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Posts posted by closetojumping
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35 minutes ago, texifornia said:
To make @Coelenterate Fuccboi's point crystal clear, Quay has a kid, multiple downward-trending decommitments, and attends a school that pulls from some pretty downtrodden neighborhoods.
Put the pieces together.
Honestly, as a data point, the only one that matters is the string of decommitments. There just aren’t a lot of guys out there who have committed to more than two places during their recruitments that turned out to much at all. It’s some sort of personality flag that they’re monumental fuck-ups not worth pursuing. You got to kiss a lot of those frogs to find a prince, it appears.
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10 hours ago, closetohumping said:
MSFHorn used to be pretty connected. Haven’t seen posts from him in a long time, but it’s worth noting. He’d know shit that the $9.95ers wouldn’t from the booster side, provided there is something there to know.
8 hours ago, Teryor said:Nahlin's an asshole for waiting till after the game to say that it isn't Golding
8 hours ago, Newy25 said:
You assume he knows anything. Recent data points suggest most are on the dark now.Yep. The Golding thing was bullshit the whole way, as some of us suspected and posted about all along. It was just this dipshit trying create a scenario of correlation that wasn’t there.
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@FloridaHorn Any big updates making a splash just ahead of the game starting? We're on pins and needles here, sir.
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I’m stunned, I’m pissed, it’s Gene Chizik?
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12 minutes ago, satyanash said:
Even if Coleman won't be used as a recruiter, his WR group was nothing special this year. Couldn't beat press coverage on the outside.
Bringing him back is not the recipe for replicating Alabama's WR attack.
You quoted me as though I’ve offered a value judgment on keeping Coleman. I didn’t. I’ve offered ways in which he could still be on staff that aren’t just “he’s the on-field coach.” I don’t know whether keeping him in any capacity is good or bad. I lean towards “next man up” and showing him the door, but that wasn’t in my post.
In reality, I have a hard time forming an opinion on Coleman because:
a) Tom Herman’s predictable and shitty offense limits any particular group’s effectiveness and
b) Whatever anyone thinks of Sam Ehlinger, he was never accurate with throwing to the outside or deep, and this year he sucked shit through a straw at both. I don’t care about why that happened, it simply did happen.
So maybe Coleman sucks, maybe he doesn’t. I won’t be excited if he’s retained in his current capacity, but will be mostly pleased if he’s used off the recruiting trail as an extra coach.
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1 minute ago, FloridaHorn said:
Not cross at all, just stating opinions and scattershooting like 99.9% of the rest of the board. You act as if Texas is above making dumb fucking moves, yet I present the last decade plus as evidence to the contrary. Whether or not new coaches are announced before the game remains to be seen, as does the intelligence of said moves...However, those two things are not mutually exclusive when it comes to the Horns and their decision makers. I simply stated that it would not surprise me in the least if there is news on the coaching staff just prior to the game. The only confirmed hires at this point is Gideon, Drayton, Davis, Joseph and Coleman (in some capacity), it is not far fetched to think that someone leaks Flood or Wiggins, or even Golding tonight.
Ha. I admitted to the stupidity of Texas and its penchant for such behaviors, so I'm not "acting as if" anything can't happen. The "cross" line was a joke that some picked up.
We should place a bet though. I think this is a hill you and I should die on, for sure. We could do avatar replacements, money, board banishments forever, some other digital feat of stupidity or instability, you name it.
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2 minutes ago, FloridaHorn said:
Unpossible….this is unadulterated fantasy speak...CTJ told me so.
Why FloridaHorn, are we cross? What an ugly tone. I tell you what, we should have a bet on it. You can take the position that Texas will release the assistant coaching list right before gametime of the college football national title game to "make the biggest splash" and I'll take the position that that reads like fantasy and will not happen. Let's bet something on it.
Also, that's the dumbest fucking PR move ever if they actually do that. Tomorrow would be a great day to do that shit. Tonight is terrible timing and just stupid. So, hey, maybe it does happen since Texas always does stupid shit like that.
Also also, remember that time right before the Bama/ND semifinal in which they announced Sarkisian to Texas in order to "make the biggest splash?" Yeah, me neither.
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6 minutes ago, dcar00 said:
I didn't think Carrington was an analyst and as director of recruiting he could talk to recruits but not do visits unless he is a coach.
I'm just asking about what the rules are not whether you can bend or break them.
We are bookends on the subject matter. I don't know or care about the rules, only how the roles are functioning in the real world environment. So I have no clue on the do's and don't's, just the are's and aren't's and one of the aren't's is a hands off approach for the analysts within these programs, particularly Bama's.
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4 minutes ago, JBJ said:
Nor can they contact recruits.
Do you think Brian Carrington is communicating with recruits via smoke signal? Seriously guys, come the fuck on.
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2 minutes ago, dcar00 said:
analysts can coach practice and during games? I thought they couldn't coach on the field at all.
