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Hairy Biped

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Everything posted by Hairy Biped

  1. Just noticed that they put the goal posts back in.
  2. I grew up in a rural neighborhood outside of a small town. The neighborhood was pretty much the most upscale one in town, with lots or doctors, lawyers, business owners, etc. living there. When I was probably about 10 or so, we had a small group of about 8 to 12 of us who would pretend we were a gang and we would roam the streets nearly every night during the Summer, and just do dumb shit. Almost everybody had a treehouse, so we'd camp out in our treehouses all of the time, so our parents didn't know that we were out wandering around. One night we got this brilliant idea that we would spread out across the hood, find any unlocked car doors, and at a certain time, all honk the horns until lights came on in the house, then run away. Anyway, we synchronized our watches, paired off, split up and went around looking for unlocked cars. Me and my buddy chose the house across the street from his, occupied by one of the most prominent families in town, a 3rd generation doctor. They lived in a huge Colonial style house set on a hill right in the middle of the neighborhood, and he had an old Ford Model A that he would drive in parades and such. Anyway, when the time came, we start hearing horns all over the place, but we couldn't find the button for the horn on the Model A, so we just start flipping switches and pushing buttons until we hear the loudest fucking "AHHHH OOOOO GAAAAAAAAA" ever. The button got stuck and it kept going off. We tried to make it stop, but said fuck it and bailed out when the house lights came on. We ran all of the way across the neighborhood and could still hear the AHHH OOOOOO GAAAAA loud as hell for several minutes. Another night we found out that one of the guys stole something from another, so we decided to put him on trial. His brother tried to defend him, but he was holding the evidence when he got caught, so it didn't take much to convict. I was the judge, so I decided to sentence him to 3 jolts in the electric chair, which was just a metal folding chair connected to the sparkplug wire on my go kart. He agreed so long as we would let him go after and everyone would be cool about it. So we used a belt to crudely strap him to the chair and I gave it a good pull. He freaked the fuck out and jumped up and ran off still strapped to the chair screaming. I guess it hurt.
  3. Fuck! Every single cop involved in that stop should spend the rest of their lives in prisons receiving daily anal searches themselves. How can we call ourselves a civilized society if we allow our public servants to treat our neighbors like that? Those fucksticks were pissed that they couldn't something to pin on the "black folks", so they decided to take it out on one of them the hard way. Fucking disgusting.
  4. They've also put down giant strips of duct tape along the West side and South end zone.
  5. Win or lose? Fuck that, we're gonna win tonight. And the next 2 too! Hook 'Em!!!
  6. I guess I have no idea what you're talking about then. Unless it the shot-gunning a beer post that was here earlier. If so, then you might need to lighten up a touch. Intense game with everything on the line. You've gotta expect some venom.
  7. Bro, if you're going to twitter to look for classy folks then you're doing it wrong.
  8. Great win! Now go get another one tomorrow and let's try not to make things so interesting at the end.
  9. What the fuck? Why do we always have to fuck around. That should have been an easy out. Shit!
  10. It-doesn't-matter-we're-gonna-kick-their-asses-thirty.
  11. Fucking UVA had a baserunner every inning and only scored 2 runs, coming on one hit. That's impressive. But we don't need to allow Miss St baserunners every inning. That was fucking frustrating and put way more pressure on our pitching, defense and my 50 year old heart than was necessary. I hope the Texas bats sleep well tonight and show up at the park ready to make lots of noise.
  12. That'll get you beat almost every time. Meanwhile, we shit our pants pretty much every at bat.
  13. This game is a cruel bitch, and the bigger the game, the crueler it gets. I fucking hate it and love it at the same time.
  14. That was a shitty at bat with RISP. Gotta be a lot better than that.
  15. Beating UVA won't mean shit if we don't get the bats going. These at bats ain't gonna do shit against Miss St.
  16. A little bit shaky that inning for Pete, but he got thru it. We need some fucking hits now.
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