luke duke
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Posts posted by luke duke
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If you've got a "smart" thermostat - or at least one that talk to Apple Homekit - you can use automations to check the temp every so often and set it back to whatever temp is correct. So they'll see the thermostat change to whatever they set it to, and then after they walk away it changes back to whatever you've set it to
I've got honeywell smart thermos that came installed in my house, and the setup with homekit was surprisingly easy
You can also set up a free IFTTT account and get an alert whenever the schedule is manually overridden.
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Company IT department told me I was fired if I didn't ditch the Droid for a company iPhone.
Setting it up now and I'm stuck. I go into the app store and select the app I want. Asks for my login. Is that my regular Apple ID? Because it won't take it.
See if your grandkid can help you. -
the food stand that was a front for a criminal organization.
AKA: The And Stand- 2
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Compensating.
The 80qt gets used for menudo
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We always used to do Christmas Eve at my grandparents, and it was always a traditional Thanksgiving style meal. The youngest kids always had to wait to serve themselves buffet style, and the stuffing, which was magnificent, was always gone by the time I got there. It was always my older cousins who would just hog it all. And they'd just laugh at us youngsters. Pissed me off to no end.
Your grandmother didn’t like you.- 1
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Damn! I just added an inexpensive 12 qt stock pot, and was thinking I was King Shit of Turd mountain. But you sir, are the Dear Leader of this shit.
I’ve got an 80qt pot too.- 1
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Yes. One must be batshit stupid to fuck up mashed potatoes.
My MIL made boxed mashed potatoes for Thanksgiving a few years ago. I’ve done them ever since.- 2
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Every event we have I wash all the dishes as we go. We both share cooking duties. My wife makes a crazy mess when she cooks, I do not. But then she feels guilty and tries to "help".
Narrator: It isn't helpful
While I'm washing things in the sink, she likes to start loading everything on top of what I'm washing, or in a way I can't wash something. Mind you I've cleared the sink out and all the dirty stuff is clearly piled up next to it.
I've asked her about 10000 times to just walk away and let me do it. She does for 2 or 3 minutes, then is back at it. It's literally the least helpful she possibly could be during that time. Yet she still can't help herself. Every. Single. Time. But I'M the asshole for snapping at her for not listening.
You should just walk away at that point and let her finish.- 1
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Mashed potato/dressing pancake, fried egg and gravy.
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24qt pot. Going to have lots of stock.
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MIL: I don’t watch professional football. There’s too much kneeling and other woke shit going on.
Me: When was the last time you watched a game?
MIL: When the Oilers left Houston.
She’s never intentionally watched a game in her life. I didn’t know Colin Kaepernick was a time traveler.- 2
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FIL still has a tendency to get irrationally angry about politics and interject it out of nowhere thanks to his buddies sending him YouTube conspiracy theorist videos.
Login to his router and block YouTube- 1
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Nachos with a side of enchilada.
Naoch! -
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https://www.etsy.com/listing/801831110/dog-poop-soap-choose-your-scent-funny
https://www.etsy.com/listing/1088477780/the-original-shartkit-the-best-gag-gift
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MCQIYHE/ -
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I’m in Houston all week for a conference. Would any of you guys who live near the Galleria mind if I swing by your place every morning this week and take a shit?
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Man....dogs are f'n awesome.
Also, a few years back, we visited a Scottish sheep farm near Selkirk (friends of my parents - at the time, the boy was super into sheep and loved lambs and such) in the very early spring. I grew up in SETX, and am a duck hunter. And holy shit, I've never seen mud like that in my life. Wellington boots are a way of life there for a reason.
I didn’t know your boy was aggy.- 1
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I think the NYT headline has been surpassed
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Leaving kids overnight
in Lulz
Posted
How old were your kids the first time you let them stay at the house overnight by themselves? Are your kids dipshits or responsible?