My kid was asked not to return to his school today. Private catholic school, kindergarten. He's been having behavioral problems since he started school last fall. He had problems in Pre K too. The school was willing to deal with certain things like running out of the classroom, hiding under his desk, being generally noncompliant. They weren't willing to tolerate him hitting other kids. They did for a while, but when other kids' parents started to complain the administrators' hands were tied. The first thing that happened is they recommended that we retain him. That was early February. That was a kick in the nuts. Then we had to come pick him up during their recess period so he wouldn't hit other kids. That was the time when it mostly occurred. Finally today he hit a kid with his backpack right when he got there. That was it. It would be really easy to be angry with the school and blame them for a lot of it, but the truth is that they tried. They didn't handle everything perfectly, but at the end of the day they are not the problem, my kid is.
We had him in group therapy sessions last fall and that seemed to help some. When things started going off the rails this semester the group therapy sessions were full so we had him go one on one with a therapist. No visible change. We initiated the full battery of diagnostic testing to determine what's wrong with him. We just finished that today and we won't get answers for at least a week.
I'm pretty much freaking out. My wife and I have been doing a helluva lot of work to keep him in this school and to get him to at least be able to stay at the school during the day. He just can't do it. No matter how much we cajole, reward, threaten, love on him. Nothing works. He just can't do it. my wife and I are both exhausted and scared. I am really worried about his future. In the immediate term, we have no idea what to do with him now. Where do kids who are expelled go? We got him a spot, mostly as a favor, from the pre-k where he was before for the next two months. We don't think he can go back to the same school. We tested out the public school we're zoned to for our oldest for kindergarten and I was not impressed. And for a kid with issues? I just can't imagine it's going to be better. But then again, I've been told that public schools have more resources for this kind of thing. It's really a black hole for me. We know of and have been told about private options. They sound great - for a cool 40 grand a year. That might be out of our reach unless we make some drastic changes to our lifestyle.
I'm really struggling with this. Just knowing what to do and handling it...I don't even know where to start. I'm trying to show support and love to my kid; that's all I really know to do. I'm terrified about the future. What if he just can't be in a traditional school environment? Will he be able to get any kind of education? What are his prospects for going to college, getting a job, having relationships? I'm feeling pretty helpless and really scared for my kid. Anyone have any experience with this?