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Dances with Dachshunds

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Posts posted by Dances with Dachshunds

  1. 2 minutes ago, Hook'Em0608 said:

    I appreciate the words. And yes, I know how lucky I am with my wife. She's also a veteran (former medic) so I think that helps. 

    You are welcome brother. You are definitely lucky to have someone close by that understands because she's been there too. My best friend is who I confide in the most. He is a veteran, and I can talk to him freely, without judgement, and he understands. He lives about 9 hours away, so I mainly text, talk on the phone and Skype. But it helps a lot. 

  2. Cactus, not sure your remarks were for me, or to all of us in  general. I'm seeing a VA mental health doc, but she is there mainly to diagnose and try to find the right med or meds to ease the symptoms with a little listening/counseling thrown in if there is time. and get you in the pipeline for counseling/further treatment. I am trying to make it to the voluntary group therapy sessions. But it's one thing to talk to someone you have developed a sort of trust with , and another to sit in front of a group you don't know (even though they are your peers and in the same boat you are). It's especially tough for me as I've had a bad experience with military/VA mental health before. (long story, don't want to talk about it.) But I am trying, and I will get there. One step at a time.

    You are right spot on with your comments though. If you are fighting something as well, hang in there, seek help and you will get better. 

  3. 16 hours ago, Dances with Dachshunds said:

    1. George HW Bush

    2. John McCain

    3. Stan Lee

    4. Jimmy "Peanut 1" Carter

    5. Kirk Douglas

    6. Ruth B. Ginsburg

    7. Doris Day

    8. Olivia De Haviland

    9. Jerry Brown

    10. Carol Channing

    How's that?

    Just disregard post of 3/26 at 1801 hrs

  4. 2 hours ago, Hook'Em0608 said:

    So...I've recently been diagnosed with PTSD. I'm an Army veteran and was involved in some very heavy combat in Iraq. For a decade I've considered myself lucky so I never sought any help. So many of my friends from those days lives have completely fallen apart. Suicide, Alcoholism, drug use, divorce, prison, all around failure in life, etc. I'm fairly successful and still am married to the same woman. Have two kids who think I'm great. What is there to complain about? I was also one of those guys who considered admitting I have an issue showed weakness. 

    Anyway, my wife has long told me I'm a recluse and not the same person she married. She still stands by me and we hardly even fight. I feel really lucky. I was one of the most outgoing people you could meet in my youth. I didn't join until my mid twenties so I had lived a little bit before going off to war. I loved being around people and loved hanging out with friends. I had a large group of friends and my time off was full of plans. I truly enjoyed a night out with friends and being in public. 

    However, I know the way I live currently isn't "normal". I don't ever want to go into public outside my job. My job requires me to be a "social butterfly" and I excel at it. It's the weirdest thing, when I'm at work, I never have an issue with anxiety. I simply do my job. 

    However, I don't go out to eat. I don't have close "friends". I don't do much of anything. When I'm feeling particularly angry, I shut myself in my room and immerse myself in sports or whatever. I intentionally make my schedule so that I have at least a day or two per week where nobody is home during the day but me. It's sad but I often avoid my own family and kids. 

    I have incredible guilt over certain incidents during a deployment. I find myself angry fairly often and that's why I shut out my family and the public so often. I have extreme anxiety in large groups and refuse to go anywhere without a gun because of irrational fear. 

    When I'm driving I often forget where I'm going and find myself 5 miles past turns in towns I've driven most of my adult life. 

    I feel so relieved that I've sought help finally. A huge burden has been lifted off my chest. I truly hope now that the VA has found a service connection and confirmed PTSD I can find some peace and return to "normal". Through either medication or counseling. For the first time I'm finally ready to heal. 

    I know these issues are small compared to many on this thread. I use to read it on the other site and it helped my in some ways. I appreciate all you guys and sharing your stories and pain. I truly believe it helped me reach out finally. 

    Cheers

    Brother, you are not alone. Reading your post was eerie, like I was reading my story. I joined the Air Force in my mid 20's, used to be really outgoing, never met a stranger, etc. I was a medical technician, including some time flying as a rescue medic. My PTSD symptoms didn't show up until mid 2015, 7 years after I retired. My symptoms are very similar to yours, and my reactions too, right down to the avoiding family, friends, kids and grandkids. I had been seeing a mental health doc at the VA for depression since early 2014. I denied all the other shit that was going down in my life until late 2017. It got to the point I couldn't hide the anger, the guilt, the hermit that I had become. Now being tried on different meds looking for one or combo that works. still going through that, haven't seen much improvement yet, but a little. In the pipeline to be evaluated for one on one counseling. Pretty long wait here. There is a group that meets weekly here at the satellite clinic I go to mostly. been trying to work up the ability to go. Admitting you cant handle what is happening to you and taking that first visit is the toughest. Stay with the program, and don't give up. You will get better. It wont happen quickly, but you will get better. I don't know when you first sought help, but just in the 6 months or so since I admitted I could not take this shit anymore, but refused to check out, I have seen small, incremental improvements. You are extremely fortunate your wife understands and stands by you. That is huge. I'm not quite as fortunate. Hang in there. We will get better. Use your resources and stay the course. I tell myself these 3 things every day. And I hope and pray our brothers and sisters get help before its too late. 

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