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Posts posted by Tex Long
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For those wondering what the next health crisis will be.
The Pope has already been diagnosed, and is living on borrowed time, likely no more than two to four years, max. That is the real reason he finally opted for Florida over Texas, so Shelley can be closer to kids and grandkids. Shows his tender side winning out over eternal greatness.
The problem is related directly to the arachnoid cyst that lives in his brain. Turns out it's not a (mostly) benign cyst, it's an actual spider, growing slowly but surely, and eating the gray matter through Urban's central and peripheral nervous systems.
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4 minutes ago, Texasrocks said:
And then have sex with it?
Only if there's a monkey involved.
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This is a fake podcast. It show a "motto" of
QuoteA podcast much like the board. Focused on sports and fun
Errbody knows the board is focused on the sexual proclivities of South Austin's Mom.
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Saban is not coming here as DC. Anyone who thinks that is completely shitful.
Saban is going to be our Assistant AD for Football. Mark it down.
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35 minutes ago, sdm said:
Yes, it's true. This man has no dick.
Technically, no, it's not true. Technically he has a "dick" ... of sorts. However, its lengthlessness and girthlessness are such that most women are equipped with a clitoris that is considerably more dickish, and that includes not only Pole Assassin but South Austin's Mom.
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9 minutes ago, ElChupacabra said:
Oh boy. You're tougher than I am for sure. That would be a really, really big deal for me...
Naah - a little bit of GHB and you won't
feelremember a thing. -
Just now, Tex Long said:
Luke was never in. Luke was always out.
Season tOsu HC Record
2011 Fickell 6-6
2012 Meyer 12-0
Luke had Cincy playing over their heads against UGa, should've won, but fell victim to exactly what Urban said about the G5 teams... they can start 1's equal to P5 1's ... but will lose because they can't match the depth and so just run out of gas. Maybe he's learned since 2011, but still, well let him learn some more at some other P5.
damned cat jumped on keyboard, submit key targeted, no edit showed up for the post...
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28 minutes ago, Rip76 said:
Luke’s out
Luke was never in. Luke was always out.
Season tOsu HC Record
2011 Fickell 6-6
2012 Meyer 12-0
Luke had Cincy playing over their heads against UGa, should've won, but fell victim to exactly what Urban said about the G5 teams... they can start 1's equal to P5 1's ... but will lose because they can't match the depth and so just run out of gas. Maybe he's learned since 2011, but still, well let him
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14 minutes ago, IDIOTsavant said:
Christopher Marlowe I believe, but can't say for certain.
Bacon. Maybe only School of...
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I see a new motto, forming up in the fog and sleet: Standarder Or Bust!!!
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11 minutes ago, closetojumping said:
I think Texas is swinging for the fences on this hire.
You know we are.
I haven't seen anything that looks like he's changed, or is changing, his mind at this point. No opting out on this one...
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7 hours ago, UDontKnow said:
Did you mean discourse?
Read a fucking dictionary if you ever post again.
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The deal is done. It's been done since back around Thanksgiving. Part of the deal is that Urban gets an Assistant AD for Football, to insulate him and be a go-between with the AD. Urban is in charge, including the timing and situation of the Announcement. It is coming, and it will be everything we hoped for. We can speculate why Urban is doing it this way, and what are the elements driving the timing, but it won't do any good, other than giving us all our pleasures of social intercourse.
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I'm wondering if this is a joke. The contorted conjunction of "more standard" with "article-like" and "experience" seems to guarantee tongue is firmly in cheek. God damn, but I sure as hell hope that's what's going on, because I do believe I'm not the only surly asshole who wants nothing to do with anything even remotely connected to "standard" - should we be helping our school find a standard head coach? If I want "article-like" content, I'll look for some "magazine-like" source for it.
Fuck me, but I'd rather you keep the format as-is and use ads/no-ads and/or paywall to extract that $9.95 erry month... but maybe I'm the only one who likes it just fine already.
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My content behavior got changed from first unread to first overall. I did not change this, the site did, probably for the others as well. Bad show.
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3 minutes ago, CowboyFred said:
Clicking on a thread title now takes you to the first post instead of the last unread post, shit borked?
Borked here, too... same thing.
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1 hour ago, stork642 said:
High Freeze would be better than both. If we are going for a broken person but a great head coach it should be Freeze.
But is his junk bigger than Mister Future's fist? Or at least harder to handle?
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2011, and the 6-6 regular season, by the way, was Luke Fickell's interim year as HC. Urban came in and took a substantially identical team to 12-0 - woulda been better but on probation for Tressel lying about being aware of tattoogate, so no B1G title, no bowl.
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4 minutes ago, Octavian said:
You forgot Pantoni, Spumante, Macaroni, and Linguine
Not available, #MensaTom used them for side dishes with his Thanksgiving Ravioli. A hearty meal always helps when game-planning for the most important, do-or-die game of your life - so far.
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Y'all boys (and girls, allegedly) are a god damned beating.
Oh, look! This means he's coming! Oh, noes! That means he's not coming! Yes! No! Maybe! Maybe not! Maybe (go) fuck yourself!
Herman is out, Urban is in. We've acceded to pretty much every demand he had. For all we know, there may be written agreements already, which will be replaced by the actual contract at hiring. The "when" of it is up to Urban, basically. It appears that he wants to wait until the tOSU 2020 Title Run has played out - I can't think of any other good basis he might have for delaying. He has at least two jobs right now, one at Fox as Chief Talking Head for Football, and one at tOSU as Assistant AD for Football, and it seems likely he wants to make sure he's on his Happy Trail and his path is such that his existing commitments are handled properly. Supposably the Fox contract ends 12/19, so we likely won't be announcing hiring before then. tOSU could continue until the CFP Final, provided they're not sidetracked by Northwestern or by more bizarre outcomes with Ala-Fla or ND-Clemson. I think that Urban has already passed his pre-employment physical, although if something makes him even slightly uncomfortable, he could bail, but all the actions and talking we've seen have not pointed in that direction.
In case you missed it: he's coming, just not until his FOX job and his tOSU jobs are done. If the right refs get paid well enough, Northwestern could derail tOSU and our waiting could be over Saturday evening.
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Sam Ehlinger
in Football
Posted
Out far west Texas way, that'd be Scrotal Circumference. Y'all run with that.