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Posts posted by Sandman
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On 12/27/2023 at 2:48 PM, nnm said:Mrs NNM often asks me to do something by asking me if I want to do it:
“Do you want to take out the trash?”
The true answer is no, I don’t want to. I will be happy to do that, though, if asked nicely.
Better: “would you please take out the trash?” Answer: yes, I will happily do that for you!”
My ex-wife's move was to say "This garbage sure needs to go out", she wouldn't ask me to do it, she'd just say it out loud. I said just ask me to take it out or take it out yourself. No need for this crap. She also liked to say shit like "I sure am thirsty" instead of just asking if I would get her a drink (which I would've happily done).
Once I asked her what she would say if I walked into the room with her and announced "This laundry sure needs washed" or my personal favorite "This dick sure needs sucked". She just sulked and gave me the silent treatment.
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32 minutes ago, Neonmoon said:
Social Media has made YOU aware of the uniformity, but it has always been that way. Before tik tok, there were fashion magazines. Before fashion magazines, there were Sunday paper advertisements.
Ehh, I disagree. Yes, magazines and papers were widely available when I was a kid in the 80s but you had to seek them out. I couldn't lie in my bed and have that shit magically appear in front of me. Kids and young adults can be on the couch getting those ideas delivered to their phones with minimal effort. I don't see them walking or biking to 7-11 to buy the latest edition of Tiger Beat or Cosmo.
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I got the email from amazon that explained they were going to put ads in their streams. But I have pretty much already quit using prime video because they took all the shit I want to watch and put it into several different packages, all of which have their own monthy fees. Fuck that bullshit. I'm not paying an extra fee on top of my prime fee, eat shit Jeff.
Also, my big irritation with social media is it's making everyone act the same. People all talk the same, act the same, wear the same shit. I don't mean they all have the same accent but they use the same cadence, the same vocalizations. Every woman from 20-50 is wearing the same outfits. It's getting colder, so I'm gonna see a ton of wool wraps/puffy coats with a floppy hat, leggings or tight pants, boots. It's like they all have a uniform.
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Our Christmas went off without a hitch, no drama at all. So thankful. And plenty of leftovers to eat today.
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13 hours ago, Incredulity said:
Totally lost even though I have read this 4 times.
BIL= brother in law?
SIL= sister in law?
or is this one of the new gender/pronoun mystery/riddle/puzzles ?
SIL = Son in law
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The extended family went to a basketball game last night. My BIL got into a bit of a tiff with my future SIL. My SIL is very fired up about his sports teams, so he was yelling and cheering and let slip a couple of f-bombs and "Jesus Christ!". I wasn't really paying attention to him and it was loud as fuck, so I missed the whole "confrontation". My BIL asked him to tone down the language, as we had an 8 year old there, plus my very churchy MIL. SIL declined to tone it down and instead left. He later texted my wife to say he left to avoid causing a scene, but he felt my BIL should have spoken to him more discreetly. As I said, I missed all of this, I was watching the game and looking at my phone.
Of course, this is the year that we host the Christmas gathering, so both of the offended parties will be at my house tomorrow. I think they both need to just STFU and forget it ever happened but that would be too easy.
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5 hours ago, The Ace of Aces said:
The crowds SUCK. Regent Street was a nightmare. We avoid Leicester Square like the plague, as well as Piccadilly Circus and Covent Garden, and can't even imagine how bad they are the last two weeks.
I was there last December and I didn't think it was that bad. But I'm a very large man and people just naturally GTFO of my way, so YMMV.
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45 minutes ago, 'stache said:
These kids will be fine because their fathers have created generational wealth
I bet Adrian Peterson's kids thought they were gonna be fine too. Then daddy's doing some weird celebrity boxing bullshit because he's broke as fuck.
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On 12/19/2023 at 8:16 PM, Ravishing Rick said:
McLennan County Jail in Waco. Had piss, shit and skeet thrown at me. Constant threat of violence. Saw some horrible drug withdrawals. Men losing their jobs and marriages. Was offered sex by some female inmates, however, but declined due to risk of being thrown in jail myself.
I worked at the notorious Oklahoma County Jail for 2 years in the late 90s. Had some good coworkers but the unsanitary conditions were too much. What a dump.