They coach in practice 100% of the time. I am fairly certain that's also the case at Texas. It is for sure at Bama. You can go and find easy footage of Chuckles, Applewhite, and Stoops on the sidelines, this year, at Bama games. They're not there as spectators.
Does that fit into NCAA guidelines? Maybe, maybe not. Doesn't matter, as that is how it works. Sarkisian isn't going to witness that at Bama and go somewhere else not do exactly that.
This is a level 1 source for me regarding how Bama handles assistants. It is a person in the inner circle, attending their games, and talking to me directly, as we've been friends for decades.
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2 hours ago, RGBIII said:Nahlin said expect Carrington back
Wow, this one is really enlightening. Right.
There seem to be a group of staff members that were correctly assessed when Gerry first released the list of guys coming with Sark: Flood, Milwee, Davis; some that would stay: Drayton, Carrington (if BC wasn't part of the list, it was disclosed through channels almost immediately that he'd be sticking from the same kind of source); and then some that were kiboshed but correct in original plan: Muschamp (kiboshed by Muschamp), Stoops (by BMD, thankfully), Banks (Saban wants to keep him, so he either sticks or doesn't announce a departure that can be confirmed until after tonight); and then some spitballing from whoever provided the info, such as Colbert and Lupoi. That source actually looks like it had its shit together.
Since then, everything from the $9.95 side of things has been chasing hypotheses and I see nothing new today in that vein. Wiggins, Simmons, Raymond, Freeman, Arnett, Odom, Huff, Scott, Golding, Quinn, etc., all looking like dry wells or lucky guesses.
Then you have Gideon happening without prior commentary on him. Next is Joseph coming out of nowhere. Now you have Coleman as "being with the WRs" but we don't know in what capacity. I think we're at the point where the $9.95ers don't have anything worth mentioning beyond the original material, so it's everyone's best guess. Guys like Nahlin acting like they know jack shit about the DC are playing charades.
I'm guessing there is a huge flurry of official announcements tomorrow morning before Sarkisian's PC. If not then, surely immediately afterward.
One note regarding Coleman: Bama uses analysts as assistants in all facets except being able to put them on the road recruiting. Those dudes coach practice, during the games, do evaluations, contact recruits and take calls/texts with them, etc. Texas is paying Coleman his on-field assistant salary no matter what. Sarkisian likes him as a coach. This could very easily be a situation in which Coleman gets to get paid and coach the way he wants while not having to go on the road and recruit, which he doesn't like. So that frees up a spot to bring on a partner who likes to do the recruiting and will be happy to split the coaching work and get paid. Maybe not, but that's actually the idea I like best at this point, and it makes more sense than anything else I've heard, so I'll go with that over $9.95 speculative stuff to the contrary.
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28 minutes ago, Thiefery said:
So odds on favorite this Monday morning is Golding still?
24 minutes ago, Fud said:Golding is 100% tea leaf reading, so I guess it depends on how much stock you put into that
This is absolutely correct. Might it be Golding? Ok, sure. That is conjured from the minds of $9.95ers either way. They’re deductive and know the space, so they might get it right. I do not believe for a second that any of them know with any level of confidence or depth.
A simple test on things like this is how much chirping and rechirping they’re all doing, to the point where it becomes crowing. We’ve watched it for years, you know how it works.
When I read or hear “it’s gotta be, doesn’t it?” followed by a bunch of circumstantial reasoning, I’m immediately dubious. That’s the case here.
6 minutes ago, FloridaHorn said:I told my son the same thing yesterday. Sark and CDC have done a great job controlling the narrative to this point. Why not drop a couple of names just prior to game time for some free publicity and to get a few key recruits attention?
No one is going to give one shit about a DC rumor at Texas just before a CFBNT game between two big, undefeated brands. That’s fantasy.
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2 minutes ago, Sir Ulrich said:
Assuming it is Golding would yall rather have:
Golding DC/LB- Raymond CB- Joseph Safeties
Golding DC/LB- Scott CB- Joseph Safeties
Golding DC/CB- Lupoi DC/LB- Joseph Safeties
Why do I have to assume this?
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Can we not fix this fucking title and have some color and fun on this board? Christ.
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18 minutes ago, Dbeasy said:
I look forward to a DC being named that has been on no 9.95r or surly list.
This is my expectation and I’m going to be disappointed if it turns out otherwise.
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58 minutes ago, Message Board User said:
There's always a SydneyCarton.
This may be my favorite line for 2021 so far.
25 minutes ago, Vertigo said:So Sydney is an aggy bag man? How am I not surprised.
6 minutes ago, SydneyCarton said:You are such a cock gobbler, CTJ.
fun fact everyone, he is in fact joking.
It is honestly pathetic how much entertainment I derived from this.
Can you shed light on who is the culprit though?
