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Everything posted by closetojumping
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Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
closetojumping replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
I’m going to be surprised if they’re able to get anything done beyond a Pierce-level hire. They don’t have the money to just go nuts or they’d be spending differently across the board already. The environment there is toxic. They’re surrounded, like in every other sport, by powers in the sport with better history, better backgrounds and locations and more resources. Anyone going there is making a pure money grab. Vaughn would be a fool to do it. O’Connor? Sure, take the money. Sullivan and Vitello? LOL. The one guy they could get that I would have no interest in seeing at ATM is Canham. So I’m sure they’ll not even contact him. -
A pox upon your house, sir!
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People hate his voice, but he’s one the best color guys and personalities in college football.
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Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
closetojumping replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
Sure, why not? I don’t have the roster in front of me so someone else will have to help. OL: Zuhn; any others are fantasy but that wouldn’t stop The Elk TB: Moss, if he’s recovered and has a good year; He might be thinking that the NFL is really stupid and would draft Daniels or Owens WR: Concepcion would have to have a big year and show something special. Not buying anyone else. TE: The Swede in Elko’s fantasies. Don’t see it. QB: No. DT: Regis with a big year? Hicks out of nowhere? Edge: Howell? No. LB: Scooby Doo? No. York? lol. NB: … CB: Ricks? Hahaha. Chappell? Is this 2023? S: Bryce Anderson has gone backwards. Not seeing it. I count like 4-5, I guess? Not really seeing someone early. I don’t know, maybe I’m forgetting someone obvious. -
I have met some downright scary people from longhorn netdom over the decades. People I wouldn't let my children come within 50 yards of, and yet, in reading this, I'm reminded that some of the scariest motherfuckers around this place might be my friends. Bring that imagery into another thread, sir, and I'll view it as a declaration of war.
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No. Do you believe everything you read on the Internet, doofus? If we went through all of the things I've been accused/described as or been accused/described as having, I'd be the weirdest and fastest alien chimeric Greg Davis imaginable.
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Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
closetojumping replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
That shit is fucking hilarious. They couldn't be more wrong about several of their talking points if they tried. 1) NIL and LHF donors are dying off and mostly olds. - The olds in the donor base do not, generally, have any interest in helping with NIL. The reality is that the largest donors to NIL are all under the age of 50. The absolute idiocy in their take otherwise is only matched by their bizarre certitude. 2) Asians don't like sports. - Never mind the stereotyping trending towards abject racism and just consider any single poster's own experiences in life on this one. Some of the most fanatical "fans" I've been around have been people of Asian ethnicity. Little league, hs football, Texas sports, whatever. Just a dumb, ignorant POV. 3) Tito Beveridge, that rat bastard, is giving Texas anything they want for NIL. - We've been through this and the complete fallacy of it. As we predicted, it's now fact. I take comfort in seeing their inability to understand circumstances as they are and willful ignorance towards anything that paints Texas as having a sustainable advantage on any front. That stuff has always been their problem and access to constant flows of clear information has done nothing to change it. -
Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
closetojumping replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
History repeating itself just meaning a highly intelligent head coach of a rival/semi-rival hating his mouthbreathing alumni base and seeing his previously middling drinking problems explode into Denzel Washington from Flight levels of alcoholism. -
@BurntOrange&White
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It's actually really hilarious to see. Tramel has obfuscated on behalf of personalities he's covered for decades. The guy has ridden more dicks than Bonnie Blue. He's not an intelligent guy and clearly he can't judge character to save his life. Watching him attempt to play the victim now is awesome.
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Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread
closetojumping replied to texifornia's topic in 🤫$9.95🤫
When Mike Leach was at Tech, he used to get just absolutely shithoused. Totally torn up. Then he’d get out of his car and walk into whatever west Texas booster gathering he was required to go gladhand at and then go on a heater with outrageous claims about the future of the program. After being found on the roadside, passed out and then driven home by a Tech friendly cop, Texas Tech’s AD then assigned a permanent driver for Leach when heading out to such functions. The rumors have persisted that The Elk is ripping through 3/4s of a handle on a normal day, and he doesn’t like the glad handing and thinks he’s above it. So I can see history repeating itself here: That’s a given. That’s a given. -
Doering and the chick who went to SCar (name is escaping me for a second) were doing it on SEC This Morning as well. Mississippi did it that one time, and some idiot after the game claimed that he loved Earley more than life its own self, so now ATM walks through the SEC tournament and then rips through to the CWS and a national title. It’s only been 12+ years for the SEC honks with ATM. I guess at some point down the line these idiots will take a minute and realize that they’re playing Charlie Brown to ATM’s Lucy with the football.
