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Crapinon

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Everything posted by Crapinon

  1. Crapinon

    Getting old sucks

    WSJ was paywalled and I'm not sure how I got around it the 1st time. Here's the article via MSN.com https://www.msn.com/en-us/health/medical/is-your-brain-aging-faster-than-you-new-science-offers-clues/ar-AA1HELmB
  2. My wife is always complaining that she wants a maid to help clean. I told her that she would want to clean the house before the maid got there and since it would never happen, we'd never get one.
  3. Crapinon

    Getting old sucks

    There's a lot of criticism because of small sampling but it's a interesting read. And no one takes into consideration that learning the bagpipes helped him. https://www.wsj.com/health/wellness/brain-age-health-lifestyle-012262b3
  4. Crapinon

    Getting old sucks

    The last batch of contacts I received had the lenses inserted in the case backwards. I had to reverse the curve on them to see correctly. They came out of the case like this "(" but should have been like this ")". If you look close at the edges you see which way they should go.
  5. What's the over/under on the number of days before this guy blows through his half of the $167 million jackpot. Remember to take into consideration he might be going back to prison for a while. But then again, his girlfriend will probably spend it for him. https://www.thesmokinggun.com/documents/stupid/powerball-winner-196078
  6. I thought this was the ultimate troll job. But he really was on the roster. Never heard of shomer negiah. I didn't even know my wife was Jewish. https://texags.com/forums/5/topics/3538864
  7. Was he supposed to move before the kid could get his toe up his butt?
  8. I once superglued the handset down to some of the phones in our office. We (well I did) laughed like hell when our uber Aggie, corp turd boss, almost knocked himself out when he slammed the entire phone against the side of his head answering it.
  9. I'd leave my vehicle there overnight and take an Uber home. Show him who's the boss.
  10. Do you need a special permit to park ON the Handicapped ramp?
  11. Does "Abruptly" mean she sailed into town and crashed landed into the side of a building or on the street?
  12. Thanks for the help! On the join page, you have the option to register with the CMP.
  13. Crapinon

    Getting old sucks

    A side if getting old sucks I didn't consider. Our 42nd wedding anniversary is next week. Whenever my wife mentions it younger people (not that much younger either), have been asking "What's the secret to a long marriage?". That's definitely an "ask an old person" question. Someone ask us that today and I told her you need to learn to tolerate each other. I think my future answer will also include having separate TV's.
  14. I thought I dodged a bullet on the car buying experience. My wife's car is 8 years old with 95K miles. I've been telling her we either need to get a new one or spend some money on getting new strut's, brakes, etc. for hers. I've dragged her around to look at new cars and asked her what she wanted to do, which she never answers. I've made appointments to look at cars and she wouldn't go. So I just gave up assuming she was content. So we got a notice that she's getting some money from social security and I told her we could use it to fix her car. Then she asked me about getting a new car and asked why I waffle on getting one. I told her I didn't care and I was just following her lead of being non-committal. She then went on a rant that she never said she didn't want a new one, she likes all of them and it was my decision not to get a new one. When I pressed her on the fact that every time I tried to buy one she backed off, she said "Well I just started thinking about spending the money and thought I didn't really need one when there's nothing wrong with mine". I said "So I'm to blame for following your lead of indecision and waffling to get a new car?" Silence.
  15. My daughter once poured a bottle of synthetic deer urine down the air induction vents of a guys car. He was a racist, misogynist, pig, so I applauded her creativity.
  16. After experiencing step son life with an "I'm your stepmother and you have to obey and all my obscure rules without question" life during teenage years, I told my wife I'd never get remarried if she died. She said I couldn't go without the sex. I told her I could rent the sex and still have peace of mind afterwards.
  17. Yeah. My mom died of cancer after 28 years of marriage. He remarried 3 years later and was married to her for 5 years before he died. I would have dug my stepmother up all by myself and moved her if she was buried next to him.
  18. A real long story short. My mom and dad bought 3 plots in the 60's at Mt Olivet in Fort Worth. They both died and were buried there. I got married and knew I was never going to die so I told my Aunt that she could be buried next to her sister, my mother and I'll figure my situation out later. I let the funeral home know this. 10 years later, when she died, they faxed me paperwork to sign with the intent of sign the real documents when I arrived back to FW for the funeral. I arrived 45 minutes before the funeral and was pulled into an office to be told they weren't going to bury her because I didn't have title to the "property", it belonged to my much disliked step mother. I screamed, yelled, called him a stupid MF'er. I insulted him, his intelligence and the motive behind waiting 45 minutes before the funeral to bring it up. I finally told him that if he doesn't get it fixed, I was going to go get my remaining aunt and 2 uncles and unleash them on him and he would soon realize that he was dealing with the nice person in the family. He made a call and let it go through. A month later, I told my aunt, who proceeded to drive to the funeral home and let him have it for another hour.
  19. LOL. I was trying to post a spoiler pic from my phone. I'm old and it didn't work and then I couldn't edit it.
  20. Duh! You can't buy an $80,000 Tahoe for less than $1000 month without 84 month financing!
  21. Same. I went to a Catholic elementary school in the 60's. Being left handed was morally wrong and they forced me to do everything right handed, like GOD intended.
  22. Well I might have dodged a bullet anyway. I think my wife wants to keep her 9 year old, 95K mile Hyundai. She's driven several new cars, from cheap to semi-expensive and seems to have no interest. She kept complaining that they didn't have CD players and none of the 50 way adjustable seats felt right. I'm retiring this year and will lose my company truck. I guess I'll buy me something instead.
  23. I was on a small commuter jet once when claustrophobia set in. I wasn't sure I was going to make the 30 minute trip. Before we left the DFW terminal they had us leave the plane and transferred us to another one. No problems on the second (and same size) plane. Turns out it had mechanical problems. I kind of felt like William Shatner on that one. My wife and I were in an elevator that shut down between floors. Just 4 of us in it and I was trying to pry the door open and get out. And don't even get me started on MRI's....... I can't watch these videos. It would keep me up at night.
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