Jump to content

mr. sunshine

Legacy Members
  • Posts

    2475
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Posts posted by mr. sunshine

  1. 3 minutes ago, billfromlaketravis said:

    Goodell looks like he’s been hanging out with Elko. 

    Close but I understand Goodell once ate a granola bar but as we all know Elko subsists on Vienna sausages, hogs head cheese and white bread

    • Drool 1
  2. 4 minutes ago, Blotto said:

    these player interviews are a great reminder of how dumb most of these guys are. 

    So I take it you're skeptical about the term "scholar athlete"? 

    What was the SEC school whose library burned down years ago and a rival coach suggested they ought to buy new coloring books? LSU?

  3. On 4/22/2024 at 6:52 PM, RPM said:

    If you like this stuff, check out Conan Without Borders. The Cuba episode was epic for so many reasons. May be the best show he's ever done.

    Also his secretary/assistant has at least a couple of huge interesting things in her sweaters but unfortunateIy I can't quite put my fingers on them. If she can't get laid in Serbia there's a word for Serbian dudes but I won't repeat it here

  4. 2 hours ago, closetojumping said:

    CFB had some weird and significant turnover this cycle and some key guys that I really enjoy rooting against have moved on to other things. Harbaugh is off to the NFL. Jimbo Fisher is bootlegging moonshine in the Appalachians somewhere. Nick Saban retired in order to commit himself full time to finding the true killers of open competition in the sport. Shit like that. 

    In any event, I enjoy the pettiness of being a fan for a sport I love and it's the offseason, so I figured I'd throw some thoughts around as to who I think the good, bad and ugly guys that are coaching CFB these days. I am excluding Twelve Win Theven because ... no shit he's one of the nice guys. Absurdly, he'd have been on the "Ugly" list a decade ago. 

    The Good - Coaches I begrudgingly respect who seem to have their shit together and run a strong program. 

    Kalen Deboer - sure, he's now at Bama and there are going to be some adjustments, but he's won everywhere he's been and seems like a nice enough guy compared to the landscape. I've made fun of his transition to Bama and no one knows if this dude can recruit worth a shit, but I am betting he'll win at Bama, albeit in more normal ways. 

    Lane Kiffin - He gets weird reactions from people, but by all accounts, he's an entertaining guy. Kind of an asshole, but he's a coach. The dude wins, he is willing to troll anyone, he seems to have learned from his mistakes, and there's never a dull moment with him. I think he'll be fun to go up against in the SEC.

    Chris Klieman - Great fit at KSU. One of the only non-whiny bitches left in the legacy Big 12. He wins. Hard not to respect their approach. 

    Mike Norvell - I know there was a lot of whining from Norvell and all of FSU. I can also understand it. Get past that and this guy is known as a nice guy and a great developer. FSU getting their share in the SE is good for Texas as it weakens the other threats in that direction. 

    Kirby Smart - Obvious respect for the titles with the best team money could buy at the time. He's a cheating hypocrite, but the guy has won two titles and has Georgia near the top every year.

    Mike Gundy - Yeah, he's a whiner, but he's usually entertaining and he's been winning due to coaching for longer than anyone else out there. He had no business having the 2023 team in the Big 12 title game. 

    The Bad - Outright villains, imbeciles, or just other guys I don't like for some reason.

    Mario Cristobal - This guy is both a sorry, cheating fucking hypocrite and a terrible coach. Him pulling a Kevin Steele last season in the Georgia Tech game was a personal highlight of mine. I hope for nothing but failure for both this guy and Miami overall.

    Lincoln Riley - I think Riley is an offensive genius. I also think he runs a soft program and wears out his welcome. He'll be flirting with the NFL again this year. 

    Ryan Day - Never mind the mounting evidence of his rampant pederasty, this gasbag can't beat his program's long time rival and he almost cried on national tv because Lou Holtz made him feel funny.

    James Franklin - The biggest charlatan in all of CFB. He's helped cover up rape controversies, he can't win games without simply outtalenting the opponent, and fuck Penn State.

    Marcus Freeman - I've seen him make too many boneheaded moves to view him as anything other than a chaser who will never get it done in South Bend. The fuck-ups last season against OSU were pathetic.

    Dave Aranda - This guy is pile-driving the Baylor program into the ground. It's glorious.

    Matt Campbell - He's one of these guys that can put a winning team together when he shouldn't be able to, but then shits himself every time he has to deal with expectations. Couple that with his penchant for whining at press conferences, trying to fight his team's fans, and being a smug douchebag when he's been able to get anything done and he's easy to despise. 

    Dabo Swinney - It's not that he's a hypocrite, it's that he's also a pure dumbass. He won two titles in a different era and keeps expecting everything to shift back to the way it was so he can win some more. I'm enjoying watching him and his program wander off back into the wilderness. 

    The Ugly - Coaches who might actually just be ugly, or who run ugly programs, or have something else weird going on.

    Sam Pittman - Bigger bitch tits than Meatloaf. Hired Bobby Petrino out of desperation.

    Matt Rhule - Rumors of chronic halitosis and drunkenly calling players and opposing coaches in the middle of the night to harangue them might be his undoing. His mouthbreathing with that stupid look on his face every time the camera pans to him is moderately disturbing.

    Biff Poggi - This man is tired of your shit and also sleeves. He's a disgusting fatbody who probably reeks of mung beans on the sidelines.

    Bret Bielema - In 2023, he escalated his race with the rest of CFB to be the fattest HC on the sidelines since Mark Mangino by taking his overall weight to what has to be beyond 5 bills.

    Brent Venables - He looks like Willem Dafoe as the Green Goblin without trying. His QB play is even uglier. 

    Mack Brown - I expect Kuato to distend from Brown's torso on the sidelines this fall after North Carolina loses yet another heartbreaker to some shitty ACC also-ran. 

    Hugh Freeze - The worst part about this hypocrite isn't his use of religious piety to weasel his way into a recruit's mother's heart, it's that he wins. I hope he catches syphilis from the random hookers/coeds he's undoubtedly banging at Auburn.

    Mike Elko - The Elk weighs a metric ton and has the alcoholic's nose to which Matt Rhule could only aspire. If you told me that he ate a baby and plays a mean bagpipe, I'd be inclined to believe you.

     

    Anyone else have a thought or a list? 

     

     

    Solid list but I gotta respectfully disagree about Deboer, Norvell and Gundy but what the fuck do I know

  5. On 4/20/2024 at 8:48 PM, mr. sunshine said:

    Hint: I'm the lighter skinned fellow. 60 now but would gladly smoke all your sorry asses. Easier to smoke than the joint I'm currently working on. Pussies

    IMG_0332.jpeg

    Surely some of y'all remember Eugene Seale. He was a "scab" for the Oilers during the NFL strike and hung around when the so-called professionals returned and was an All Pro special teams player. Before that he got a scholarship offer when Bill Yeoman was at UH but it got pulled and he went to Lamar. Coincidentally UH had scheduled Lamar for a couple of non conference games and Eugene set a record with 40+ solo tackles in those two games. So suck it Bill Yeoman's ghost and fuck Cougar High as always

    • Hook 'Em 5
×
×
  • Create New...