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Texas Baseball 2025 - Your SEC regular season champions!!
closetojumping replied to petscii's topic in Baseball
Would Gasparino leaving be something that caused a ton of consternation at this point? I’d rather see him stay, but if he wanted to take his three true outcomes on the road, I would lose sleep about it. -
What a spineless position. This poor media member should be absolved of adult accountability and those meanie investors are evil people for holding the adults who signed contracts to the legal standard. Right. Did you sob while typing your post?
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Maybe Curtis Ewers can cover Tramel’s portion as repayment for all of the water he carried for the Ewers camp during the past 4 years.
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Have you not been to a little league or pre-teen select baseball game in the last 5 years, sir? At least one kid’s walk-up song is a Tiesto song. If you don’t want to get down to business, that’s a personal problem.
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Is there a Bennigan's still in existence? I don't remember their honey mustard, but I remember their Monte Cristo being awesome. The great thing about that place was that they were open until 2am. We'd finish a shift across I-35 and then they were just a u-turn underneath the freeway away.
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OU Football 2025 - Brent Venables Masturbates On Live TV
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in Football
Spoilered below is a sad, yet revealing, article from Sooners Illustrated regarding their highest ranking transfers according to internal need. Highlights: -The Mercer QB they found in the dustbin is #5. -OU added 21 players from the portal and lost 37. The last PK available is their 2nd most important transfer. -They really need Jadyn Ott to be back to his 2023 self. -
Rep points? Such things pale in comparison to the opportunity to yet again take your pseudointellectual musings to the woodshed. Also, I do not have a nasal wheeze.
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I'm not cheering for him or anyone to kick the bucket, but I would like to spit on his grave after it happens. He's a true piece of shit in the longhorn realm.
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You and @SydneyCarton are both clownish with the bystander effect shit. Genovese was murdered in a laundromat surrounded by apartments in NYC at like 2am. Some witnesses, none visual, heard her off and on screams for over an hour as the knife-wielding murderous rapist kept leaving and coming back once no one showed up. Witnesses later confessed that they either thought it was a couple doing consensual stuff or they thought police had already rendered aid. It didn't help that things were dimly lit and no one could see anything. The original story grossly exaggerated the behavior and count of witnesses. It's more of a canard to actually call that out as an example of bystander effect than anything. Cialdini's "Influence" goes into great detail about that murder and many other psychological/social phenomena and stories associated to them. Great read for anyone. Also, the "bridge" reference by SC is likely overlaying memories about bystander effect stories with public suicides off of bridges in front of onlookers who just watch it happen. That's actually a real example.
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OU Football 2025 - Brent Venables Masturbates On Live TV
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in Football
Michigan returns 7 of 11 starters on defense and gets Rod Moore back at Safety. They also picked up TJ Metcalf in the portal from Arkansas. They will have a good, experienced defense from day 1. Offensively, they return 4 of 5 on the OL, all of the WRs (if that's a good thing?), Bredeson at H-back and they picked up Justice Haynes in the portal from Bama. This will not be the same shitty offense for Michigan from 2024, even if they're not worldbeaters early. The OL's maturity, as opposed to last season, will be a big deal early. Michigan is a substantially more talented team that OU, even if the QB will be greener than Augusta to open the season. I started out arguing with the sooner regulars on the OU recruiting thread that this team would go 8-4/9-3. They staunchly disagreed. After the portal closed and I really started looking at it, yeah, 8-4 would be an insane outcome. They have a shitty roster, shitty coaching staff, shitty S&C program and a brutal schedule. I'll post more of my thoughts on each in their own posts akin to the first one on this thread. -
OU Football 2025 - Brent Venables Masturbates On Live TV
closetojumping replied to closetojumping's topic in Football
There's nothing in the original post about "eating cock" or "guzzling jizz". That's coming from your own head space and the rest of us didn't need to be subjected to elements of your fantasies. -
