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Brew

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Posts posted by Brew

  1. 1 hour ago, shadow_operative said:

    specified in the OP and reiterated countless times. if you aren't talking about this ^^^, then we are not talking about the same thing. you don't get to change the subject and then tell me that i'm off base. i mean you can if you want to, but it's counterproductive and at a certain point just disingenuous.

    BUT DERKA THERES OTHER DEFINITIONS OF "BEING OFFENDED." great. start your own thread about those then. stop just repeatedly interjecting them into conversation as if it's germane to the subject, at least when you're addressing me.

    Offense is strictly judged in the purview of the offended, not the offender. It’s on the offender to understand their position if they so choose and that takes some level of empathy on their part. Then there are certain terms that go a step further and are held by polite society to be offensive no matter what. You being the speaker rather than the spoken to in this case doesn’t give you any right to make a determination on what is offensive. You have to actually listen to the other side to understand offense which isn’t your strong suit.

    Your position on some of this feels a lot like the “I have a black friend” argument to prove they aren’t racist just for the record.

     

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  2. 3 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

    specified in the OP and reiterated countless times. if you aren't talking about this ^^^, then we are not talking about the same thing. you don't get to change the subject and then tell me that i'm off base. i mean you can if you want to, but it's counterproductive and at a certain point just disingenuous.

    Sweet, you’re not offended. Got it, others (really all) are and have explained their position. Now what would you like to discuss?

  3. 17 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

    man a whole bunch of you have trouble reading. i've already answered your question multiple times in this thread, but here it is once more for posterity:

    a gang of people who all have mentally disabled loved ones came into this thread and passionately advocated against anyone using any language which even could be used in a derogatory manner towards an ill/handicapped person, even if it wasn't being used in such a way, eg, "that event was retarded."

    i have simply pointed out that if these people truly felt that way then they would deem personal attacks on me and/or any other mentally ill person to be equally offensive. however they clearly do not feel that way based on their years long history of failing to admonish the people who take such jabs and pot shots. that gusto and vim and vigor only exists for them when it affects ya then personally, and is not the overarching "morality" that they claim it to be. pretty simple stuff here.

    Or you still clearly don’t grasp the entire conversation of this thread. 

    13 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

    we are going in circles. i specified exactly what i was talking about in my OP, and i have repeatedly re-posted it when people like you stray way off course. you continue to do nothing but completely ignore this, and then tell me that i'm taking offense to a bunch of posts in this thread, again, based on your own tangential musings, and not my specific definition from my own OP. every single thing you're typing is superfluous.

    bottom line, you have zero interest i honestly addressing what i've written, and are clearly on some tangential crusade to make this about whatever you want it to be about, and not what my OP specifically states. i'll leave you to that. have fun. 

    Basically, we’re back to the issue at hand of you just wanting to use that word and no one be offended because being offended is stupid. For some reason I’m also curious on your point at this point if that isn’t it. I’ve tied my response back to your original post, he’s tied his around and quoted individual portions. Maybe you should reread your first post and give us a concise summary of what you want to discuss. I’m happy to respond directly to posts/questions rather than just blowing them off like you seem to want to do and insisting we aren’t reading what you wrote correctly.

  4. 2 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

    what makes you think the meds comment offended me? was it my single-sentence, tongue in cheek response to the post? or maybe it was my total lack of outrage, or neg rep, or literally anything indicating that it offended me? 

    i have referred to that post solely for the purpose of pointing out other people's hypocrisy. the post did not offend me in any way. but uh, keep in telling yourself that you what i'm thinking and feeling better than i do. 👌🏼 

    So you think it should be offensive and are just pointing out double digit times that others are posting offensive stuff but personally you’re not offended and just want others to see the hypocrisy in the non offensive post that is actually offensive just not to you?  Got it, thanks for clarifying.

  5. 11 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

    no, i'm honestly responding to whatever that last post of yours was. a)it in no way addressed the post you quoted and were ostensibly replying to, and b) i have zero clue as to what you are talking about with the rest of your post, specifically this idea that i've been ducking addressing some statement made by the special olympics. i have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. 

    You clearly don’t understand the difference between derogatory and just being generally offended. You also don’t care to learn. It’s a waste of time discussing it with you, which is usually how I walk away from one of your threads after getting roped in. 

    I thought it was an act at points in the past like a Chad Briscoe or Helo. Clearly it isn’t or you’re just all in on it.

  6. 20 minutes ago, shadow_operative said:

    i don't understand how either of you thinks you can tell me that you know what we're talking about here and that i don't, when i am the one who explicitly specified what we're talking about in the first place. anything that isn't explicitly addressing my original, specifies statement (so, everything dahobbs said after acknowledging exactly what k was specifically talking about, and most everything else that he and others have said) is superfluous.

    so many people in this thread have gone off on their own tangents and taken in directions where i never intended it to go, and that's fine, but you don't get to go off on a tangent that isn't germane or specific to the OP and then act like you're still addressing what this post started out as.

