lunatic apparently read news reports about people getting shot for no reason and said “fuck yeah.” He went on his FB business page to brag about almost shooting a six year old looking for her cat.
 

https://www.npr.org/2023/05/03/1173377876/meteorologist-iweathernet-chris-robbins-doorbell-gun

image.thumb.jpeg.9dd11d56748d09124b38c865ff6113de.jpeg

That just makes me want to ring his doorbell

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  • 2 weeks later...

Uh, something about this guy tells me a group of dad's approaching him might cause him to act even more stupidly.  Which means  there's a good chance he'll raise his weapon.  Which means there's a chance some of the dads may attempt to disarm him.  Which means this guy may very well open fire because of "self-defense, they were going for my weapon, and were gonna use it against me." 

He's either doing this for that provocation reason or for national notoriety, which he now has.  The third option is he's fucking insane and thinks he's protecting a school bus stop from Antifa rioters or Catholic Priests.  In which case he shouldn't own that weapon, or be allowed to roam free near children with it at the very least.  

Also, his attire is creepy as shit.  

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27 minutes ago, fattyflattie said:

A large group of dads need to be there everyday until he stops this shit.  Dumbfuck needs a beating. 

Counterpoint: this is exactly the predictable, natural, and inevitable end-point (well, that's a lie -- the end-point is even worse) of current right-wing gun policy.  Remember, the GQP has fought tooth and nail for full open carry of damned near everything everywhere at all times.  With complete disregard for the fact that there are a shitload of places where if you show up with a gun, it's a real fucking problem.  

If you want to make a political statement, carry a sign.

If you are making a statement by carrying a gun -- which is an instrument of death -- you are a fucking terrorist.  It meets the definition, for a good fucking reason.  

Just remember that according to the legal framework that the gun nuts have successfully fought tooth and nail to establish, this is a policy VICTORY, and this guy isn't doing ANYTHING wrong.  Not unless and until he actually raises the weapon and starts mowing down kids.  The difference between "not doing anything wrong" and "blew away a kid" being measured in tenths of seconds.  

Edited by Brisketexan
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WE MUST HARDEN BUS STOPS!  

Armed Bus Drivers! Locks!  Fewer Doors!  Cameras!  Reinforced barricades! 

"Well, it's not like a building or anything.  It's just a patch of grass at the end of the block."

Then we'll get Terry with an assault rifle to secure the lawn! 

"Terry?  The dude with the drooling problem that's always talking to himself?"  

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5 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

Counterpoint: ...

If you want to make a political statement, carry a sign.

Good idea.  Maybe someone will start standing next to him with a different sign every day.  Signs like "I'm not with numbnuts ->" or "Look at this dumb motherfucker." or "He was dropped on his head as an infant." or "Kids, this is what happens when you don't eat your vegetables."  Annoy his ass to Bolivia.

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Or just text a photo of him to his employer saying, "Do you know why you can't find Terry everyday for the 3:00p sales meeting?  Here he is cosplaying near my children."  It looks like the kind of nice neighborhood where you probably have to work to afford a home there.  Then again, he also looks like somebody who might snap and shoot up his workplace after being fired.  You humiliate him too much around the HOA, and he could lash out at the next meeting or pot luck summer picnic.  

There's not really a lot of ways to deal with somebody like this.  But goddamn, I will fight to the death to defend his right to do it!  

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