Due to the bizarre meta nature of topic discussions on this board, discussing OU for the 2025 football season, like those before it, has become a bizarre exercise in either posting on the OU recruiting thread or the football board "Tell me about OU" thread, neither of which actually wind up satisfying the purpose of staying updated on the team. This is a similar phenomenon for every other team any of us would give a shit about besides Texas itself. Given that, I decided to start a new thread for the express purpose of tracking 2025 itself for OU. I'll post my preseason thoughts here, and then I, and hopefully others, can provide updates towards and into the season when there's something new regarding the OU team. Will I be the only person tracking this thread and wind up posting to myself in an echo chamber? Wouldn't be the first time. Still, it's our arch rival and I get tired of trying parse signal from noise in other threads when it comes to their team. In regard to their outlook for 2025 as of 5/20/25, here are my thoughts, offense first: Offense: QB: QB1 John Mateer (JR); QB2 Michael Hawkins (Soph) - Outside of QB1 and QB2, they have a true freshman that they absolutely cannot play, so they brought in a dude from ... Mercer at the last minute. They are really thin here. Luckily, Michigan and the SEC aren't known for playing big, angry defenses that can hurt QBs. Mateer can kick the shit out of some midgets, stacking big numbers against terrible defenses. Wazzou ranked 100th in the strength of defenses faced metric. He struggled against Tech and UW and tends to have brain fart games passing where he struggles to complete 50% of his passes. OU thinks he's the next Baker Mayfield, even with idiots in their media pool hinting at that notion. When has OU ever created undue hype for a newcomer, though? We all watched Hawkins take a heaving dump on the field multiple times last year. If he's "the future", as Kirk Herbstreit and guys like Chris Plank have argued, the future looks like something requiring the help of an adult John Connor. RB: RB1 Jadyn Ott (SR); RB2 Javontae Barnes (SR); Taylor Tatum (Soph) - In a dominating theme for the Venables OU regime, OU lost a 5 star, this time at RB, that they'd failed to really develop - Gavin Sawchuk. That dude is now at FSU where I assume Pete Thamel will, on Gameday just before the FSU opener against Bama, breathlessly claim that he's quietly being viewed as the next 1st round RB draft pick by "many NFL scouts off the record". I digressed, maybe. Anyway, Ott was lured into the portal by Jim Nagy without even discussing matters with RB Coach Demarco Murray or, allegedly, Brent Venables himself. They immediately declared him RB1 while ignoring the fact that he's not on campus yet. That should say a lot to Barnes, who must agree since he decided to stay put. Ott took a lot of bullets for Cal in 2023 while putting up just over 1300 yards at 5.3ypc. He got hurt early in 2024 and when he came back, didn't look like his former self, averaging just 3.3ypc on the season. Dude has caught 49 passes over the past 2 years and can be a weapon out of the backfield, should the OC actually decide to use RBs in the passing game. If the guy is 2023 Ott, OU got a good one. If he's still broken down, and with Jerry Schmidt conditioning and Venables' penchant for violent practices, this is where I lean, then OU blew good money on a broken mule. Barnes is another classic Venables okie player. He's actively failing as a former 5 star who is also a talented midget-puncher. The guy rushed for almost 600 yards last year with 5 tds on the ground at 4.7ypc. Not bad for a 2nd string RB, you might say. Well, more than 1/3 of the yards production came against Maine. That game also accounted for 11.3ypc and 60% of the guys rushing TDs. He was a nonentity against quality opponents, including Texas. Keep an eye on Taylor Tatum, as he may well be another OU 5 star bust. "The top rated running back recruit in the nation" was stated repeatedly by announcers every time he'd enter the game. He beat the shit out of ... Temple when he got carries in game 1. He became irrelevant not long after that game. He didn't pass block, he can't catch, and he has bigger fumbling problems than Jaydon Blue (4 fumbles/3 lost fumbles in 61 total touches). He remains buried on the depth chart. He also had concussion issues in 2024, so that's something to monitor this year as well. TE: TE1 Will Huggins (SR); TE2 Carson Kent (JR); TE3 Kaden Helms (JR); TE4 Jaren Kanak (SR) - OU can't figure out the TE position and hasn't had one worth a shit since the Riley era. They lost their most productive receiver and starting TE, Bauer Sharp, to LSU in the portal. That sounds worse than it is, because that guy sucked and couldn't block a soul. Venables followed the Tom Herman "I'm clueless on personnel management" model