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Posts posted by closetojumping
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I'd like to think most posters here would avoid creating the traumatizing holiday memory for a group of children of an enraged lunatic beating the shit out of Santa and being handcuffed and carted off to jail while medics tended to the moaning, badly beaten, fake Santa. I'd like to think most would prefer that not happen, but I'm probably wrong.
What I am certain of is that pretty much none of you would have actually done such a thing. It was infuriating, but I'm not asking to talk to a manager, or beating up dumb aggie Santa, or attempting to loudly address the transgression with an imbecile who is already reduced to the low point in life of wearing a costume and lying to asshole kids for $15/hour all weekend.
I lost it on an aggie that attempted to shame me for saying "Howdy" to him as I walked by in a building in downtown Houston a few years. He was so moronic and ignorant that he couldn't even fathom the concept that he was wrong, that they don't own that fucking word and that they just make everything worse by association. It was like arguing with one of those punching bags that you hit and falls backwards and then keeps springing forward again. Totally pointless.
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20 minutes ago, Burntcowboy said:
Ed outclassed everyone last night, not just Herman
Oh yeah? The entire premise was already addressed in the thread.
3 hours ago, trythisathome said:I mean, everyone in the country was outclassed by Orgeron this year
3 hours ago, Valmy77 said:To be fair, Ed Fucking Orgeron just outclassed everybody else in College Football this year.
3 hours ago, closetojumping said:No shit? Does that make it okay? How about Matt Rhule? Lincoln Riley? Ryan Day? Mario fucking Cristobal?
All guys hired when Herman was hired or after him, all outperforming him across the board and on the reg. But yeah, it’s okay, it was just Ed’s turn. Ours is probably coming up here shortly with the Hermanataur, the half bull, half retarded neanderthal roaming our sidelines and breathing loudly through his mouth into our school’s microphones.
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One of this site's great mysteries to me is how this LSU dipshit has some of the most rep of any poster. Every time I see him posting, it's useless, uninteresting, unfunny dipshittery. I can't for the life of me understand where he's putting something up in which people are then compelled to say "oh, yeah, that's good! upvote upvote upvote to you, good sir!" It's got to be a result of some bizarre circle jerking among bleeding hearts or diehard angry conservatives, whichever way he swings, in the Cloak Room or he's got a sock army. Or both. Clearly he has the time.
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47 minutes ago, nycHorn said:
If this doesn’t make it into our recruiting materials then we will never make it as a program.I need to get an image of his face juxtaposed onto some really meatheady looking half-man, half-bull and make it my new avatar. Or post it on the front of FireTomHerman.com .
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42 minutes ago, Liquor and Poker said:
This thought has bothered me for some time. I get that Mensa is a little bit scammy and markety, but you do actually have to qualify by scoring extremely high on an approved nationally-recognized test like the IQ test, or the SAT, or the MCAT. That means you have some level of applied intelligence that’s far above average at something. I’ve also met several members and across the board they were pretty impressive.
So, how??? I mean, you’ve seen what I’ve seen. We’re not talking “so smart he’s stupid” or “book smart but not street smart” here.
Is there any actual proof that the guy is in MENSA? Beyond that, don't you have to apply and pay to join? How insecure do you have to be to proactively apply to an organization that confirms to you that you're very intelligent? Anyway, there's a big difference between smart and intelligent. Some of the least impressive people I've worked with have been unquestionably intelligent as evidenced by the Ivy League degrees and test scores that they regularly reference. In early, gritty growth stages of a business, those are often the easiest to grind into dust.
38 minutes ago, TexEx15 said:Has anyone seen CTJ and Zach Smith in the same room at the same time?
You don't have to be a wifebeater to think that Tom Herman is an imbecile. But, uh, yeah, thanks for projecting that onto me.
Has anyone seen TexEx15 and Jerry Sandusky in the same room at the same time?
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4 minutes ago, trythisathome said:
I mean, everyone in the country was outclassed by Orgeron this year
3 minutes ago, Valmy77 said:To be fair, Ed Fucking Orgeron just outclassed everybody else in College Football this year.
No shit? Does that make it okay? How about Matt Rhule? Lincoln Riley? Ryan Day? Mario fucking Cristobal?
All guys hired when Herman was hired or after him, all outperforming him across the board and on the reg. But yeah, it’s okay, it was just Ed’s turn. Ours is probably coming up here shortly with the Hermanataur, the half bull, half retarded neanderthal roaming our sidelines and breathing loudly through his mouth into our school’s microphones.