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7 minutes ago, Chuckie Finster said:You don’t go from offering the OU WR coach $1MM to keeping Coleman in 48 hours.
You do on Surly, sir.
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23 minutes ago, cochamps said:Pos rec for a very solid post, but fuck off for the vanilla ice cream analogy. That was pathetic.
This post is like salted caramel ice cream. It’s a little bit sweet, and then a little bit salty.
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I hope you guys have your pitchforks sharpened. My understanding is that the guy doing the steering towards ATM is @SydneyCarton’s redass aggie relative on the staff there at LJ’s school and I’m not even joking. Solid work, bud.
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I guess I’ll go ahead and say it: Chris Ash can lick our collective asshole, pack his shit, and head for the state border.
He was a fucking bum at Rutgers. Just complete trash in every way. He showed up here with his own brand of cronyism and mediocrity by imposing inexperienced trash on the program with the Valai hire. Valai immediately sprinted out and took a hogger-sized dump on the 50 yard line of the Texas program by being worthless as a coach and a nonentity in recruiting.
Ash delivered vanilla ice cream competence. Nothing special or unique, just gave the defense a vague hint of average. Outside of some time under Meyer while surrounded by other star coaches, Ash has amounted to sad comedy at worst and meh-relevance at best. Hit the fucking bricks, buddy, we’ll take our chances in the open market.
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This thread title needs an enhancement. All Bags, No Brakes is just sitting there waiting to be taken.
I plan on launching a 2024 thread with the tag line “Show Me Your Cause” or “Martinis, They’re What’s For Breakfast” soon.
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5 hours ago, Kurt Bowels said:Did Millwee turn down Butch Jones or did he get passed over? Aren't there reports coming out now that he got passed over? Yeah, it is probably unrealistic for him to take an analyst role for one more year. Just trying to make sense of everything.
A simple fucking google search reveals the press release links for Milwee being officially announced at Arkansas State. What more is needed for shit like that.
5 hours ago, canadianhorn21 said:It's been reported Milwee isn't a big recruiting guy as well. Just a thought.
This is just repeating a stupid fucking take from Eric Nahlin who doesn’t know shit about Milwee as a recruiter. No one tracked him as a recruiter at Akron. No one can now credibly report on him from his time at Akron. He was an analyst at Bama that everyone there thought highly of and was the first guy Butch Jones, and then Sarkisian, grabbed when leaving for a position coach role. No one gets to not be aggressive in recruiting at Bama.
I am going to start happily negging every post going forward that mentions Milwee as a weak recruiter. The truth is, he might wind up being a shitty recruiter, but that will only be discovered, same as if he’s awesome at it, at Texas.
5 hours ago, Teryor said:He wasn't recruiting because he was an analyst what the fuck are we even doing at this point suggesting our QB coach isn't going on the road
"Hey Quinn Ewers, you know the guy who would be working with you on a daily basis? He would love to be here to see you but can't because he's not allowed to recruit off-campus"
Agreed. The level of stupid and just pure bizarre ignorance on this thread today, after reading and catching up is just stunning, even for this site.
Golding has gone from pure fan fiction to the de facto, matter of fact guy that Sarkisian has hired at DC, in roughly 3 days. Further, Sirmon went from a joke on this thread that looked serious to someone that the fucking $9.95ers actually started reporting on.
Joseph and Milwee are apparently coming here to be analysts.
Joseph is also apparently an underwhelming hire?
I mean, get the fuck out of here with this shit.
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31 minutes ago, Getafix said:
Aaaarrrggghhhhh. I was quickly typing while waiting on the doc during an eye exam. That’s what I get for not getting to proofread.
29 minutes ago, Texas Wahoo said:May be nothing, but may suggest The LB coach is out (as suspected).
It could just be that he should have never been recruited at Texas and was one of the slowest LBs since Dusty Renfro.
28 minutes ago, Machinator said:Not sure about that. Dele was just never a fit for the style of football player these days unless you're in the Big Ten.
I remember on the recruiting board, at some point breaking the news that during practices right after he arrived that he was clearly the slowest non-lineman on the team. Had to have been on Shaggy. Can’t remember who, but there had to have been some howling from some of the regulars back then. The poor bastard would probably all-conference at Northwestern or Minnesota or something.
13 minutes ago, texifornia said:See excuse fed to @Getafix, sir.
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7 minutes ago, Handcruser said:
I don’t think it’s been “just here”. Several “sources” have hinted about a possible change at Bama which would mean Golding might be available.Yeah, that’s covered in the thread but it is moving fast. My point is why is Surly taking this Golding shit at face value. It’s come from idol speculation on the Bama boards and the Texas gurus who don’t know shit right now. There’s no substance to the rumor.


Sark after dark COACHING STAFF thread
in Football
Posted
The guy doesn’t make shit up. If he’s guessing, or doesn’t know, he’ll phrase or say so accordingly.
Exactly.