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Jameslaw121

Certifiably Surly
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Posts posted by Jameslaw121

  1. 1 hour ago, Frank Drebin said:

    My wife is an attorney and very bright.

    But she will routinely ask me questions I could not possibly know.  Instead of just using Google.  I am her Google.

    Yesterday, the battery in her key fob went out.  She calls me at work to ask me what type of battery it takes.  How in the world should I know?  It's her vehicle.  It's a model we have never owned before this one.

    Or, do you think Saks will take this jacket back?  Like I am familiar with return policies at stores she knows I don't shop.

     

    Wait. You're wife gives specifics? Mine only uses pronouns. Mine would have said "The battery is going out, do we have one to replace it? Do you think I can return that thing I bought (that is no where in sight) when I went to that one store (that you did go to with me)"

     

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  2. On 12/6/2023 at 3:30 AM, 52-80 said:

    calendar apps that dont allow you to set the Start of Week day.

    monday is the start of the week.  thats why Sat and Sun are called the weekend.  i mean, im not using an islamic calendar damnit im using western apps.

    I know it's weird, but Friday is my start of the week. I rarely take live meetings on Fridays and use it for paperwork and to schedule all my meetings for the next week. It also gives me time to figure out what house/yard stuff I need to get done on Saturday and Sunday after knowing what family/friends plans we might have. So I can easily figure out when I'm going to get shit I need done without missing family stuff. 

    So everything I have is set to Friday, except the fitness tracker on my watch........It bugs the shit out of me

  3. 23 hours ago, Guadaloopy said:

    Apparently if you let the microwave timer run all the way down, it will explode.   You must stop the microwave with a random amount of time remaining, somewhere between 6 and 23 seconds .  The microwave will also explode if you clear the remaining time yourself.  It can only be cleared by the next person to use the microwave.  This is an immutable law of the universe.  

    The not clearing the time off when youre used to not bother me too much. But our new microwave the timer flashes until you complete the cook or clear it. 

  4. 3 hours ago, 956 Worldwide said:

    Yesterday we were driving back from my sister’s on the East Coast, an unfamiliar route. I have google maps on the phone and am using the USB jack. Unknown to me, she switched to Bluetooth while I stopped at a gas station because she wanted to listen to something on her phone when I filled up. 
     

    But she has also for some reason programmed a route home into her own google maps, only she’s got “avoid tolls” programmed.  Result: I am going absolutely fucking insane as the maps voice coming out of the speakers is completely different from what the route that is showing on my own maps, we took two wrong exits trying to figure out WTF was going on until she told me she had switched the inputs. 

    This happened to me once. I don't know how I did it, but I had the gps on no tolls. I was basically on the Ft. Worth side of DFW trying to get back to Allen. For those who don't know, basically every road over there is a toll or will become a toll if you drive more than like 2 miles on it. I was losing my fucking mind as it was making drive on service road and small side streets. Probably added 45 minutes to my trip.

     

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  5. 1 hour ago, BigHornedLurker said:

    I actually back and forth on this. It almost should be on its own list . 

    The game itself is OK, but the pageantry is in a world of its own 

    I think the thing is, almost everyone has a close relative who is either active or retired Army or Navy. With many having both in the same family.

  6. On 11/17/2023 at 3:09 PM, Biff Tannen said:

    This is a tough one.  I wouldn't run out and stop someone from parking in front of my house like that.  Then again, if I'm home, my car is on the curb already.  I've had it happen once or twice when I come home and someone is in my "spot" on the curb.  As long as it's gone in a few hours, whatever.  If they were there more than say 12 hours, we might have a problem.  Public street or not, we are living in a society.

    There is a grandma who comes over and watches her grandkids a few days a week and parks her really nice f-150 in front of my house on the curb. I really don't care, but every Sunday, I have to go over there and tell her that I'm about to mow my lawn so she might want to move her truck. She's like 70, so I'm not about to be rude to her or anything. But, it has been like 5 years of about 35 Sundays an year. And there is room in front of there house.......

  7. 24 minutes ago, Trey3216 said:

    How the hell is it that wives cannot ask you to do multiple things at once?  They always ask you to do something, you do it, then sit down on the couch or chair to enjoy your coffee/beer/12 seconds.  Then, just as you’re starting to get comfortable, they ask you to do something else.   Rinse and repeat ad infinitum.   Fucking terrorists.  

    My wife and I have a pretty good cleaning routine. She handles about 90% of the cleaning during the week (she works from home). The on Sunday mornings, after breakfast, I'll usually do more of the deep cleaning that needs to be done. I put my ear buds in and listen to the news/nfl pregame/ mlb/whatever.

    I swear to god she will wind up asking me a question within 10 seconds of every time I put the headphones on.

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  8. 1 minute ago, Smax said:

     

     

    Reading comprehension isn't your strong suit is it?

    Relationships aren't yours.

     

    Judging by your replies on this thread, your ability to understand who left who is probably.......underwhelming 

  9. On 11/10/2023 at 11:16 AM, Brisketexan said:

    T-giving has never been a big deal for our family.  This year, daughter is back home with us (yay....fucking boomerang shit, get a job, please).  Dad is an 85 yr old widower.  So, the 4 of us are going to take a nice drive out to Hyatt Lost Pines, hit their buffet, maybe walk the grounds a little bit, come back home, and be done with T-giving.

    Limited effort.  Limited crowd.  Limited opportunities for drama.  Winning.

    To be clear. The one day out of the year that celebrates eating is the one you don't celebrate????

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  10. 7 minutes ago, Frank Drebin said:

    And if you want a ceasefire after you started a war, you need to surrender unconditionally.  See Japan and Germany in 1945.

    Quote I heard on PBS (I think). "We had a cease fire with Hamas until Oct. 7th. Now we don't"

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  11. 3 hours ago, Buzzrock said:

    My mechanic said the reliability on the Korean cars isn’t great. But he also said the Mazda is not quite as good as Honda and Toyota. 

    When I was around 20, my dad went with me to car shop since he was going to have to cosign. Salesman was really pushing the Kia's

    Salesman : Did you hear about the 100,000 mile warranty?

    Dad : I heard they need one.

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