and decided that he'd just throw bodies at the problem, irrespective of whether those bodies could even fog a mirror. OU has 7! TEs on the roster in an offense that targeted the TE last year at Washington State less than 30 times on the season. Huggins is a giant human at 6'6", 265. He's a transfer from the legendary Pittsburg State (Kansas), home of Dennis "Little Debbie" Franchione. The OU talkers project this guy as a starter who will largely be used in blocking. Carson Kent is from Smallville, Kansas and, much like Craig Christ, will forever be overshadowed by his far more famous older brother. Outside of that, he's a transfer from the revered power, Kennesaw State, and had 18 catches for that juggernaut. The third guy might as well be named Bob. Fun note on Jaren Kanak is that this is his lost stop on his own failure tour, signing with Venables' first class as a highly rated 4 star LB who OU honks were immediately proclaiming to be the next great OU Linebacker. Strong work. Here's a hagiographic article at the time of Kanak's arrival to OU where Venables and the Kanak's go absurdly out of their way to claim that Venables didn't just swipe Kanak from the Clemson class as he left town. They do everything but sob and swear on a stack of bibles. WR-X: WR1 Zion Kearney (Soph); WR2 Ivan Carreon (Soph); WR3 Josiah Martin; WR1A Javonnie Gibson - Sooner talking heads began hyping UAPB transfer Gibson almost as soon as he stepped on campus. He's a FSC All American and put up big numbers last season with elite speed. Then Venables had his leg broken in half during a full contact scrimmage during the spring period and he may not be ready to play, if at all, until mid-2025. So then they're left with Bob Kearney, Ted Carreon and Tom Martin. 3 JAGgers who have never jagged harder than they are jagging right now. Actually, Martin is a transfer from Cal and flashed as a Freshman there last year, so maybe he sneaks up as the next guy sooners can fellate at WR in public. WR-Z: WR1 Keontez Lewis (SR); WR2 Zion Ragins (Soph); WR3 Elijah "The Prophet" Thomas (FR); WR4 Jer'Michael Carter (Soph); WR1A Jayden Gibson (JR) - The sooners would desperately like to have the 2023 version of Jayden Gibson back on their roster for 2025. Unfortunately for OU, 2024 Gibson was punished for being yet another guy named "Jayden" and God provided for him to have a triad blowout in one of his knees accordingly. The dude wasn't available in the spring and many of the talking heads and insiders at OU are conceding that he may never play again after he blew the same knee out again in prep for the 2025 season, allegedly. Lewis is from Southern Illinois and his numbers there were solid in FCS, but he couldn't find the field in prior stops at Wisconsin and UCLA. Ragins also looked like a FCS player last season. Thomas is being hailed as "special", which is a word that okies use when referring to people in a different manner than the rest of us. Carter is from McNeese State, hasn't gotten to campus yet, and they're projecting him to leapfrog everyone and be the starter after arrival. There are numerous dogshit positions on the OU roster, but this one might be worse than any besides TE. WR-Y: WR1 Deion Burks (SR); WR2 Isaiah Sategna (JR); WR3 Jordan Jacob (Soph) - Burks was heralded last offseason and going into the year as The Next Great OU Wide Receiver. He then caught 3 tds against Temple and the OU media shit itself in glee over this rare find from Purdue. Then the guy averaged fewer than 8ypc, never scored another td, suffered a lower leg injury and basically quit on the team. They begged him back on the field later in the season, he promptly got a concussion and never played again. Nagy showed up and moneywhipped this mediocrity to stay. He returns this cycle as a starter and the honking about his skills has freshly started again. Sategna was a similar player to Burks, only at Arkansas last year. For an alleged "burner", the guy averaged 13.3ypc and scored 1 touchdown all season. Jacob is another guy who showed up reeking of mediocrity and averaged fewer than 9ypc in mop up duty. Overall, the OU WR and TE rooms are as low quality as anyone will find in the SEC. I'm not saying there might not be 1 or 2 on the same level of putrid, but none of the ones that I've looked at so far fit that description. Vandy has an early draft pick at TE in Stowers. Texas? Right. Bama? Georgia? Florida? ATM even has Conception and Craver. Someone should go down the list of the other schools and see if there's one in which they'd prefer OU as the option. A live look-in at Venables examining his WR and TE rooms: LT: LT1 Logan Howland (Soph); LT2 Jacob Sexton (SR); LT3 Michael Fasusi (FR) - Sexton started off 2024 as the starter at LT for OU, then was so putrid that they moved him to LG following the Temple start. He stayed at LG until injury forced him back to LT before falling to injury himself, forcing the okies to start Howland