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7 hours ago, TKthunder2 said:This is spot on. Have multiple parents I run into with OU, Tech and LSU shirts/hats that have seen me or my kid in burnt orange and have said “y’all had a good game this weekend” or some other benign comment in passing, but the fucking aggys have just been annoying and doing stupid shit. A few weeks ago an aggy mom was teaching her kid to hiss at my 3 year old at the check in desk for wearing his UT jersey. Next time I’m going to take a page out of your book.
I took my four little kids to see Santa after Thanksgiving a few years back, as parents do. I see Santa spending an inordinate amount of time in a conversation with my daughter and middle son, ages 6 and 4 at the time. They look concerned and they’re looking at me. My wife and I are a little like “wtf?”. Anyway, they eventually come over and we wait for the picture and check out.
My wife asks my daughter what they talked to Santa for so long about and she proceeds to explain that Santa was telling them that I won’t be getting any gifts for Christmas because I am a sip, and if they grow up to be “sips” that attend UT, they won’t get any gifts either. I realized I had a UT shirt on.
Now, that is fucking unbelievable. But it’s also a dilemma. Do you confront the fucking idiot dressed up as someone they think has some level of authority over their holiday outcomes, and become the guy that attacked Santa in public? Or just explain it away to your kids? Only an aggie is that shitty of a human being and that stupid of an individual. Which is what I explained to my children without impugning the concept of Santa as best as I could.
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Yeah, I continue to see people applying logic to their expectations for what Herman is doing with this program. There isn’t any. Just start assuming the worst possible scenario, or the dumbest, to any circumstance and you’ll stop being surprised or disappointed. We have the most rock stupid head coach in college football and he’s currently being far outclassed by the likes of Ed fucking Orgeron.
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The premise that Luhnow knew nothing is so over the top absurd that it's almost breathtaking. There are rumors that they had a fucking codebreaker doing work this year. They all knew what was going on. Hopefully they stop fucking cheating. Of course on one of the rare occasions where the cheaters actually get what they had coming to them, it's with a team I've spent my whole life cheering for, all the low valleys and the few high peaks. Meanwhile Baylor gets away with systemic rape and rape cover-ups and the entirety of the SEC cheats with impunity.
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31 minutes ago, Chuckie Finster said:
Sorry, didn't realize this statement would be looked at under a microscope. I just counted the number under "Austin" vs the number under "Houston."
Long story short, yes, Houston has Torchy's. No need to further derail this thread.
You have offended Bolero88 with your nonchalance and poor due diligence, sir. There is going to be hell to pay. You cannot, and you shall not!, run and hide.
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5 minutes ago, Tex Pete said:
They waited until ctj went to lunch on purpose.
Lunch is for wimps.
I’m working in Austin next week. I’m probably going to assassinate Herman while I’m there.
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On 12/31/2019 at 9:08 PM, Patrick Bateman said:
So, for those debating about the movie and its place within canon. This isn't really a comic book story. This is more a character story on insanity which used a lucrative and iconic comic figure as a backdrop to give it a known context. Him being 30 years older than Batman doesn't really matter. The origin not really being of canon, doesn't really matter. It's a different story or version of a character which wasn't as worried about staying true to canon or other creations. It pretty much used the character of the Joker as a vehicle to sell the tickets it needed for it's version of insanity.... Think about the movie The Machinist, but instead of not eating and becoming delusional, he puts on makeup. That may be a more suitable comparison.
https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/kevin-smith-revealed-joker-almost-152115574.html
This gives you an idea of how much Phillips cared about the Joker being aligned to a canonical version of the story. He wanted Joker to kill Wayne as a kid. Just burn it down and not worry about who the Joker was before his version. Use what he could to sell the concept and then tell his own ideas. Sort of brave, in a way. Would have taken balls to go with that ending.
I watched this movie a few nights ago and I think you have it straight.
While I watched the Nolan trilogy and enjoyed it, as well as enjoying Burton’s earlier version, I don’t typically give a shit about comic books, their canon or the movies that go with many of them these days. So I went into this movie simply expecting something about the Joker. I didn’t read up on it and I’d seen headlines that it was excellent. What I watched was a well done movie about mental illness that hijacked an iconic character from our society for the craven purpose of selling fucking tickets. I thought it was a miserable piece of shit of a story for doing that. Great acting though.
It’s the most nominated movie of 2019 for the Oscars. I’m sure it will win a bunch including best actor. That’s great and all, but this wasn’t about the Joker and this doesn’t even vaguely compare to Ledger’s work. It’s a shame that that comparison is forced upon us since they used the basic premise of the villain to make money. Bleh. I don’t need fucking arthouse stories on the archetype for chaos in our society.
