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Kringelbert Fishtybuns

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  1. Was at Far West and Mopac. The kids looked at me after they passed with a WTF face. They were ready to get back to playing in the backyard. I don’t blame them as I was ready to get back to work.
  2. Is this on an absolute or relative scale? When my 7 yo writes a story for class, I don’t get mad that it’s not Shakespeare.
  3. Italy’s death toll rose today to its highest so far 919. Previous high was last Saturday at 793. So, that sucks.
  4. Fake news. We are not all fat. Just the overwhelming big-boned majority who claim that if they lost a single pound their respective other would send them to an oncologist.
  5. This is why I have been drinking George T Stagg instead of water for the past month. Because science.
  6. I never realized he wrote the novel Viva Max! I’m going to have to give it a read, as the movie was pretty solid.
  7. A 17 minute David Lynch film was just put on Netflix, What Did Jack Do?. The cast includes Lynch, a monkey, a chicken and a waitress who has a line or two. The film’s synopsis reads “In a locked down train station, a homicide detective conducts an interview with a tormented monkey.” It is as advertised.
  8. I like Torchys, but that sounds like an overpriced Double Decker Taco.
  9. Infinite Jest (VI) - Released The Year of the Flaming Hot Cheetos Puffy Taco. Poor Yorick Entertainment Unlimited. Incadenza’s recently found secret final-final film; 85 mins; black and white; silent/sound. Initially thought to be blank, archivist found that by ingesting a potentially lethal dose of DMZ, a five minute recording was visible playing in a continual loop. In this sequence, an obese Uncle Sam masturbates furiously while attempting to eat from a plate of falafel. He begins to choke, but soon recovers, only to attempt to eat from the plate again.
  10. Justines is awesome. If you are shorter in time and frugal, El Michoacano is tip top and across 71 from the airport.
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