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ShowmeyourTDs

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Posts posted by ShowmeyourTDs

  1. 3 hours ago, Bodacious Bevo said:

    First scrimmage. Sark dials up a swing pass. Catalon sees it coming. JWhitt executes a great block, as expected, but Catalon’s pure violence blows him up. Every tendon in JWhitt’s body snaps. Catalon can feel his shoulder tearing but knows to finish the play. Boom, big hit on Brooks. Catalon’s other shoulder tears and Brooks spontaneously develops seven hernias in his thigh. Worthy and Neyor are closest to the action as the two play side receivers. They come over to help. Neyor trips, tearing his ACL. X extends his hand to help Brooks up. It breaks on contact. Amidst the carnage, a loud shrieking erupts. Players and coaches turn towards the noise. Is that a monkey running towards the field? 

    Yes, it is in fact a monkey, but what does it have in its hands?  Suddenly, Brent Venables springs out of a trash can exclaiming “come back with my bag of dicks”.  A shadow creeps across the field as Bert Auburn shanks a 42 yard field goal attempt straight into the welcoming nuts of the blow-u coach. As the entire team turns their attention to the massive object on the horizon that is blocking the sun, Kelvin Banks whispers do I smell ham?

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  2. 2 hours ago, Zeus said:

    Obviously but the game can't be called that because it's entirely from the prospective of the Texas fan. Wouldn't exactly sound right to the national audience. 

    Since for whatever dumb reason we can't call it a Red River Shootout they need to just eliminate the Red River part and change the name entirely. 

    Battle for the Golden Hat

    Fuck Jerry Jones Game

    Burnt Orange Red Game

    Longhorn vs. a fucking mobile home Game

    Texas Oklahoma Game

    I suck at this but you get the idea

    How about The Greatest Rivalry Game in college Football … brought to you by the tears of Texaggy.com

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