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What in the fuck was RexKramer doing on a regional flight from DC to Newark? Weird. I thought he lived with his parents in DFW somewhere.
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42 minutes ago, michaelpshayes said:
If you were around and of age in 1988 you know what jimmy means to all cowboy fans ... it wasn’t the era of parity or quick turnarounds, Jimmy built that team from the ground up ... soon you figured out you had the best coach in the NFL it was a magic ride
I was 10 or 11 when Jones bought the Cowboys and brought in Johnson. I grew up hating the Cowboys and never saw them win shit, just like the Oilers. Then Johnson did what he did and while I never cheered for them, I couldn’t argue with any of it. Then that fucking idiot fired his wizard and brought in someone that I was rightly trained from birth forward to believe was an imp of satan, and I went right back to hatred. Johnson, given what we’ve seen from dipshit since, was a fucking miracle worker. I’d have loved to have been a Dallas fan during that era.
I didn’t know he wasn’t already in the HOF. Absurd that it took this long.
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3 minutes ago, Jkwellborn said:
I’m gonna predict what happens when this occurs.
Currently, posters bitch about playing the WR eyes/hands but not finding the ball. What happens is a contested completion a lot of time with a tackle coming pretty close, pbu, rare int, or big play/td.
When the DB starts playing the ball, posters will cry when said DB misplays the ball and is also out of position to affect the catch or the wr after he starts running again.
This is Surly. We are gonna bitch either way.I’m sorry, but the playing of the ball by our DBs over the last two years has been embarrassing and the worst anyone alive has seen at Texas in their lifetime. Bitching about DB ball skills this season is pretty much not a Surly poster thing and more of a “yeah, I have eyeballs, this shit is fucking horrible” kind of thing.
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15 minutes ago, Luka Skywalker said:
Questions:
How did Valai fail as a trainer?
Was Valai fired from Georgia?
He failed as a trainer the same way a sandwich shop fails or Borders failed. He didn’t make money and couldn’t retain customers. No one has seen his books. He gave it a go running a business and it didn’t work out. In and of itself, there is no shame in any of that.
He wanted to be put on a path to get an on-field role at Georgia. He was told that wasn’t in the cards and looked elsewhere for something new. There is no source for this. I’m passing this on, but I cannot provide anything public to support it, so that for whatever that is worth to you.
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3 hours ago, Yesh said:
I predict these hires are just good enough to get us to 10-2 and Big12 championship in 2020, but not good enough to prevent us from going 8-4 in 2021.
I’m almost exactly here. I’m actually assuming 2021 is 6-6 in the regular season, at best. Lose to Arkansas on the road, lose 5 Big 12 games, Herman is then able to keep his job because he was 11-3 in 2020 and then we watch Alabama play “name the score” on our ass at home in 2022 and everyone and their mother knows that the end is near. Or, put another way, The Hermancipation is Nigh, perhaps?
3 hours ago, Michael Knight said:i'm trying real hard to maintain patience, let the process finish... but jesus christ its getting harder and harder
I feel almost certain that this is the first post I’ve ever upvoted for you. But yeah. This is brutal to witness.
3 hours ago, ClubWhatever said:Under the category of duh, this process can’t really be like the corporate hiring process in the sense that basically any risk of the hire not working out is unacceptable. In the corporate world you can and do accept more risk because you can hide problem employees or process them out various ways or just outright fire them and replace them at any time. Basically you can hire someone without being 100% sure they can do a good job and not be a cancer. If a coach creates issues during the season or can’t coach like you want, there’s really no non-disruptive recourse, and the impact on the operation is potentially fatal. So for good reason there’s a very strong bias for getting people you absolutely know can coach and get along with you and your other coaches. All that said, I agree that it seems he’s having trouble getting yeses out of some of his more preferred guys.
3 hours ago, Neonmoon said:While technically true, nothing could be further from the truth in the corporate world. It takes an act of Congress to fire someone even if they deserve it.
The closest actual analog to this process is hiring at the early stage for key roles at a start-up. Fuck up any of them and they can be fatal. For sure fucking up more than one can kill you quickly. Way different than corporate. You don’t hire people that give you any doubt, but they don’t have to be your fucking buddies and they are almost always happily employed elsewhere and very successful when you pull them across.
1 hour ago, Mensa's Subconscious said:This post and this username in the context of this thread. Holy fucking shit. Outstanding.
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This is fucking absurd.
I was a peon at a tech start-up in my early/mid-20’s. We were blowing up and growing so fast that it was hard to keep up. I show up one day and one of the higher ranking guys tells me “hey, uh, yeah, that guy over at that desk? yeah, we just hired him. he works for you now. “ and that’s how I became a manager. No training. No say in who reported to me. Just “here you go”.