    This one response is the essence of “derka” and the negative connotation it takes when referring to the many way things get derka’d around here. Reread paragraph #1 of post #1. Maybe you forgot where you started. 
     

    As far as paragraphs 2 and 3, you’ve clearly been offended by things that have been said in this thread including the meds comment which completely invalidates that whole train of thought. Not to mention the posts you quoted are trying to help you understand “offensive” and you have been involved in that very discussion.

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  7. 14 minutes ago, Dahobbs said:

    Let's separate out a couple of concepts. 1) Whether a particular term is offensive, and 2) whether a person is actually offended by their use. 

    Any insult is, by definition, offensive. If I call you a motherfucker, a idiot, a whore, a self-centered baby, a babbling bozo, an ignoramus, or a troglodyte, every one of those would be an offensive term in that generally they are capable of or intended to cause you to be upset or hurt your feelings. Whether or not you actually are offended by any of these things depends upon your own reaction. 

    However, while all of those terms are offensive, none of them are the special category of offensive that I reference above. They are all personal to you (or to whomever they are directed), but not generally offensive to wider groups. 

    Calling someone (or something) a retard is offensive to not only the person to whom it is directed, but also the wider community of the intellectually disabled. You may not personally intend to offend someone when using that word, but you should recognize that it is an offensive term. If you choose to use it, don't be surprised when people get upset, annoyed, resentful, and angry. 

    I do know what we're talking about. The problem is that you don't. 

     

    Derka, this post is a very good explanation of the differences that you fail to grasp between the different words used. Maybe read it a couple of times before you just start responding.

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  8. 3 hours ago, shadow_operative said:

    3)this is (or has largely become) 100% about the absolute soul of this website and its predecessor. period. this all started with someone claiming (and getting lots of support) that "there is no place, in any context, for the words retarded/retard to be used on this site." that is fucking bullshit. that is objectively, factually wrong.

    my intentions when starting this thread had nothing to do with this debate about retard/retarded. that incident was simply the genesis for my thoughts about people being offended, it was never the main point. but now that it's gone that way, yeah, i think you've fucking lost your mind if you believe that the office, norm macdonald, kenny powers, shameless, etc don't belong on shaggy. that is absolutely fucking bonkers, and antithetical the very basis of this site's existence.

    I’ve been around the run of sites for years, I think you are completely missing the point of everything if you think the soul of the site is built around using those words or others in the same vein. Sure, there is a lot of shit given, a lot of friendly and sometimes unfriendly ribbing, etc but for the most part this site operates without all the bullshit you see on other sites and endures because of the people, the history, the connections, and the discussions that take place daily.

    The vast majority of those people are telling you the use of that word isn’t appropriate any more no matter what movie you want to quote, maybe just shut up and listen for once and actually read the responses with an open mind and to educate yourself on the matter.

    I’ve given numerous people on here my contact info to answer questions on tax or other things from a business perspective. I only do that because I’m no different here than I am in the real world. You’re not going to find me using any of the derogatory comments with historical context because of what they mean. That doesn’t mean I’m not going to call you a dumbass for some things that you post, but there is a clear difference in the terminology. You have a clear lack of understanding of what derogatory means if you don’t get that.

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  9. Didn’t wait tables, but basically have the same thought on tipping servers. I think I said it in the other threads though, we only eat at places we know the servers/owners when we are at home or our place at the beach. We tip well and never have an issue with anything. If something isn’t right on the food, they take care of it before it ever gets to the table. Drinks are usually on the table right when we sit down. I tip the bartender at the place we eat lunch every Sunday the same whether it’s just the two of us or the kids show up. Tipping is just the cost of going out at this point and I don’t view it any differently than the food/drink prices.

    I also tip valets well because more times than not it ends up with my vehicle being in a good location and if you are there a few days the service/time is better. All the other tipping is getting borderline B.S. though.

  10. 14 hours ago, Goofyboy said:

    16x40 pool w/ spa and sun deck and expanded patio / deck. $106k last September when we signed the contract.

    That’s a pretty good price in this market for that size. Our spa quote alone on ours was $30k or so without equipment because we were already putting heat on the pool. Deck materials and size also make huge difference in price estimates. My wife blew the top off our pool budget with those choices and the expanded patio areas. I don’t even want to add up what we have in our backyard at this point.

