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Gap03

Certifiably Surly
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Everything posted by Gap03

  1. "We definitely need to do something about 'mental health' in this country. And by 'mental health', I mean the crazy shit that other people do that might suggest that they could spiral into a murderous frenzy, but none of the same shit that I do. Because, rest assured, I'm a super-stable genius, worthy of trust with my weapons designed to do maximum tissue damage - but with absolutely no obligation to safeguard my weapons or provide any proof of training / skill with my pew-pew toys self-defense equipment because, as we all know, 2nd Amendment / 'shall not be infringed' / 'Don't tread on me' ..." / "Reasonable" GQP folks after latest school shooting
  2. Cue up the Onion ...
  3. Yeah, let's spend a few hundred thousand bucks fighting a complex copyright case just so we can continue to use fucking "Electric Avenue." Very stable genius indeed ...
  4. GQP-appointed federal judges:
  5. Plus, in #9, you can shit on Clarence Thomas for a few hours ...
  6. At the cemetary ... with the former president whose favorite song is YMCA ... as one does ...
  7. So are the ladies in the white top and the blue dress throwing up some hook'ems or do they just wanna rock?
  8. I'm thinking it's going to be TS singing a new song to the melody of "Mean" called "Weird" - as in "... and all you're ever gonna be is weird, why you gotta be so weird?"
  9. All spent on border-related ads pandering to the mythical "moderate Republicans" that will never even consider voting for his bland ass.
  10. Rational numbers? Cool. Irrational numbers???? Fuck that - (I'll show myself out now ...)
  11. In Dana's defense (which will be a one-time thing), that's not what she said at all. (I know - hard to fathom intellectual dishonesty from Charlie 8-Head ...) She was just saying that they weren't targeting the type of insecure dipshits that get revved up by Hulk Hogan's shtick. Of course, it works because it's hard to listen to more than 5 seconds of her meandering commentary.
  12. Richard bringing the heat and laying down facts.
  13. Just venting - but if they are practicing, it would seem they are doing it wrong.
  14. Naw - they rack up all their golds in table tennis (4), badminton (2), diving (7) and shooting (5) - you know, where true athletic ability shines ...
  15. Apparently, no. No, we do not ever practice handoffs at fucking all for our relays. That's fucking embarrassing - just spend a few hours on it in the weeks beforehand and we'd have gold. But no, we're just going to count on pure speed in an event where fumbling around for 3-4 seconds over the race fucks you.
  16. I mean, putting those moochin' street urchins to work is part of the Project 2025 plan, so it seemed like that might be legit. I was about to do some digging until I saw the couches ...
  17. She must work out ...
  18. CNN trying to steal the NY Times shtick. Fuck both of them.
  19. Not enough e. coli and brain-eating amoeba ...
  20. Yep - it was a gritty performance given her calf issues, but you just can't give up 0.6 off the top like that. I have no issue with Andrade getting the gold there.
  21. Aaaand here come Elon and the culture warriors to try to kick up a distraction for their boy ...
  22. Was just about to comment on Jebediah there. If he wants to be the Amish version of the "Blacks for Trump" guy that was going to all of the Trump rallies back in 2020, he better get his shit straight and keep the technology off-camera from here on out ... and maybe bring a butter churn to the next rally.
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