That guy they had reporting to me? SydneyCarton, for fucks sake. There’s no way they interviewed him. I think he was delivering something to the front desk, asked what was going on there, said he’d be interested in getting a job there and the receptionist hired him on the spot and sent him in to report in a VP’s office.
Herman’s conducting a less sophisticated process than that.
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31 minutes ago, Orange&White said:
Let me guess..CTJ will call him a cunt, pull out his thesaurus and pick out a few new words, drop in some old B or C caliber players name, then act like he’s above the fray despite the fact that he can’t stop himself from responding to negative criticism to degree that make Mack Brown blush. Then he’ll end it with something that he probably chuckled to himself as he typed it.
The bit is as old as Longhorn internet board fandom.
I don’t know why it has taken me this long, but you’re going on ignore. Drone on about me being a meanie with impunity. It’s boring and basically all you do.
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1 hour ago, Harvdog said:
You need some midol. You are constantly pissed about everything. Opinionated and think you are the only one that matters. I don’t think I have ever seen you coaching a game. I don’t think I have ever seen you giving a post game press conference where people actually want to hear what you say. You are an interest chat board narcissist who thinks your opinion is all that matters. I don’t care. I don’t give a flying fuck what you think. You always bitch and complain about everything and think everyone is stupid. Maybe try looking in the Mirror and getting rid of that block on your shoulder. It must be a sad existence to be in the vicinity of you.
Since you are the all-fucking knowing.....who should we have hired 3 years ago as Head Coach? Who should we have hired at DC and OC? I would love to see your “Idea” of what you think would work because I seriously don’t think you know. You would win the lottery and then bitch about having to pay the taxes.
1 hour ago, Harvdog said:And I am shaking in my boots. I don’t give a fuck what he says or thinks. So if this gets you all excited, good for you. I hope it keeps you entertained
Hahahahahaha
Holy shit. Your buttons are so big that it’s almost immoral for me to keep pushing them.
Yes, you do care what I think. If you didn’t, you’d have me on ignore and wouldn’t respond to my bullshit. Here’s a secret: we all care what each other thinks on here. If we didn’t, as @Not a Sock referenced earlier, we’d just follow the official stuff from the school and do other shit until the games are played again. It’s not a virtue to claim that you don’t care what others think. It’s actually a simple lie.
To your other points, you’d enjoy being in my vicinity, people actually like me, and I do bitch about the IRS checks I have to cut. You would also. Oh, and I’m not a coach because I’ve got other shit to do, but coaching isn’t some ethereal act of wizardry that only the finest minds can attempt.
It’s not some secret about who I wanted three years ago. I didn’t want Herman. I’d been around him. He’s a meatheaded narcissist that enjoys hearing himself pontificate about coaching platitudes. I wanted Justin Fuente, and he, like the rest of the coaching world, wasn’t in consideration because they only considered one candidate. Anyway, looking at things these days, it doesn’t look like Fuente would have been demonstrably better or worse than our current fuckface.
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35 minutes ago, Harvdog said:
This! Jinks is a really good coach. He was the guy who started up Cibolo Steele. He was a solid D2 QB at Angelo State. He has ties all over the state of Texas and is well respected. I would run to go get him. He would be a homerun hire for this offense.
i am amazed how many people are trashing the new guy before he’s even stepped foot on campus. Our issue last year was pressure on the QB. We got very little. Why did the secondary look good against Utah? It had more to do with the pass rush and the CB’s not having to cover for longer than 5 seconds. When the QB has all day, any secondary will struggle and we did. I think we will see massive improvement when the pass rush is solid.
I remember in the 2011 NFL draft, every pundit had the Texans taking Prince Akumara because the Texans had a horrible secondary. They chose JJ Watt because they knew the key to good secondary play was a pass rush. I think they got it right because the next year before they were 6-10 and ranked #29 in team defense. The next year they went 10-6 and were ranked #4 in total defense. Their sacks improved and they gave up 1500 less yards. Most of that was in the secondary and the improved pass rush.
The teams that are playing for the Natty on Monday have solid lines with a solid pass rush. That’s the key to our success next year. It all starts in the trenches.
You are surprised that people think hiring a proven loser with one year of on-field experience is a bad hire worthy of criticism? Are just a complete fucking idiot with zero capability for deductive reasoning? Or is your blindness for “the coach is always right” so overpowering that you can’t see anything clearly? It’s laughable idiocy either way to defend the hire. Maybe it works out, but there’s no logical defense for it. You and the other dipshits attempting to do so are just making fools of yourselves. There’s no mystic secret behind the hire. It was meatheaded comfort hire made by proven losers who cannot make even mediocre personnel decisions.