  11. After dropping my kid off at the airport this morning for a 10 day Jamaica trip to visit friends that live there, I’m glad we aren’t doing any traveling this summer by commercial air. The airport was the biggest clusterfuck I’ve ever seen. Luckily she has precheck and we were able to get through bag drop fairly easily, because she wasn’t making her flight if she had to stand in the regular security line. It was a mass of  pissed off people, crying people, multiple lines trying to merge into different points with people arguing, etc. Up until a couple of years ago, I flew out of this airport a couple times a month and never remember seeing it like it was this morning

  12. On 7/14/2023 at 4:57 PM, Pato del Muerto said:

    Bottom freezer with French door fridge is the better layout and the ice maker only needs to be in the fridge space if there is door dispensed ice. 
    buy one that deposits into a tub in the freezer and it’s no issue, and who really needs door ice anyway. It’s a very minor convenience. 

    Not with a Samsung. We had the bottom drawer freezer with ice maker in the bottom. The condensation lines run down the back of the internal part of the fridge and freeze up often because it goes down from the fridge and then along the back compartment of the freezer. The condensation drain line would freeze from the bottom up until it hit the fridge where the water would then drop into the area under the vegetable drawers and freeze there. Every couple of months you would have to pull apart the bottom/back of the fridge, thaw everything out and then start the clock on it freezing again. 

    Also, bottom drawer freezers are functionally useless if you freeze very much. You just pile everything in them and have no idea what is there.

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  13. 4 hours ago, Gil Bang said:

    I'm guessing that there are miserable fucks in your friend group pretending that everything is great. You'll be shocked when you learn of the many affairs.

    I can say pretty confidently in the group of couples we consider our friends, screwing around isn’t happening. I’m not saying there may not be a divorce in there at some point though, just at the moment there are no divorces within that group of people. Most of us have been together since high school / college at this point. Not everyone is automatically miserable or looking for side action because they are married. Even if I get outside of close friends to people we do things with occasionally, there still aren’t any divorces within that group that I can think of. The screwing around likelihood does go up though knowing some of them.

  14. 1 hour ago, nnm said:

    Not sure about that. There’s a lot of traffic in the divorce thread, but also guys like @Armybrat that have been married since the late 60s. I have 32 years myself. 

    24 years, kind of weird to think that at 44 years old we’re working on what we’re going to do for our 25th. No friends that have divorced either.

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  15. 48 minutes ago, The Ace of Aces said:

    I don’t own any jeans. I have no idea why they’re popular. I dislike them. 

    Nice jeans and a button down half the half the year for me before switching to shorts for the summer. I can’t remember the last time I put on a pair of slacks/khakis.

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  16. 1 hour ago, markstanco said:


    We are similar in a few ways. Political BS I stopped watching years ago. Done with Fox and cnn. Few guns, yep. I’m actually on a lot of those social media platforms but only for a business reply standpoint.

    As for your first paragraph mentioning dress code, wow how it has changed in the last 20 years. I always wore a coat seeing customers. Today I could roll up in a millet lite T and it would likely be acceptable.

    I’ve put little value in dressing up since I started with the firm but I think I still wear nice clothes. I get some comments here and there from the old timers but very few any more. I’ve made a living on what I can do for my clients and the firm, not being the guy that shows up dressed up. I met with a couple of clients today worth well into the nine figures, I had on shorts and a nice shirt. 

  17. I would get it if you don’t watch TV at all, but if you watch TV shows then what is the difference? I rarely if ever watch TV, but I’m probably more inclined to watch a movie than something else on TV if I’m going to site down with my wife and do it. In and out in less than 2 hours and I have zero commitment, don’t need to k ow the backstory, etc.

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  18. After several days of listening to short segments from the radio shows, some of these layoffs make even less sense. You have Jay Williams still on in the mornings without Max/Keyshawn, Harry Douglass at lunch without Jason Fitz, others that have moved around, etc. It’s like someone just showed up at work and said you’re fired, you stay, you’re fired, etc. with no plan on the new radio lineup.  

    I think from the radio shows, Fitz is the one that kind of sucks. Their show was actually a decent show. The morning show with Kellerman and Keyshawn was painful most days, but Fitz/Douglass and the prior Fitz/Spain shows were at least worth a listen.

  19. I don’t have a suit, because a sport coat works fine the one time a year I need one. However, that’s not counter cultural in today’s world. I wear shorts to work every day this time of year in an industry that was wearing suits not very long ago.

    I don’t order anything to be brought to me, I can pick up my own food, pick out my own clothes, walk in the grocery store, etc.

    I have virtually no social media. I come here, go to ESPN, and check out a few other sites and that’s it. No Twitter, Reddit, Facebook, Instagram, none of it.

    When did not having tats and piercings and having your hair cut become counter cultural?

    I reread and edit all of my posts, texts, emails, etc. Proper grammar still matters although I still miss plenty.

    I have 2 pair of shoes, one for shorts and one for pants. When a pair wears out, I buy a new pair.

