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Posts posted by AM Wood
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It’s people like that slug that will assure the most amount of people will die from this. I hope she dies in an aids related fire.
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2 hours ago, futureman said:
having your girl eat your ass is a hell of a thing, but bidet or no bidet you should soap your starfish in the shower before letting her do that.
and make her gargle with lysol before kissing you.
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1 minute ago, Brothahorn said:
Sweater Gawd almost had to throat punch her yesterday. The Summerwood H-E-B is out of shit paper, including her favorite brand. I tell her to just go online, Amazon, Walmart, Target and just find some. Well none of those have her brand and roll size, so she calls me panicked. Even in a time of crazy she doesn’t have sense to just buy whatever is available.
Next she got my mom involved. And her being an old person with a Sams card, just happened to have an extra case that we could have. Damned if I drive 2 hours just for a case of TP.
Besides I got an emergency stash in my bathroom upstairs.Please enlighten me; why do you need to load up on toilet paper for the ‘rona?
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I’ve been a bidet aficionado for many years and it was this thread that brought me to the light.
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Ask Bobby Kneivel. You got to get better shocks.
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also, diarrhea is a dish best served cold.
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15 hours ago, crash_davis said:
The Salmon of Capistrano.
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55 minutes ago, PilotsError said:
My friend's wife requires everyone in the house to wipe down/towel off/completely dry the shower tub and walls when they're done. They've been doing it for almost 20 years.
They’ve made some great advances in science and now you can get them made in various waterproof materials.
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11 hours ago, futureman said:
kung fupa could wreck shit on people. amazing athleticism to be that fuckin fat.
Bruce LeenCuisine could wreck about 10 x 6 year olds at a time.
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10 hours ago, Buzzrock said:
You’re on to something. This approach helps avoid the inevitable “you don’t listen to me!” rant. Another good tactic is just occasionally repeat something back to her. “Really, Susan actually said that to you?” and then you can tune out for a few more minutes. Try it. They really think you’re listening.That’s a lot of effort. I just occasionally raise my eyebrows inquisitively , or nod my head a little.
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49 minutes ago, nnm said:
Beginner luck!
sincerely,
mister Miaggi after loosing chopsticks fly catching competition to Danielson.
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23 minutes ago, Snake Diggity said:
“It’s going to be hot today but we have inherent weather coming tomorrow.”
vocabulary is definitely not one of here inherent strengths.
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14 minutes ago, Anastasis said:
Mrs. A: "Hey A, I saw some nano-puff jacket on sale for $138. You want me to order you one."
Sure. I can use a new rain coat.
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16 minutes ago, utee94 said:
You can get the same style at JC Penney's for $17. Also water resistant. So, I just saved you assholes $283. You're welcome.
I’m afraid that sleeping bag with pockets from J.C. Penney isn’t quite the same in styling or thermal function.
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2 minutes ago, Anastasis said:
I told her that there was a place in Oak Hill that did wash and fold and that she should view this as a delivery service and run the numbers on what she thinks she could do on the markup.
And then I suggested to her that there was a full load in the laundry bin if she wanted to try her hand.
You know if she could coordinate Uber to do the pick up, take it to the wash and fold people, and the shipt to deliver their clean clothes and groceries she might be on to something there.
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1 minute ago, Anastasis said:
So wife stepped back from her career last year, so that she could focus on spending time with the kids and other shit that doesn't involve generating income.
I told her to start thinking about business ideas in the background and shit. Haven't really pressed the issue. She comes to me today and has the next great idea. There have been a few others. None really viable.
This one is a laundry wash and fold service.
It took me a moment to digest.
She did not particularly appreciate the suggestion that she pilot the service in our own fucking house for some reason.
Well she could pilot it in a laundromat to give her some idea of overhead. And, she could even pay the people who work at the laundromat who get paid next to nothing to wash and fold for her.
oh, I guess someone already does this for less than minimum part time wage with no benefits.
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9 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:
Wife left her purse at the restaurant last night. Realized it when she got home. Drove back and it was still there.
How in the holy hell does a woman not remember to get a purse? You walked in with exactly one thing ... and forget it. I have a phone, keys, wallet, and sunglasses that I take everywhere. Out of those 4 things, I've forgotten my wallet ONE time in the last 30 years. Like, I just don't understand how, when you get up from a place that is not your couch, you don't turn around and look to see if you've left anything. I can't recall the last time my wallet has fallen out of my back pocket when sitting down. I STILL look at the table, chair, and floor before I walk out of any place that I go. /end rant
So why didn’t you see her purse?
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3 hours ago, TKthunder2 said:
Today I took down a perfectly good bronze curtain rod and replaced it with a nickel one because it was “better”. When pressed for more details on what made it better....tone.
At least I got to use one of the existing anchor holes and didn’t have to worry about leveling it.
So bless.
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it's like frollicking around in the alps like that jewish family did in the sound of music.
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4 minutes ago, chikin23 said:
Any good recs on a travel model?
Yes. Travel to Europe. They have them all over the place.
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Countryisms
in Lulz
Sweating like Britney Spears taking the SAT’s
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52 minutes ago, Hate said:
I have finally decided to get on the bidet thread and placed an order for the Luxe Bidet Neo 185 (Elite Series) this morning. It should be here tomorrow. I am strangely excited for its arrival.
Welcome to team clean hole.
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5 hours ago, blacklab said:
My wife is always doing this as well. I've been out of town for 3 days and got home tonight. She works in a day care part time.
Driving home from the airport She told me "The kids at school can't play with the water anymore. None of the other teachers would do anything about it, but it's very dangerous. I had to go to Patty and explain what was going on and next time I passed by someone was in there fixing it."
I have no fucking idea what she is talking about.
Jebus Christ it’s exactly this.
Vic Mackey's Friend's Food Thread
in Lulz
Posted · Edited by AM Wood
mmmm! grapefruit and beans.