the last 5 games. The one thing that can be said about Howland is that he's not Jacob Sexton. Bill Bedenbaugh has a reputation both as a probable pederast and terrific developer of OL talent. Consensus former 4 star Jacob Sexton questions that second thought. Fasusi allegedly "flashed" in the spring, yet OU commentators stated that, should Fasusi have to play early, they're in trouble. Also, Howland missed the spring after getting labrum surgery. No worries there, as the shoulder isn't important at all when it comes to quality OL technique and physicality. LG: LG1 Heath Ozaeta (Soph); LG2 Daniel Akinkunmi (Soph); LG3 Sean Hutton (FR) - Ozaeta became the starter for 8 games last year as the OU OL was decimated with injuries. He was not good (456th ranked G out of 639 OGs nationally per PFF) during that period and helped OU lead the FBS in sacks allowed, with 50 total. He missed the spring for labrum surgery as well, but is still projected as the starter. I will not pretend to know anything about the OU LG backup guards. C : C1 Troy Everett (SR); C2 Jake Maikkula (SR); C3 Owen Hollenbeck (FR) - Everett started the last half+ of the season last year at C and was functional (95th rated C out of 301 graded nationally). They're happy to have him back. Maikkula was a starter at Stanford who transferred this spring and he was terrible last year (232nd out of 301). Of all of the OL positions, C sadly looks best for OU from my perspective. RG: RG1 Fibechi Nwaiwu (SR); RG2 Eddy Pierre-Louis (FR); RG3 Ryan Fodje (FR) - Nwaiwu is the OU media's favorite OL for some reason (dude graded at 401 out of 639 OGs). I don't get it. The guy was a penalty machine and he made numerous errors in assignment throughout the season. He's back for more false starts and buffoonery in the running game. The only thing I know about the back-ups are that Pierre-Louis probably is fluent in French or Creole and Fodje was highly rated. RT: RT1 Derek Simmons (SR); RT2 Jake Taylor (JR); RT3 Luke Baklenko (JR) - Simmons is a transfer from Western Carolina. The guy showed up and immediately beat out Jake Taylor, mostly due to Taylor's knees being shot due to years of hard drinking and playing catcher. Baklenko has links to the Russian mob and is a transferring starter from Stanford. The guy had PFF grades in the low 50's as a starting T at Stanford and was allegedly pushed out of the program after being caught trying to extort the towel boy for protection in the locker room from Troy Taylor and the kickers. Not even OU honks are bullish on this position. What every Sooner OL sees in their nightmares and skull sessions: Offensive Coaching: Venables pushed Joe Jon Finley back to just TE and meth cooking duties, where he belongs. He then went and hired a package deal from Wazzou in QB John Mateer and OC Fatty Arbuckle. The combo hit it off at WSU, putting up big passing numbers and Mateer being a terrific running QB as part of the package. Arbuckle's offense isn't much for throwing to the TEs or backs, focusing on the QB:WR relationships. OU writers view Mateer as the steal of the portal this cycle and the program is betting on the duo offensively for survival. I expect Arbuckle to treat Venables's program like an aspiring actress, raping it for pleasure and then leaving it for dead. Michigan and the SEC won't hit as weakly as SJSU, Oregon State, Portland State, and the bevy of other trash that these idiots abused last season at Washington State. Arbuckle is 29. He put together a terrific offense at WKU in 2022 and parlayed that into the Wazzou gig in 2023. He coached Cam Ward and compiled another good season of stats. WSU started off on fire on offense and went 4-0. Once deeper into league play against quality defense, they proceeded to go 1-7, with the lone win being against a hapless CU late in November. The guy doesn't run straight Air Raid, RPO or West Coast, but rather steals from all 3 concepts and throws deep a lot. WSU last was aggressive with their use of planned run plays for Mateer. If Fatty uses Mateer like this against the OU 2025 schedule, Mateer's health could be in question by Red River. I'll add some posts from their writers on the offensive side below. I'll add defense, special teams and schedule thoughts later. Anyone seeing news about OU's roster or prospects for 2025 in football, feel free to pile on here, or add your own thoughts as well.
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a) the salsa at Chili’s is ass. wouldn’t make a top 500 salsa list for me. b) the trope that Chili’s makes good queso needs to go straight to hell. circumstances beyond my control had me at a Chili’s recently (select ball in the burbs) and we tried it again and it still sucks. my 11YO liked it though. c) i, along with @SydneyCartonand @RGBIII, have seen you defile both a queso and a salsa, sir. you cannot speak on this subject matter with authority.
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