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chainsaw

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Everything posted by chainsaw

  1. chainsaw

    Bert!

    He ain't come to UMiami to play school. Or football. Made friends with some cool Colombian guys.
  2. Harder to gravepiss there, I'd bet
  3. chainsaw

    Bert!

    Miss me yet? I'm the REAL kicker at UMiami guys. We just use the other guy as a DECOY
  4. Give me Convicts by 1.
  5. aka the Bernie Moreno - Art Bell Beef Tallow Emporium
  6. This is a pattern with Sark, though. Tweak these things and the team will succeed. Keep them the same, and it'll take a miraculous play from a 1st Round WR talent to beat Arizona State.
  7. This is what bothers me about Sark. He more than anyone should've been aware of these issues and should've fixed them but didn't.
  8. Only two things about this game separated the result we got (14-7 Loss) from the result we wanted (Texas blows out the sad nuts): Drive-extending penalties Sad nuts failed to convert on 3rd down, but got 15 yards because of a stupid hands to the face penalty. They eventually scored on a CJ Donaldson run, and we spotted 'em an additional 10 yards because of a Malik Muhammad hold. Cost: 7 points Short yardage erectile dysfunction First drive, near midfield, couldn't get 2 yards to extend the drive and put us in FG range. Cost: 3 points or more Start of the 2nd half, Defense held the sad nuts to a 3 and out, we march down the field, and can't punch it in from the 1 yard line. Cost: 7 points Nuts had just scored to start the 4th quarter, we march down the field, and once again can't find the end zone. Cost: 7 points Final drive of the game, defense responded to our last impotent drive by forcing a 3 and out, after a deep punt, Arch gets us to midfield, but once again can't move the chains. Cost: 3 points or more If those two things had been fixed, we were on track for anything from a 27-7 to a 35-7 game, and that doesn't even take into account how much the trajectory of the game would have been impacted by Arch gaining confidence, quieting the crowd, and other scoring options opening up due to adjustments they felt like they'd had to have made. Maybe Sayin wouldn't have had the confidence to find Tate on that incredible 3rd quarter catch, either. Lots of coulda, woulda, shoulda. The point I'm making here is how much these little things can totally alter the outcome of a game.
  9. chainsaw

    Bert!

    Don't pretend you're not interested. It's CFB on a Sunday.
  10. It was brilliant that the inaugural game was against a D2 cupcake. Wonderful for confidence. Now they're on the road against a fellow five-letter FCS opponent, PVAMU, coming off a close win over Texas Southern. I'll take PVAMU in a close one.
  11. chainsaw

    Bert!

    Debut is today
  12. Can listen on a Mexican Radio if you don't have ESPN+ https://player.amperwave.net/13749
  13. In one word, this team is indecisive. You can hide that against mediocre competition, but it's painfully obvious otherwise. We have no identity on offense. That's no coincidence. It's a clear symptom of indecision. Hard conversations about "who are we gonna be" that never took place. Why not? It starts at the top. The culture of indecision is evident from the rash of headscratcher playcalls. If Sark had devised any kind of strategy going into Saturday, you wouldn't know it from watching the game. The most charitable way to interpret that first half was that Sark wanted to conceal the team's capabilities and playbook, but the likeliest explanation is that he failed to select a strategic approach, which affected how the team prepared. The result being an offense consisting of jacks-of-all-plays, masters of none. Arch looked hesitant and lost many times, too. Other than the two ore three times when he reverted to his "It Factor" mode, Arch did not have the look of a quarterback that's certain about what he wanted to do, or certain of what his alternatives would be and how he would choose among the alternatives. Plenty of dudes were wide open, plenty of running lanes were available, but his hesitation and indecision paralyzed him out there. The offense never quite got going, and I blame the culture of indecision Sark has cultivated. Although these symptoms of indecision are most pronounced in the Red Zone, they were evident pretty much the entire game. Although the symptoms died down in the late 4th quarter, like a bad case of herpes, never quite fully went away. This is not a problem that coachspeak will fix. Sark needs to address the plague of indecision if he ever wants the team to be championship caliber and not just merely elite.
  14. I fucking despise Jeff Traylor, but please baby Jesus let the funniest thing happen....
  15. If we're gonna be liberated from fascism, liberals will contribute nothing more than cheerleading from the sidelines. And the Democratic Party? Probably will spend most of its energy tone policing the cheering liberals.
  16. Not a good enough Jew for you?
  17. ...as Castellanos walks into the end zone
  18. First half, looked like Sark had Arch on a short leash. Probably because his ability to read elite coverages is pretty bad. Fixable, and I'd have hoped he'd be much further along in that regard. Early parts of the second half I noticed some yips. A few moments where he wanted to escape the short leash, sometimes successfully and other times with an INT but for the grace of God. Late fourth quarter, I saw his "it" factor come out, but it was too late and too unreliable to change the outcome of the game. For him to be in the conversation for Heisman, he will need big wins, an SEC championship, and video game stats against the unworthy opponents.
  19. Body Double. These aren't in short supply in South Florida
  20. The API gods are still in your favor
  21. A lot of folks on the right say that God saved him from that bullet. What if Satan did it?
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