Fast forward 20 years and I'm at my local county jail to get my fingerprints done for my CCL. As I waited for the officer to get the cards ready, I smelled that familiar jailhouse smell. Like sweaty ass and shit and dirty clothes that have been laying around for a couple of weeks. Talk about a blast from the past. I almost said something to her but then I realized I'd probably sound like an asshole. "Hey this disgusting smell you work in every day reminds me of when I worked in a similar shithole!".
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4 hours ago, Nivek said:
Parents are packing big jars of applesauce in their kid's lunch.
My parents were strict sticks in the mud but even they never stooped to that level. Put some cheese puffs, a sandwich, and a couple of oreos in there, for fucks sake.
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Why the fuck does every smartphone camera rotate my photos when it thinks I'm "too close" to the photo's subject? So tired of having to manually rotate the pics to where they were when I took the pic. Motherfucker, I took the pic as the distance I desired, your job is to just record the image. So dumb, there is no justifiable reason for this.
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3 hours ago, Willfully Horn said:
I think a change of hairstyles is safe to compliment.
I like what you’ve done with your hair.
I disagree. I've had multiple black female coworkers over the years who have different hair 3-4 days a week. No need to draw attention to wigs IMO.
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23 hours ago, Incredulity said:
Sometime around 2008 or so I was traveling through Duluth, Minnesota and encountered a fairly prominent coffee chain in the area named Beaners. I was stunned that I was seeing it and quite surprised that was accepted in the area. Read a few years back they changed the name, which made sense.
I can remember as a kid in the 70's, living in California and eating breakfast at Sambo's. As far as I knew, that name meant "Awesome Pancakes".
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On 12/5/2023 at 10:36 PM, Vic Mackey said:
Filling out forms online and it asks which country I'm from or located and United States isn't at the very top of the drop down list of options.
People who fill out government forms that ask for your county of residence and they put "USA" because fuck reading, I guess.
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On 11/28/2023 at 10:07 AM, Underdog said:
Pretty cool story...
I am supposed to believe that an NFL team "couldn't afford" full-time employees? GTFOH with that bullshit. Art Modell was just a cheapskate.
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I'm gonna use my list from last year and maybe change one or two. Manufacturing runs instead of trying to hit bombs:
1. Gene Hackman
2. Pope Ben 16
3. Clint Eastwood
4. Willie Nelson
5. Mel Brooks
6. Dick Van Dyke
7. Gene Shalit
8. Willie Mays
9. Jimmy Carter
10. Demi Lovato
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On 12/1/2023 at 11:03 AM, Sandman said:
I made a reservation at top golf last night, going there on saturday. I just got an email to confirm. well, no shit I plan on being there. I paid a fucking deposit. Why are these places so fucking desperate to "confirm"?
UPDATE: 90 mins before my booking, top golf texted me to see if I wanted to sign in all my players now. Fuck off.
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I mean, you can't judge the meat until the cow is dead. And noboy's gonna judge that meat but us, dammit.
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Why do I have to "confirm" every fucking thing I'm doing these days? I make a Drs appointment, they text me to confirm like 2-3 days before I'm supposed to be there. What if I have something come up the night before? I made a reservation at top golf last night, going there on saturday. I just got an email to confirm. well, no shit I plan on being there. I paid a fucking deposit. Why are these places so fucking desperate to "confirm"?
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I'm working from home this week, so I'm in the study on the phone. Wife comes in, I think to say bye before she leaves for work. As I'm talking on the phone, she whispers/mouths something and tries to stick her phone near my face. I can only see her out of the corner of my eye, so as I'm talking and typing, I look over and give her a WTF look. She mumbles something and stomps away. My call ended soon after and I go to catch her before she left. I did, and she says "I was just saying that a package is supposed to be delivered today". WHO GIVES A SHIT???, I said in my head.
Here's a text update:
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Stayed up way too late the last few days. Combined that with eating like shit and boom...I was up all night with a case of the runs. Finally tapered off around 3:30 AM. Praying I can get to sleep before 11 tonight.
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A&M hires Mike Elko
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If you had told me after the South Alabama game that we'd wind up 9-3, beat ou, but lost big in the B12CG, I'd take it in a heartbeat. Fuck ou.
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Random thoughts that don't warrant a thread
in Lulz
Posted
Why does Windex smell so good? Love that stuff.