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Official "Fuck this stupid ass-commercial" thread


Prepuce of Doom

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19 minutes ago, Billy Pilgrim said:

I’ve been annoyed with the Northwestern Mutual commercials shown during bowl season- specifically, the ones with the bratty kids. The one that pisses me off most is the teen-age daughter busting her dad’s balls for not taking her to a friend’s house while he’s mowing the yard so he decides to buy her a pool. Then there’s the family who takes their daughter to Hawaii but the little bitch is bored the whole time.

as R kelly sings.... shes only 7 once.............................

 

 

 

Edit:  too soon?

Edited by AUS-97HORN
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On 1/11/2019 at 10:52 AM, Billy Pilgrim said:

I’ve been annoyed with the Northwestern Mutual commercials shown during bowl season- specifically, the ones with the bratty kids. The one that pisses me off most is the teen-age daughter busting her dad’s balls for not taking her to a friend’s house while he’s mowing the yard so he decides to buy her a pool. Then there’s the family who takes their daughter to Hawaii but the little bitch is bored the whole time.

My buddy hates that commercial so much that he will come back into the room when he hears it just to yell at the TV.

He recently learned he'll be having a daughter in a few months.  I told him I'll be helping her with her first word: dad-uh

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some insurance company- really any insurance company- needs to come out with an ad about how terrible all insurance ads are.

"here at surly mutual we know what's important to you and your family- commercials. why are all the ads for insurance companies so terrible? we at surly mutual are committed to bringing you only the best in television advertisement." 

then it fades out to reveal some artie lange looking dude sitting in his la•z•boy actually watching the commercial on his own TV. he freaks out, screams something about how all these insurance ads are driving him nuts, throws the remote at the TV and the TV explodes and starts a house fire. "looks like we're gonna need to call surly mutual."

boom. done. better than every insurance ad out there today. 

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19 hours ago, BadgerHorn said:

My buddy hates that commercial so much that he will come back into the room when he hears it just to yell at the TV.

He recently learned he'll be having a daughter in a few months.  I told him I'll be helping her with her first word: dad-uh

 

12 hours ago, NorthLoop said:

In the correct world the "Dad-uh" bitch has to mow the rest of the yard before she gets to go to her friends house. 

Why can’t Little Miss ride her bike to her friend’s house?

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On 1/6/2019 at 7:04 PM, Goo Punch said:

oh and for those fortunate ones who've never seen the OK babysitter commercial, it's a multiracial gay couple with an ethnic, hipster babysitter. it's too much.

 

The extended version on PornHub is pretty good, though.

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I'm not sure if it's been mentioned in this thread but just in case not I want to let any potential contractors know that I'm ready. I am awaiting your call to fly to Hollywood and murder the person who keeps green lighting the Discover Cash Back Cash match people commercial with the Asian girls. I do not blame the girls. Or Asia. But I want to kill every single person involved with this ad. I mean I've already admitted to my crimes here. I'm willing to go to jail for the rest of my life and have my children raised by The Simpsons and Bunk'd. It's fine. As long as we can get rid of those commercials. 

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it's very "2019" that "shitting on dedicated fathers" is a theme in today's national ads. the same driving force behind making sure every commercial has as many races, genders, and clutures as possible would be the same ones to decide that shitting on your dad who just spent his evening saving your date night or who's currently mowing your lawn would be acceptable and well received. 

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also, all of this "diversity" usually isn't even authentic diversity. it's usually just a white washed version of a non-white person. I just saw some rx ad tonight for chron's featuring a band consisting of: white girl lead singer and white girl guitarist, black drummer, long-haired japanese looking bassist, and then probably an indian or hispanic looming member as well, i can't remember. except that they were all dressed like hipster doofuses. that's not diversity, that's a bunch of hipsters. your little bohemian fantasy friends only exist in TV commercials, thus making it faux diversity at the end of the day.

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also, all of this "diversity" usually isn't even authentic diversity. it's usually just a white washed version of a non-white person. I just saw some rx ad tonight for chron's featuring a band consisting of: white girl lead singer and white girl guitarist, black drummer, long-haired japanese looking bassist, and then probably an indian or hispanic looming member as well, i can't remember. except that they were all dressed like hipster doofuses. that's not diversity, that's a bunch of hipsters. your little bohemian fantasy friends only exist in TV commercials, thus making it faux diversity at the end of the day.

Hey man, annoying hipsters who you wanna kill can be ANY race now - that’s progress!
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20 hours ago, Goo Punch said:

some insurance company- really any insurance company- needs to come out with an ad about how terrible all insurance ads are.

"here at surly mutual we know what's important to you and your family- commercials. why are all the ads for insurance companies so terrible? we at surly mutual are committed to bringing you only the best in television advertisement." 

then it fades out to reveal some artie lange looking dude sitting in his la•z•boy actually watching the commercial on his own TV. he freaks out, screams something about how all these insurance ads are driving him nuts, throws the remote at the TV and the TV explodes and starts a house fire. "looks like we're gonna need to call surly mutual."

boom. done. better than every insurance ad out there today. 

They did, it's with Dennis Quaid

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11 hours ago, Goo Punch said:

also, all of this "diversity" usually isn't even authentic diversity. it's usually just a white washed version of a non-white person. I just saw some rx ad tonight for chron's featuring a band consisting of: white girl lead singer and white girl guitarist, black drummer, long-haired japanese looking bassist, and then probably an indian or hispanic looming member as well, i can't remember. except that they were all dressed like hipster doofuses. that's not diversity, that's a bunch of hipsters. your little bohemian fantasy friends only exist in TV commercials, thus making it faux diversity at the end of the day.

Want to hate this commercial even more? Pay attention to her "singing" and then the way they interact with each other like a bunch of deaf mutes who haven't discovered sign language. 

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8 hours ago, Okie State said:

So now a razor company is implying most men are scum. What a time to be alive.

Haven’t see the commercial so I’ll reserve judgement but if a fucking corporation is going to come off as telling me how I can go about being a better man they can fuck the hell off.  “Lady Bic” will shave my legs just as well as a Gilette thank you very much. 

Edit didn’t see the link above.  Fuck Gilette 

 

Edited by Lhorn
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On 1/16/2019 at 8:52 AM, Knoxtnhorn said:

I NEVER visit CR and my Twitter feed is 100% sports, weather, and breaking news.  That being said, I did take the time to go to Gillette's Twitter to tell them to F off.

Sounds like you are in serious need of detoxifying your masculinity.

 

 

(Please know that is sarcasm on my part).

Edited by Uncle Nate
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