    I have 2 handguns and 2 shotguns set up for different things and enough ammo to get me through until I feel like buying more. If I get low on ammo, I go buy more. I’m not cosplaying Call of Duty in my backyard/dreams.

    I hate politics and everything that surrounds the political arena. I don’t know that I can ever remember turning on Fox News in my life although I’m sure I have at some point.

    I feel old after reading that.

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  20. Wilmington is a great area and worth driving into for a meal/beer/day trip/whatever. We’ve been looking pretty hard at heading that direction for another beach house as we’re not really feeling buying again in FL right now. Oldest is also looking at Wake/UNC, so it would make sense to do something that direction if she ends up in NC.

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  21. As someone that has spent most of my life in a small/moderate size City of 60k-100k, it has its positives and you learn to work around the negatives. Traffic/food/lack of waiting anywhere/etc are all positives to a smaller town than the big cities. I know the owners/servers at every place we eat which is much better than having a never ending selection of places to choose from that I probably don’t want anyways. Healthcare is an easy deal as long as you are near a larger City when a significant issue comes up. The cultural aspects of larger cities are a drive away or a flight away if you want something different. I don’t know anything about NM, but some of the things being sold as negatives might not be so negative when you actually get there.

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  22. 14 hours ago, Steamboat1874 said:

    Actually only idiots listen to sports talk to begin with.

    Do you really want to listen to what “Dave in Waco” has to ask?

    Listen to music and just watch the games live.

    Fuck all of the other bullshit out there.

    Thank me later.

    Most of the national shows have very little call in content at this point. I’m not that interested in music, it’s all just noise. I like sports so I listen to people talk about sports or I listen to whatever game is on if there is one. At least I did until the firings this week, because no one on ESPN is talking about sports any more. The shows today were absolutely fucking terrible. They really had to dig deep to find the people to fill the weekend spots. 

    As far as Sirius, worth it for me. I can listen to pretty much any game on and flip between multiples. Football season when we’re on long runs back and forth to the beach, I can rotate between any game and just about any team broadcast depending on which side I want to listen to.

  23. On 7/6/2023 at 9:49 AM, slorch said:

    Basketball has been over for 2-3 weeks whatever... Nobody except hardcore fans gives a shit about NBA until November.

    ESPN owns MLB rights and it's still fucking nothing.  There's a crapton of storylines from the Reds to the Rangers on the upswing and the Braves holding serve.  Trade deadline approaches and allstar game is this coming weekend.

    Probably just me though...

    Definitely improved their content this week post layoffs, today when I’ve been in the car for three different shows I’ve heard two long conversations on an ESPN flag football league draft and now Eurovision. That is much better content than NBA for sure.

  24. On 7/3/2023 at 8:30 PM, jimmyjazz said:

    Admissions are weird.  My younger two both CAP'ed into UT.  The older is whip smart, great grades, great test scores, tons of extracurriculars, but spent so much time on music that she finished just outside of top 6%.  We did the whole SAT coaching, essay coaching thing, but CAP it was.  It worked out fine, it was online (covid) and she'll graduate pretty soon.

    The younger, while not a doorknob, is certainly not as mature, and his grades and test scores were nowhere near as high.  I had zero inkling he'd even make CAP.  He focused on smaller schools, soccer scholarships, etc.  He applied to UT anyway, which I wasn't gonna discourage, but in the back of my mind thought "yeah, right".  No SAT coaching, no essay coaching.  He wrote his essay the night before it was due, I pointed out a couple of errors but pretty much left it alone . . . and voila!  CAP'ed.  I was flabbergasted.  I honestly think it was because his essay was written by an 18 YO kid, not an 18 YO kid run through a half dozen adult editing filters.  Got thru UT-Tyler with great grades.  Any port in a storm -- he's in.

    You just never know.  Legacy, grades, scores, essays, mood of the admissions officer, whatever.  You just never know.

    It feels almost like a crapshoot at this point. Our oldest is in the college application process now and it doesn’t make much sense how it plays out at a lot of these schools. She’s definitely not going legacy admit, because the college I graduated from went under in the economic crash of the late 2000’s.

    One thing I don’t get is the current need for kids to apply to double digit colleges. It has to throw the admissions process off when only 10-20% of accepted kids actually enroll at a lot of the colleges she is looking at. I applied to one, got in, and went. She’s looking at applying to 10+ at the recommendation of the college advisor we pay (don’t even get me started on that one) with most being state schools with ultra low out of state acceptance or high end privates with low acceptance. Then she talks to other kids with 35 ACT’s that got rejected from places like UGA, UNC, UVA, etc and that keeps her in a cycle of “Oh my god, I’m going to have to go to XYZ tier whatever school.” I’m ready for this process to be over. With the youngest, I just hope she goes to college at this point and moves out.

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