8 minutes ago, RomaVicta said:Yes. The first descriptive word that comes to mind when I read this thread is "caring."
This thread is a mix of keen analysis, petty grudges, name-calling, and generally unfounded hate. Oh, and stupidity, of course. We all contribute to the latter.
It is frustrating wading through the dross to get to the good stuff. Discouraging the shit is actually more "caring about football" than dragging up somebody's errant opinion from five years ago and calling him/her a moron. Discouraging the wormhole discourse that is simply repetition of manic hatred and gloom is similarly "caring."
I wish the whole thread were insufferable so I wouldn't be tempted to open it, but there's enough good to draw me in. Thanks for that, anyway.
Fuck off with the whining. You’re here because you can’t help yourself and you enjoy it. Just be honest about it.
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10 minutes ago, Casual Encounter said:
I think I would make an outstanding running back coach. There’s a shock collar around the nuts approach I’d like to test in the field. I’ll keep them reminded of the importance of ball control.
7 minutes ago, MoJames said:My dad should be the RB coach
Based on everything I’m seeing, both of you guys are qualified as candidates and you should apply. I think Herman may actively be examining resumes coming in on the fax.
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20 hours ago, SwanderedTalent said:
Book idea for 2020: The Maroon Wave (The Coming Dominance of Texas A&M Athletics, Why the 2020s Will Be Known As The Aggie Decade, And Why There's Nothing Anyone Can Do To Stop It)
First I would spend a chapter or two on why A&M has traditionally exceeded expectations despite sabotage by UT, the SWC/Big 12/NCAA and self-imposed burdens like winning World War II and delaying coeducation, and why only the parts of the past that reflect well on A&M matter. So the national titles in 1919, 1927, 1939, and all of the best years in A&M history since (like 1992-93-94 and 2012) are relevant to what will happen in the next ten years, but the rest of it is tainted by things outside A&M's control that no longer exist or that A&M has grown too powerful to be affected by.
Then I would lay the groundwork for my "theory" by talking up Jimbo Fisher, Buzz Williams, and whatever idiot is in charge of A&M baseball, along with any other sports A&M is even moderately competitive in. Like women's basketball, I guess but don't care?
Lastly I would spend the latter half of the book choosing the best current college sports programs regardless of what they have in common with A&M, and then predicting A&M will be the 2020s version of that. Clemson in football, Duke in basketball, etc.
And to really juice things, the last chapter would be an epilogue from April 2, 2030, where a comically perfect tri-sport high school athlete (baseball, basketball and football) is sitting on a lakefront home's front porch, listening to his wise grandfather explain how much has changed for A&M over the past ten years of winning national championships in everything. It will be heavily implied that the athlete can go anywhere in the country and is considering other schools, maybe Texas and Ohio State and Alabama, whatever. But after listening, the athlete says, "Gramps, I know I'll never really understand Texas A&M from the outside, and I know A&M is the pinnacle of athletics. That's where I'm going to college!"
Dumb it down to a fourth-grade reading level and it'll sell a hundred thousand copies easy.
I’ve read a lot of business plans, and I can tell you that this is easily the best one I’ve ever seen. You need to get on this now. Take a sabbatical from your job as a bouncer or corporate scalawag and start punching the keystrokes. There’s a pot of gold for you at the end of this rainbow.
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17 hours ago, LTtxfan said:
Just an fyi... "It should be noted that Brady and Rhule share the same agent (Trace Armstrong), which only adds to the intrigue. Is Armstrong helping make the right connection between Brady and Rhule, or is Armstrong simply ensuring that his client (Brady) will get the best possible deal from LSU?"
Armstrong is also Coach Fuckface’s agent as well at Tim Beck’s. I assume he represents Urban Meyer too, but I don’t know that for sure. Armstrong used percentages after year one as a means of convincing Herman not to fire Beck then. Of course the guy knows how to easily manipulate one of his dumbest clients.
2020 Coaching Staff
in Football
Posted
I like the Hutzler hire without caveat. Looks like a terrific move. I hope he can also recruit well.
Regarding the MENSA stuff, I've always just assumed it was some sort of PR manufactured lie from years gone by that just kind of stuck with him wherever he went. Having met the guy and seen his Hermantics up close, there's no way he's a high IQ guy. Above room temperature? Sure. Above 140? No. I've known two geniuses in my life and, holy shit, you know it when you see it and there is no mistaking it. Known plenty of gifted, high IQ people and frankly, none of them resemble The Hermanitard.